Without You: Book 1 of the Changing Hearts Series (25 page)

“When is she giving you back your car keys?” Ariana said with a smile.
 

“After graduation next week. Riding the bus sucks. I’m literally the only senior on there.”
 

Mayra’s mom thought Jimmy and Mayra needed some time away from each other.
 

“Wow. Yeah, I don’t envy you. Those freshmen must be all over you, huh?”

Mayra made retching sounds, which made Ariana bend over laughing.
 

“Hey, so was that the first time your mom ever caught you sneaking out? Or should I say sneaking someone in? I just thought about that.”

“Yeah. Ruined my perfect record too.”

“I bet.” She lay back on her bed. She was starting to get kind of sleepy. Why did she always get sleepy early on Friday nights? She’d never understand that.

“So less than a week until graduation. Have you found a dress yet?” Mayra asked.
 

“Not yet. Doing some shopping tomorrow.”

“Maybe I can come with you. My mom was supposed to take me. You know, since I can’t drive, but turns out she has to cover some lady’s shift. And she needs the money since I’ll be starting college soon and the senior dues wiped the savings she’d started. The one good thing about community college is that it’s not too expensive, so we should be able to pay for it if I get a part-time job this summer.”

“That’s good. But yeah, you can come with.”

“Thanks. Just text me tomorrow,” Mayra said.

“So are you excited about graduation?” Ariana asked.

“Hells yeah,” Mayra replied. “I get my car back. I can go out. I can sleep in. No more homework or tests or projects.”

“I know,” she replied. “I can’t wait.”

“We can double date again.”

“If our parents let us,” she said. “Not sure they will now that there’s a conflict of interest.”

Mayra laughed. “We’ll figure it out. We always do. Not to mention we’ll both be eighteen and on the verge of going to college. I’ll be working. You’ll be getting ready to actually move out. They can’t tell us what to do anymore.”

“True.”

There was a brief silence as Ariana imagined summer and beyond.
 

“So have you and Lucas done it yet?”

Ariana scoffed and looked around.
 

“You have, haven’t you?”

“No,” she said a little too loud.

“Maybe you’re really telling the truth. Second base, minimum. Am I right?”

Ariana stuttered.

“I knew it!” Mayra said with a laugh.

“Mayra,” Ariana said with a smile. She shook her head. “What about you and Jimmy, huh? Not that I really want to know, but you two haven’t done it yet, right?”

“No way. Taking things slow, remember? Especially right now.”

“Good.”
 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mayra said with a laugh. “If we’re together long enough, it probably will happen, you know.”

“I know. Just give me more time to process that first. Not to mention you’ve only been going out—”

“Like over a month now.”

“Wow. Seems like longer.”

“Yep. You and Lucas are at like, what, seven months?”

“Almost.”

“Things are getting serious, huh?”

“Yep.” Ariana stared at her ceiling.
 

“Do you think you’re gonna do it soon? Like after graduation? I thought for sure you’d do it at prom."

“Nah. Too cliché.”

Mayra laughed. “God, prom sucked. Biggest waste of money, dress, and make up. Seriously, though, aren’t you running out of time?”

They laughed, but Ariana hesitated. “We’ve gotten close, but it’s still a little scary, so I think we’re going to wait.”

“Is Lucas a virgin too?”

Ariana fidgeted with the corner of the pillow case. “No.”

“Oh. Well, make sure he uses a condom. I don’t care if you’re on birth control. You never know.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Ariana replied.
 

“Don’t mean to be a downer over here, but do you think you guys will do it before you leave in August?”

“I don’t know. It just depends. If it feels right, you know? I’ve sent my confirmation letter, so there’s no doubt now that I’m going to UGA. I just want us to make the most of the time we have left.”

“But you two are doing long distance, right? You’re not just breaking up after summer’s over.”

“No. Never. It’s just gonna suck when I have to leave. Not seeing Lucas every day is going to kill me.”

