A Life Less Broken (7 page)

Waking up
today is torture. My entire body is achy; my throat feels like I’m swallowing
razor blades, and I think I have a fever.

I can’t move
without pain shooting through every part of me.

I can hear
Dominic knocking downstairs but I can’t force myself to get out of bed and let
him in. I reach for my phone but the moment my hand comes out from under the
blanket, a rippling cold chill washes over my body.

My teeth are
chattering so hard I can hear them, and I’m shaking with the cold.

Just as I
grasp the phone in my hand, Dominic calls me.

“He-he-hello,”
I stutter through the shivers.

“Allyn, open
the fucking door. What’s happening?” He sounds so worried and stressed.

“Si-sick, go
aw-away,” I try and say.

“Not likely,
come and open the door now.”

“N-n-nooo,
too si-si-sick.” I just can’t get warm no matter how much I ball myself up.

“Open the
damn door, Allyn or I’ll call the police and get them to beat it down.”

“Fi-fi-fine.”

I drag myself
downstairs and let Dominic in. The moment he is in through the door, he
immediately puts his palm against my forehead and looks into my eyes.

“Have you
got Tylenol?”

“K-k-kitchen,”
I say as I wrap my arms around myself.

“Do you want
me to carry you up to bed?”

I shake my
head as I start back upstairs toward my room.

“I’ll be up
in a moment with some Tylenol.”

Slowly, I
make my way back into bed, pulling all the blankets up around my chin.

I hear his
heavy footsteps on the stairs.

“Here you
go,” Dominic says, handing me two tablets to take with a glass of water.

DOMINIC

She’s
shivering and she’s so pale.

I sit on the
edge of her bed as she swallows the two tablets and hands me back the water
with most of the contents still in it.

“I’m going
to make you some soup, and if that fever doesn’t come down I’m taking you to
the hospital.”

Her eyes fly
open and she’s furiously shaking her head. “I ca-ca-can’t…”

“If it’s for
your health, you can and you will.”

“N-n-n-noooooo,”
she wails through chattering teeth.

“Allyn, I
can’t leave you here like this.”

“I’ll ca-ca-ca-call
m-my m-m-mom-m.”

“I’m here
now and I’ll look after you. But if I have to, I’ll take you to the hospital
myself.”

She’s still
shaking her head, but if the time comes and she’s not getting better, then I’ll
do what I must to ensure her safety.

“I’m going
down to make you something to eat. I want you to try and sleep, okay?”

She nods and
curls further into herself.

“Allyn, you
can’t have all these blankets on you. I need to take them off so your body
cools down a little. Your fever’s too high.” She makes a pained mewling sound,
but allows me to take all the blankets off her.

She’s
wearing little sleep shorts, socks, and a tank top. Her legs have got scars all
over them and her top is riding up so I can see her flat stomach. There are
scars and bite marks all over it. I pull her socks off and her feet feel like
an inferno.

“Don’t cover
yourself up, okay? Let your body cool down.”

“Hmmm,” she moans
as she turns over.

The thing
I’m most worried about is pneumonia setting in. I’ll stay with her and monitor
her, and if I don’t think she’s improving I’ll definitely take her to the emergency
room. But being a doctor has its advantages, too.

I go
downstairs and call Lauren.

“Hi, Dom.
Everything okay?” Lauren asks.

“No, Allyn
is quite ill. I need you to call the pharmacy and get an antibiotic shot and a
pack of penicillin ready for me. Tell them I’ll bring the prescription by when
you bring me the medicine. I need you to bring my stethoscope and medical bag
too.”

“I’ll call
Charlie down at the drug store, that old dog owes me a favor.” She laughs. “I’ll
be over soon with all of it.”

“Thank you,
Lauren.”

I go into
the kitchen and start opening all the cupboards. There’s not much here. Maybe her
parents are due to bring her groceries, but either way there’s definitely not
enough here to make soup for Allyn.

I look
through her fridge and find even less. But I hit jackpot in her freezer. She has
some frozen home-cooked meals, two of which are labelled ‘chicken soup’.

I take one
out and start defrosting it in the microwave.

As I’m
waiting for it I hear a huge thump from upstairs.

I run up the
stairs, taking them two at a time until I’m in Allyn’s room. She must have
rolled and fallen out of bed because she’s in a fetal position on the floor.

“Allyn,” I
try and wake her.

“Hmmm,” she
murmurs.

“Can you get
up?”

“Hmmm.”

I easily
scoop her up in my arms and place her back on the bed. Her body is sweaty, her
damp hair is all over her face, and her jaw is chattering from the fever.

I push her
hair back from her face, and when I smooth it away from her cheek she leans
into my touch. It’s just the smallest of movements, but she definitely leans
into my hand. She lets out a soft purr as she moves against me and accepts my
warmth.

Fuck.

What’s going
on?

What does
all this mean?

Fuck.

I move away
from her and retreat to the door, leaning up against the jamb to watch her.

The
microwave’s been beeping for a few minutes, indicating that the defrost cycle
has finished, so I go back downstairs to see if the soup’s ready for Allyn.
Stirring it around, there are still some frozen lumps left in it, so I put it
back in the microwave to finish defrosting.

I hear
someone at the door, and assume that it’s Lauren. I open it and Lauren greets me
with a huge smile and a white paper bag containing the antibiotic syringe and
the penicillin tablets.

“Charlie
said to take your time, but I brought your pad over so you can write the
prescription out and I’ll take it to him on my way back to work.”

