Before Him Comes Me (22 page)

“You will be a member of the King Council. It is your
birthright. How could you think about walking away from that?”

“I want a happy wife. I want a happy life. I want happy
children. I want my children to have what I had.”

“But when I asked to serve you… you rejected me,” Zara said
in almost a whisper.

“Zara, I didn’t reject you. I said we should shower and eat
before we discussed it. That’s miles away from a rejection. I need you to
understand this. Submission is not something you practice. If you decide to
submit to me, your collar is in a box in my room. I’ll show you where later. And
if that day ever arrives, I will proudly accept your submission. But that will
be the beginning and the end for many things.”

Garrett picks up a large sponge and squeezes water down Zara’s
neck and shoulders, the warmth relaxing her to the point of almost drifting off.

This. This is where I want to spend the rest of my life.

Startled by the sound of the water being turned back on, Zara
watches Garrett reach for some fruit and hold a grape to her lips. Seeing him
pop several into his own mouth with a smirk, she knew he was allowing her time
to consider before continuing the conversation that could impact both of their
lives.

“Beginning and end?” Zara twists around to make eye contact.

“The beginning of our life together. You were raised in the Community,
so you understand what that means. We will need to make some decisions together
on how we move forward from here. The collar is only the beginning of the
conversation. As I said, I am a Dom – a Dom who wishes to navigate the waters
with his submissive and make a happy life together. Perhaps that is why I can
walk away from the King Council. I will be a Dom whether I am on the Council in
the Community or not. That cannot be dictated by anyone else.”

Listening intently, Zara ran her fingers through the water
and the bubbles, “And the end?”

“Well… the end. That is entirely different. The end is… the
end of your life as a single college student with the freedom to do as she
pleases with whomever she pleases. It is also the end of me standing silently
by while you deal with your family and friends. All of those issues become mine
to address as I see fit. In this area, I am exactly like all other Doms.”

With the change in Garrett’s tone, Zara’s eyes fell to her
hands in the water. Garrett found her hands under the water and tugged her
towards him. “Come back here, Little One.”

Zara slowly moved back between Garrett’s legs and leaned into
his chest.

“You have changed quite a bit in the little time that you
have been at school. Do you feel different?”

“Sometimes I feel I am a completely different person. When I
am talking with a group of friends and we start laughing about something, or
when Ella and I go to dance class and I am actually up there demonstrating how
to do a new move; even singing along to a song that they have playing in their
room while we are getting ready to go somewhere.

“Then there are moments, when I sit back and wonder how I could
ever fit in with these people. I am so different. The favorite pastime in the
dorm is to sit around and talk about guys, who you have dated, who you have
slept with, and what you did with that person. I am so out of place in that
conversation. Not just because I have never had those experiences, but because
of the lifestyle I was raised in.”

“What do you mean by lifestyle?”

“If I were to open up about the lifestyle, they would
automatically jump to whips and chains.”

“You didn’t seem to have an issue discussing it with Branden
and Viv.”

“They are your family. You trust them.”

“Zara, you have to give trust to get it. I am not advocating
that you make a general announcement in Yakeley Hall. You have some very close
girlfriends that care for you and that mean a great deal to you. Why not start
with Ella and Liliana. Give it some thought.

“You are half-way through your first year of college. You
gave up a great deal to have these experiences. How are you feeling about it so
far?” He stood up, leaving a coolness at her back, and wrapped his towel around
his waist before stepping from the tub.

“Think on that incredibly thought provoking question. I’m
going to go take a quick shower and then meet you in the kitchen. I would be
honored if you would prepare us something to eat.”

Zara watched Garrett pad quietly out of the bathroom.

My collar is here. There is still a chance. He will be my Sir. I
can tell Ella and Liliana about the Community. Zar, not now! You get to cook
for him now! Get going!

Looking up from her book, Zara glances out the window. Surprised
that she has gotten lost in the hunt for Caroline’s O for so long, Zara
chuckles as she puts the book down and heads to the kitchen to finish dinner. The
clock on the microwave reads 4:40pm so Zara picks up her pace. Garrett will be
home from the office within the hour and she wants everything just right.

As Zara reaches into the oven for the lasagna, the sound of
the front door opening alerts her to Garrett’s return. Carefully setting down
the large dish, Zara turns to go greet Garrett and his best friends but before
she makes it out of the kitchen, he walks in wearing a smile.

“Something smells delicious. I like coming home to you in
the kitchen. Only four days into your winter break and I’m hooked,” Garrett,
says as he walks over to inspect a large pan of pasta resting on the stove.

“This looks even better than it smells.” He turns and gives
Zara a half smile. “Here’s the deal. Branden and Viv have been over here hanging
out each day almost your entire break. I wanted to spend Christmas Eve alone
with you, so I asked them to wait until tomorrow to come back over. They will
be here in the morning.”

