Before Ryan Was Mine (The Remembrance Trilogy - Prequel) (6 page)

“What are you doing, exactly?”

“I’m creating a vacuum to separate the liquid from the solid, but it will still be too slow. I don’t want to be here all night.”

“Won’t we get in trouble for not following instructions?”

I grunted, sarcasm my only acknowledgment of what he’d asked. “Can you get that filter paper and weigh it, please? Do it twice to make sure it’s accurate. And, no, we won’t get in trouble. We should get an extra credit for knowing how to do it more than one way; but we don’t even need to tell Dr. Johnson. All we need is the correct weight of solid from the solution and we’ll ace it.”

Nate took the paper to the scale and calibrated it, before writing down the weight and handing it back to me. I had the solution flask chilling in an ice water bath as I rigged up the makeshift vacuum, securing a Buchner funnel to the top of the vacuum flask and placing the piece of coffee filter that Nate had weighed into it. It would collect the solids from the saturated solution. We would then weigh it again, subtract the weight of the filter paper, and we’d have our finished weight of the acid solids.

After the solution was poured into the funnel, the aspirator began to suck the liquid into the flask at a snail’s pace, drop by frustrating drop.
Ugh
! I pulled the phone out and looked at the screen, and I had three messages. I scrolled through them and landed on the one from Julia.

Since I didn’t hear from you, I went to HotSpot with Ellie. I promised her months ago anyway. It’s the grand opening and I’d forgotten. Sorry! Hope your experiment turns out. Maybe we can do the movie tomorrow night?

Disappointment, and a new rush of anger at Nathan, surged through me. I couldn’t go the following night because some girl in my trig class invited me to a keg party her sorority was throwing at their house off campus. When Aaron found out, there was no getting out of going. He was all about meeting new girls. I considered that I could invite Julia and Ellie to come along, but the woman who’d invited me had done it because she wanted to get to know me, and it would be rude to invite other women. Especially Julia. I’d be talking to her all night, and besides, she might think bringing her would be a fucked up thing to do. I was royally screwed.

I glanced impatiently at Nate. He was washing the crystals by putting more distilled water through the aspirator. The substance had to be as pure as we could possibly make it to get to the correct weight. Any overage would lower our grade. It had to be exact.

I ran a hand over the stubble on my jaw, scratched along its edge before turning my back to Nate and typed out my reply to Julia.

I got hung up at the lab making aspirin with Nate. Tomorrow night won’t work, but how about Sunday? I’m really sorry about tonight.

If the girls were at a club, I knew there was no way Julia would get back to me tonight. Part of me wanted to finish up at the lab then wait outside her dorm or go to the club. I sighed. I’d look like an idiot if I did that.

I realized I was missing her, and it was unsettling. She was becoming the best friend I’d ever had. I didn’t know if it was because I could talk to her about things I couldn’t discuss with Aaron, or the attraction I felt that made me want to spend every waking moment with her. Admittedly, she was easier on the eyes, smelled better, and, maybe best of all, she fed me.

There was no way in hell I was going to chase her down. That was just weird, and it might send the wrong message, though I was unclear what message I wanted to send. She was beautiful and sexy, and I couldn’t get her out of my head.

I checked the connection between the flask and the rubber tube that helped create the suction.

Nate was bent over his phone, but suddenly popped up, excited. “Dude, this girl I’m dating asked me to come over to her apartment right now because her roommate isn’t home. I think I’m gonna get laid. Do you mind if I bail?”

Sure
, I thought.
Fucking leave me with finishing the experiment, and then cleanup alone. Why the hell not? Your clumsy ass has already ruined my night
. My mouth thinned as I pressed my lips into a line. “Really?” I asked in exasperation.

“Dude,
come on
,” he pleaded with me. “I’ve been trying to get into this girl’s pants since the beginning of the year.”

“Okay.” I nodded toward the door, silently telling him to get the fuck out. “But you owe me.”

“You got it. Thanks!”

Nate left, and I turned back to the flask to check the progress of the experiment. Drip. Drip.
Fucking drip.

