With Family In Mind (Saddle Falls Book 1) (18 page)

Jake’s eyelids closed for a moment, and he held himself perfectly still, letting her get used to him, praying he wouldn’t lose control, wouldn’t hurt her.

“Jake, please?” Her soft plea arrowed straight to his loins, and he bent his head to devour her mouth as he thrust slowly, deeply into her accepting warmth.

She reached for him, grabbing his shoulders, pulling him down so she could cover his mouth with hers, wanting to feel him everywhere.

Their tongues touched, tangled in an age-old dance as she dug her nails deeper into his shoulders, begging for more, for release from this incredible, unbearable pressure that made her feel beautiful, wanted,
loved.

She wrapped herself tighter around him as he began to move, thrusting in and out with a frenzy that made her breathless, deaf and blind to everything but the heat and pulse of her body as he fed it, awakened it, satisfied it.

A gasp shuddered out of her as he took her over the first crest, and as the world fell away she all but screamed his name and clung to him, fearing if she didn’t she might fall off.

Pleasure radiated through her, touching every nerve ending, awakening her body as never before. There
was so much pleasure, so many feelings! She couldn’t analyze them right now, simply wanted to savor and enjoy them.

“Rebecca.” Her name ripped from him, a husky moan, as Jake thrust harder, faster, plunging deeper into her, wanting only to satisfy this need for her that burned like an inferno, incinerating everything inside of him.

Rebecca clung to him, moving with him, as she climbed the peak again and they went over the top together.

Jake lay on his back, staring at the ceiling, dazed and all but drained. He’d never experienced anything like what had just happened with Rebecca. Never.

He’d always considered himself a fairly civilized man, especially when it came to women. Vividly aware of his size, he made a point of being gentle, careful. But all thought had gone out of his head the moment he’d touched Rebecca.

Absently, he stroked the back of her head, felt the silk of her hair, wondering if he’d hurt her. It had never occurred to him that he would be her first lover. That both pleased and startled him.

Now he understood why she was so skittish with him. She’d had no experience to speak of, at least none that was evident. He felt both honored and humbled that he’d been her first and her only.

How could she think she could just ignore or walk away from this? From him? And what they’d just had together?

The experience they’d shared, the feelings that had
engulfed them, were much more than physical, way more. He could no more walk away from her now than he could from his family.

She was part of him, a part he never thought he’d have again. A woman he could trust enough to let into his life, his heart, his world.

Overcome by the strength of the moment and what he was feeling, Jake sighed in contentment, just savoring the fact of her soft, feminine body atop his.

“You okay?” he asked quietly, letting his hand drift down the slope of her shoulders, stroking gently. He couldn’t believe that just touching her was arousing him again. He should have been sated, satisfied after what they’d just shared, but found desire growing again.

He continued stroking, letting her get used to the touch of his hand. He planned to have it on her frequently. Her skin was so soft, so delicate…. Hefrowned suddenly, wondering if he’d left marks on her.

“Rebecca?” he said when she didn’t answer. Concerned, he lifted his head to look at her. She smiled against his chest and groaned something unintelligible.

He chuckled, adjusting his long frame more comfortably beneath her. Immediately, his body began to respond again. “What was that, Slick?”

Somehow she managed to find the energy to lift her head. It felt like it weighed a ton. She felt such a sense of peace and contentment, she didn’t want to move.

Ever.

Rebecca made a determined effort to speak, wincing against the brightness of the lamp she’d never
even noticed was on. “I’m fine,” she finally managed to murmur, deciding talking required too much energy. She laid her head back down on his chest, nestling closer for warmth. “Just fine…” she said dreamily, her voice softly muffled against his heart.

Jake found himself grinning. Her eyes were half-closed, her expression slightly dazed, and there was a beautiful smile on her face, making her look almost angelic.

How the hell had he ever thought her cool and dispassionate? he wondered. She was heat and light and everything a man could want.