“Okay.” Zara walks around Garrett and picks up the lasagna
and takes it to the table set for four. “I hope you like lasagna.”

Garrett slips up behind her and pulls her chair out for her.
“I am positive that I’m going to love your lasagna as I’ve enjoyed all the
meals you have prepared thus far. I must say I also enjoy the bit of sass in
you as well.”

Breathe, Zar. He is joking. See he is smiling. Tone. Breathe. It
is okay.

“This is the first time I have ever had Italian on Christmas
Eve,” Garrett says eyeing the table. Zara sucks in air and looks at the spread
of food on the table in front of her. “Little One, I happen to love Italian, as
you know. We may have started a new tradition.”

Relaxing, Zara begins to load Garrett’s plate and then her
own. The steam from the lasagna rises, adding to the heat in the room. Zara’s
family had lasagna many times growing up but not once did she feel the warmth
she was experiencing during this dinner with Garrett.

“I didn’t make a dent in it. It was great,” Garrett says as
he gets up with the lasagna pan in hand. “Leftovers?”

Zara nods and begins clearing the rest of the table. “I am
going to take a quick shower. I’ll meet you in the den.”

Garrett turns and heads to his room.

The kitchen is returned to its before-dinner state in no
time. Zara heads to her room to grab her book and then to the den to wait for
Garrett. Stretching out on the couch, she barely gets the book open to the page
she left off on before he comes walking in.

Placing a wrapped present on the coffee table in front of her,
Garrett lifts her legs, sits down and places her legs across his lap. Zara
stares at the large wrapped Christmas gift sitting directly in her line of
sight. She slowly turns to look at him and finds him already staring at her
with a big grin on his face.

“I thought you said all the gifts were down with your
parents?” Zara questions in a soft clear voice.

“Most of the gifts are down with my parents. One is not. One
is here. For you. To open now.”

“One second, please,” Zara says looking at the gift and smiling.

She lifts her legs off his and stands. Walking out of the
room, Zara breaks into a jog once she clears the door. From her room, she
retrieves a thin box wrapped in colorful Christmas paper. She reaches into the
side pocket of her backpack and pulls out a big red bow. Peeling the adhesive,
she quickly sticks it on the center of the box as she makes her way back to the
den and Garrett.

She looks at Garrett as she enters the room and his dazzling
smile stops her in her tracks. Slowly, she makes her way back to the sofa, but
this time she curls up next to him. With gift in hand, Zara rests her head on
his chest to enjoy the moment of closeness with him. Wrapping his arms around
her, they sit in silence as they wait to open their Christmas gifts to each
other on their first Christmas Eve together.

“Okay. Time to open your present,” Garrett says, interrupting
their peaceful moment of quiet.

Zara hands Garrett his present and reaches for the large box
on the coffee table. Drawing it onto her lap, she begins ripping off the
wrapping paper.

“I see you’re not a try-to-save-the-paper kind of lady. Very
cool,” Garrett says chuckling.

“Save it for what? I never understood the point. Part of the
pleasure of giving someone a gift is presenting the present. That means
locating the best paper for the gift. It doesn’t necessarily have to be
wrapping paper. It could be wrapped with anything, really. But certainly not
the same thing twice.” Zara leans back against the sofa and stares at the
package.

“No, Little One. It is not reused paper. But open it,
please.”

Tearing the paper off the box, Zara pauses and stares at the
picture displayed on its side.

“If you don’t like it, I can return it,” Garrett says in a
low voice.

Cautiously turning so the box stays in her lap, Zara reaches
up to hug Garrett and whisper in his ear, “I love it. It’s actually perfect. Thank
you.”

“You seemed to enjoy using Ella’s camera all the time and I
figured it would be easier for her to teach you if you had one of your own. You
could also sign up for a photography class.”

“Gifts were never a big deal growing up.” Zara begins
looking at each side of the box carefully. “Fredrik got me daisies for my
birthday every year. We knew that I was not going to be able to take anything
with me when I left, so he was careful never to get me anything that would
last.

“Thank you for my camera. I am excited to begin using it.” Zara
places the camera gently on the coffee table and returns to her place nestled
next to Garrett. “Time for you to open your gift.”

With grand movements, Garrett begins the process of removing
the wrapping paper from the present that Zara has given him. The plain white
box gives no hint to what is inside and Garrett looks at Zara with a look of
curiosity. Lifting the top, Garrett moves the tissue paper aside to reveal a
frame lying face down.

He turns the frame over and discovers a picture of the two
of them taken the day of the football game when Zara and her friends had joined
him at The Club. Captured in the picture, Zara is in Garrett’s arms leaning
against his chest, and they are looking into each other’s eyes. The
surroundings have been blurred and the two of them appear as if they are the
only ones in existence in that moment.

