A Family to Come Home To (Saddle Falls) (8 page)

“Thank you,” she said softly.

“You’re welcome.” He stepped back, dropping his arms to his sides. “Now, I came in here to rustle up something cool for Tommy and I to drink. Think you might be able to help me out with that?”

“Absolutely.” Turning out of his arms, she reached over her head to open a cabinet and remove two glasses, deciding to ignore how shaken she was. “Tommy usually likes a glass of cold lemonade in the afternoon.” She headed toward the fridge and pulled out the icy-cold pitcher of pink lemonade she’d just made. “If you’ll hand me that tray sitting on the shelf up there.” She pointed and he managed to reach it without the step stool she kept handy for just such occasions. She set the glasses and the pitcher on the tray, then scooted by Jesse to grab some white napkins from the counter before setting those on the tray as well.

“Would you like a snack or anything, Jesse? Are you hungry?”

He laughed, then shook his head as he took the tray from her. “No, darlin’, but thanks for the offer.” He cocked his head. “Are you really as good a cook as Tommy claims?”

“Absolutely,” she said proudly, slipping her hands into her apron pockets. “And I’m sure during the next few days you can judge for yourself.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” he said, lifting the tray and heading toward the door.

“Jesse?”

“Yes, darlin’, I know,” he said with a chuckle. “Mind my step or you’ll be measuring my head with one of your frying pans.”

“Count on it,” she said firmly, trying not to grin.

He stopped before going out the door. “And darlin’, you remember I said we would drop the subject.
For the moment.
” He hesitated. “That doesn’t mean we’re not gonna pick it up again sometime soon.”

The moment the back door closed behind him, Hannah gripped the counter tightly and pressed a hand to her heart, trying to gather her composure.

So many thoughts, feelings and emotions were rampaging through her, jumbling together in a confusing mix that had her more off base than she’d been in years.

She simply couldn’t understand her physical or emotional reaction to Jesse. Granted, she knew now he wasn’t the same Jesse she’d known as a child. He was a man now. A grown man. The kind of man that would make any woman’s head spin.

She shouldn’t allow herself to react to him like some silly, besotted schoolgirl. It was annoying and…exhilarating, she had to admit with a secret smile. It had been so long since she’d felt so alive simply because of a man’s touch, his look, his smile, or even his kiss. So it was hard not to let caution go by the wayside and allow herself to just enjoy the feelings.

Hannah frowned, pushing another loose pin back in her hair. On the other hand, she knew better than to allow herself to be guided by her emotions. She knew better than anyone the consequences of letting them overrule her intellect and common sense.

And there was a lot more at stake here than just her own feelings. She was flirting with disaster, and she knew it. Jesse wasn’t staying. He couldn’t have been more clear about that. So why on earth would she allow herself to let her feelings get involved?

She couldn’t and wouldn’t, she told herself firmly, resolving to get a grip on herself.

Hannah lifted her head and glanced out the window. She couldn’t help but smile at the joy on Tommy’s face. She couldn’t ever remember seeing that look in his eyes, and she knew Jesse was the reason.

But how was Tommy going to feel when he learned he’d found his grandson only to lose him again? Not by someone else’s hand this time, but by Jesse’s own rejection of his grandfather and his family.

Tommy was going to be devastated and she simply couldn’t bear to see him hurt. She knew firsthand what it felt like to have your own family reject you, and she would do anything in her power to save Tommy or any of the Ryans from such a fate. It was a devastation that etched deep scars in your heart, scars that never fully healed.

Tommy had done so much for her and Riley, surely she could think of something to help repay him.

Her gaze shifted to Jesse and her heart tumbled over in spite of her own cautions. A thought began bubbling in her mind and she felt her spirits slowly lift.

She didn’t have much time, but maybe, just maybe, she could show Jesse—teach Jesse—the importance of family.
His
family. She frowned suddenly, remembering another man she’d tried to teach the importance and value of family.

Hannah sighed, realizing regretfully that her own wounds still hadn’t healed. Riley’s father’s deception and betrayal had left her so deeply wounded, so deeply disillusioned, that she wasn’t certain she could ever trust another man who didn’t or couldn’t see the value and importance of family. Nor could she ever allow herself to fall in love with a man like that.

Like Jesse, she thought sadly.

But maybe it wasn’t that Jesse didn’t value family, maybe it was just that since he’s never really had a family—at least not one he could remember—he didn’t fully realize how wonderful being a part of a large, loving family could be.

