Benevolent (2 page)

“What did you go to school for?” I asked.

“Accounting and finance.”

I nodded. “Well, then at least you applied to the right company. That’s what they do.”

“I know. I heard about them when I was in college and have wanted to work there ever since. It’s why I moved here. So if they don’t hire me, I’m pretty much screwed.”

“Well, I’m pretty good at interviews, haven’t been in one yet that I haven’t succeeded in. Want to play one out with me? I can give you some good pointers.”

“Since you’re so good at them, sure, why not.” She shrugged her bare shoulders and it brought my attention back to the ink on her arm.

“Let’s start with appearances. Your half-sleeve, do you plan on covering it up?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Wrong answer. Don’t cover it, it’s hot.” I tapped on my chin as she smirked. “What about your Monroe? You going to take that out?”

She touched the small silver ball just above her lip on the left side. “Yes.”

“No, don’t. That would be stupid. It’s hot. Leave it in. What about your nose stud?”

Again, she touched a finger lightly to the tiny diamond stud in her right nostril. She shook her head and laughed quietly, looking back down to her drink. I could tell I was getting to her. She seemed to look down when she felt insecure. I didn’t want her to feel that way; I wanted her to feel powerful and confident. I wanted her to know what I thought about her without coming right out and saying it. Because that would be wrong.

“Let me guess…” she started as she looked back up at me. “…it’s hot and I shouldn’t remove it.”

I smiled at her and raised an eyebrow. I waited a few seconds before responding, letting her think she knew what I was going to say. “No. It’s not hot.” I watched as her face fell and her eyes were cast down again. My Adam’s apple dipped down in my throat as I spoke my next words. “It’s fucking sexy as hell, and no, you shouldn’t remove that, either.”

Her eyes met mine and I felt another body part dip low. I could literally feel her stare all the way through my entire body. It touched everything. It was like it physically reached inside of me and touched everything. My heart raced, my stomach coiled, and my balls felt heavy. All from that one stare. I had to do something before I ended up doing something else, something I would forever regret.

“So what college did you attend?” I asked.

“New York University.”

I felt my eyes go wide. NYU was extremely impressive. “Wow. That’s like in the top ten best schools for business. Why in the hell would you settle for a position in the mailroom? You don’t belong there or making coffee.”

“It’s the only place I want to work, so I’ll take whatever they give me.”

“Did you grow up in New York or just go to college there?”

“I grew up in California and moved to New York for college. I graduated and moved here all by myself. I’m not afraid of change so it didn’t bother me. I was used to it. When I went to NYU, I didn’t know anyone and it didn’t bother me. I’m good at making friends.”

“So you moved to Florida for Kauffmann?”

“Yup. Like I said, only place I wanted to work.”

“Why is that the only place you want to work?” I was really interested in her answer.

“They’re just a really good company and they really care about the businesses they save. I read an article once, the one that made me want to work there, about the owner. He took on this small business but couldn’t save it and felt bad so he paid all of the employees out of his own pocket. It convinced me right then and there that I wanted to work for him.”

“Got a little crush on the future boss, huh?”

She blushed and shook her head. The color of her skin changed from creamy to pink and it made my jeans tighten over my left leg. If I were a smart man, I would have gotten up and said goodnight at that very moment. But I wasn’t a smart man. I was a man in desperate need of her attention. It was the first time since I was fifteen years old that I had felt like that. It was the first time in twelve years that I had felt my body have a physical reaction to a facial expression… well, a facial expression outside of the bedroom.

“No. I have no idea who he is. It was the company as a whole that got to me. I didn’t choose Kauffmann because of the owner. I don’t even know anything about him other than that one thing about him giving money to those people.”

“Well, it’s a good thing you don’t have a crush on him because you really shouldn’t sleep with your bosses.”

“You sound like you know from experience. You said you were good at interviews, is that why you have had so many? Got fired too many times for getting dirty with the boss? At least tell me they were female,” she teased. She certainly knew how to give it back and I loved that.

I shook my head, wondering how to even answer that. It wasn’t often a woman could render me speechless, yet she somehow did. “No. I never fucked my boss. Wait… I have, but I can’t talk about that. It’s an ongoing thing. Confidentiality and all that.”

