A Family for Christmas (2 page)

 “Yes.
It’s a great ministry, and I really think they could use my experience.” He
shook his head and let out a long breath.

“So
what’s the problem?”

He
gave her a dry half-smile. “My problem is I don’t have a wife.”

She
gasped and straightened up, suddenly realizing what Daniel had seen they had in
common. “Seriously? So you’re having problems raising support?”

“No.
I’m rolling in support. I don’t even really need it, since I’ve got more than
enough income on my own.”

Lydia
tried very hard not to resent this leisurely declaration, when it was like
pulling teeth for her to get even the smallest of pledges.

He
continued, “The problem is the mission organization that runs the center. They
keep hesitating, since they’re not sure I’m in an appropriate ‘domestic
situation’ for the role of co-director.”

“They
really think you need to be married to do the work? I thought it was just women
who were blessed with those concerns.”

“I
think they’re okay with me being single. They’re not okay with me being a
single father.”

“Oh.”
She thought about that. “So you have custody of your daughter? What was her
name? Eleanor?”

“Yeah.
Ellie. I have full custody. This is evidently a problem.” He sounded almost
lazy, but she recognized a faint bitterness in his eyes, one that told her he
was just as frustrated with his situation as she was with hers.

“And
they don’t think, since you’re able to work out the care of your daughter here,
you’ll be able to handle it there too?”

“I
guess not. I’m not even going to be in India year-round. I’ll stay here for the
school year and then just go over there for the summers. I can make other short
trips during the year as needed and do a lot of the work virtually anyway. I’m
moving back to Willow Park so my folks can help out more in watching Ellie when
I have to make the shorter trips. But they’re not all convinced.”

She
gave him a sympathetic smile. “We’re kind of in reverse situations, then. My organization
is fine with me not being married, but I can’t raise the support I need because
the churches don’t think I should be gallivanting around the world when I could
be staying here and having babies.”

He
raised his eyebrows. “Is it really that bad? So what exactly would you be
doing?”

She
sighed. “Maybe I’m exaggerating. But I’m having a lot of trouble raising
support. I’d be working with the legal team. The organization does
investigation and provides legal assistance for under-aged girls in brothels,
trying to rescue them and then give them the help they need to get reoriented
afterwards. I can’t practice law there, of course, but I can work with the
Indian lawyers. There are laws in India against a lot of the sex
trafficking—the laws just aren’t always enforced.  Anyway, there’s really
important work to do, and I think I can help. But everyone’s worried that I
can’t do it for some reason, as an unmarried woman.”

“There
are plenty of single, professional women in India.”

“I
know. I’ve heard it justified so many ways it makes me want to scream, but not
very many churches want to support me.”

His
eyes were so dark a blue they almost looked violet, and they were sympathetic
at the moment as they gazed at her. “No wonder Daniel said we should talk.”

“Yeah.
If only we could somehow pool resources.” She gave a huff. “I need financial
support, which you have more than enough of. And you need…”

“A
wife.” The one word was drawled, as if in jest.

But,
after a pregnant pause, both of them stiffened. Their eyes flew up to meet in
an odd moment of complete understanding.

They
were basically strangers, but she knew—without doubt—that they’d both had the
same bizarre idea at the exact same time.

After
a minute, Gabe put down his coffee, which he’d been holding frozen halfway to
his mouth. “No, it’s crazy.”

“Yeah,”
she said, letting out a breath and feeling ridiculously deflated. For a moment,
it was like all of her prayers had been miraculously answered. “I guess so.”

His
shoulders slumped slightly too, as if he were feeling some of her
disappointment. “I mean, it might work in the short run, but what would happen
when you wanted to get married for real?”

“Oh,
I don’t. I don’t want to get married. All I’ve ever wanted to do is go to India
and do this. It actually would work perfectly for me.”

“Seriously?
You don’t want to get married?”

“It’s
not that I’m anti-marriage or anything. I’ve just never felt like I was called
to be married. Some people aren’t, you know.”

“I
know. I’m not married now either, of course. And, if it wasn’t for Ellie, I’d
be absolutely convinced my first marriage was a mistake.”

There
was that faint bitterness in his voice again and, this time, it prompted a
spark of hope. “Don’t you want to get married again?”

“No.”
He met her eyes evenly.

