Winter Storm (6 page)

She could tell Dina was pleased that she remembered the boy’s name.
Contrary to what you believe, I do listen to what you say.

“Florence, can you believe it? It’s so beautiful. Erin and her parents will go in the summer. Hey, maybe we can go too? I suppose there’s a lot of money coming with the prize Callie won.”

“Not as much as you think, but I’ll break the idea to her.” Rebecca made sure that neither her tone nor her smile was indulgent. She never been to Europe either. At some point, she and David had talked about the possibility of a longer vacation. They had postponed it when they found out she was pregnant with Maggie.

“It’s so awesome! Tomaso showed us pictures. You wanna see? I mean, only if you want to.”

Rebecca had hesitated a moment too long, startled by the offer. “Of course.”

She looked over Dina’s shoulder when she logged in on her Facebook page, watching her type in the password. She pretended not to have noticed.

Dina had roughly two hundred “friends,” including Erin Shelton and Tomaso De Luca. She hadn’t promised too much—the photographs on his site were truly beautiful, a dream landscape. Well, dream was the imperative here, because Rebecca couldn’t see herself making such a big trip at the moment.

“I bet he’s missing the pizza from home,” she commented. Dina rolled her eyes.

“That’s such a cliché. We have good food here…okay, actually he does.”

They laughed together. Rebecca cherished the happy carefree moment even more considering it had become rare lately.

“With all those friends, when do you have time for school?”

“Don’t start, Mom. I’ve got all the A’s. Anna’s parents watch her like hawks, and by proxy I get to study all the time too.”

Her friend’s parents had reason to be cautious. Anna had asked Dina to hide a pregnancy test for her in the past year.

“That’s not so bad then.”

“No.” Dina smiled. “I liked being good at something. You want to show Callie?”

“Tomorrow. She’s pretty beat from the day.”

“I bet it’s exciting too. If I was her, I don’t know if I’d want to come back to Autumn Leaves, ever. I mean because of Tim and Matt…”

“They’re in jail now,” Rebecca said, sharper than she had intended. She didn’t want to get into that topic, and she didn’t like the implications of Dina’s words. There was absolutely no reason for Callie to leave.

“Yeah, thank God. Too bad they’re not going to keep those assholes forever.” For once, Rebecca saw no reason to correct her daughter’s language. “What will you and Callie do when they are out?”

“There’ll be a few years to come before that. They might not even come back to Autumn Leaves where everybody knows what they did.”

How did they get from pictures of sunrises and wine to the next scary subject? The two men had been found guilty of rape. Callie had escaped them in time, but her nightmares were an indication of how close it had been.

“I don’t want to spend all my life there either,” Dina claimed. “I know you were always comfortable there, but I want to see more of the world, you know?”

Rebecca wanted to hug her. It was too early for her to not spend time with Dina on a daily basis—way too early to have her go to faraway places.

“I’m sure you will. All those good grades will pay off for you.”

“How did you know, Mom?” Dina was changing gears quickly once again. “With Callie, and before, with Dad? How did you know you really wanted to be with them?”

“Is there someone…?”

Rebecca had an uncomfortable flashback of a conversation they had the year before, after finding the pregnancy test Dina had hidden for her friend—Anna who was grounded for life by her parents, as it seemed. While Rebecca didn’t think it was the best solution, she could definitely understand them.

“No. I’m just thinking about these things…I want to be prepared when it happens.”

Rebecca had to suppress the smile. In a teenager’s mind, a parent knew nothing one moment, but was supposed to be omniscient the next. How did anybody know? Rebecca hadn’t had a lot of boyfriends by the time she met David Lowman and somehow knew that this was the man she wanted to have a family with.

Callie was a whole other story. Rebecca had simply let go of everything that had been familiar in her life, not knowing or caring if there was a safety net. She couldn’t bring herself to regret anything. She was truly happy.

“I don’t think you can prepare for that. You’ll just know.”

“Thanks, Mom. Could you be any more vague?”

“I could try.”

Dina’s smile was genuine. “Thank you. I mean it. It’s awesome you let me come even though I kind of tricked you. I had a great time today.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you’re here too. Don’t stay online too long, okay?”

“Sure thing.”

Callie was just barely stirring when Rebecca returned to the bedroom.

“That half a bottle really knocked you out,” she said affectionately. “I almost forgot what a lightweight you are.”

Callie mumbled something unintelligible, and then straightened to sit up.

“I hope you didn’t show this to Dina as a bad example? She’s home?”

“No, and yes. Besides, you were just sleeping. That’s hardly a bad example.”

“I’m glad you think so.” Callie yawned. “What a day. I think I need to wash it off some more before I can go to sleep for real. I’m going to try out that bathtub.” She got up from the bed, starting to strip as she went. “You’re welcome,” she said which could be interpreted in many ways.

Rebecca decided she would enjoy the view for starters.

* * * *

When she finally leaned back into Rebecca’s arms in the warm water, the sweet scent of peach rising from the bubble bath, Callie decided it was time to count her blessings. Nightmares were just that, a delusion, a distortion of reality. Nicole’s appearance had been something of a freak accident. At this moment, life was good. She could actually go back to the events of the day and find not everything had been bad. Callie thought of the girl who’d said the ongoing discussion of marriage equality was talked about at her school. It was probably the last thing on Rebecca’s mind right now, with her own divorce that had not gone smoothly in everything, but at some point…

She was still amazed how things that had seemed so vague and unreachable in her life were taking shape, just in the past few months. Callie was looking forward to going back to Autumn Leaves soon and settle in for real. She might end the
Heart Fever
series. It seemed like a good time to go back to children’s literature, too, or even young adult.

