Almost A Spinster (2 page)

“Yes, we are.” He laughed, though the humor of this situation was fading along with the shock. “Once we believe a woman’s heart belongs to us, we think it should stay with us forever, even if we no longer pursue it.”

She cocked her head. “I don’t understand.”

He sat down in a chair beside the fire and looked up at her, watching her every move. “The same is true for our desire for the unattainable. What we never knew we desired, we come to crave when it is possessed by another. If you can harness those things, you could have any man falling at your feet.” He grasped his forgotten drink from the side table and took a swig. “Perhaps even David.”

Her mouth thinned as she took her own place in the settee across from him and looked at him appraisingly. “I think I take your meaning. If I make David-”

“Or the other eligible men of our society,” he interrupted.

She frowned. “If I make them believe that I am desired by another, it will attract their interest.” She pondered that for a moment, rolling the concept around in her head. The soft brown of her gaze snared his, enflaming desire he tried to conceal by shifting his position. “But is that really true? Women are pursued by men every day, they become engaged season after season, but they are not suddenly set upon by new suitors dying for their hand.”

He cleared his throat. “They would be if they captured the attention of a much-sought after gentleman. One no lady has ever been able to tame. If a lady did that, she would become a diamond of the
ton
. And if she later threw that gentleman over and it was clear he mourned the loss of her affection, then she would be turning away offers from suitors within the month.”

Her eyes widened as the truth of his statement became clear. For the first time since she stormed into the room and demanded his help, hope flickered in her stare. The thought that he had put such emotion there swelled his chest with pride.

“Let us assume this is true,” she said, pressing a finger to her full bottom lip. The action drew Wesley’s attention there and his own lips burned with a desire to kiss her. One he ignored with difficulty. “It isn’t as if the kind of gentleman you describe is around every corner, or that he would allow me to use him in such a fashion. Why would he do so? It would only tarnish his reputation.”

His thoughts drifted to his own life. “He would only go along if pretending to fall in love and become engaged would suit his own purposes or bring him some benefit.”

“Such as?”

Were his hands actually trembling? He fisted them in his lap. “You have met my grandmother, yes?”

Slowly, she nodded, but this apparent change of subject clearly confused her. “Lady Stanton. I met her when I first came out in society. She was very kind to me.”

“Then perhaps you have heard she has taken ill.” The very act of saying the words brought him enormous pain. Emotion he shoved away.

She dipped her head. “Yes. My mother mentioned it. I am sorry, Wes. Is it serious?”

“I’m afraid so.” He thought of how frail his grandmother had been the last time he came to her. “The doctors say it is a matter of weeks before she will be taken from us.”

Jane was on her feet in an instant and took a step toward him. When she placed her hand on his to comfort him, her warmth seeped into his blood and spread throughout his body. Both giving him the comfort she had meant and desire he doubted she would understand.

“Oh, Wesley!”

“She has lived a good life,” he said and at least he knew that was true. “She raised me after my parents were killed and loved me as deeply as any mother could her son.”

“I didn’t know,” she murmured and her grip on his hand tightened.

He got to his feet and pulled away before he did something rash like drag her into his lap and kiss her until she couldn’t breathe. “During the last year or so, she has often expressed to me her desire to see me settled before she dies.”

She smiled softly. “Of course, she would want to know you were loved, taken care of, before she left this world.”

He started at her keen observation. “I-I suppose,” he stammered. He met her gaze evenly. “And
that
is exactly the kind of reason a ‘well-documented rake’ would play along with a courting charade like the one I described to you.”

For a moment, her face was still, but then his statement seemed to sink in and her eyes grew impossibly wide and bright with emotion. She swallowed hard and stammered, “W-Wesley?”

“Pretend to court with me, Jane. If we can convince the
ton
, convince the world that you have tamed me, then we may both receive what we desire. I will give the woman who raised me her dying wish. And you will become the most sought after woman in society.” He watched her mouth drop open in shock and reached out to take both her hands in his. “Jane, will you pretend to fall madly in love with me?”