“Why
not?” It was too pushy, too intimate a question to ask a man she barely knew,
but they were having this conversation, and she needed to know. Some people
found her forthrightness surprising, but it was the way she lived her life. She
just didn’t have patience to fiddle around with a lot of niceties.

“I
don’t know if I can trust a woman again. Enough to be married to her. For real,
I mean.”

She
sucked in a sharp breath, the hope rising even more. “So, just to get it all on
the table, we’re talking about a marriage of convenience here, right?”

He
turned his head away briefly. “This is crazy.”

“I
know it’s crazy, but why shouldn’t it work? If you have a wife, you could take
on the co-director job. And if I had a husband who was called to missions work
in India too, then everyone wouldn’t balk at giving me money for support.”

“You
wouldn’t even need to raise as much,” he murmured. “They have an apartment in
Bangalore for me.”

“Wow,”
she breathed. “It’s like it’s meant to be.”

“Let’s
not get ahead of ourselves, though. Right now, you might be sure that you don’t
want to get married for real, but what happens if that changes?”

“Why
would you assume it’s going to change?”

“How
old are you?”

She
straightened her spine. “Twenty-seven. What does that have to do with
anything?”

“I’m
thirty-eight. I’ve already been married and have a daughter. We’re at different
places in life. I’d feel like I was taking advantage of you.”

She
bit back a surge of anger and made herself say calmly, “That’s condescending
and a little offensive. I’m an adult. I’m not your eighteen-year-old babysitter
anymore, and this is never going to work if you think about me as if I am. I
know what I want. I’m capable of making mature, reasoned decisions. And this is
the work I was put on this earth to do.”

“I’m
not trying to question your commitment or your certainty. But it feels like the
perfect solution to my life just fell in my lap with you, and I don’t want to
be selfish and jump at the chance if it’s not the right thing for you too.”

“It
is
the right thing for me.” She leaned forward and tried to convey her
surety through her words and her expression. “It feels like the perfect
solution to my life just fell in my lap too. There’s a reason that Daniel
wanted us to get together.”

“I
don’t think he had a marriage of convenience in mind.”

“Of
course not. But there’s a reason. Sometimes God works in inexplicable ways. Why
not a marriage of convenience?”

His
posture had relaxed, and he was almost smiling as he shook his head. “You know
this is insane, right?”

“Of
course, it is. But think how perfect. We could work out all the details of how
the marriage would work beforehand, so things wouldn’t be awkward. The only
thing that’s important to me is that we’re faithful to each other. I don’t
believe in taking marriage casually.”

“Me
either,” he said in a low voice. “I would be faithful.”

She
felt a strange sort of shiver at the words, but she didn’t know where it was
coming from, so she just ignored it. “Good. Me too. If we agree on that, then
there’s no reason we have to be in love to get married. We can set up the
arrangement in a way that works for both of us. If you’re not going to be in India
all year round, then there will be a lot of time when we won’t even be living
on the same continent. That should make things easier. I really think it could
work.”

“You’d
be okay with doing some sort of pre-nup? I need to think about Ellie and—”

“Of
course. We’d get everything squared away so there are no surprises.”

He
was smiling now too, and still looking faintly amused. “All right. If you’re
sure, then it definitely works for me.”

“Great.”
She was suddenly so excited she wanted to hug herself. It was like her entire
life was finally moving toward the end she’d been dreaming of. “Maybe I can
actually get out there by next summer.”

“That’s
when I’m hoping to go too.”

She
grinned at him. “See? It’s like it’s meant to be. Will your daughter be okay
with it?”

“Why
wouldn’t she?”

“I
don’t know. It will just be a surprise that you’re getting married.”

“Ellie’s
a smart girl. She’ll be fine.”

“Okay.
Good. Where are you living now, anyway?”

“Raleigh.
But I’ll be moving to Willow Park eventually. You’re back there, right?”

“Yeah.
I’m just living with my parents as I raise support. I could always move to
Raleigh for a while, if that would make things easier.”

“I’m
selling the house in Raleigh anyway, since it’s way too big to keep up if I’m
not in the States all year. I’ll just move up the timeline and move to Willow
Park over the next couple of months.”

“Okay.
Well, that would work well with me. It’s a really nice town. Ellie will
probably enjoy going to school there.”

“Yeah.
I hope so.”

“Are
you selling out your business then?”

