Begin Again (24 page)

“Yeah
, baby, that sounds good.” He hated that he was going to keep this from her, but she was blinded by the possibility of having her brother back in her life. He just prayed that it wouldn’t blow up in his face.

After dinner
, his sister and Luke picked up Carrington. He cleaned up the kitchen for Journey while she got the kids ready for bed. Every time she smiled at him throughout the night he could see her excitement and it worried him how she might react if the relationship she wanted with her brother didn’t go well, but that’s why she had him.

Dylan pulled up in front of Master’s Ink tattoo parlor.
He’d gone by Cash’s house first, but no one was home. One of his neighbors was standing out in his driveway.

“Hi there, do you know Cash Cummings?”

“Yeah, what do you want him for?” He looked at Dylan skeptically.

“His sister is my
girlfriend and I wanted to come meet him. His sister wants us to be friends.” He was hoping the guy knew where he could find him.

“Oh, well he’s probably with his roommate Jared at his
tattoo parlor.”

The guy gave Dylan the name a
nd he plugged it into his GPS. Pulling out of the driveway, he started having second thoughts about going there, but he shook it off.

He got out of his truck and
went up to the door. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and stepped inside. It didn’t look like any of the tattoo parlors he’d seen. It was very clean and artsy looking. The walls were painted red and the pictures that hung up all over the walls were ones of tattoo-covered pin-up girls. Some looked like enlarged pictures of tattoos they may have done. All along one wall were big binders; he assumed they were full of tattoo ideas.

A girl with jet-black pigtails came out from the back. She smiled when she saw him. “Hi, can I help you?”

“Yeah, I was wondering if Cash was here. My name’s Dylan and I’m his sister’s boyfriend. We haven’t met yet, so I stopped by.” He could turn on the charm when necessary.

“Really! Oh
, that’s so great. He told us he reconnected with her. I’ll go get him.” She pranced through the building and out the back door.

He wasn’t s
ure what he was expecting, but a minute later a guy came walking toward him. He was a little shorter than Dylan. His hair was the same color as Journey’s, but his eyes were a darker blue. He looked like he was in pretty good shape. He certainly didn’t look like what he pictured a junkie to look like,
okay ex-junkie,
he thought.

“Dylan?” Cash looked a little leery
, but still stuck out his hand to shake his.

“Yeah.
It’s good to meet you, Cash. Sorry I’m just stopping by like this, but I was hoping we could talk.” He still wasn’t sure what he was going to say to him, which was really smart or really stupid.

“
Sure, are JoJo and the kids okay?”

Dylan followed Cash out the front door and down to a little coffee shop. “Yeah
, they’re fine.” They ordered their coffee and sat down. “Your sister’s happy you contacted her. She wants you in her life.”

“Let me guess
: you don’t?” Cash didn’t seem to be bothered by it.

“
Well, I don’t know you, so I can’t really say. I’ll admit I’m curious about your intentions. I mean, come on—she hasn’t heard from you in two years and then you call her out of the blue. Why wait so long?” He knew most of Cash’s story, but wanted to hear it from his mouth.

“Well, why would I call her when my life was a fucking mess? I’m sure you know why JoJo is raising Abby.
I’ve been an addict since I was sixteen. I should be dead, but for some reason I’m not. I’ve been sober for almost a year and a half. I’ve made mistakes—mistakes that landed me in jail. My girlfriend is dead and my daughter is being raised by my sister. All I want is to make things right with her and Abby.”

Dylan took the
coffee the waitress handed him, sitting it down in front of him. “What kind of relationship have you ever had with her? From what I understand, you’ve never really been there for her. Why should she welcome you back now? Is it her money? I know your parents left you both money. Is this some scam to get money from her?”

He could see the anger on Cash’s face.
“Listen, asshole, don’t think I don’t know about you, too. About how you fucked my sister and then left her pregnant and alone. I believe she said you gave her a fake last name, so when she tried to find you she couldn’t. I don’t want her money, I’ve got my own. No, I didn’t blow all of mine. As a matter of fact, my parents were smart and had a stipulation in their will that I couldn’t touch it unless I’d proven that I was clean. Hell, I’m still taking piss tests to prove it. I’ve already put most of it in a trust for Abby so she’ll have money for college when she’s older.”