“Thank you
for doing this, Lauren. She’s pretty bad, but if I can get the medication and
some food into her, maybe she won’t need to go to the hospital. You’ll need to
cancel the rest of my appointments today.”

Lauren walks
into the house and looks around from the foyer. “Not to worry, Dom.  I already
did that when you called me.”

The
microwave sounds and I look toward the kitchen.

“It’s
chicken soup; she needs to eat.” I answer Lauren’s inquisitive eyebrows.

Lauren
follows me to the kitchen as I head back to get the soup out of the microwave.

“I know it’s
not my business, Dom, but what are you doing?”

“I’m helping
a patient.”

“Is that
what you’re telling yourself?”

“I am.”
Aren’t
I?

“Chelsea is
barely out of your life. I think you need to go out and have a bit of fun
before you get serious about someone again. I mean, you don’t fuck around, you
don’t ‘play the field’ as you young kids say, you don’t drink, you don’t smoke,
you barely do anything except come to work and occasionally go out for dinner with
that cute brother of yours.”

“Lauren, I’m
turning thirty-nine this year. I don’t want to party, I don’t want to go out, and
I don’t want any flings.”

“Not to be
harsh, but I doubt she’ll be able to give you much of anything,” Lauren says as
she points upstairs to where she assumes Allyn is. “She’s so badly broken,
Dom.”

“I don’t
expect anything from her. I’m merely her psychiatrist.”

“Okay, Dom.
I’ll let you think that until your mind catches up and you finally realize what
you’re doing.”

I look at
her and tilt my head to the side.

“There’s
nothing to realize.”

“Okay.” She
backs away and holds her hands up, palms facing me. “Well, can you write the
prescriptions out so I can go torment Charlie? It’s so much fun to screw with
his head. I may even let him take me to dinner, if he’s a good a boy,” she says
and laughs a small, evil giggle.

I write the
prescription and Lauren happily takes it and moves toward the front door.

“Take good care
of her, Dom.”

“I will,” I
answer her honestly.

I let Lauren
out of the front door and lock it, then take the stethoscope and the antibiotic
syringe upstairs to check on Allyn. I need to examine her to determine if she needs
antibiotics or this is just a cold from being out in the rain.

“Allyn,” I
say gently, trying to rouse her from her sleep.

“Ummm,” she
answers as she turns toward me.

“I need to
listen to your lungs, so I need to touch you with the stethoscope.”

“Okay,” she
murmurs and turns away so her back is to me.

I should be
putting the stethoscope directly on her skin, but I don’t think she’s ready for
that. Instead, I place it over the thin material on her back and listen to her
lungs as she breathes. There’s a slight rattle, which tells me she’ll soon have
an infection if I don’t intervene.

“Allyn, I
need to put the stethoscope on your chest too. Can you turn around so I can
listen, please?”

“Okay,” she
mumbles and moves so she’s lying on her back.

I put the
stethoscope on her chest and she flinches in her stupor. “It’s just me, Allyn. I’m
listening to your lungs. I’m going to move the stethoscope to a different
position,” I say as I smooth her hair again, trying to reassure her that I’m
not going to hurt her.

“Alright,
I’m tired.” She falls into a light sleep as I listen to her chest.

There’s a
definite slight rattle, and I need to give her the antibiotics so she doesn’t
end up with pneumonia. I don’t think she needs the injection, the tablets
should be enough.

I go
downstairs to check on the soup.  When I return upstairs, I bring the penicillin
with me. She’s still lying in the same position I left her in.

“Allyn,” I
softly call her.

“Yeah.”

“Can you sit
up for me? I’ve got something for you to eat so you can take some medicine.”

“I don’t
have medicine,” she says, groggy.

“No, but I
got you some. Can you sit up, or do you need help?”

“I’m okay.”
She shuffles a little and sits up in bed. Her eyes are bloodshot and her skin
is pasty and almost transparent.

I sit on the
bed and she reaches for the soup.

“Nope,
doctor’s orders.” I wink at her and lift the spoon to feed her.

“I can do
it.” Her objection is weak.

“I didn’t
say you couldn’t. What I said is that I’ll look after you – doctor’s orders.” I
hold another spoonful of soup up to her lips and she smiles faintly before
accepting my offering.

“I’m sorry
you’re stuck here. I’ll call Mom to come help me,” she mumbles.

“Allyn, I’m
here because I want to be. Now can you eat some more soup so you can take your
medicine? It’s not good to take it on an empty stomach.”

She has
three more spoonfuls of soup then yawns. I bring my hand up to her forehead and
I can tell the fever is coming down.

“I don’t
want anymore.” She starts to slide down the bed so she can go back to sleep.

“Sorry, you can’t
sleep yet. You need to take these pills.” I pop two penicillin tablets out of
the pack and pass them to her. When she has them in hand, I pass her the bottle
of water that sits on the table beside the bed, unscrewing the lid first.

She pops the
pills in her mouth and swallows them with a gulp of water before lying down.

“Dominic,
thank you for being here,” she whispers before closing her eyes and falling
into an instant sleep.

I move to sit
on the chair near the bedroom window and look outside.

Allyn’s
trust in me is beyond anything I could ever have expected at this stage. She has
allowed me into her home while she remained in bed, completely vulnerable.  She
ate from a spoon that I held and she took medication from me without
questioning what it was.

She may not
know it yet, but she’s begun to embrace her healing with open arms.

My gaze goes
to the lovely blue sky outside and I think about the promise of a happy future
for Allyn.

Just then a blue
jay lands on the window sill and looks inside.

What an intense
and incredible color.