“Not
entirely. But I’m stepping way back in terms of my role so I can focus on the
business center.”

“It’s
a lot of big changes,” she said, looking at the man across from her—handsome,
successful, reserved—and wondering if it was possible that she was going to get
married to him soon.

“I
know. But good ones. Ellie is getting older, so I need to be there for her
more, and there’s no flexibility in the role I had in my business before.
Besides, I just…”

“You
just what?” It was another nosy question, but Lydia had never been reticent
about asking what she wanted to know.

“I
want to do something different.”

She
wondered what had happened with his ex-wife, but she wasn’t quite comfortable
enough with him to ask about it.

Even
she had a few social boundaries.

“We
should probably be engaged for a month or two, or no one will believe the
relationship is real.”

“Yeah,”
he said. “And that will give us some time to change our minds, if we want to.”

“Maybe
we can get married before Christmas. That would give us plenty of time to plan
for getting to India over the summer.

“That
sounds like a good timeline.” He pulled out his phone and pulled up what was
evidently a calendar. “I’ve got commitments through October, so I can try to sell
the house by the end of next month.  We should probably start dating now, so
the engagement doesn’t come out of the blue, and then announce the engagement
at the first of November, when Ellie and I move back to Willow Park. Then get
married maybe December 6th?”

Lydia
pulled out her calendar and checked it too, feeling rather amused at planning
out the schedule for their marriage-of-convenience. “Works for me. That gives
us plenty of time to make sure we’re able to get along and such. If you end up
being a jerk, then I might have to back out.”

He
chuckled. “Same here.”

“Good.
I think this might actually work.”

“All
right then. I guess we have a deal” He gave her that half-amused, half-bitter
smile and stretched out his hand across the table. “It’s on, then?”

She
shook his hand, feeling a rush of excitement at how smoothly, easily, perfectly
things had worked out.

This
was definitely a gift from God.

She
said, “This marriage is on.”

A month later, Lydia sat
on a leather loveseat next to Gabe and tried to look comfortable.

They
were in Daniel’s office in the church, and it was the first session of their
pre-marital counseling, since Daniel wouldn’t marry couples who didn’t go
through at least three sessions of counseling first.

But
talking about a marriage of convenience in front of her hometown pastor—whom
she’d known all her life—wasn’t exactly the most comfortable thing to do.

And
there were still twenty minutes left to go.

She
stared down at her hands, still finding it strange that there was an engagement
ring on her left hand. It was simple—gold with a diamond solitaire—but it
looked really expensive to Lydia. Much more expensive than anything she was
used to wearing.

Gabe
had given it to her a couple of weeks ago, in a romantic gesture that consisted
of thrusting the box at her and saying, “Here. You might wear this.”

“Look,”
Daniel said, tugging at his brown hair the way he did whenever he was thinking
hard, “I’m not judging you or anything. Everyone has different reasons for
getting married. Just be honest about what the reasons are.”

Lydia
glanced over at Gabe, trying to get a cue from him about how open they should
be about this situation. They hadn’t told Daniel why they were getting married,
but he must have realized something was up.

For
the last month, they’d gotten together every weekend—since they were supposed
to be dating. Twice, she’d driven down to Raleigh, and twice Gabe had driven up
to Willow Park. He didn’t feel like a stranger to her anymore, and her first
impression of his being a decent guy had been affirmed on every trip.

She
understood the look in his eyes when he met her gaze, and she gave a little nod
in response.

He
cleared his throat. “Both Lydia and I are practical people. This marriage makes
sense for us in every way we’ve considered—right now and for the future. We
both really want it.”

“We
do,” Lydia added, just so it was clear Gabe wasn’t putting words in her mouth.
“I know it might seem a little strange to you—since you’re so head-over-heels
in love with Jessica—but we both really want it. We’re committed to making it
work.”

A
strange expression flickered across Daniel’s face for just a few seconds before
it returned to his characteristic thoughtful observation. “I had no idea what I
was getting into when I married Jessica. And I love her so much more now than I
did even a year ago. You know, the Bible tells us to love the person we’re
married to. It never tells us to marry the person we love. I don’t look for
desperate passion in couples, since that’s a pretty flimsy foundation for a
lifelong commitment. I need to know that the couple is equally committed to
their faith and the church, which I know you both are. And I need to know
they’re both entering the marriage with a clear understanding and a commitment
to each other.”