###

“I missed you, mall cafeteria,” Jimmy said, his arms wide open like he wanted to give it a hug. They were at the mall.
 

He was still grounded, but her parents had agreed he could accompany Ariana and Lucas to the mall to hang out. Ever since the whole Jimmy/Mayra fiasco, they had been a bit stricter with her too. Jimmy still wasn’t allowed to see Mayra on his own, though.

The mall would be closing in a few hours, but Lucas was gonna be out soon. So they were going to grab something to eat and watch a movie. The theater was open late tonight, and her parents had given them permission since Jimmy was there too.

“I’m so hungry right now,” Jimmy said, looking around at all the tiny restaurants. “Where do y’all want to go?”

“I don’t know. Why don’t you find us a table while I go get Lucas? It won’t take me long.” She glanced at her phone for the time.

Jimmy nodded and they started walking in different directions.
 

She walked a minute and turned right to go into the clothing store Lucas worked in. He was walking out. He smiled as he walked in her direction.
 

“What’s up?” he asked as they went in for a hug.

“How was work?” They began walking back to the cafeteria hand in hand. His hand was soft but strong, and Ariana liked how he held onto her firmly.

“Work was work. Where’s Jimmy?” Lucas said.

“Getting us a table. So what movie do you want to watch?”

“I honestly don’t care as long as it’s not a chick flick. I’m thinking me and Jimmy would outvote you anyway.”

Ariana laughed. “Action it is. You hungry?”

“Starving,” replied.

“Another thing you two agree on.” Now Lucas laughed.

A few minutes later, they were contemplating what to get.
 

“I think I want a couple of burgers and a milkshake,” Jimmy said.
 

“I don’t know,” Lucas said staring at all the menus. “I could go for some egg rolls.”

“And I want pizza,” Ariana said. “I know. Let’s each go to where we want, and we’ll meet back here.” She began walking and the other two did the same without another glance.

She got in line at the pizza place. She was wondering what kind of pizza she wanted when she heard someone behind her call her name.

For a split second, she thought it was Lucas. Maybe he had changed his mind.
 

A split second after that, her heart skipped a beat when she realized she recognized the voice. It wasn’t Lucas.

Her breath caught, and she fought shivers as she turned around.
 

“Carlos.”

“How’ve you been?” he asked quietly. He was standing right behind her, not two feet from her. She looked up at him.
 

He looked different. Older.
 

And there was no smile on his face. But he smelled the same, his cologne bringing back memories.

“Fine and you?” she asked. She realized she had taken a step back.
 

Carlos glanced away, and Ariana didn’t know what to say.
 

She heard him exhale, and she realized she needed to take a breath.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about you and what I would say to you if…” he started. “And now that you’re here in front of me, I honestly don’t know what to say.”

He had a hand in each of his pockets.

She agreed with him. She still thought about him sometimes, wondered how his life had changed and where he might be.
 

“How is…everything?” she finally said.
 

He shrugged, shifting on his feet. “Do you regret…everything?”

Ariana’s mouth opened and closed again. What was she supposed to say to that? Her gut said yes. The last time she had talked to him…

“I thought so,” he said. “I know I’m not worth crap.”

“No,” she said. “I mean, you—you’ve gone through a lot. Neither of us were ready. We both did stupid things.”

He nodded.
 

She went on, her voice lowering. “We just weren’t right for each other.” This so wasn’t going how she thought they would if they ever saw each other again. “The way things ended, I just wish—”

Then Lucas was beside her, then in front of her.
 

“You okay?” he asked. He was looking at Carlos, but she knew he was talking to her.
 

“Yeah,” she managed, stepping to the side so she could see Carlos.

“What do you want?” Lucas asked Carlos.
 

Carlos gave a small laugh and turned around to leave.

Except Lucas grabbed his shoulder.

“Lucas, no—” she began.
 

“Get your hand off of me,” Carlos said. Lucas was slightly taller, but Carlos had a completely different look on his face from just seconds before. Their faces were inches from each other.