Garrett leans down and places a soft kiss on Zara’s lips. “Little
One, this is the best gift I could have received. Thank you.”

“You are welcome,” Zara whispers.

“This may be my new favorite picture of you.” Garrett says
as he sets the frame up facing the two of them on the edge of the coffee table.

Still staring at it, he asks, “Did you keep a copy for your
dorm?”

Zara nods and retrieves the camera box. Opening it, she
takes out the owner’s manual and puts the box back.

“Wait. What are you doing?”

“Reading about the camera you gave me.”

“Aren’t you going to take the camera out and play with it
first?”

“I thought it better that I get an overview of what
everything is prior to actually touching it.”

“You could do it that way…” Garrett lifts the box to the
other side of the sofa and begins to slowly open the top. “I’ll just go ahead
and play with the camera over here while you sit and read the manual.”

Trying hard to ignore him, Zara flips to the first page with
focused intent and begins scanning the page. Garrett slowly unpacks the camera
from all its packaging. By page two, Zara hears the familiar click of a picture
being taken.

“I know you are trying really hard to concentrate on that
manual when all you really want to do it get your hands on this new camera of
yours. Wait… Little One, are you trying to not smile? Are you holding back a
smile? There it is!”

Click. Click. Click.

Zara tosses the manual on the coffee table next to the box
and leans back against the sofa. “Garrett, may I please play with my new
camera?”

“Much better,” Garrett says laughing as he hands Zara her
Christmas present.

With camera in hand, Zara leans forward to pick the manual
back up and returns to the page she was just looking at. Giggling, she sets the
camera on her lap and examines each area of the camera with the diagram in her
hand. Garrett sits next to her, speechless.

After watching her for a few minutes, Garrett picks up Zara’s
copy of
Wallbanger
and begins reading it. Zara notices and says, “Would
you like to do something else? I can certainly play with this later.”

“This is exactly how I want to spend tonight – alone with
you on this sofa. Perhaps, more lasagna later, but that’s it.”

“Would you like me to go get one of your books or a magazine?”
Zara inquires looking at her book in his hand.

“Nope. I want to see what has you laughing so hard that I
can hear you from the kitchen.”

Zara’s eyes get big and Garrett plants a quick kiss on the
tip of her nose.

Garrett starts reading again. Zara stares at the manual but
does not see any of the words on the page. Her thoughts have traveled back to
Christmas with her family. There was a Christmas tree decorated just so. It
lacked the personal touches of a family with young children, no homemade
ornaments or decorations all in a cluster. The Evans’ trees were always
showroom quality, as were the wrapped presents underneath, all with matching
paper and bows.

By age five, Christmas had lost its shine for Zara. She knew
that the perfectly wrapped presents under the tree were for display only. She
had also learned that her gifts would be clothes, while Fredrik would receive a
wide range of toys. Zara was expected to sit in her presentation position and
watch him open his gifts one by one.

It was not long before Fredrik also noticed the incongruity
and struggled to open his gifts. Zara had conversations with him for weeks
before the holiday to explain to her little brother that this was how Christmas
was supposed to be for all little kids. She explained that her toys were at the
library. After they were dismissed Christmas morning, he would sneak one of his
small trucks into her room to play and he continued to do it even up through
their last Christmas together.

As they got older, both siblings began to dislike the
holiday. They went through the motions as expected but in the end, Christmas
was never a happy time. Sitting quietly on the sofa next to Garrett, staring at
her first real Christmas gift, Zara could not believe how much her life had
changed since walking into the Circle.

This is what Christmas should feel like.

Picking up her camera, Zara points to the table she loves
and snaps her very first picture. Pressing the button to review her photo, the
pictures Garrett had taken of her appear. Nudging him with her elbow, Garrett
looks at what she is showing him.

“Cute and studious, even reading an owner’s manual.” Zara
cycles through the pictures; the table is the last one. Returning to the book
in hand, Garrett says, “The table was your very first subject. Nope, I am not
hurt in the least bit.”

Zara quickly scoots off the sofa, “Hey!”

Standing in front of Garrett, she asks, “Ready for more
lasagna?”

She clicks a couple of pictures right in a row. “You make a
much better subject than the table.”

“Pasta me, please,” Garrett says smiling broadly.

Walking toward the kitchen, Zara places the camera gently on
the dining table. With Garrett on her heels, she pulls the lasagna out of the
warm oven.

“How did you know?”

“I make pretty good lasagna,” Zara says with a proud smile
on her face.

“Indeed, you do.” Garrett gets silverware and heads to the
table. “So many talents.”

Zara’s smile grows and her face is covered in a blush as she
carries the plates to the table.