Chapter Two

Jane opened her mouth, but could find no words. Even if she had, there wasn’t breath enough in her lungs to say them. A false courtship with Wesley Hughes, Lord Stanton, one of the biggest rakes in London… not to mention one of her best friends? It was ludicrous. Ridiculous.

So why was a little thrill pulsing through her bloodstream? One that felt both out of place… and yet natural. And why was that thrill accompanied by a strange heat low in her belly? Not unpleasant, but entirely unsettling. Something that made her blush when she dared to meet Wesley’s eyes.

He hadn’t moved since he proposed his false courtship. He stood before her, watching her with those keen green eyes, as sharp as a hawk’s. They saw everything. And right now they were focused entirely on her. Delving into her soul, into secret places she hadn’t known existed. Places that stirred as she realized he continued to hold her trembling hand in his.

She pulled back out of instinct. It was only nervous shock at his offer that had her so out of sorts. Certainly there was no other reason. No purpose to becoming a complete ninny around one of her closest friends. Especially since she had been in love with David for nearly two years.

“Jane?” he said softly. His voice strummed over her emotions like a harpsichordist’s fingers and the vibrations echoed through her every nerve ending. “Do you understand what I’m asking you?”

She pursed her lips. “Of course I understand, Wesley.”

But somehow that felt like a lie. There were undercurrents all around that she wasn’t sure she fully comprehended. Tensions which hadn’t made themselves clear before tonight. Had they always been there?

“Do you intend to answer me?” he asked with a gravelly chuckle.

She covered her hot cheeks with icy fingers. How
could
she answer him? He was asking her to pretend to be in love with him. He was asking her to lie to the world. To lie to herself. Between this unexpected offer and David’s engagement to Madeline, her evening was spiraling out of control.

She hesitated. David and Madeline. For some reason she hadn’t thought about them since Wesley’s suggestion. The pain of David’s rejection was muted by Wesley’s shocking words.

“Wes,” she began, still unsure of what to say. What to do. “I-I-”

He moved closer, shrinking the world with that one step. Suddenly the room felt warm and the walls seemed to close in around her. She watched as his hand lifted, came toward her… and finally, finally, brushed her cheek. Tingling shocks of awareness blasted through her, taking her breath a second time.

“It isn’t a trick question, Jane,” he said with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I am asking you if you will help me. And in return I’ill help you. I’m asking you to spend a few scant weeks as the center of the
ton
’s attention. To spin around ballrooms as my partner. To walk with me. Laugh with me. Make everyone believe that we are falling in love.” He leaned a bit closer. “You will begin to hurt my feelings if you keep staring at me as if I’ve asked you to declare your undying allegiance to Napoleon.”

Jane blinked as she lost herself in Wesley’s eyes a second time. There were little mossy flecks of brown in the curtain of green. Why hadn’t she noticed them before?

With a start, she realized she wanted to say yes. Not to the false proposal, but to the ballroom spinning and the walking and the laughing… to the dream of falling in love and having that love returned.

Jane started, pulling away as she spun to the parlor door. Her best friend, Felicity Ellis, was standing just inside the door. Felicity’s blue eyes widened as they flitted from Jane to Wesley and back again.

“Felicity,” Jane gasped, clutching a trembling fist over her heart. “You startled me.”

One of her friend’s auburn brows arched. “Apparently you were deep in conversation. Good evening, Lord Stanton.”

Wesley smiled, but the expression was forced. Jane felt him look at her, his eyes filled with frustration and questions and… something else. “Good evening, Lady Felicity. You are looking very well this evening.”

Her friend’s pale cheeks darkened with a pink blush. “Thank you, my lord.”

Jane watched as Wesley stepped forward, his strained smile replaced by something warmer. More friendly and real. And flirtatious. Her heart leapt and for the first time ever, she wished her best friend weren’t so very pretty. And charming. And blessed with a family with more sense than Jane’s own. Felicity had a fortune for her dowry. She never need face the rejection Jane did… or worry about her future.