She laughed loudly again, tilting her head back and everything. It made me warm, feverish even. It started in my face and worked its way down. Down to my stomach and lit my insides on fire. Down to my pants, making the tightness in my jeans even worse. If she kept laughing like that, I’d have to go to the bathroom and relieve myself. But I didn’t want her to stop laughing. Even if it meant I would have an erection for the whole bar to see, I didn’t want her to stop.

“So what is it that you do?” she asked again once the laughter died down.

“I do all kinds of things. I don’t stick to one company; I get too bored for that. I think I have ADD when it comes to work so I just keep moving around. I get in, do my thing, and then get out.”

“Do your thing? Like fuck the boss?”

“Hey, if it gets me more money then why not? But no, seriously, I just don’t like to stay in one place too long.”

“So you move around a lot?” she asked as she played with her straw.

“Not move, but I do travel a lot. It’s nice because I get to see new places. I get hired all over the country to do my thing. I can’t complain.”

“Wow. You really are full of yourself.” Her voice was light so I knew she was teasing.

I was used to hearing that, but truth be told, I really wasn’t. I was confident, yeah, but not arrogant. I knew what my attributes were, but I was also knew my weaknesses. I had just learned a new one—Eden. She was definitely a weakness for me.

“Why would you say that?” I was interested in hearing her reasoning.

“You go from job to job to job, and excuse it as you do your thing and get out, that you are just so great at what you do that everyone wants to hire you.”

“I prefer to think they all just want to fuck me, but you can think what you want.”

“And you deny being cocky.”

Even though she didn’t actually say the word, the word cock coming from her tongue made mine twitch against my leg. I was sure by then it looked like I was smuggling something under my jeans, or that I was carrying a weapon of some kind. I wasn’t into bragging about my size, but I knew it would have been noticeable had I stood up. So I didn’t. I stayed exactly where I was even though I was out of beer.

“Look who the cocky one is here. I didn’t move to a state I never lived in before, nor knew anybody, for a job I hadn’t even interviewed for.”

She rolled her eyes at me and I took that opportunity to smile. She really was beautiful no matter what she did. She could have stuck out her tongue like a five-year-old and I still would have thought she was beautiful. And then I would have thought about her tongue.

“Even if I don’t get it, I won’t give up. I’ll just find another job and keep trying.”

“Cocky and persistent. Good qualities,” I teased and watched as she laughed again. I didn’t think my pants could have handled any more of her laughs. “But I honestly don’t think you have to worry about that. I’m pretty sure you’ll get the job, especially after all the help I’ve given you.” I winked at her.

“Yeah, so much help. All you’ve done is tell me to show my tattoos and leave in my piercings. With that advice, I could show up naked,” she said through a soft laugh.

I wasn’t sure what it was that made my balls tighten against my body. Maybe it was her mention of being naked, or that soft, sweet laugh she let out like air leaving her lungs, but whatever it was, I was beginning to really feel pain. It also didn’t help that I began picturing her naked and laughing at the same time. Well, she wasn’t really laughing, more like breathing very heavily.

“You could do that if you wanted to, but I’m sure you’ll end up arrested before you even get to your interview. And I don’t know from experience or anything, but I would assume sitting naked in jail wouldn’t be much fun. You’d also have a record for indecent exposure, and that might hinder your chances of ever getting hired at Kauffmann. So yeah, I would advise against it.”

She brought the straw back to her lips and sucked the last remaining drops from her glass before swirling her ice cubes around. I couldn’t take my eyes off her lips, her mouth, or her tongue that peaked out from time to time. I really needed to get away from her, but the reaction my body was having to all that I noticed of her kept me rooted in my seat.

“But you’re right. I didn’t really give you very much advice, even though what I did give you was pretty solid. So here it goes. Keeping up with your appearance, so we’re not jumping around too much, let’s start with your makeup. Wear it just the way it is now. It’s perfect.” And it was. Her full, pouty, soft lips were teasing. Not to mention that they were bright red, the color of a candy apple that I wanted nothing more than to devour. When she smiled, they brought attention to her flawless, straight teeth and made them look perfectly white.

I had seen women wear that color before and all it did was make them look like dirty whores. But not Eden. Her lips made the color look as it if had been made specifically for her lips and her lips only. No one else should ever wear that shade; they wouldn’t deserve it.