Rage was the only word that came to Ariana’s mind as she looked at Carlos’ expression.

She put her hand on Lucas’s arm. Then Jimmy was there. “Hey, what’s going on?” Ariana noticed people were staring. The entire cafeteria had gone quiet.

Jimmy looked at her, and she gave him a pleading look. Jimmy got in between Lucas and Carlos.
 

“Come on, man,” he said to Lucas. “Let’s go.”
 

Lucas and Carlos finally broke eye contact, and Carlos looked at Ariana one more time before leaving for good.
 

He bit his lip like he wanted to say something but couldn’t.
 

Lucas finally turned around and put his arm around Ariana. The chatter in the cafeteria resumed, with tons of whispers all around them.
 

“What was that about?” Jimmy asked as they stood in line with Ariana for the pizza.
 

Ariana looked at Lucas, and Lucas looked at her.
 

“We ran into each other,” she explained. She crossed her arms across her chest.

“Was he bothering you?” Lucas asked.

“No,” she replied. She tried to read the menu above her, but no matter how many times her eyes looked at the words, she couldn’t make out what she was reading.
 

It was finally her turn to order.

“What can I get for you?” the guy asked.
 

“Um, two slices of pepperoni, please, and a drink,” she said.
 

A few minutes later, they were walking back to their table.
 

“We’ll be right back, I guess,” Jimmy said, as he and Lucas awkwardly walked off to order their food.

A few minutes later, they sat down with their food.
 

“You okay?” Jimmy asked as he bit into one of his burgers.
 

She nodded and looked down at her pizza. She took a sip of her soda and tried to stop thinking about what Carlos had said.

And what he hadn’t been able to say.

###

Jimmy walked ahead of Ariana and Lucas. The movie was over, which meant Lucas was probably going to talk about Carlos.
 

No more dark room with a loud movie playing to distract them. And she hadn’t been able to get into it. She knew Lucas had noticed.
 

Probably Jimmy too since he was giving them their space. Which she didn’t want.
 

Lucas slowed the pace. So did she, but she kept her head down.
 

“Hey,” he said quietly. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” she said. He tried to stop in front of her, but she stepped around him and kept walking.
 

They had never gotten into an argument, and she didn’t want to start now.
 

“I know this is about him. Do you not like how I handled it?”

She sighed and looked back at him. “Kinda.”

Lucas looked around and back at her. “Sorry.”

“Don’t get mad. It’s just that I was handling it. He was only talking. He wasn’t trying to do anything.”

Lucas just looked at her, his brows furrowed.
 

“You’re not jealous or something, are you?” she asked.
 

“No. I just—it makes me sick thinking he might hurt you. I know what he did.”
 

“I know. But like I said, I was handling it. If I felt like I needed you, I would have let you know.” She wanted to kick herself. That did not come out like she planned.
 

“Sorry. I should have let you two—” Lucas let his hands fall to his side as he turned around.
 

“What?” she asked, walking towards him. She noticed a couple of people their age walk past and look at them. She tried not to think about them. “Lucas.”

“What?”

“Let’s just forget about it. Before we know it, I’m going to be gone, and we’re gonna wish we hadn’t wasted our time arguing over something so dumb.”

He took a deep breath. He turned around and hugged her. “I promise I’m not jealous. I just…don’t want to lose you. You deserve so much better than him. I know I’m not perfect, but I—I would do anything for you.”

“You are perfect,” she said quietly.

###

“How do you feel?” Jimmy asked her.
 

Ariana looked down at her black graduation gown. Her hair was in beachy waves and her makeup was done. She held her cap in her hand, with two tassels, one for honor roll. Underneath, she was wearing a form-fitting black dress with a v-neck and short sleeves. It was a few inches above her knee, and she rounded out the look with black pumps with a dash of sparkle.
 

She looked hot. Underneath the gown anyway. She couldn’t wait for Lucas to see her.
 

She wondered what Lucas looked like in a suit all dressed up.