*****

I rolled over in my bed, burying my face in the pillow, and threw an arm over my head. The sun was shining in through the window—the blinds were bent almost to the point of being destroyed.
I’ll ask mom to get new ones over Thanksgiving
, I thought. The morning sun leaked through into the room and landed right in my face. I groaned in protest. There were noises coming from Aaron’s room. The apartment we shared was in an old house, not far from campus.

The night before, I’d come home from the lab to an empty apartment, grabbed a beer, turned on the TV, and ordered pizza. Granted, I was under age and shouldn’t have been drinking, but one of Aaron’s older frat brothers left them in our fridge, so whatever. I was bored, feeling agitated, and needed to take the edge off. I hoped one or two beers might make me sleepy.

I’d gnawed on the pizza at the same time as watching the lame movie that was playing on HBO. Anxious irritation with myself for checking my phone every ten minutes, looking for a text from Julia nagged at me. It never came in, and the hours ticked by at a crawl. Three beers later, my eyes finally started to get heavy. I’d pushed up from the couch and somehow ended up sans clothes and flopped across my bed.

The sound of a woman giggling nudged me awake. I raised my head so I could glance over my shoulder, my eyes opened to a squint. The giggle wasn’t one I recognized, so who in the hell was it? I tried to focus on the form in the doorway. Her hair was unnaturally red, to the point of being obnoxious, and she was wearing bright pink panties but nothing else.

“Nice ass, Ryan. Maybe I was in bed with the wrong Matthews.”

The door to my room was open, so apparently my ass was on display. I didn’t recognize the girl, and I reached down to pull the sheet over me. “What the hell? Do you mind?” My hand held the sheet together around my waist, and I pushed up off the bed to take three steps and yell down the hall at Aaron. “Yo! Dude! Can you keep your toys in your own room, please?”

I frowned at the nameless girl who was looking me up and down and preening in front of me. She ran her fingers through one side of her long hair and made no move to cover her bare tits from my view. Her skin was ruddy and covered in freckles, and her nipples brownish. Instead of turning me on as she intended, it just pissed me off.

“If you’ll excuse me,” I said. My free hand grabbed the edge of the door and I flung it shut with a slam. Seriously, it wasn’t like me to be so rude, but I was feeling pensive. If she didn’t have any fucking manners then I didn’t need them either.

I fell back onto my bed and the springs squeaked. My parents’ idea of roughing it at college went a little far in my estimation. When my phone chimed a few seconds later, I rolled over to retrieve it off of the floor. Finally! A text from Julia.

I just saw your text, sorry. I didn’t get home until after two. What’s going on tonight? Hot date?

Damn the party tonight, and damn how shitty I felt having to tell her. I wasn’t sure why I felt like I wanted to lie and say it was some boys’ night out instead of what it really was. I closed my eyes briefly, considering what to say before opening them to type out my response.

Not sure how hot it is, or even if it’s a date. I was invited to a sorority party.

I crawled from the bed, buck-naked and walked into the bathroom, carrying my phone with me. The one saving grace of this shitty apartment was that each bedroom had its own bathroom, albeit a small one. I glanced in the mirror. I looked like hell. My hair was standing up all over my head and I had a thick growth of beard on my jaw. I scratched at it absently and glanced down at my silent phone.
Shit!
I reached in and turned on the shower, not bothering to adjust the temperature of the water.

Her response came in as I climbed under the hot spray. It was too hot and burned my chest. I jumped back, cussing at myself, and fumbled with the faucet. I leaned out to look at Julia’s text, without picking up the phone.

Oh, okay. Well, have fun. I’ll just talk to you tomorrow.

I grimaced at the trite response. At least it
seemed
trite. Maybe she didn’t even mean it that way, and maybe it was all in my head. I got back in the shower, arguing with myself. We’d met less than two months ago, but since last month when she stayed the weekend, it had become a habit to see each other, or at least talk, every day. We’d fallen into being friends after an uncomfortable few weeks where my dick rebelled against my brain. Who was I kidding? It still rebelled just about every time I saw her, but I liked being around her, despite the constant fight with my libido. She was funny, and smart, and it was easy being with her. I could be myself.