“I’m just looking out for Journey and
the kids. You can spout all the shit you want, but you can’t blame me for wanting to see for myself. She’s young and hopeful and I didn’t want her grasping at the only family she has left only to have her heart broken.”

“Are you in love with my sister?” Cash asked.

“That’s not any of your business, but yes: I am. Why were you in jail?” Dylan could see right away that the question hit a nerve. The other man’s face turned scarlet and he looked down at the table.

“I’m not talking about that with you.
Listen, if you don’t want me going to see her this weekend, just say so. I’ll never stop trying to reconnect with her, though.”

“
That’s not why I came here. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t out to hurt them.” He stood up from the table. “You have to see where I’m coming from. It’s my job to protect them and that’s what I was doing. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention this visit to your sister.”

Cash stood up out of the booth
. “Yeah, sure. I won’t say anything to her.”

“Good, see you Saturday.”

Dylan watched him walk out the door. He paid for the coffees and walked out. Making his way out to his truck, he noticed Cash standing out in front of the tattoo parlor smoking a cigarette. Neither man said anything to the other as Dylan went to his truck. He sent Journey a quick text that he was getting done with work early and would pick up the kids. A couple of weeks before, Journey added him to the pickup list for the kids.

Before he pulled away
, his phone buzzed. Smiling, he saw Journey’s response.

Thanks baby, c u after bit. <3

Chapter Seventeen

Journey’s stomach had been turning all day. Her brother was coming for dinner and she was beyond nervous. She’d been power cleaning most of the morning just to keep herself from staring at the clock. He wasn’t due to arrive until four, but said he may come earlier. Chewing on her nails, she stressed about what to do with Abby. Her girl knew that Journey’s brother was coming to visit. Abby had asked if it was her uncle, she took the coward’s way out and deflected the conversation. She had been happy when Dylan asked Abby to go with him to pick out some dessert, and they were also going to stop by his parents’ house.

Dylan had been kind of quiet since the other day.
He didn’t seem unhappy, but she could see the way his brow furrowed all of the time that something must be weighing heavily on his mind. A part of her had thought that maybe he was losing interest in her, but every night he made love to her until they were both sated and exhausted.

Journey shook her head and grabbed Joey’s little
hand. “Come on, baby boy, we need to get you dressed. You get to meet your uncle. Are you excited?” Of course he smiled and said yes, but she could have asked him if he wanted a beer and he would’ve said yes.

She dressed him in a little t-shirt that said,
“I’m cute, deal with it!” Nan loved picking up little novelty shirts like that for both kids. She put him in a cute little pair of boot cut jeans and his Sperry Top-Sliders. Now she only hoped that he didn’t get into anything that would get on his clothes. She looked at the clock as she and Joey walked out into the living room and it was already after two. She decided to put a movie on for him while she got ready back in her bedroom.

After applying just a touch of makeup to her face
, she grabbed her curling iron, sectioned off pieces of her hair, and curled them into loose waves that hung down to the middle of her back. She threw on a simple v-neck cashmere sweater and her favorite worn jeans. After she was done she sat down on the floor with Joey watching
Cars
.
Joey loved the movie and would sit and make car sounds the whole time. Smiling, Journey held her arms out as Joey climbed into her lap. She kissed the top of his head and spent some time with her favorite little boy.

When the movie was over
, she got up off of the floor and she and Joey made their way to the living room when the doorbell rang. The butterflies in her stomach took flight as she and Joey went to answer the door. Taking a deep breath she pulled the door open as Cash stood on the front steps.

“Hi! I’m so glad you came
.” She stood back so her brother could come inside. She wrapped her free around her brother, smiling when his arms wrapped around her and Joey.

“Thanks for inviting me, JoJo. Is this Joey?” His large hand rubbed over the soft dark-brown locks on her little man’s head.

“Yes, he is. Joey, this is your Uncle Cash. Can you tell him hi?” Joey gave him a toothy grin and then buried his face in Journey’s neck.

She led Cash into the living room.
“Can I get you a soda or some tea?” He was looking at a picture that was on the bookcase. It was taken by Nan on Joey’s first birthday. Joey was in nothing but his diaper sitting on the dining room table. Abby was sitting on the table next to him and she had her arms around both kids smiling.