And then there were her eyes. They were lined dark black on the top, but bare on the bottom. Again, it wasn’t the first time I had seen someone wear their eye makeup like that, but it was the first time I didn’t want to hand them a moist towelette and ask them to kindly remove it. I always thought makeup like that should have been reserved for hookers, but she had completely changed my opinion on the matter.

“And your hair—whatever you do, wear it down.”

She looked down at her empty glass and smiled.

“Why do you do that? Every time I give you a compliment, you look down like you’re insecure. Why are you insecure? You have no reason to be.”

She looked back up and into my eyes. “I’m not insecure. I’m shy. There’s a very big difference. You give me compliments that I don’t know how to respond to. That doesn’t mean I’m not confident. Just means I don’t know what to say.”

“You say thank you. And it’s a good thing you’re not insecure. That would be absurd.”

Her eyes never left mine and I saw a spark in them. “Thank you.”

She wanted to smile, but waited until I did before letting the tightness in her lips go. I saw the edges twitch and the light in her eyes brighten, but it wasn’t until I felt my face loosen and my own lips turn up did I see hers do the same. I loved that she smiled when I smiled. I couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. Hell, I couldn’t even remember the last time only I smiled, let alone having it trigger someone else’s.

“It’s getting late and I’m finished with my drink. Any more advice before I leave?”

I felt something at the knowledge that she would be leaving me. I wasn’t sure what it was, but it was unfamiliar. I didn’t want her to go, but I knew she had to. I knew I needed her to.

“Just be you,” was all that I had to give her.

“Thank you, Dane. And I really enjoyed your company tonight.”

“Anytime, Eden. And I know you did. You’ll be talking about it for days with your friends back home. I’m sure of it.” I winked at her and watched her roll her eyes once more before she walked away.

The only thing I was sure about was that I would be thinking about it for days. I knew there was no way I would have been able to not think about it. She erupted feelings within me that I hadn’t felt in eons. She made me have fun for the first time in only God knew how long. And she made me smile. I was sure I didn’t have the ability to do that anymore, but she brought it back out in me. For thirty minutes, I was able to feel like how I used to. I didn’t want it to end, but I knew it had to.

I sat on the stool for a little bit longer until I knew my eagerness for Eden had subsided. I knew I had to go home. I didn’t want to, but I didn’t have any other options. The only thing that got me through was knowing I would see her again. That wasn’t our last encounter. I only hoped it wouldn’t lead me to falling for the temptation that was her.

I barely got to the office on time. I was running so late. It wasn’t because I got home too late from the bar the night before, because I didn’t. And it wasn’t because I had too much to drink, either. It was because I was up all night diverting a crisis.

She was hysterical by the time I stepped foot inside the front door. I did everything I could to be patient, supportive, and calm her down. It didn’t seem like anything worked. Finally, she fell asleep, but it didn’t come that easily for me.

I tossed and turned, feeling the weight of guilt crush me. I felt guilty for flirting with Eden, for being attracted to her. I felt guilty for not wanting to go home, for going to the bar in the first place, knowing how she was when I left for work that morning. But I felt the guiltiest about not being able to be what she needed me to be. For not being able to take away the pain and misery she felt day in and day out.

After almost three hours of sleep, my alarm sounded for work. I quickly turned it off before it woke her up. She needed to sleep. So I quietly got dressed and ready for the office, making it there just in time. I was usually the first one to arrive, but a few people made it in before me.

I had about seventy emails waiting for me once I turned on my computer, but I had a hard time getting into them. I knew there was a file that was silently begging me to open it. It was taunting me to read it. I knew it was there without even having to see it. I tried for as long as I could before opening it. I needed a peek. Just one, quick look.

Eden Lesley Clare, twenty-five years old.

It had all of her credentials in there—her schooling, majors, minors—which were quite impressive—and recommendations from professors at NYU. I still wasn’t sure why she was applying for the public relations department; it seemed like a total waste of her talents, but I wasn’t going to meddle. That’s where she applied to and that’s where she would go, if she were hired that is. I wasn’t going to meddle in that, either. If PR wanted her then great, if not, then I’m sure she’d just try again another time. I didn’t have any room for more guilt.

