Winter Interlude (38 page)

When he risked another glance, her expression wielded the same passion that swamped him, and he couldn’t resist reaching for her
.
She didn’t hesitate to close the distance between them, planting a soft kiss
—
one full of promise
—
upon his lips
.
He’d kissed her twice before but nothing prepared him for the
jolt of
longing that
suddenly
overwhelmed him
.

T
he kiss grew hotter, more intense
,
and
he waited for his remorse to surface
.
He felt none
.
What emerged instead
was
jealousy
, a
nd an all-consuming desire to erase James from
Kate
’s memory
.

As irrational as the thought was, he couldn’t stop himself from
gently
nipping his way across her chin and up to her ear
.
“Do you have any idea how much I want you?”

A soft moan that traveled straight to his gut was her only response
,
one that drove him further over the edge of sanity
.
“Does he make you burn like this
?
Does he make you feel on fire like this?” he whispered, unable to contain the jagged torment from slipping out in
his
questions
.
He shouldn’t want her, but he was tired of fighting
the
attraction
that went
so
much deeper tha
n
simple lust.
Kissing her soothed his soul and took away the lon
e
liness.

“No
.”
She pulled away and pushed on his chest
.
“We can’t do this.”

The sudden movement and words jarred him fully awake
.
He leaned back against the sofa, bringing her with him
. He
closed his eyes, reaching for
normalcy
.

After gaini
ng full control, he faced her.
“Why can’t we do this?”

“Because…” Her voice trailed off.
She
fixed her gaze
on
her sweat
s
and picked at a piece of
nonexistent
lint.

“That’s not a good enough reason.”

She cleared her throat and smoothed the cotton fabric of her sweatpants.
“We’re both in other relationships.”

“
Didn’t we
both decide to end those relationships
?
”

“Ye
s, b
ut…
y
ou don’t understand,” she murmured, not meeting his gaze, as a guilt-ridden flush spread across her features
.
“There’s Judith.” She hesitated.
“And James.
T
hey deserve more.
”

He barely heard the last two s
entences
.
Watching the emotions run their gamut, Paul assumed the worst
.
She regretted her actions because of James
.
Maybe he should regret his actions because of Judith, too, and he might
have
, if Judith had ever responded to his kisses like
Kate
had.
S
urprising
ly, the jealousy he felt toward
James ebbed as
another
realization set in
.
Their shared kiss proved his brother and
Kate
weren’t meant to be
,
any more than he and Judith
.
He felt it in every fiber of his being
.
She’d never respond to him so naturally and wholly if she truly loved his brother
.
Somehow
,
he had to make her realize that fact
.

He hugged her fiercely
.
“It’s okay
.
We’ll work it out,” he said, before kissing her forehead
.
B
ecause he believed his
own
words, a bud of hope sprung up inside his soul
.

~

W
hat have I done
?
Kate’s
shame mushroomed
.
Too horrified to move, she felt Paul’s
hands
slide up and down her back in a soothing motion she didn’t deserve
.
There was no excuse for her rash behavior, except he’d looked so lonely sleeping on the sofa
.
W
hen he’d woken up and
looked into her eyes
,
a
sense of loneliness called to her
.
She’d felt compelled to kiss him to try
to
take the isolation away
.
Whether his or hers, she wasn’t sure
,
and that only added to her guilt
.

Unwilling to acknowledge the feelings he evoked, she extricated herself from his hold and stood
.
Still too embarrassed to face him, she pivoted and headed toward the guesthouse as fast as her legs could carry her
.

I
n the privacy of the outside room, she rushed to the bed and climbed under the covers, remaining stiff as stone with her eyes closed
.
How could she have foolishly given into the urge to kiss him
l
ike some brazen hussy
?
W
orse
still…t
his time she couldn’t blame Paul
.
No
!
She’d taken advantage of his relaxed state, had wanted to
feel her lips on his
more than anything
.
So much so
,
that betraying Judith hadn’t seemed to matter
.
What kind of friend did that
?

And what about James
?
She groaned and placed her hand
s
over her eyes as more shame engulfed her
.
Only two days ago, he’d been her world and marriage to him had been her life’s goal. Yet, instigating a kiss with his brother, then desiring more than just a kiss belied everything she thought she knew about herself
.
Thank God, she’d put
on
the brakes when she had
.
Otherwise, they’d have surely ended up in bed
.
Talk about giving the milk away for free
.

Tomorrow
.
She’d
deal with
this tomorrow
.

~

P
ristine white snowdrifts reflected morning sunlight that
poured
in through the windows when Paul emerged from the
bed
room feeling one hundred percent better than
he had
the day before
.
Using the towel around his neck to dry his hair, he headed for the kitchen
,
thankful for electricity. The house was finally warm and he’d been able to shave in
front of the bathroom mirror
, which meant fewer nicks
.
Best of all, putting on a pot of coffee wouldn’t be the same ordeal as yesterday
.

Today, the bean grinding
took only seconds
.
He poured them into the filter and added water
before
turn
ing
on the machine
.
Listening to the slurping noise and watching coffee drip while the
Krups
worked its magic, he leaned against the counter
.
His thoughts centered on
Kate
and how he should best proceed with her
.
Nothing would sway him from the belief that s
he’d run away last night, too afraid to face what was between them
.

As the brewing process neared completion, he took two cups from the cupboard and grabbed the half
-
and
-
half out of the fridge
.

Thoughts
of
Kate
,
and
the memory of
the warmth of her lips pressed against his
,
made him want to bay at the moon
.
A
sense of joy
permeated
his heart
.
Never before had a memory elicited such an intense reaction
.
He’d never responded with that much emotion or physical attraction toward anyone, not even Judith
.
With Judith, it’d never been about sex
.
If he w
ere
honest with himself, he’d have to admit that
he wasn’t that
sexually attracted to her
.
She certainly didn’t inspire the same soul-searing need that
Kate
did
.
In fact, no one he’d ever dated attracted him in that way
.
Why had he
been willing to accept
any
less
for so long
?