“Are you falling asleep on me?” Rebecca asked. “Then we should get out of here.”

“It’s fine. Just a few more minutes, okay?”

“Okay.”

Rebecca brushed a few strands of wet hair back from her face, and Callie closed her eyes. She didn’t think anybody had ever touched her with this much tenderness. Never mind that there had been a time in her life when she’d thought she didn’t deserve this.
Take that, Nicole. I’m home now. How’s that for a change to the better?

* * * *

Monica Shelton called the next day.

“Rebecca, is that you? I’m sorry I’m calling this early, but I was wondering if you were fine with Dina coming over to us for the weekend. You’re here for a few more days, aren’t you? The girls are getting along so well, and this is their last opportunity.”

She was right,
Rebecca thought.
This sounded much too cheery for eight in the morning.

“I’m sure Dina will be happy, but are you sure you don’t mind?”

“Of course not. She’s welcome anytime. I can come pick her up at eleven if she likes?”

Dina stood in the doorway, smiling happily. Rebecca took that as a yes.

“She’ll be ready,” she told Monica. With some resignation, she closed her phone and regarded her daughter quizzically.

“Is that another thing you planned without us?”

“Come on, Mom. It works out for all of us. You and Callie will have the whole day to yourselves.”

“I don’t know. We don’t know this family all that much.” Rebecca wondered if Dina had told David about them—or Susan, even. She always been more of the worrier. David had argued in favor of giving the girls more freedom, but then again, he’d been in and out of their lives due to his job. The “in” phases often meant he had to make it up to them by bending the rules just a little.

“Don’t worry. We don’t do much other than drinking beer and smoking pot. Got you there, Mom.”

Dina cracked up over her own joke, not so much Rebecca who, for a moment, felt like she was going to faint.

“Don’t do anything like that ever again! Okay, you can go. Just…”

“Don’t get in the car with Erin when there’s no adult around, got it. You’re the best.”

Dina hugged her quickly. She always seemed to have to overcome some sense of embarrassment over the impulse. Rebecca made a face to no one behind her back. In a few more years, Maggie would be the same.

“By the way, I talked to Dad. He says hi.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

Dina obviously didn’t expect more of an answer, because she immediately went to choose clothes for her weekend with her new best friend. Rebecca stepped in front of the window, looking down at the busy city. She and Callie didn’t have anywhere to be today. A peaceful day without any surprises, just the two of them…It sounded like heaven.

When Rebecca had first seen New York, it was a big adventure, but she hadn’t felt overwhelmed like recently. Coming back to Autumn Leaves in return was like living in a miniature village, small, certainly safer, but also giving people a lot more time to care about their neighbor’s business.

“Will we have to come here often?” She hoped her question sounded as neutral as it was meant to be. Rebecca wanted to make sure she did her share in this relationship. With David, she thought it was understood that she would take care of their home. She never asked that much about his work, and over time, they had drifted apart further than she’d thought.

“Not really. I don’t go on big book tours, just a few dates here and there. You know, I had to do this, just to prove to myself that I’ve stopped running. Turns out I could survive seeing Nicole again. My life is not here anymore. It’s with you.”

A few times a year…She could work with that when Callie had been turning her life upside down just the same for her.

* * * *

It had been a beautiful day. This was the kind that you kept in your heart and saved there for the moments when you took an unexpected header to the downside, or something even less poetic. Callie had refused to let her life revolve around the more traumatic experiences, her relationship with Nicole, the assault she’d been subjected to. She had enough counseling in her life to have learned tools in order to find another focus. Yet, when she checked her cell phone for new messages, she remembered the meaning of a trigger.

For a long time, she had also worked on making herself believe it hadn’t been all that bad with Nicole, and that a lot of people in relationships were worse off. What happened in Autumn Leaves made it painfully clear that she never exaggerated for a moment. Finding Nicole’s name in her inbox still had enough power to sweep away the achievements she made towards the new life.

Sorry,
Nicole wrote,
I just had to try, and I trusted that you didn’t change your number. Can’t we just talk, to leave it all behind us once and for all? You ran out on me. Even if you don’t need that closure, I do, and I think you owe me that much. Please call me.

“I can’t believe it.” Rebecca shook her head. “She still doesn’t get why you left her. Don’t talk to her. She has to learn someday…Callie?” she asked when there was no reply.

Callie kept staring at the screen, the words mocking her. She didn’t want to talk to Nicole, that much was for sure. She just didn’t know if she could make the problem go away simply by ignoring it.

“Maybe I could make her get it.”

“Why? She didn’t get it the first time. It’s not your job.”

“I’m not talking about doing her a favor.”

“You’re not? How is talking to her anything but doing her a favor?”

“I need to get rid of her once and for all.”

Callie looked up at Rebecca. She could tell that Rebecca was struggling to understand her reasoning, but the idea seemed to make more sense by the minute. If she ignored the message, she’d just worry about the next that would certainly come. She wanted to be able not to care at all at some point. Desensitization therapy. She wanted to feel capable of more than the defensive rambling she’d given Nicole at the bookstore.

“Don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to hang out with her. God knows that didn’t work out so well for me the last time. I’ll let her say what she wants to say, and just let it go.”

Rebecca still looked doubtful. “You must know what feels right for you. I just don’t want you to get hurt. Again.”

“You can’t always protect me.”