“We
are,” Lydia said, leaning forward, feeling better because Daniel hadn’t thrown
them out of his office in disgust when they’d admitted that the marriage was at
least partly practical. “We’re committed to this marriage. We’re committed to
each other.”

Daniel
shifted his eyes over to Gabe, who nodded.

“We’re
committed,” he said.

“You
can trust Lydia’s commitment, despite what happened with Michaela?” Daniel
asked him.

Michaela
was Gabe’s first wife. He hadn’t told Lydia much about her, except she’d walked
out on him five years ago and only sporadically wanted to see Ellie.

Gabe
shifted in his seat just slightly. “Yes. They’re two entirely different
things.”

It
sounded like he meant it, and Lydia could basically understand why. He’d told
her he couldn’t trust another woman with his heart, but he wasn’t asking for
Lydia’s heart.

He
could trust Lydia’s reasoned decision. Her heart wasn’t relevant to him at all.

It
made her feel strange—just a little pang of regret—but it faded almost
immediately. This was better. Easier. Simpler. And it would finally get her to
her calling in life.

“Why
is it different?” Daniel asked.

“Michaela
and I were infatuated kids. Lydia and I are adults who know what we’re doing.”

“Okay,”
Daniel said, after a minute of watching Gabe closely. “I can’t see any reason
why you shouldn’t get married. I’ll be happy to marry you.”

Lydia
let out a breath, and she felt Gabe relax slightly too. They could easily have
gone to the courthouse to get married or found another pastor to officiate, but
they’d both been raised in this church. If they were going to get married, they
wanted it to be here.

“So
next time,” Daniel said, glancing over a sheet of paper on his desk, “I need
you both to write out expectations you have for the marriage.”

“Expectations?”
Lydia tried not to frown, but she hadn’t been expecting homework.

“Yes,”
he said, his mouth twitching slightly as he looked at her. “Expectations. I
have a list of things here for you to address.”

“Okay,”
Lydia murmured, hoping it wasn’t a very long list. Everything was going
smoothly here. She was happier than she’d been in a year, since it looked like
her plans were finally coming to fruition.

But
she didn’t want to spend all kinds of time thinking about a marriage that was
purely practical.

“You’ll
want to write these down,” Daniel prompted.

Gabe
pulled out his phone to take notes on, with a dry, slanted glance at Lydia, as
if he were questioning this too. And Lydia found an old receipt in her purse
she could jot the list down on.

“Okay.
So, for next time, write out your expectations for the marriage regarding the
following,” Daniel said. “Work—for both of you. Spiritual life. Money. Raising
Ellie. Household duties. Handling disagreements. Sex.”

Lydia
jerked in surprise. Unfortunately, she was pretty sure that Gabe could feel it.
She was okay with writing down how she thought they should divvy up household
chores, but she was not too happy about writing out her expectations for sex.

Her
expectations were that they weren’t going to have sex.

“Write
it down,” Daniel prompted, evidently noticing that she’d paused. “There’s more.
Recreation—and by that I mean things like date nights and family time and
vacations.”

Lydia
kept writing out the list as Daniel continued, but she was intensely aware of
Gabe sitting beside her.

In
a matter of weeks, the man was going to be her husband,

It
was a very strange kind of thing to process.

***

Gabe’s parents had been
watching Ellie as she played on the church playground equipment during their
counseling session, and from there Gabe and Lydia were going to take her to the
new house.

Gabe
paused, however, in the hallway of the church after they left Daniel’s office.
“So what did you think?” he asked, studying her face closely.

She
shrugged, trying to look casual, since she didn’t want him to think that she
was flustered by some of what had been discussed. “It was fine. I think it went
fine.”

“Good.”

He
wasn’t much of a talker. She was learning that about him. She figured it was a
good thing, since guys who had to be the center of attention all the time drove
her crazy.

“I
didn’t realize we were going to have homework though,” she added, keeping her
voice down so Daniel wouldn’t hear.

“Yeah.”
Gabe started walking again, putting a casual hand on her back to get her to
fall in step with him. “We should go through our answers before next week, so
we’re on the same page about all that.”

“I
think we were supposed to write the answers out separately, so we can see where
our expectations differ.”

“I
know. But I’m not about to talk through differing expectations about money and
sex when Daniel is in the room.”