Excited at the thought, Hannah’s mind began to spin. Maybe if she could find a way to get Jesse to realize just how important family was, then he would realize that he belonged with
his
family. Right here in Saddle Falls.

Pushing away from the counter, Hannah decided it was certainly worth a try. She glanced out the window. At this point, she had nothing to lose.

And if it worked, she would have given Tommy the one thing—the only thing he’d ever really wanted—the return of his grandson to the family home and fold.

Just as Tommy had always given her the one thing she’d always needed and wanted—a family. A place where she belonged.

It was definitely worth a try.

“S
o, what do you think?” Hannah asked nervously as she put the finishing touches on the platter of prime rib she was preparing to carry into the dining room. Dinner was almost ready. Everyone had finally come home. Jake and his wife Rebecca who lived in a small carriage house behind the main ranch house. Josh and Emma who lived next door in the house Emma had inherited from her dad—while they built a new home of their own on the Ryan property. And Jared and his wife Natalie, who, along with their children lived in the main ranch house with Tommy.

The Ryan women had insisted on pitching in and helping to get dinner on the table, much to Hannah’s relief. But then again, they never treated her like the help. Instead, they’d always included her and treated her like family.

Jake’s wife, Rebecca, Jared’s wife, Natalie, and Josh’s wife, Emma, were just finishing setting the enormous dining-room table as well as a smaller table in the corner for the children.

With a wicked grin, Jesse leaned his hip against the kitchen counter, his gaze still on the Ryan women bustling around in the dining room. He glanced at Hannah, amused by the way her gaze had been following him all day. It felt kind of nice to know she was watching him. Although he wished it was out of personal interest rather than a desire to make sure he wasn’t doing anything that would require her to grab one of her frying pans.

“Well, darlin’, what I think is that the Ryan men certainly have great taste in women.” He shook his head, his eyes twinkling in amusement. “They’re all lookers, every one of them.”

“True,” she admitted, realizing he was both teasing her and trying to avoid the issue. Hannah swatted him with the pot holder she had in her hand, making him chuckle. Warmed from all the heat in the kitchen, she pushed back several loose strands of hair with the back of her hand and let her gaze meet his. “But that’s not what I meant and you know it. How did it go with your brothers?”

Jesse shifted nervously, shifting his gaze to the living room where a football game was on and all the Ryan men—his brothers—were hooting and hollering and engaging in some good-natured arguing over what team was going to win.

He’d been sitting in there with them, enjoying the game, comfortable in spite of the circumstances. Almost by silent agreement, when everyone had returned to the house, men, wives, kids and dogs, no one had discussed anything heavy or asked any questions.

They’d merely greeted him with a handshake or a hug, sometimes both, and then basically let him be. And he appreciated that they were giving him time to adjust, time to feel comfortable. But Tommy had told him earlier during the day when they’d been sitting out on the patio that he’d asked everyone in the family to just let things develop at their own pace. Especially this first day.

And Jesse sorely appreciated it since he was still trying to struggle through all the emotions inside of him.

Including the emotions Hannah and her kiss had aroused.

When he realized that he’d rather be spending the few remaining minutes until dinner in the kitchen with Hannah he’d wandered in here.

“Things went as well as can be expected, I guess,” he said with a shrug, turning back to Hannah and taking the heavy platter of meat from her hands. “This is too heavy for you to be lifting, Hannah,” he said quietly. He’d been watching her all afternoon as well, finding excuses to go into the kitchen just so he could be with her. He’d been struck by how hard she worked.

But growing up with a single mother, Jesse knew how hard single mothers, especially those dedicated to their children, like Grace Garland and Hannah
had
to work. It was a complex juggling act. But still, he wondered and worried how Hannah did it. She had her job here, which was obviously very time-consuming and demanding, not to mention caring for Riley and that run-down monstrosity of a house they lived in. When he first came back into the kitchen, he’d realized just how frazzled Hannah looked from working all day.

“Let me carry this for you.” Before she could protest, he started into the dining room. Hannah followed, knowing he was deliberately avoiding her question and the subject of his brothers. Why, she wasn’t certain. But it made her nerves squeal in silent alarm since she’d been stuck in the kitchen when everyone came home, and she had no idea how that initial meeting had fared.

“Where would you like this?” Jesse asked, earning smiles from the assembled helpers.

