Aftermath (26 page)

When the road curved, I knew I was close to the farm where Julia Kensington lived.

Huh? Who was Julia?

“Slow down.” Lucas raised his voice. “Just pull over. I’ll drive.”

“No. It’s my car. I’m not letting you drive my car.” I took the hill a little too fast and felt my stomach lurch, as the car reached the crest and swept down the other side. The shocks absorbed most of the sway, but my insides took a second or two to readjust. It was the same feeling I got on the rollercoasters at Six Flags.

Oh! Six Flags. I went there with Melissa and my friends back home. Matt.

I missed Matt.

I slowed the car down and tried to focus. My eyelids were heavy.

“What’s gotten into you?” Lucas asked. I felt the tension between us as if his eyes were boring into the side of my head.

“I don’t know,” I whispered.

“You’re baked. Did you have some of those brownies?”

“Those gourmet brownies your mother got from the bakery? They were soooo gooooood. Almost better than my… my… my mom’s.” I caught myself and swallowed the lump in my throat. I didn’t want to cry in front of him.

Wait. Baked? What did he say?

“You’re totally high!” he chuckled. “That’s awesome.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“Just what I said. Turn here. You can’t go home like that. My dad’ll fucking kill me. I’m already in enough trouble without getting blamed for this, too. Turn right.”

“Huh?” I turned where he told me and then again, past a house that looked familiar on a road marked, Dead End. “Hey, does Drew live back there?” He nodded. “Where are we going?”

“Just park over there.”

“Where? There?” I asked, pointing to a small opening between the bushes on the wooded hillside. Taking my hand off the steering wheel wasn’t a good idea. The car suddenly had a mind of its own.

“Here!” Lucas’s tone turned irritated. He mumbled something under his breath before he grabbed the wheel. I panicked. “Pull
around
the tree. Then no one will see your car.”

The gravel path was covered in leaves, with grasses and weeds taking over the crushed, thinning stones. I stopped beside the tree, but after Lucas looked around, he told me to inch forward. When he seemed pleased, I shut off the engine and he got out.

He was on my side with the door open before I had the seatbelt unlatched.

I was stoned.

And I liked it.

Why didn’t I do this before?

Lucas reached for my hand and helped me out of the car. He didn’t step back to give me space, though I wasn’t uncomfortable being this close either. His lips were touching mine before I knew it. I should have seen it coming. He closed the already-small gap between us, and I leaned back against the doorframe. I tasted his breath in my mouth and felt winded when he stepped back.

“Come on,” he said. I followed him down the gravel path that was probably a driveway in another life. I touched my fingers to my lips. His kiss was different from Matt’s, or any other kiss I ever had. My lips tingled. Maybe it was me.

The last house on the dead-end road looked vacant. We walked up the leaf-filled driveway to a dark brown two-story with white trim. An image flashed across my mind.

“It used to be white,” I said.

“What?”

Huh? “Never mind.” I shook my head and wiped my forehead with the back of my hand. Where did that come from?

I tagged behind him as he went around the house to a section of bushes under an empty window flower box. He knelt down, stuck his hand under a patch of leaves, and pulled out a small, metal box containing a house key.

“Whose house is this?” I whispered after he unlocked the side door and let us in.

“My grandpa’s.”

I nodded and walked around. The kitchen counters were bare. Sheets covered furniture in the small living room that faced the lake. The stairs were to the left, I thought, and turned to confirm their presence. I was overwhelmed with a déjà vu feeling. I couldn’t understand why.

“How long has your grandfather been…?” I started, but he cut me off.

“He’s not dead. He’s in a home.” He glared at me for a second and walked to the kitchen.

“Ooohhh…. This is
Neal’s
… dad’s… house.” I knew Neal’s dad was in a home. Aunt Barb told me that.

Lucas ignored me and opened the bottom drawer beside the stove. He pulled out two plastic red cups and a bottle of whiskey. “Want some?” he asked, though he poured a cup and drank it back before waiting for my reply.

I shook my head. “I don’t think so.”

“You’re probably right. You’re already stoned,” he said and smiled.

Was not. Oh, yeah. I was.

“If I knew you wanted to party this afternoon, I would have had a brownie.” He opened the cabinet below the sink and knelt on the floor. Reaching inside, he pulled out a small baggie and pipe with duct tape on it.

“I wasn’t planning to party today,” I mumbled.

He stood up and walked closer to me. I giggled.

“You probably need to sober up before we see my dad.”

“Huh,” I grunted.

“Or I need to get high too,” he said and chuckled.

I raised my eyebrows, almost hoping he would. I hadn’t felt this great since before Dad died. He sat on the counter, opened the bag, packed the dried, leafy contents in a small pipe, and lit it with a lighter.

I watched in fascination. There were a few football players back home that smoked pot, but I never watched them, or joined in, for that matter.

He inhaled, and I smelled the sweet aroma. He handed it to me without a word, and I mimicked what he did. Taking a deep breath, I choked. My throat felt constricted, and I coughed. He laughed. Tears formed in my eyes. After I caught my breath, he coached me. “Hold it in for a second,” he said the next time I tried.

“I’m not feeling anything,” I told him. He didn’t answer.

He had pretty eyes. Not dreamy like Ben’s, but pretty.

I giggled. Boys weren’t supposed to be pretty.

“Yeah, we can’t go home for a while,” he said and took a hit.

“Oh-my-god. My aunt’ll be so pissed. When are we going home, anyway?”

“I dunno. It’s early.”

“Where’s my phone?” I panicked and patted my pockets until I felt where I left it. Checking the time was difficult. The numbers blurred even though I held it in my hand sturdy.