We weren’t dating, so what the fuck was my problem? I wasn’t even sure I wanted to date Julia because it might damage the amazing friendship we shared. Yet, it felt strangely uncomfortable telling her I couldn’t see her because I would be out with someone else. It was stupid! If I’d gotten that text from Aaron, Nate, or even any other woman I knew, I wouldn’t have given it a second thought. I would have taken it at face value, end of story.

I was overthinking.
Way
overthinking. Sexually, I wanted her, so that had to be the reason for my confusion. Did I want more than friendship? Was I afraid to hurt her feelings? Whatever the hell it was, I had to figure it out and fast. We were friends, and that was that. She wasn’t giving me anything specific that hinted she wanted anything beyond what it was, so why was I analyzing the shit out of it? I rinsed the shampoo from my hair and turned off the water. Dripping wet, I grabbed my phone and typed out a quick response.

Okay, I’ll call you when I get up.

*****

So, all day Saturday, I could have studied but I wasn’t motivated beyond a couple hours with the books. Thanksgiving break was coming up, and classes the coming week would be weak, at best. Stanford would only be in session on Monday and Tuesday, so the week would be short. I went for a run in the cold, late fall air and puttered around the apartment watching sports and doing laundry for the rest of the day.

I didn’t hear from Julia at all, and though I didn’t really expect to, I was still thinking about her. She had a paper due in her business writing class, and she’d no doubt be working on it. I was dying to ask how her night went, but I didn’t really want to talk about the party I was obligated to go later that night. Maybe the lack of communication was best, even if it didn’t sit well. I just wanted this night to be done and over with. Tomorrow, Julia wouldn’t ask me about it, and we’d hang out as we planned. It probably bothered me more than it did her. I shook my head, wishing my thoughts would stop.

Aaron was screwing off the entire day with some of his fraternity brothers; which made it easy for me to stay in the apartment to study. The math assignment I was working on blurred, as my thoughts wandered again. The ringing of my phone startled me out of it, and I quickly reached for it. I knew it would be my mother because she called every Saturday around the same time.

“Hey, Mom,” I answered.

“How’s my baby?”

“Mom, please.” I rolled my eyes, got up, and walked into the kitchen. It was small and littered with remnants of my late night pizza delivery. Beer bottles were scattered around the counter and on the coffee table in the living room. The pizza had been terrible, but it was the only pizza place that delivered late at night. Julia referred to it as The Cardboard Palace. “Are you ever going to stop calling me your baby?”

“You’ll always be my baby. Is Aaron home?”

I shook my head out of habit, even though she couldn’t see me. “No, but I’m meeting him for dinner in a bit, and then later, he’s dragging me to a party.”

“Funny, I spoke to him earlier, and he said you were the one invited by one of the sorority sisters.”

“That’s a technicality. He’s the one who wants to go.” I opened the refrigerator and pulled out a carton of juice, opened it up, and took a pull directly from the container.

“It will be fun, won’t it? Tell me about the girl. Is she pretty?”

I cringed internally at my lack of facts. I hardly knew anything about her but tried to remember the details of her face so I could at least not sound like a total prick to my mom. “I don’t know her that well, but yeah, she’s pretty.” I was holding the phone between my shoulder and ear so I could close the juice and place it back in the fridge.

“You don’t sound overly enthused, honey.”

“You should be glad I’m not. It’s a kegger. Loud music, lots of people drunk off of their asses and half of them puking by the driveway. And probably weed. I can always smell it in the air at these things.” I grinned at her audible gasp. “Um, except not Aaron and me, Mom. We just go to watch the girls.” I couldn’t help teasing. My mother was sort of refined, and rowdy college antics might not have occurred to her unless I planted the seed. She’d attended private schools her entire life.

“Sure you do, Ryan. I wasn’t born last night.”

I laughed. “Sure, it should be fun. I guess.”

“About Thanksgiving; I have your flights arranged for Tuesday evening. I thought we’d get to spend a long weekend together and you boys wouldn’t be so tired. Dad is really looking forward to having you both home.”

“Me, too. Aaron has a new girl he’s into, so he might not be so keen to come to Chicago.”

“Well, that’s too bad. We haven’t seen you two since August.”

“I know, but you know how it is, Mom.”

“Honestly, Ryan, I thought it would be you who would be reluctant to come home, for the same reason.”