Just after ten o’clock in the morning, my phone rang. I had a temp for an assistant because I couldn’t seem to keep them. They were either fucking everything up or getting in my personal life too much. No one was ever good enough to stay. I never fired them though, unless I had really good cause. Instead, I just moved them to a different department. I didn’t like knowing someone was out of a job because of me.

She needed me to go home. Apparently, she didn’t get enough sleep. I wasn’t sure what it was, but she was hysterical over the phone and I could barely understand her. I knew she had just woken up and she tended to be like that after the kind of night she had, so I promised to make it home. I told her I had to finish up with some urgent work and then I’d be there with her until she calmed down. It didn’t happen often, that she’d ask me to be with her, but when she did, I was there. I would always be there.

It only took me ten minutes to finish with the email I had been working on. I turned off my computer and started to head out. I don’t know if it was fate or luck or destiny, but just as I got close to the front door, I saw her. Eden Lesley Clare, age twenty-five. She was just as gorgeous during the day as she was at night. My steps halted, my breaths grew shorter, and all I could do was stare.

She didn’t see me, thank God, as I was off to the side by the hallway that led to my office and she was entering the public relations department. I don’t know what spurred me to do so, but I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed.

“Jeff, it’s Dane… Listen, you have an interview that just walked in. Do me a favor; send her away. Don’t even bother interviewing her. Just say you are no longer hiring and leave it as that.”

“Okay,” Jeff dragged out the word.

I knew he wouldn’t argue with me, no one ever did.

I should have left. I should have just walked out the door and gone home like I had promised to do. But I didn’t. Instead, I waited until she walked out of the glass doors into the main lobby. I should have let her walk out those doors. I should have just let her go home. But I didn’t. I walked up behind her, catching the scent of gardenia and it made me remember a time when I was happy.

“You don’t listen very well, do you?” I asked in a husky tone with my lips not too far from her ear. I shouldn’t have done that, either.

She spun around and her eyes went wide as she saw me. Those eyes. They were a dark green, a really dark green. I had never seen eyes like hers before. They were also slightly glassy as if she were holding in her tears until she made it outside. I was an ass for not letting her make it outside. I was an ass for instructing Jeff to not hire her; that was why she was about to cry.

“Following me?” Her words were quiet and restrained, like she didn’t even really want to say them.

I should have just said no and we both would have been on our own ways. But I didn’t.

“Come with me.” I shouldn’t have taken her hand, or led her down the hall to my office, or led her in, or closed the door behind her. But I did.

“What’s going on?” She seemed scared. She should have been. Lord knew I was.

“You didn’t listen to me. I gave you solid advice about how to get the job, and you didn’t listen.” I walked closer to her and lightly touched my fingers to the collar of her white sweater. The closer I got, the stronger the scent of gardenia became.

In my peripheral, I thought she was looking at me, but when I took a chance at looking back at her face, I noticed her eyes were on my mouth. That only made me look at her mouth. They were light and glossy, not a hint of lipstick on them.

I moved my hand up to her chin and I heard her inhale. That one simple act of breathing made me feel hot, like the air suddenly shut off in the dead middle of summer. “I advised you to wear makeup like last night.” My hand kept traveling to her cheekbone. She was barely wearing any eye makeup. No thick liner, no dark powder; only mascara. “Your hair is up. I said whatever you do, wear it down.” My fingers moved over her silky hair. They itched to thread themselves through her tightly pulled back bun and pull on it until her neck was completely exposed.

A knock on the door broke us both from the moment. I had never hated and loved a knock so much in my life. Alex, the temp I was using, came in with a folder. He took one look at us and hurriedly closed the door behind him.

“What is going on? I’m so confused.” Her voice sounded shaken, much like how I felt.

“I need an assistant.” I shouldn’t have said that.

“Okay, then hire one.”

“That’s what I’m doing.” I watched her eyes go wide. Even though she wasn’t wearing very much makeup and her clothes were way more conservative from the night before, she still seemed to have the same effect on me. She still somehow managed to render me stupid without the beer, without the flirty banter, and without those red lips. “I looked over your file. You don’t belong in PR. You are too overqualified. I need someone to help me come up with business plans, cost sheets, risk charts, and execution plans. I want to hire you.” I shouldn’t have done that.

“Me? What is it that you do?”

I smiled and extended my hand to her. She took it, which only send jolts of electricity through my arm and into my chest. I thought I was having a heart attack. I didn’t remember the last time my heart pounded that hard in my chest without the added exertion of either working out or sex.