“Just set it right in the middle of the table, Jesse,” Hannah instructed as Emma reached across the table and moved the large, fresh floral arrangement Hannah had made for the celebratory dinner. Slender and petite, she had a cap of dark hair and large eyes that made her look fragile and delicate—but Emma was anything but.

“It looks fabulous, Hannah,” Rebecca said with an envious sigh. She took a deep whiff, then pushed her long hair off her face. Rebecca still looked like the investigative reporter—pregnant or not. “And everything smells terrific.”

“Thanks.” In spite of the fact that she was used to compliments on her cooking, Hannah flushed with pride and pleasure.

“I keep telling Jake that I’m going to learn to cook—”

“Threatening me again, sweetheart?” Jake called from the living room where he was sprawled deep in a chair with his baby daughter, Molly, nestled in his lap, sound asleep.

“No, Jake, just trying to expand my interests.” Rebecca glanced at Jesse, feeling the need to explain. “My…uh…culinary expertise begins and ends with boiling hot dogs.” She frowned a bit. “And of course, macaroni and cheese—the kind in the box,” she hurriedly clarified with a laugh and a shrug. “Thank goodness I have a sister-in-law who owns a diner.” She glanced affectionately at Emma, then at Hannah. “And Hannah for everything else. Otherwise Jake and I would probably starve.”

“I didn’t marry you for your cooking skills, sweet heart,” Jake called, turning his head to wink at Jesse. “Trust me, bro, she has other more interesting…skills.”

“Jake!” Appalled and embarrassed, Rebecca glared at her husband. “There are children here,” she reminded him primly. “Including your own daughter.”

“See what I mean?” Smiling at Jesse, Jake wiggled his eyebrows, amused by his wife’s embarrassment.

“I reckon I do,” Jesse said with a laugh, realizing he was enjoying the camaraderie as well as the company. With a grin, Jesse glanced at Rebecca. He’d liked her immediately, and the enormous love between her and Jake was obvious.

“You’re almost as bad as he is,” Rebecca accused with a roll of her eyes, making Jesse chuckle.

“Well then, darlin’, guess that just means I’m falling behind.” Still grinning, he slipped his hands in his pockets and sent Jake a wink. “Guess I’ll have to work a bit harder, to catch up then.”

“Men!” Rebecca said, aiming a napkin at Jesse, who ducked just in time.

“Hey, babe, the Ryan men stick together,” Jake called back. His gaze met Jesse’s and for a moment the two brothers, the oldest and the youngest, stared at each other, a silent message of understanding passing between them. Jesse felt something much stronger, deeper, pass through him, moving his heart in a way that left him shaken.

“You’re all hopeless,” Rebecca said with a laugh, earning a nod of agreement from her fellow Ryan females.

“Uncle Jesse’s not hopeless,” Riley defended indignantly, wrapping her arms around Jesse’s leg and glancing up at him adoringly. “He’s wonderful.”

Chuckling softly, Jesse reached down and scooped Riley up in his arms. “Well now, darlin’, thank you for defending my honor.” He planted a loud, smacking kiss on her cheek and Riley snuggled closer. “I think you’re wonderful too.”

“See what I mean,” Rebecca declared with a smile of pretend disgust, encompassing the rest of the women with a glance. “Five minutes and every female in the house adores him.” She shook her head, then lifted her hands in supplication. “What on earth are we going to do with them?”

“Well, darlin’,” Jesse said, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes as his gaze met Jake’s and he saw the approval there, “I reckon between us we could uh…think of a few interesting things.” Still holding Riley in his arms, Jesse turned toward Hannah. Their eyes met, held, and she couldn’t help but think of the interesting kiss they’d shared. She flushed bright red and averted her gaze to the table. “Yes indeed,” Jesse said with a wink to Rebecca. “
Very
interesting things.”

“Time to eat,” Hannah all but groaned, anxious to be out from under Jesse’s knowing gaze and charming smile.

Dinner at the Ryan household was always chaotic at best. On a night when the whole family had gathered, it was more like a three-ring circus, with kids spilling, giggling and teasing.

Adults passed overflowing platters of food back and forth, chattering one over the other, laughing and enjoying the company as well as the meal.

And through it all, Tommy Ryan sat at the head of the table, beaming at his family, totally content.

“’Tis a glorious night for a celebration,” he finally said when dinner had been completed and Hannah’s decadent chocolate mousse cake had been oohed and aahed over and devoured.

Now, as coffee was passed and after-dinner drinks poured, Tommy wanted a moment to savor this night, this dinner. And his family.

