Without care (16 page)

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Authors: Kam Carr

Tags: #love, #youngadult, #younglove, #kamcarr

BOOK: Without care
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I roll my eyes.
He must have a sore ego. I don’t really mind, if he wants to go
around telling lies then he can knock himself out. She never
mentioned anything about the dance, should I bring it up? I bite
down on my lip. I would like to know that everyone is safe. I
swallow hard and finally ask my question.

 

“What happened
at the dance?’

 

“Oh yeah,” Ali
shrieks. “The men with guns – What happened to you?”

 

“I went out the
emergency exit. Well, Ayden dragged me out of there. Did anyone get
hurt?”

 

“No. No one
knows who they were looking for. After five minutes they left.
Security at school is now over the top. But yeah, it was very
scary.” She lets out a deep breath. “Ayden’s left.”

 

“He’s left?” I
try to sound surprised.

 

“Yeah. No one
has seen him since the dance. Gossip around the town is that the
men were for him. Becks is depressed, she thought her and Ayden
were getting serious. But I knew he only had a thing for you.”

 

Her words bring
a little smile to my lips. I do feel bad that I can’t tell her the
whole truth. No one knows about Ayden and why he was really in
Summerton. Once again my mind drifts back to my father and I feel
uneasy again.

 

I shake my head
and try to concentrate on my conversation with Ali. I need
something uplifting.

“How are things
with Travis?”

 

She lets out a
little girly giggle. “Very well” she coos down the phone. “I
introduced him to my family on Sunday and my dad was actually nice
to him.”

 

“Did your dad
talk about his boat?”

 

“Of course” she
snorts. “Why have you gone away?” She asks unexceptionally.

How do I
answer, what shell I answer with? I think quickly just as there is
a tap on the door and

Ayden enters.
“Jen, who are you talking to?”

 

“Who’s that?”
Ali yells surprised down the phone.

 

I look over at
Ayden and give him a little smile which he returns. “It’s my
cousin” I lie. “I’m just staying with family in Seattle. I’ll be
back in a few days. We can talk then, bye Ali.”

 

“Okay” she
sighs disappointedly. “I’m really missing you. Becks is driving mad
with her endless talk of Ayden. You better make sure you come
back…”

 

“I will” I
insist, just as soon as everything is sorted with my dad. I don’t
say that out loud and feel guilty that I have lied to my friend.
“Bye Ali” I don’t wait for her to reply and end the call. I stare
down at my phone. I still don’t feel any better.

 

“Who were you
talking to?”

 

“Ali” I sadly
reply. I want to cry now, I am fed up with crying. I seem to be
feeling every emotion possible. Why does my life have to be this
messy? I begin to think about my father again. I don’t know why he
acted so shocked when he saw me. This is my home, technically.
Surely I can come and go when I like.

 

Ayden sits down
next to me and places his arm around my shoulder. I feel we are
getting too close, but I enjoy being held by him. I am safe with
him and I trust him immensely. I rest my head against his chest and
take in his scent.

 

“I’ve found
something out” he says into my hair.

 

“And what’s
that?”

 

He pulls away
and I turn to face him. His brow is knotted together and he avoids
eye contact with him. “It’s Mel,”

 

“What about
Mel?”

 

He shakes his
head and I know it’s not good. “She’s in a relationship with Mario
Lopez.”

 

“What?” I
scream in shock. “She’s with my father, isn’t she?”

 

“I don’t think
so” Ayden replies. “I think she’s there to keep an eye on him and
is waiting for Mario’s money.”

 

“Which she
won’t get” I add, as I stare down at my hands.

 

“No. We need to
get your father on his own and talk to him. We need to know how
long Mel has been in the picture and what her involvement is.”

 

“Great” I roll
my eyes. “That isn’t going to happen. If she’s there to watch him
she isn’t going to let him out of her sight.” I throw my hands up
in frustration. “This isn’t going to work, is it? We’re not going
to get him to hand himself in.”