He slid off the counter and put his arm around my waist when I started to sway. Despite the chuckle brewing inside me, I welcomed his kiss. I put my hand on his chest, and he pulled me closer. I tasted marijuana mixed with whiskey on his tongue. His hands roamed my back, and I found myself walking backward until we reached the couch in the living room.

I felt woozy and floating. Things moved in slow motion. Lucas leaned me back on the sofa and kissed my neck. When his lips found mind, they were more gentle. He stopped and looked at me. “Will you go to homecoming with me?”

I nodded, my heart pounding in my chest. “Ye-yes.” My voice cracked.

He kissed me again, and his hands wandered from my side to my chest. I didn’t care. I was fully clothed. His fingers soon found bare skin when he lifted the edge of my shirt. He rested his hand on my stomach, as his lips wandered to my neck. I wondered what I should do now. The gentle tickle was relaxing. I didn’t want the sensation to stop and eagerly kissed him back when our lips met again. His hand wandered upward, sneaking under my bra until it reached my breast. I tingled at his touch.

This wasn’t like me, but it felt good.

I should stop him. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Deep down, I wasn’t sure I wanted to stop. It was the first time in weeks I didn’t feel the pain of loss. I felt accepted.

His fingers scanned the waistband of my jeans as if teasing what he planned next. I definitely wasn’t ready for that. My reactions were slow. I tried to reach for his hand. Instead, he pulled mine toward him, placing my palm on the bulge in his pants.

I jumped when my phone buzzed, signaling a text message. Lucas barely noticed. When his phone vibrated in his pocket, I giggled.

“Wait,” I said, pulling away. This was moving way too fast for me. My words stopped him like disconnecting a lamp from its power source. “I can’t do this.”

He sat up, cleared his throat. “Okay.”

My phone buzzed again and his vibrated, almost at the same time. His eyes were somber as he answered the call.

“Hey… yeah.” He cleared his throat again. “Just hanging out. What’s up?” He glanced at me. “Yeah, okay. I’ll be there. See ya.” When he ended the call, he said, “Drew’s having people over. Let’s go.”

“To Drew’s?”

He nodded.

“Right now?”

His eyes widened, as he nodded again. “Unless you want to stay?”

“No… do you have a bathroom here?” I headed toward the kitchen as if I knew where it was.

“Yeah. Turn right,” he answered from the living room. “Hey, Em? I’m gonna call my dad and back out of dinner.” His words were muffled behind the closed bathroom door.

I straightened my hair, wiped the smeared eyeliner from under my eyes, and put on a fresh coat of lip gloss. Suddenly, I wanted to go home. 

My phone buzzed again, as Lucas locked the house. It reminded me that I hadn’t checked it the times before. Melissa’s picture popped up on the screen, notifying me of her incoming text. I couldn’t read the words very clearly, so I couldn’t reply.

“How long does this last?” I asked.

“What?” He looked at me after he hid the key amongst the plants. “Your high?”

I nodded.

“I dunno… I’m fine… You’re not?”

I shook my head and walked beside him down the driveway.

“Don’t worry. I’m sure it will wear off.”

“You’re
sure
?” I questioned. “Wha’ does that mean?”

“Nothin’… I mean… I don’t know… I’m not sure what’s in the brownies.”

I glared at him.

He chuckled. “Well, not exactly. Don’t worry. You’ll be fine.”

Great.

We walked in the middle of the road in silence, past where I parked my car. A patch of dense trees blocked the view of the lake.

“So what did you tell your dad?” I asked.

“That Drew was having people over, and you and I were stopping there for pizza.”

“And?”

“And what? He’s fine with it… We’ll do dinner another night, I guess.”

Halfway to the corner, partially hidden behind thick brush, was another driveway. “Who lives here?” I asked as we walked by a house between Lucas’ grandfather and Drew’s. It was a single-story cottage with similar siding to the Crandon house with white-and-red shutters.

“No one.”

I shot him a look.

“It’s been empty since I can remember.”

“Really?” I was surprised and even more shocked as my feet carried me toward the house in a light jog.

“Where are you going?” he called when I was already there. My right eye twitched, but I swore a light flickered in the window. I shouldn’t be doing this. Should I?

“Are you sure it’s empty?” I yelled.

He nodded and waved me back. I ignored him.

I peered into the window and jumped when my phone vibrated. Texts buzzed. Calls vibrated.

“Hi Aunt Barb,” I said, answering the phone.

“Just checking you and Lucas are skipping dinner with us. Right?” she asked.

“Oh… Yes... Sorry. I should’ve called. Ah… Drew’s having people over… I guess they’re ordering pizza.”

“You’re not there yet?”

“Um... No… Just walking up to the house,” I lied.

“Okay,” she said, hesitating before speaking again. “Did Melissa reach you? She called here.”

“No. Well, yes. I guess. She just sent me a text but you called, so I didn’t read it yet. Why? Is something wrong?”

“No, not at all… Okay, honey… Well, I’ll see you later, then… I love you.”

“Me too,” I said and ended the call. Guilt ran through me. At least I didn’t need to go home. I wondered what Melissa wanted if she called my aunt.

Lucas looked impatient and motioned me back. “Come on. We’re free for the night.”

“Okay, okay,” I mumbled, joining him in the road. I scanned the list of text messages as I walked, but I found myself swaying into Lucas. He grabbed my phone and put it in his pocket.

“Give it back!” I attempted an evil look, and then laughed.

He grinned. “Come get it, if you want.” He raised his hands above his head, tempting me to dig in his pockets. I smiled but didn’t take him up on it.

“Fine. Have it your way.”

He grabbed my hand, as we reached Drew’s front door. Lucas let us in without knocking, pulling me along, hand in hand.

I heard Drew’s voice first. “You made it!” he said and gave Lucas a high five.

“Emma,” Drew said. “Look who’s here.”