“Oh.”
She swallowed hard, feeling her face grow a little hot at the idea. She was a
normal woman and had all the normal biological urges for sex, but she’d intentionally
not focused on them. For a long time, she’d been so determined to pursue her plans
for the future that she just hadn’t had time to worry about it. In addition, she’d
worked with enough women who’d been sexually abused that she was under no
romantic delusions about sex.

Under
the right circumstances, sex was very likely a nice thing to do, but it wasn’t
as important—or as fulfilling—as making a difference in the world.

“Good
point. Although some of that should be pretty easy. Right?” She lowered her voice
to a hush, so much so that he had to step forward—very close to her—to hear. “I
mean, we aren’t going to have sex, are we?”

“Not
if you don’t want to.” He’d ducked his head slightly, still looking her in the
eye.

She
was suddenly breathless—overly warm and overly conscious of his big body in
front of her. “You weren’t expecting to, were you? I mean, this is purely
practical, isn’t it?”

“It
is. I’d be perfectly willing to make sex part of the arrangement, but it’s not
a deal-breaker either way.”

She
swallowed hard and closed her fingers since they were shaking slightly. “You
were thinking we might have sex?”

He
seemed very quiet and intense at the moment, so she was surprised when a little
smile quirked on the corner of his lips. “I didn’t know what you were
expecting. As I said, I’m fine either way. You didn’t think I’d say no if you
were going to offer sex, did you?”

Torn
between embarrassment and amusement, Lydia lowered her eyes. “I hadn’t thought
about it. Sex would complicate things, wouldn’t it?”

“Why
would it?”

She
looked back up and was suddenly imagining those sexy, blue, heavy-lidded eyes
looking at her from the pillow beside her. Her whole body tightened, and she
had to look away. “I don’t know. It just seems like sex has the potential to
make things kind of…messy. I think it would be easier and simpler if we just
don’t.”

“Okay.
That’s fine with me. But you can change your mind any time you want. It’s a
standing offer.”

She
gulped and took a breath, telling herself she was a grown woman who had a lot
more important things going on than turning into a puddle of goo over the idea
of sex with her husband-of-convenience.

“Okay,”
she said. She suddenly realized that, at some point, she must have raised one
of her hands to put on his chest. It was pressed against his shirt, just over
his heart. He felt real, solid, beneath her palm.

She
pulled it away quickly. “Okay. We’ll say no to sex for now, leaving open the
possibility of that changing. It’s probably a good idea to go over the other
stuff, so the discussion doesn’t get awkward at the next session. Good
thinking.”

“I
do think well occasionally,” he murmured, slanting her another amused look.

For
such a reserved man, he had a really good sense of humor.

She
liked that about him.

She
was hiding a smile when they walked out the back door to the fenced-off part of
the grounds that held the playground equipment.

Ellie
wasn’t playing on the playground. She was reading a book on a bench, while her
grandparents sat on another bench.

Lydia
didn’t feel like she’d gotten to know the girl very well, since Ellie was
evidently as quiet as her dad. But she’d always been perfectly polite whenever
Lydia had spent time with her and Gabe, so Lydia assumed the girl would warm up
as time went on.

After
all, if Gabe and Ellie were going to be in the States during the school year,
then it wasn’t like Lydia would be around her full-time.

When
Ellie glanced up and saw her father, she jumped up and ran over to him, her
dark hair flying out behind her.

She
grabbed Gabe in a hug, which he returned, as if they’d been parted for days
rather than less than an hour.

“Were
you reading the whole time,” he asked, stroking the girl’s long hair.

“No.”
She pulled away and stared up at her father soberly. “I talked to Grandma and
Grandpa some.”

“Good.
Are you ready to go check out our new house?” he asked.

“Yes.”
Ellie was darting looks up at Lydia as she talked, but she didn’t smile.

Lydia
smiled at her, thinking it was sweet that the girl and Gabe were so close. It
made sense, since her mother had abandoned her so early.

“Everything
okay?” Gabe asked, turning to his parents, who had gotten up from the bench and
were approaching more slowly.

“Oh,
yes,” his mother said, smiling kindly at both of them. “How did the session
go?”

“It
was—” Gabe broke off when his phone rang. After he glanced at it, he said, “I’m
sorry. I better take this.”

He
walked over to the other side of the yard as he picked up.