“Good.” He continued to stroke her shoulder, the length of her back, the curve of her butt. “I’m sorry if I hurt you. I didn’t realize—”

“Hurt me?” Her head came up and she managed to focus in on him. He looked so sweet, so concerned, that she inched her way up his body to reach his lips, making him groan. All trace of pain and sadness was gone from his face—at least for the moment. “You didn’t hurt me, Jake,” she said softly, planting several kisses around his mouth until he was groaning again and tightening his arms around her. “You made me feel…wonderful. Beautiful.” Kissing him full on the mouth, she grinned at him.

“You are beautiful, Rebecca,” he said softly, pushing her hair off her face. He’d been awed by the power of what they’d just shared, stunned by what he felt for her. It was his turn to press a kiss to her mouth, but this one was longer, deeper, leaving them both staggered, stunned and gasping for air. “Absolutely beautiful.”

His words caused her body to heat, her heartbeat to speed up. The way he was looking at her made warmth crawl over her skin, made her ache with need, desire.

Now she recognized it, felt it, acknowledged it, reveled in it. The thought of detaching herself from something so beautiful, so wonderful, simply never occurred to her.

“Jake?” There was a question in her voice, a sauciness in her eyes, as she slowly slid her hands down his chest, pausing to circle one nipple with her nail, delighted when his eyes widened, then darkened as desire caught him, as well.

“You’re asking for trouble,” he said in a husky voice as she bent her head to plant a trail of hot kisses along his neck, slowly sliding her damp mouth down his chest, to gently lick and circle his nipple with her tongue until he groaned.

“Trouble?” Lifting her head, she smiled, feeling a lightness in her heart, her spirit. “Is
that
what this is called?” She shrugged as she raised up to straddle him, making his eyes glaze over a moment before they slid shut with a groan.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had pizza for breakfast before,” Rebecca said, snuggling closer to Jake and munching on a cold slice of pizza. She wouldn’t be having it now except she was starved.

“You haven’t lived until you’ve eaten cold pizza for breakfast.” He took a healthy bite of his own slice, grabbing a glass of orange juice off the bedside table
to wash it down with. “It’s a staple in every male’s diet.”

“Well, then I’m grateful I’m not a male.” Grinning, she pressed a quick kiss to the dark stubble of his chin, then continued eating.

She felt satisfied and sexy, and definitely sated. She’d lost count of how many times they’d made love. They’d been doing so most of the night, that’s all she knew.

She should have been bleary-eyed with exhaustion. She’d been working for almost a week straight, long into the night, sleeping and eating very irregularly, as she normally did when working on a story. And last night she’d had no sleep at all—had, in fact, been exhausted when Jake showed up.

Instead, she felt charged with energy and ready to go, as if she could tackle the world. Good thing, too, because she still had a lot of work to do this morning.

“Jake, what will Tommy say because you didn’t go home last night?” She glanced up at him, crossing her bare leg over his. “Will he be worried?”

With a laugh, Jake shook his head and reached for another piece of pizza from the box he’d set on the bed. “No, I don’t think so. It’s not a rarity for one of us to stay out all night.” He looked down at her, noted with pleasure there seemed to be a hint of jealousy in her eyes. It pleased him no end. “We are all grown men, Rebecca. I’m sure Tommy expects us to stay out once in a while.” Jake’s brows drew together as he chewed thoughtfully. “Except for Jared. Jared hasn’t been on a date since his wife left him. He’s sworn off
women.” With a smile, Jake kissed Rebecca’s forehead. “The guy doesn’t know what he’s missing.”

“Can you blame him?” Rebecca shook her head. “After what he went through, no wonder he’s a bit gun-shy with women.”

“I don’t know if it’s that so much as the fact that he doesn’t want to expose the twins to another woman who’s not going to be a permanent part of their life. They’re still too young to understand, and they get attached to people far too easily.”

“That’s understandable.” She hesitated, not wanting to spoil the moment, but needing to discuss something with him. “Jake?”

“Yeah?” His stomach full, he finished off his last piece of pizza, then kicked the box closed with his foot. When she didn’t respond, he glanced down at her. “What’s on your mind, Slick?”

“You,” she said simply, scooting to a sitting position and pulling the sheet up to cover herself.

“Me?” He grinned, pleased, making her swat him.

“Don’t get arrogant, Ryan.”

