Better Than Chance (20 page)

“It was great to meet you, Jay. I seriously haven’t laughed that hard in… I don’t know. That was fun. Are you game to try it again sometime? Maybe without the swim?” Kelly’s teasing tone let me know she was playing with me.

“Let me get a little practice in first. Maybe in a swimming pool rather than the river next time.”

The minute the door was closed Peter turned toward me. He was wearing a pair of gray sweats that hung low on his hips and a T-shirt that hugged his body just so. His feet were bare and his hair was still slightly damp from our shower earlier. I licked my upper lip, then bit my lower one thoughtfully. Suddenly he was on me, all over me. His hands were in my hair, his mouth was at my neck, then over my jaw before he bit my lips and forced his tongue in my mouth. It was an assault to my body and to my senses. I marveled again at his ability to go from us standing across the room to glued to one another and practically having sex within a minute. For that matter, I was surprised by my body’s burning response to him. Peter was magnetic. I couldn’t deny him what we both craved.

We made love on the small sofa in the living area. I say “made love” because that’s how it felt. As hungry as our joining started, by the time we were naked and ready to go, Peter slowed the tempo. He entered me slowly, staring deeply into my eyes. When he rocked his hips into me, moving within my body, he kept his gaze fixed on mine. He was speaking to me through this physical act. It was sublime and almost magical.

I fell asleep in his arms and woke up with my sweaty head plastered to his chest a short while later. He looked down at me and kissed my forehead, brushing my hair out of the way.

“How are you, baby? It’s been a rough day.” He grinned and gave me a small wink.

“A bit rougher for you by the looks of that bruise on your forehead.” I traced my fingers gently over the slightly raised bump above his left eye. “I’m really sorry about that and the tipping the kayak part too.”

Peter’s smile was wide as he hugged my body tightly to his and kissed my head again.

“Don’t be. Kelly’s right. It was fun.”

“You don’t think they’re worried about me being a total dweeb, then?”

Peter chuckled softly.

“No. They liked you.”

“Cool. I liked them too.” I shifted my weight off of his chest and looked for the sweat pants he’d given me to borrow. I made a show of getting redressed when I asked my next question.

“So you have plans tonight?” I asked as nonchalantly as possible.

Silence.

Inwardly I rolled my eyes. The guy was a tad high-maintenance. I looked over my shoulder at him and caught his smile. He was sprawled out naked on the loveseat with his flaccid penis lying gracefully between his legs. Fuck, he was insanely hot.

“No. Do you?” He finally answered.

“What?”

“Have plans?”

“Oh right. Um. Nothing set. I haven’t checked my phone but… why aren’t you going to your friend’s barbecue tonight, then?”

Peter tilted his head to the side as though thinking about how to answer my nosey question. He didn’t look bothered one way or another.

“I just don’t feel like it.”

“Is it ‘complicated’?” I teased. I tried to go for lighthearted, but I knew I was crossing a line by asking in a way.

“Not really. The truth is… I’d rather be with you.”

I gulped audibly and bit at the inside of my cheek. No words were necessary. It’s what I wanted too.

8

A
PATTERN
began to form over the next few weeks as spring gave way to the humid, sultry months of summer. Peter and I rarely crossed paths at work. He traveled a lot, and my new project kept me busy. During the week, we usually found a way to spend time together. But more and more often we began to see each other at least one day over the weekend as well. Most of the time it was a Friday night. We would have dinner together, sleep together, and spend Saturday morning doing something. Usually it was exercise of some sort. A trip to the gym or a game of tennis. We even went back out to the river to try kayaking again, and I managed to pull my weight paddling without injuring my partner and capsizing our boat.

Peter always seemed to have new ideas of things to do. One morning, he decided I needed to make amends for my atrocious coffee-making, though he hadn’t had a sip of my less than savory brew in a while. I knew it was a ruse to get me to do something he knew I probably wasn’t excited to try.

“I’ll let you make it up to me.”

“Oh really? What did you have in mind?

“Something physical.” His eyes were twinkling playfully. “But not what your dirty mind is thinking.”

“And what is my dirty mind thinking?”

“Sex, sex, sex. Am I wrong?”

I put on my best “let me think about it” face as though I were quietly considering his question.

“No, you’re correct,” I conceded.

Peter laughed out loud. He stood suddenly and pulled me to my feet in one graceful motion. I stepped into his arms, holding him in a light embrace around his middle. He sighed heavily before wrapping his arms around me tightly, nearly squeezing the breath out of me. I pushed away from him and gave him an evil glare.

“Have you ever gone rock climbing?” he asked conversationally.

“Huh?”

“Rock climbing. You know, like at a gym that’s specifically for that purpose.”

“And that purpose would be for… rock climbing?”

“Yeah!”

We considered each other quietly while I wordlessly told him I had never done such a thing nor was I particularly interested.

“It’s fun.” He gave me a lopsided grin, which should have warned me that a challenge was about to be issued.

“I’m sure. Well, have fun, then.” I turned away from him and headed back toward my kitchen, making a big production of washing my hands.

“We will. Come on, chicken. You can do it,” he taunted.

“Chicken? Did you really just call me a chicken?” He nodded, still grinning like a madman. “How old are you again?”

“Hmm. Classic sign of avoidance is changing the topic. I guess that’s my answer,” he singsonged.

“I’m not avoiding anything. I’m simply pointing out that name calling is a tad immature.”

“I apologize. I’ll rephrase my subtle inquiry into a direct inquiry. Better?”

“What’s with you and your fixation with all things grammatical?” I put my hand on my hip indignantly.

“Evasive. See? But let me address your point quickly. Grammar and flow are important when you are trying to convey a message. Particularly when said message is attached to eight-digit dollar signs.
Capisce
?”

