Beautiful Burn (17 page)

“
I
know. I swear, I know. It won’t happen again. We’ll do better.
And it’s not like they’re monitoring every email anyway, right?”

“
Auburn…someone
nearly caught us with my cock in your mouth,” I grit, feeling the
wave of anger take me again.

“
But
they didn’t. It’s going to be different when I'm gone, we won’t
see each other as much, which sucks, but that gives you a chance to
figure out the divorce,” her hand tightened over mine, “and it's
less chance of us being caught. And if I’m not living in town,
there isn’t anyone to gossip about. You can come see me at school,
we can even get a hotel.” I recognized her rambling as an effort to
try to convince the both of us.

“
I’m
sorry for putting us both in this position.”

“
What
position? A friend? Someone to talk to? Don't be sorry for that. I'm
not.”

“
A
friend that finger fucked you in an elevator.” I reminded,
irritated with myself.

“
That’s
a bonus.” She shrugged, her demeanor playful and endearing.

I quirked a grin.
“That’s one hell of a bonus.”

“
It
can be.” She teased and took another sip of her Frappuccino,
swirling the straw around as she did so.

“
Only
once and a while?” I hummed, leaning closer. My voice lowering an
octave caught her attention and her eyes slammed to mine, instantly
alert, aroused. “If the number of times I’ve had you cumming is
any indication…”

“
Reed.”
Her mouth popped open in shock as she glanced to the tables around
us. When she was confident we hadn’t been overheard, she finished.
“Want to take me in the bathroom stall?”

This time my mouth
popped open and eyes fell wide. “Seriously?” I pushed back from
the table before pausing to wait for her answer. “'Cause I’m in.”
I hooked a thumb down the hallway to my right. Her laugh was heard
over the quiet buzz of coffee shop conversations. A few people
glanced her way, a friendly smiles on their faces. “You shithead.”
I shook my head and took a drink, loving the sexy banter I'd only
ever had with her.

“
Takes
one to know one.” She laughed again.

“
So,
all packed up?” I took a sip and relished the nutty taste as it
slid down my throat.

“
Yup.
I'm actually pretty excited. Although Callie was granted last-minute
acceptance into a culinary program in Paris, so I'll be alone this
semester.”

“
Paris?
I didn't even know she was into culinary stuff.”

“
I
didn't either.” She chuckled. “I'm kind of jealous. Paris is my
dream trip.” She sighed and swirled the plastic cup as she spoke.
“Can you imagine seeing the Louvre? The Eiffel Tower? Sipping
coffee in a cafe that Hemingway used to write in? Makes my heart
pitter-patter just thinking about it.” She placed a hand over her
heart and a dreamy smile turned her mouth.

“
You
should go.”

“
With
what? Every extra dime goes to my student loans. I don't have two
pennies to rub together,” she sighed again.

“
You'll
get there.” I held her hand over the table and knew with every
fiber of my soul that if I could get her to Paris some day, come hell
or high water, I would do it.

“
I
hope so.”

“
You
will, I promise.” I squeezed her hand again. Her dark eyes peered
up at me from under the thick wisps of her lashes and she smiled that
smile that stopped my heart and had it beating entirely too fast all
at the same time. “How's the story?” I arched an eyebrow at her.

“
My
lips are sealed.” She pretended to pull a zip across her mouth.

“
What
will it take to get it out of you?” I leaned across the table and
trailed fingertips up the bend of her elbow and lingering on her
bicep, just nearly touching the full curve of her breast. Her
breathing picked up a fraction and her pupils dilated.

“
Oh
god,” she whispered. If I would have been paying attention to her
beautiful eyes I would have seen what she had saw. Instead I was
focused on the way the top bow of her lip dipped, and how her cheeks
rose impossibly higher when she smiled. How her warm and vibrant eyes
never missed a beat. How she
got
me.

“
Reed,”
she breathed. My eyes finally found hers, wide and alarmed, not
aroused as I’d first thought.

“
Reed?”
A voice sneered over my shoulder.

“
Mel?”
I dropped my hand and spun in my char. My wife stood there, hands
clutching the shiny black leather of her purse. “Fuck.” I jumped
up. Maybe I could cover this.
Lie.
Lie. Lie.
My
inner voice chanted and thrashed in the cage, begging me to drop
those falsities from my lips.

But
I couldn’t. I couldn’t do that to Auburn, and I couldn’t do it
to me. I was done living a lie. I wanted truth, honesty, love,
happiness, and I wanted it with Auburn.
I
was ready.

“
We
need to talk.” Mel’s eyes darted from mine to Auburn’s. “I
can't believe you.” She grit through clenched teeth when her eyes
landed on mine again.

“
Please
don’t, Mel,” I murmured. “You should go Auburn.” I flashed
her a quick glance.

“
Auburn?
Is she a student, Reed? You're fucking one of your students?! I
thought you were smarter than that,” Mel spit. “Meet me at the
house.”

“
I'm
not fighting with you, Mel. If you want to talk, you can drop by my
place, but I'm not going back to that house with you to fight old
battles.”

Mel's
eyes widened when I'd finished. “Fine.” She shot me the final
glance before spinning and pounding out of the coffee shop. The last
thing I wanted to do was follow her and fight until we were blue in
the face. Why did my happiness have to have so much riding in on it?