 

“I don’t know”
he shrugs, his voice a little edgy. “We need to come up with
another plan.”

“It’s a waste
of time.”

 

His dark eyes
glare at me and slowly narrow. “Don’t say that” he hisses, his
voice sends shivers down my spine. “We will do what we came here to
do. I promise.” His facial expression softens and he slowly leans
towards to me. “You can trust me.” With that his lips brush my
cheek, he stands up and walks towards the door. “Get some sleep. We
have a busy day tomorrow.” He steps out of the room and closes the
door.

 

I fling myself
back on the bed and stare up at the dark ceiling. My cheek tingles
from where he has just kissed and my blood is pumping through my
veins. I know deep down nothing will happen between us. Firstly, he
is too old for me and secondly, after this is over he will leave.
This is just his job.

 

I close my eyes
and try to sleep. All I can see is Ayden’s face and those dark eyes
which make me feel small and weak.

 

I think I am
slowly becoming crazy. Everything goes from one extreme to another.
Just a month ago my only problem was my mother and dealing with her
unacceptable behaviour. Now I know that was probably her way of
dealing with this stress and I under more why she never told me
anything.

 

Finally sleep
takes its grip of me, I have vivid dreams all about horrible
looking bad men, dark eyes and guns.

 

***

Morning comes
too quickly, as soon as my eyes open reality hits me straight away.
I climb out of bed and walk into the living room. Ayden is already
up and sat at the table going through some paper work. I take in
his profile and my stomach flips. I begin to wonder what will
happen after we accomplish our plan. The pain hurts too much to
even consider never seeing him again.

 

“Morning” he
smiles, looking up from what he is doing. “I thought I would take
you out for breakfast today.”

 

“What about
trying to talk to my father?”

 

“We have plenty
of time to do that” he adds.

 

“Morning folks”
Tucker greets us as he strolls into the living room dressed ready
for work. “Did we all sleep well?” He heads over to the kitchen and
begins to make himself a coffee. I begin to feel awkward standing
so decide to sit at the table with Ayden.

 

Its then I
notice a picture of my aunt standing beside that Marco man. His
arms are wrapped around her and she is smiling. I know that smile;
I get the same smile when I am with Ayden.

 

“You okay, Jen”
Ayden asks, noticing my eyes are fixated on that one piece of
paper. He quickly grabs it and flips it over. “Don’t worry, we will
sort this out.”

 

We sit in a
little café just a few minutes from Ayden’s place. I look down at
my waffles covered in syrup. I remember having this exact same
breakfast when I was younger. It was a highlight of weekend. Every
Saturday my father would take me out and I would drench my food in
golden syrup and it always remained a secret just between him and
me.

 

I grab my fork
and begin to push the food around my plate. It’s funny how a little
memory can make you feel bad. I always enjoyed being a daddy’s
girl. How your dreams and hope can be dashed so quickly. He is no
longer that man I was brought up to believe he was. There was never
anything decent about him, how could there be? He was good at lying
just like my Aunty.

 

How could she
do this to my mother? How could she do this to me? She should be on
our side not some low-life murderer. I really need to see my father
and I really think it would be better if I did it alone. I know
there is no way Ayden is going to allow that.

 

I look up from
my plate and over to him. He’s reading a newspaper while sipping
his coffee. I take in his perfect face, dark eyes and focus on his
lips. I remember how soft and how right they feel on mine.

 

I bet he will
be gone soon- Someone else who will leave me. My heart breaks a
little at the thought of never seeing him again.

 

He will have to
go soon, won’t he? After all this his job and I doubt he would give
it all up for me. In fact I wouldn’t want him to give it up for
me.

 

“What are you
thinking about?” He asks, stopping my thoughts in their tracks.

 

My cheeks flush
as I realize I haven’t taken my eyes off him. Really, how can I?
He’s perfect and I have deep feelings for him. I can’t have him, I
will never have him. He’s too old for me, he deserves more than
me.