“Um
, I’ll take some iced tea, please.” She sat Joey down on the floor and went to get her brother’s tea. When she brought it out to him she froze in the doorway. Cash had Joey in his arms and was smiling while he spoke softly to him. Her brother looked good. He was just in jeans and a long-sleeved blue Henley shirt, but he looked happy and relaxed. He turned towards her.

“He’s beautiful, JoJo. I can’t believe you’re a momma.
You know, even when you were a little girl you were always playing momma to me.”

She smiled, although she couldn’t remember ever doing that.
They had so much time to make up for, but she was going to enjoy getting to know him all over again. She handed him his tea.

“Dylan and Abby should be home anytime now.
They had to stop by his parents’ place then pick up dessert.”

“What did you tell her about me?” He looked uncomfortable
when he asked.

“She knows that my brother is coming over. I guess I’d wait to see if she recognized you. I didn’t really think it all
the way through, but if she doesn’t remember you, I thought after she’s used to you we could sit her down together and tell her who you are. I don’t know how to handle telling her about her mom, though.” The more she talked the more she realized that maybe it wasn’t the smartest move, but it was too late.

The sound of car doors shutting signaled that Dylan and Abby were back.
She met them with a big smile. “Mommy! Dylan took me to his momma’s house and she gave me cookies and then she said that I could come over with Care Bear for a sleepover!”

“That’s great, baby.” The girl
’s happiness was contagious. Dylan stepped in behind Abby and Journey reached up to kiss him. When he stepped around the corner she felt his body go rigid. She looked back at him, but he wasn’t looking at her—he was glaring at Cash, who was still holding Joey.

“Come on, baby. Come meet my brother.”
She practically had to drag him across the room, “Cash, this is Dylan. Dylan, this is my brother Cash.”

Neither man said anything, but stared each other down. She knew Dylan was leery about her brother, but it
seemed like it was something more. Journey wanted to ask what the problem was, but Abby’s little hand slipped into hers. Looking down, she saw Abby watching Cash with curious eyes. Chancing a glance at her brother, who was now looking at Abby, his eyes looked bright—like the tears would start falling at any minute.

She scooped up the little girl in her arms
. “Sweetie, this is Cash, my brother. Do you remember him?”

Abby stared at
Cash. Journey could see the wheels turning in her pretty little head. After what felt like several minutes, Abby turned to her and whispered in her ear, “Is that my daddy?”

“Yes
, baby, it is. He came to visit us, isn’t that great?” Why, oh why did she decide to do this before talking to Abby about this? She should’ve had Nan there. She and Abby had a special relationship, so maybe that would’ve made things a little easier. What if her baby wanted to go with Cash? Sure she was technically Abby’s legal guardian, but it would kill Journey if Abby wanted to be with her dad.

“But Mommy
, I want to live with you.” The little girl buried her head in Journey’s neck.

Journey looked at Cash with what she hoped was apologetic eyes
. “Honey, you’re not going anywhere. I just wanted you to meet him. He’s not here to take you away. I promise we’ll talk about this some more later. Just know that I love you, Joey loves you, and your daddy loves you.”

“What about Nana and Dylan?”
her little voice asked.

Dylan plucked her out of Journey’s arms
. “You know you’re my girl and I know your nana is crazy about you.” His eyes were soft as he spoke to Abby, but when his eyes went back to Cash they were hard and cold.

Dylan put down Abby and Journey took Joey from her brother
. “Abby, why don’t you put a movie on for you and your brother?”

“Can we watch it in my room?”
Journey had bought her a small TV and DVD player for her room.

“Sure
, baby. Just keep an eye on Joey, okay?” She tousled Abby’s hair and watched as she grabbed Joey’s hand and ran down the hall to her room. The past few minutes already seemed to be forgotten, thankfully, and she hoped that it would be an easier conversation to have later. Once the kids disappeared into Abby’s room she turned back to Dylan and Cash.

“What’s going on?” Standing in between the two men she could feel the tension.

“
Nothing, baby. I’m going to go fire up the grill.” He kissed her again and walked out the backdoor.