“
Go,
Reed.” Auburn urged as she gathered her purse. Her eyes burned with
sadness. Devastation. Complete and total loss. And that’s when I
knew I loved her. Because her heart was big enough to fit me and all
my baggage in it.

“
Thank
you.” I clasped both her hands and gave them a quick squeeze. “I
promise, I'll call you.” I pressed a quick kiss to her lips before
bolting out of the coffee shop to try to ease the blow with Mel. I
hoped she wouldn't do anything irrational.
My
future with Auburn depended on it.

“
What’s
going on Reed?” Mel advanced on me when I'd pulled into the parking
spot in front of my building.

“
Can
we go inside?” I growled, aware of the neighborhood gossips. She
seethed as she stomped up the steps. I knew I couldn’t explain
anything to her, I didn’t understand it myself.

“
I’m
sorry,” I offered once we'd crossed the threshold in an effort to
keep some sense of peace.

“
For
getting caught?” She turned, her eyes large and accusing.

“
That
you had to find out like that.”

“
Shove
the pity up your ass, Reed. You put everting in jeopardy with that
slut. And she's your student! What were you thinking?”

“
She's
not my student, she's in college.” I defended, lamely.

“
So
you left me for a college student. I never thought you were that guy,
Reed. What's going on in your head?!”

“
More
than you could fathom,” I grit, resentment evident in every word.
She had this all wrong, but I couldn't being myself to tell her why
I'd really left. I didn't think I could stand the pity.

“
Really?
Because it looks like you were only thinking with your dick.” The
words dripped with resentment.

“
That's
not what this is,” I answered. What I wanted to say was that I
loved Auburn, I loved her with a love I hadn't even known was
possible before her.

“
Oh
God, you don't think you're the only one, do you?” Mel's cynical
laugh radiated in the tension between us. “Girls like her fuck the
college quarterback, not poor high school teachers.” Mel's
satisfied grin had my blood running cold.

“
Mel.”
I ground through my teeth, wishing I would have stayed at that coffee
shop with Auburn and let Mel throw her tantrum alone. But Mel
discovering us had forced me to play the hand I was given, I deserved
this for keeping so many secrets for so long.

“
Stop.
Don't 'Mel' me!” She held a hand out to keep me at a distance. “How
long?” She composed herself, the tone of her voice cold, her eyes
daggers as she watched me.

“
Not
long.” I shook my head.

“
Tell
me how long.” She grit and advanced on me again.

“
It's
not your fucking business.” Anger filtered into my voice no matter
how hard I tried to keep it in check.

“
Was
this some sort of bullshit mid-life crisis? Did you think you were
going to come back to me? Sleep in our bed?”

“
No,
I didn't think that at all.”

“
This
started in the spring, didn’t it? You've been so cagey and
secretive since you left. I thought maybe I was overreacting when I
caught you out in the middle of the day but this... God! How could I
have not seen this coming?!”

I
said nothing, because she wasn’t wrong. Not about her not seeing it
coming, I didn’t see it coming either, not in a million years, but
that it had been inevitable. Given the right place and the right
time, Auburn and I, I fully believed, were destined to happen.

“
When
your mom told me you’d asked for her recipe a while back I thought
it was weird but I didn’t think much of it beyond that, but when
Michelle said that Steph was chattering on about you acting
suspicious last week after the writing class–”

“
Wait,
what?” I lifted my head in confusion.

“
Steph
said you implied that you were seeing someone when she talked to you
last week. When I heard that, I knew I had to know one way or
another, just to put my mind at ease. I wanted them to be wrong. I
wanted them to be lying, fat, clucking chickens who have nothing
better to talk about than other people's business, but you were gone
this weekend. I must have driven by your building a dozen times
Saturday night waiting for you to come home so we could talk. So what
was it–a lover's getaway? Did you shack up in some hotel and fuck
her all weekend?”

“
I
thought we were seeing other people! You made it clear you were
moving on! How couldn’t you expect the same from me?” I raged,
confused and angrier than I'd ever been. “What happened to you,
Mel? You're so bitter.” She said she didn't know who I was anymore,
but this selfish, manipulative person wasn't the woman I'd married
six years ago either.

“
Me?
Me?! You've embarrassed me! I have family in this town! Friends! And
now they all know you left me to fuck around with some whore!”

“
Don't
call her that. Don't you ever call her that.” I advanced, my fists
clenching with barely contained restraint.

“
Oh...”
Mel's vindictive laugh echoed off the cream walls of my small
apartment. “You love her?! You’re so weak.” She spat with a
grin.

The last thing I
felt was weak. I felt strong, in command of my life and my future. I
felt better than ever. “Get out.”

“
Always
running.” She shook her head. “Do you fuck her here? Does she
sneak in your door late at night because you're too ashamed for the
entire town to see that your mid-life crisis comes in the form of a
silly college girl?” She turned and swiped a stack of books off the
kitchen island, then stormed across the room and shoved at my
mountain bike without care for broken parts or the three hundred
dollar price tag. It clattered with a tinny crash before she kicked
at the wheel and spun to land eyes on the bookcase that was freshly
stained and waiting for a second coat. Auburn’s bookcase.