 

“My father” I
lie, stabbing a waffle with my fork. “He would bring me to a place
like this when I was younger.” He puts his coffee down and gives me
all his attention. I carry on talking just so I no longer have to
think about a life without Ayden. “We would order a big stack of
waffles and drench them in syrup – Which my mum hated me to have.”
I give a little laugh. “It was always our little secret, but I
think she knew.”

 

“Must be nice
having nice memories?” His voice is off beat and he looks down at
the table. “I don’t remember ever doing anything with my father. I
had a grandmother, but after she died I was pretty much alone.”

 

My hand
instantly reaches out for his and with his free hand he places it
over mine. My eyes look at our intertwined hands. I love the way it
feels. He looks back at me and smiles. “We should really come up
with a plan.”

 

“I know” I say
off key as that fear soars through my body. “I just don’t think I
will be able to speak with him without getting angry.”

 

“You need to
block it out” he gives my hand a little squeeze. “It’s a basic
lesson I had to learn through training.”

 

“Have you ever
had a young client before?”

 

“Yes,” he stops
what he is saying and swallows hard. His dark eyes look over at me,
making me squirm in my seat. I feel the goose bumps popping up over
my bare arms and my stomach flips over. “I’ve never gotten attached
before.”

 

Attached
meaning joined, combined and together. We will never be together,
will we? I blink back my tears. I need some space. I pull my hand
out of his grip and stand up. “I need the bathroom” I lie, turning
and walking through to the back.

 

Once inside the
small confinements of the toilet I take in deep breaths. My heart
is pounding through my chest and my whole body is feeling on edge.
I try to drag in another breath, but my chest hurts too much. I
dash over to the sink and switch on the cold water. Quickly I
splash the water over my face hoping for relief, but nothing
happens.

 

I close my eyes
and concentrate on breathing. It slowly begins to work and my body
begins to feel stable again.

 

I have no idea
what I am going to do. The more I think about everything, the more
the doubts creep in. I feel betrayed by my whole entire family. My
mother- for keeping this from me.

My father- for
destroying my childhood and Mel for stabbing my mother in the
back.

 

I quickly open
my eyes as an idea creeps into my head. That’s it; I need to get my
father away from Mel somehow. I need to rescue him. A plan comes
together in my mind and a little smile hits my lips. Yes, that’s
it.

 

Although I
can’t get Ayden involved, my father won’t speak if he knows all
about Ayden. I have to do this alone and prove to everyone I’m no
longer a stupid kid. I’m 18, an adult in the eyes of the law.

 

I leave the
bathroom, feeling more upbeat and positive about the whole
situation. I look over at the table and see Ayden talking to some
woman. I freeze on the spot and just watch the scene being played
out before me. The woman is tall, thin and looks nothing but
glamorous. Her skinny jeans and heels enhance her long legs. The
silk cami top leaves nothing to the imagination and her long dark
hair rests neatly on her over exposed chest.

 

I watch as she
freely touches Ayden’s arm and flutters her eyelashes at him. Ayden
looks like he wants to run away, his arms are folded over his chest
and sits away from her. I take another look at the woman. Oh my
god, its Natalie, the woman from the party. He looks behind him and
at me, his eyes pleading for help. What should I do? It has to be
something bold, something that tells this woman he is off the
market.

 

She touches him
again which surges jealously through me. I don’t like other women
touching him. I smile back at him; I know exactly what I am going
to do. The one thing I have wanted to do since we’ve met and now I
have the perfect reason.

 

He raises an
eyebrow as if to say ‘help me, now!’ I smile back, pull back my
shoulders and take in a deep breath. With confidence I strut
towards him. I can’t believe I am about to do this, but it will be
fun to see the look on her face afterwards.

 

I stop when I
reach Ayden; his dark eyes look up at me. Completely ignoring that
we are in a room full of people, I straddled his lap and sit down.
My arms creep up his chest and wrap round his neck. One hand buries
it’s self into his hair and the other cups his face. I lean
forward, pressing my body against his.

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