Looking back up at her brother
, he gave her a small smile. “Cash, what’s going on? Please don’t tell me it’s nothing.” The two men were like wild dogs circling each other. She didn’t understand either of their hostility towards the other.

She didn’t think they were ever going to be best friends, but she wanted them to get along with each other.
Her hope was that Cash would start spending more and more time with them. Family was important and the two of them shared the loss of their parents. As far as blood relations went they were all each other had.

“Nothing’s wrong
. I’m just trying out the overprotective big brother gig.” He tweaked her nose. “How am I doing so far?”

“Fine, if that’s the story you’re going to give me. Why don’t you go have a seat out on the deck?
I’ll get the kids and join you in a minute.” He kissed the top of her head and made his way outside.

Walking into Abby’s room she sat down on the bed next to Abby.
They were watching
Despicable Me 2
again. Joey sat on the floor watching the movie and playing with a truck that Dylan bought him the week before. The smile that spread across her lips was for no other reason than she was blissfully happy. Her brother was back and they were going to fix their relationship. She was in love with the most wonderful man in the world. God, she sounded like some cheesy love song. Journey was just going enjoy all of the wonderful things that had happened over the last couple of months.

“Come on
, kiddos, let’s go outside.” She slid a hoodie on Joey and helped Abby zip up hers. Abby grabbed Joey’s hand and led him outside. Smiling, she watched Joey run to Dylan and scoop him up. Abby was keeping close to Dylan as Cash spoke to her. Since they all seemed to be doing well, she started getting the side dishes ready.

“Knock, knock!” Journey turned
as Nan flounced into the kitchen with her usual flourish. Even in jeans and sweater Nan was a knock out.

“Hey, Nan.
Thanks for coming over. Come outside with me and meet Cash.” Nan had been very supportive about Journey wanting to welcome her brother back into their family. Of course Nan had warned Journey not to get her hopes up, only because Cash had been using for a long time and it could be very easy for him to fall off the wagon. Nan thought it was a good idea for her to go to any therapy session her brother wanted her to and to check out a support group for families of drug addicts.

She knew she needed to gain the tools to help her brother maintain his sobriety or to at least be there if he needed her.

Nan followed Journey outside. She made the introductions and was shocked when Nan hugged him and he hugged her right back. “Okay, you guys get acquainted. I’m going to get the burgers and hot dogs.” She turned to go and felt Dylan’s arms wrap around her middle.

“I’ll come help you.” She smiled when she led him inside.

“So I think it’s going well, don’t you?” She knew she sounded overly hopeful, but she couldn’t help it.

“Yeah
, babe, it is.” He didn’t sound convincing, but he’d warm up to Cash in time.

***

Dylan had to admit that Cash was an okay guy. He still didn’t completely trust him, but he’d give him the benefit of the doubt for the time being. They didn’t have a whole lot to talk about at first. When they had been outside by themselves, Cash told him about the night with Abby. The guy barely remembered that night.

He didn’t go into a lot of detail, but it had been bad.
So bad that they had no choice but to sign over custody to Journey. Kara, Abby’s mom, didn’t speak to her parents and she hadn’t wanted their daughter raised by them. So they chose Cash’s 21 year old sister. They didn’t get much further than that since the kids came out to join them.

The guy talked about his addiction and rehab freely
, which Dylan assumed was a positive thing. He was respectful to Nan and careful with Abby. Dylan could tell the whole time Cash was there that he wanted to hold his daughter, but she was still a little leery.

The guy was quiet most of the time while they ate, but Abby chattered enough for all of them.
She talked about school and her dance classes. Dylan could tell that Journey was trying too hard to make her brother comfortable. She was including him in conversations and telling him stories about the kids. He finally had to put his hand on her knee, giving it a squeeze. She looked up at him in confusion. “Slow down, baby,”
he mouthed.

She nodded and took it slower the rest of the night.
When Cash went to leave, Journey followed him outside. Turning to Nan, who had a sleeping Joey on her lap, Dylan asked her what she thought of Cash.

“Well
, I think he’s trying with her. He seemed uncomfortable, though. I feel for them; they have a lot of time to make up for.” She leaned down kissing Joey’s head. “If he can keep working the program, I think they’ll develop a beautiful relationship. Are you concerned?”