“I have heard rumors that your father is planning a gathering Wednesday next,” Wes was saying, though his words seemed far away to Jane’s ringing ears. “And that you will please the crowd with your beautiful pianoforte playing.”

Felicity’s blush deepened. She loved music and hoped to be accomplished at playing it. Clearly, Wes knew that fact. Jane’s chest burned with emotions, ones she hardly understood.

“I only hope not to embarrass myself,” Felicity laughed. “If I please the crowd, I will count the evening a glorious success.”

Wes gave a sure nod. “Then so it shall be. I heard you play two years ago and it was enchanting. Certainly, time will have only improved your talent.”

Her friend’s smile grew. “Perhaps my father will invite you and you will be able to judge that yourself.”

“Felicity,” Jane said, surprised at the rasping break in her voice and the jerky quality to her movements as she stepped forward.

Her friend turned from Wesley and her eyes went wide when she looked at Jane. She took a long step forward, grabbing Jane’s arm. “Jane, are you well? You are very pale.”

She nodded, glancing at Wes even as she tried to formulate a reply to her friend. He was watching her, concern plain in his expression, all flirtatiousness he’d exchanged with Felicity gone.

“It has been a tiring evening,” Jane admitted, casting her glance away from him. It was ridiculous how emotionally she had reacted to him earlier. And how difficult it was to watch him with her friend. He was known as a rake, a rogue. Why was she been surprised by him proving that? Certainly she had seen him flirt with young ladies before.

But never after asking her to court, even in an imaginary courtship, with him.

“Of course it has,” Felicity soothed, pulling her closer. “I’m sorry, I was being entirely insensitive and forgot why I came looking for you. My mother has taken ill with a headache and would like to retire. Since you…” She hesitated. “Since you had your own trials this evening, I thought you might like to depart early with us.”

Jane looked at her friend and any petty, unexpected jealousy she felt toward her faded. Felicity had always been loyal and kind to her. After her father’s public humiliation a few years before, Jane had seen many of her ‘friends’ turn away. But Felicity and her family remained true. Felicity’s presence insured Jane was rarely given the cut direct. And if she was… her friend was the one who made sure she didn’t creep away in humiliation.

“Thank you,” Jane whispered. “It has been a trying and-and…” Peeking over her shoulder, she caught Wesley’s eye. “And unexpected evening. I would very much like to leave with you.”

“Very good.” Felicity smiled, sad and kind at the same time, then turned to Wesley. “I hope you do not mind if I steal her away, Lord Stanton.”

Wesley did not look at her friend, but instead his mossy stare snared her own. Held her captive so she couldn’t have turned away even if she wanted to.

“Of course not,” he answered with a proper bow.

Felicity took Jane’s arm and guided her toward the door. Jane followed her friend’s lead, uncertain she could do anything else. Her mind spun with everything she had experienced… everything she felt in the past hour. David’s engagement. Wesley’s offer. Her own strange, inexplicable reaction to his words, his touch, his flirtation with her closest friend.

She stared at him, seeing Wes in an entirely different light. Slowly, she nodded. “I will think of nothing else, my lord. Good evening.”

#

“Lord Stanton to see you, my lady.”

Jane’s fingers curled around the spine of her book and her breath left her lungs in an instant. She sat up a bit straighter, forcing herself to speak when all she wanted to do was hide.

“Tell him I will receive him.”

Her butler nodded as he slipped out to fetch Wesley. She took the opportunity to straighten her gown, run a hand over her hair and try to force some level of calm when that was the last thing she felt.

Somehow she had hoped the distance of a night would help her conquer her fluttering stomach, her confusion about Wesley’s offer. It had not. Instead, she tossed and turned in her bed, tormented by dreams she could not fully recall. The morning light brought no further peace. Since she rose, she had watched both the clock and the door, waiting for him to make his promised appearance… and hoping she would know what to say and do when he did.