“Hey, I’m just happy I’m on your mind.”

“You’ve actually been on my mind a lot lately.”

“Yeah?” The news delighted him. “And here I thought you were deliberately avoiding me.”

“I was,” she admitted carefully. “You know how I feel about getting personal with someone I’m involved with professionally.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said wearily, hoping she wasn’t going to start this again. “But it’s a little late to worry about that now, isn’t it? Considering we just spent the night together, I’d say we’re very personally
involved.” He tried to nuzzle her neck. Laughing, she pushed him away.

“Don’t start that again. I have work to do.”

“Work?” He glanced at the window, where the first streaks of daylight were visible, bringing light and warmth. “It’s not quite dawn yet.”

“Yeah, but you know a woman’s work is never done.” She hesitated. “Jake, we never finished last night.”

He almost groaned. “I don’t know that I want to do this, Rebecca. Not now.” He didn’t want anything to spoil what they had between them.

“I know.” She pressed a hand to his chest and stroked. “I know it’s hard, Jake, but I’m almost finished with my first draft. I just need some additional information from you, then I can plug it in and turn in my story to Mr. Barker to review.”

With a sigh, Jake pulled himself up to a sitting position as well, tucking the sheet under his arms. “Okay, shoot. What else do you want to know?”

Rebecca was quiet for a moment, trying to put her thoughts in order. Somehow she figured this might be easier now, since she was actually close to him, touching him, able to offer some comfort.

“Jake, the night Jesse disappeared, do you remember anything odd or strange happening?”

“Hell, the whole thing was strange.” Jake sighed, wishing he didn’t have to go through this, but knowing he owed it to her, and to Tommy. “That night, when my parents came home, the police were already there. The nanny had called them. She claimed she’d
fallen asleep on the couch, and when she woke up, the front door was open and Jesse was gone.”

“They didn’t believe her?” Rebecca asked carefully, deliberately making her face blank, even though her insides were churning with fear once again.

“Would you?” he asked, turning to her. Rebecca shrugged. This was one part of the story she had no knowledge of; she had no idea what her mother had told the police. She herself had been sound asleep on a couch in the family room. That’s the last thing she remembered. She probably blocked the rest out.

“I…I don’t know.”

“Rebecca, come on, get serious. Do you honestly think if you were watching a kid someone could come into the house, snatch that kid, and you’d sleep through the whole thing?” Jake shook his head, realizing the tension was easing back into him. “Everyone thought she was somehow involved. But they could never prove anything.”

“Was she questioned?” Rebecca asked slowly. An icy chill rolled over her and she shivered unconsciously.

“Yes, actually,” Jake said, dropping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her close to keep her warm. “But they couldn’t get anything else out of her. They thought she might have been the one to write the ransom note, but they could never—”

“Ransom note?” Rebecca bolted upright, her gaze searching his. “Jake, what are you talking about? In all my interviews, all my research, no one has ever mentioned a ransom note.”

“That’s because the family didn’t want it made
public.” Jake sighed. He’d come this far, so he might as well tell her the whole story, to have it out once and for all. “The morning after Jesse disappeared, Tommy received a ransom note. The authorities believed it was written by a woman—”

“The nanny?” Rebecca all but whispered, shock nearly traumatizing her entire system.

“Yeah. But they could never prove it, so they had no choice but to let her go. They had no actual evidence against her, and as Tommy says, falling asleep isn’t a crime.”

“No. No, it isn’t.” Rebecca’s voice was unbearably soft, but her mind whirled. If her mother had indeed written the ransom note, then she
must
have had something to do with Jesse Ryan’s disappearance. At least had a part in it.

It was the confirmation Rebecca had been searching for her whole life. The damning evidence she had suspected, but could never find.

Her chest was so filled with pain, with shame, she felt certain it would simply explode, leaving nothing but her tattered remains behind.

All her life she had wanted to know the truth, and now it looked as if she’d found it.

But she wasn’t certain she could face it. Wasn’t certain she could accept that her mother had been responsible for so much pain to someone else, for endangering an innocent little boy, for crushing a family.

And for what purpose?