“Dane Kauffmann, nice to meet you.”

Her hand went stiff and her jaw dropped. Her eyes went big and her breathing failed.

“So, do you want the job?”

“Oh my God,” she whispered before finally shaking her head to clear the shock. “Y—yes, Of course, I want the job. What is it you want me to do? I mean, you run an entire investments company. Why in the hell would you want to hire me as your assistant?”

I smiled and sat down, motioning for her to have a seat as well. “I get very busy and I need some help. I don’t need someone to fetch my mail or make me coffee that I’ll be told has grounds in it because of some lame lie that it’s how the French do it. I still might need a copy or two of your ass, but I’ll let you know when the time comes.” I tried to make her laugh, but she only sat stone cold, frozen in shock. “But I was serious when I said I saw your file and it’s really impressive. I need someone like you by my side.”

“So when you said you do a lot of interviews…”

“You assumed I meant I went on a lot of them. I didn’t lie. I give them often. Hence why I need an assistant. I can’t seem to keep the fuckers around. And I was honest when I said I was very successful at them. Kind of hard not to be when I’m the one in charge.”

“But you said… you said you have sex with your boss.” She whispered the last part.

“I do. Every morning in the shower before work. Dude has some amazing hands,” I said as I held my hands up in front of me.

She threw her head back and laughed. A full on, deep-throated laugh. She shouldn’t have done that. My cock came to life. Things would be very interesting listening to that laugh every day. First order of business, get bigger work pants.

“Oh my God. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.” At least she wasn’t frozen anymore. She was smiling and laughing and the twinkle in her eyes was back. “You just caught me off guard. You have to admit, this is some crazy shit. I just knew you were lying about something. I’m so sorry; I should have never asked that.”

“It’s fine. But I do have to tell you, taking this position would require you to travel some. I will be relying on you and eventually entrusting you with a lot. I was serious when I said I don’t need you to run stupid errands. I need you to do what I do to help me out.”

“Aren’t you scared I’ll end up being better than you and eventually take over the company?”

She amazed me. “The name on the front of the building says Kauffmann Investments. Are you planning on becoming a Kauffmann?”

“I don’t know; do you have any brothers?”

“Nope, just me. If you’re planning on taking over my company, just let me know when to show up for the vows and let me at least consummate the marriage first. A heads-up is all I need.”

She shook her head again. “So full of yourself. I doubt anyone could marry you, seems like you’re in a pretty serious relationship with yourself to allow any room for someone else.”

All I could do was smile. Mentioning marrying someone did nothing but bring the guilt on and squash all the fun I was having. My happiness dulled as I felt the smile fall from my lips. I didn’t want her to notice it, so I decided to ask her some questions. Starting with why she chose investments to begin with.

“I loved that movie
Rain Man
and I wanted to be just like him.”

I wasn’t expecting that. “Which one, Dustin Hoffman or Tom Cruise?”

“Dustin Hoffman.”

“Like you wanted to be Dustin Hoffman or his character from the movie?”

“Raymond, his character.” She said it so matter-of-factly, as if I should have known.

“You know he was autistic, right?”

Her brows scrunched together and her lips pursed. I didn’t know what she was about to say, but I was sure I was going to be eating my words. “You know he was a numbers genius, right?”

“I wasn’t saying anything bad about it, I was just wondering if you knew. I didn’t know if you were saying you wanted to be autistic or what.”

I certainly stuck my foot in my mouth on that one. She looked like she was about to get up and walk out. I wanted to say something, anything to make her understand what I meant, but I didn’t trust myself. I was only digging a deeper hole.

“If God had made me that way then I would have been okay with it. Do I sit here and say I wish I were autistic? No. But had God made me that way, I wouldn’t wish I were any different. People with autism are beautiful, smart people that could probably do your job better than you. They are amazing people that just think differently than you, but people like you are too ignorant to see that.” And she was up, out of her seat.

“Wait. That’s not what I meant. I am not ignorant. I don’t see people by the color of their skin or the genitals between their legs. And I certainly don’t see them for any disease, illness, handicap, or any other classification put upon them. I know what I said sounded ignorant, but please understand that the words just came out wrong. I swear, I meant nothing by it.”