He lifted his brandy snifter, then let his gaze travel around the table. His heart warmed and swelled until he felt for certain it would burst from the joy filling it to nearly overflowing.

He cleared his throat to get everyone’s attention. The din softened but didn’t silence until he picked up his knife and tapped it gently against the delicate snifter he held in his hand. The room quieted instantly and all eyes turned to him.

“The entire Ryan clan is gathered together tonight for the first time in twenty years.” Pride had him swallowing the lump that had clogged his throat as he let his gaze shift around the table. “And what better time for a toast?”

“To my eldest grandson, Jake.” He smiled as a rumble of laughter worked around the table. “Aye, I must admit you were always a rebel and a hellion, truth be told. And you gave me more than your fair share of worry.” Tommy’s own chuckle mixed with everyone else’s. “More so than all your brothers combined. But I’m pleased to say you’ve grown into a fine, fine man, Jake. Tamed, of course, by the right woman.” Tommy tipped his glass in salute toward Rebecca, who blew him a kiss in return. “And I’m proud of you, Jake. Very proud. You and Rebecca have given me a beautiful granddaughter, a lass who I’m certain, with the true luck of the Irish, will grow up to give you back all the worry that you gave to me.” Amidst laughter, Tommy lifted his glass, as did everyone else, and took a sip of his brandy before continuing.

“Then there’s Jared.” The murmurs were as quiet and subdued as the man himself. Tommy shook his head. “Aye, son, you were always more like your father than any of your brothers.” Tommy’s voice had softened a bit at the mention of his long-deceased son, the pain still raw after all these years. “Looking at you, lad, why, it’s like looking at your father when he was a young man. All quiet strength and solemn responsibility. You worried me some, too, if the truth be told—”

“Me?” Jared said in surprise, ignoring the laughter that rippled around the table. As the second oldest, Jared had the same dark hair and enormous Ryan blue eyes but he was much more serious and subdued than his brothers.

“Aye, lad, you,” Tommy admitted with a twinkle in his eyes. “You were far too serious for your own good. Your love of the land—Ryan land—made me worry that you’d never find it in your heart to love anything else.” Tommy’s gaze shifted to Natalie, Jared’s wife who reached for her husband’s hand under the table. With her long ebony hair and slender figure, it was hard to believe she was the mother of four. “But, aye, like your oldest brother, you were fortunate to have the love of a good woman to help you see the light, to show you there was more to life than…cow patties.” Laughter swelled again and Tommy paused, waiting for it to quiet down. “And you’re well on your way to having a full-scale clan of your own.” Grinning, Tommy tipped his glass to the corner of the dining room where four bassinets, two holding Jared’s infant twin sons, were lined up and where a small table had been set for the children.

The table was empty.

Timmy and Terry, Jared and Natalie’s oldest set of twin boys were too busy trying to feed gumdrops to the dogs, Ruth and Ditka,
under
the table to notice that all eyes were on them.

Tommy chuckled as he returned his attention to Jared once again. “And lad, I couldn’t be prouder.” Lifting his glass, Tommy took a sip, then added. “May you be blessed with a dozen more sons, lad, twins all of them.”

At Jared’s groan, everyone laughed as Tommy continued.

“Now then there’s Josh,” Tommy said with a deliberately heavy sigh, making everyone chuckle again. “Aye, with your fancy business and law degrees, you’ve always had a head for business and you’ve secured the Ryans’ future—all the Ryans—” Tommy inserted, letting his gaze encompass everyone, adult and child alike. “For all of our futures.” Bringing his gaze back to Josh, Tommy grinned. “And lad, I couldn’t be prouder.” Tommy shook his head. “But aye, along with that head for business, lad, you also had an eye…for the ladies.” Josh grinned until his wife, Emma, gave him a delicate poke with her elbow. It was a rare day when Josh, who was the spitting image of his brothers, wasn’t dressed in his usual businessman’s suit—and today was one of those days making Josh look less like a tycoon and more human and approachable. “You gave me a spot of worry, too, lad, wondering if the only thing you’d every let claim your heart was the next deal.” Fingering his glass of brandy, Tommy glanced up at Emma, then grinned broadly, love shining in his eyes. “But, like your brothers, you’re no fool. You knew a good woman—the right woman—when you saw her—”

“Yeah, even if it did almost take a steamroller to hit him before he realized it,” Jake said, resting his arm over the back of his chair as he winked at Emma and then grinned at his brother Josh.