“So you’re saying I don’t get my point across clearly?”

“Not at all. I’m just asking if you’d like to go rock climbing.”

We’d come full circle. At least I thought we had. Truthfully, I wasn’t sure what our verbal sparring had accomplished other than me agreeing to do something I’d never tried outside of my seven-year-old nephew’s birthday party at one of those bouncy warehouse places with the miniature wall for the super beginner set. I had an uneasy feeling the wall would be a fuck of a lot taller where Peter wanted us to go.

Of course I went, and it was scary at first but more than anything, it was fun. We laughed the entire afternoon. I looked ridiculous in the safety gear get-up and even more ridiculous when I fell time and time again. Thank goodness the walls were padded because I wouldn’t have survived climbing actual rocks out in the open. On the drive back to my place later that day I stole a glance at my smiling companion. He was wearing a silly grin on his sinfully handsome face. It was the same grin he’d sported all day. He caught me staring and asked what was on my mind.

“That was fun. Thanks.”

Peter’s eyes twinkled, and his smile widened. He was obviously quite pleased with my admission. He didn’t say anything at first. He just picked up my hand and kissed my palm before twining our fingers together, resting them between our seats. We held hands all the way home. That was when I knew my fall was imminent.

M
Y
FRIENDS
began to notice something was up. They would throw out the occasional teasing word or two about wanting to meet my new beau, but Aaron was the one who delved a little deeper. He was worried, and he had no qualms letting me know how he felt.

Aaron was at my place early one Sunday morning trying to drag me out for a run before the heat made outdoor exercise close to unbearable. My cell phone rang just as I finished tying my shoes. It was Peter. We had spent Friday night and most of the day Saturday together. It was unexpected for him to call again so soon… but not unwelcome. I know I had a stupid smile on my face when I answered my phone. And it was probably even bigger and more idiotic-looking when I hung up. He was just calling to say hello and let me know he was leaving on a business trip that afternoon. He said he’d call me when he got home midweek.

“I’m ready!” I set my phone down and flashed a bright grin at my friend.

Aaron leaned against the island with his arms crossed over his chest. He obviously had something to say.

“Let’s go. I know you’re dying to grill me. We may as well get our run in while you’re at it.”

My normally chatty friend didn’t say a word, which should have alerted me that trouble was brewing. As we stood outside stretching, I filled the silence with silly observances about the weather and my neighbors’ flowerbeds. I began to go on about the lack of parking on my street as we started a slow pace in the direction of Rock Creek Park, but Aaron took over.

“Cool it, Jaybird. I don’t give a shit about the parking. Tell me what’s going on with your part-time lover.”

“You care plenty when you can’t find a place to park!” I stalled, hoping to infuse the discussion with a dose of levity.

Aaron shot me his best “quit the bullshit” look, and I felt more than a little sorry for the worry I saw there too. He was my closest friend and confidant. I had plenty of other friends, many I’d known a lot longer than Aaron. But he was special to me. We looked out for each other and seemed to understand the other seamlessly. He didn’t get this arrangement or quasi-relationship I had with Peter, though. I knew his eyes were clouded with concern under his classic Ray-Ban sunglasses.

“What do you want to know?” I sighed deeply and vowed to concentrate on my breathing. Aaron was a true runner, not a “sometimes for exercise if I don’t feel like going to the gym” type like me. That meant he could talk, run, and not be winded in the slightest. If he really felt the need to lecture me, I’d be in trouble.

“Just tell me what’s going on. I saw your sappy smile when he called you this morning, and I’ve noticed some… I don’t know… changes since you’ve started seeing him, and I—”

“What do you mean? What kind of changes?” I interrupted. I tried to think if I’d been acting peculiar lately.

“You’re falling for him, Jay. And that worries me.”

I sputtered and started to deny it, but what was the point? He was right. I was falling for Peter Morgan.

“Look… Jay, I’m your best friend and I care that…. I don’t want to see you get hurt, honey. That’s all.”

“I know. I… I really like him. He’s got this carefree fun side that no one we work with would have the slightest clue about. And I….”

“That’s just it. Honey, you work together, whether or not you’re physically working on a project. And let me clarify that I mean in the office not the bedroom.”

“Ha-ha.”

“Jay, it was one thing when it was sex only, but this is turning into more than that. At least on your side. Where do you see this going?”

It was a good question. I hadn’t thought that far ahead, which was unusual for me. The truth was that I had gotten used to letting Peter set the pace. I’d been going along with what he was comfortable giving, possibly to the extent that I hadn’t thought about my own concerns. That was not like me in the slightest. No wonder Aaron was worried. I cast a look in his direction as we continued jogging along L Street toward the park.

“I don’t know, A. But I don’t think I’m ready to confront him about his intentions either.”

“Intentions? Jay, at the risk of pissing you off, I’m going to be frank here. His intentions are to get laid on a regular basis. Period. He is smokin’ hot, and if you’re out for the same thing… namely sex, then there is no problem. But you’re starting to get all moony about how he’s showing you a side he doesn’t show anyone else, and that’s—”

He stopped abruptly and pulled gently at my arm so I would do the same.

“Jay, you’re my best friend. I don’t want to be a downer. I want you to enjoy your hunky boss, but I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

I took a deep breath and looked away from him for a moment. When I turned back he’d pulled his sunglasses down to give me a goofy-eyed stare and break the tension. I chuckled at his antics as we both slipped back into running mode, leaving unpleasant thoughts behind. But the seed was sown. He was right and I knew it. Peter wasn’t boyfriend material. He seemed perfectly capable of filling that role, but something was stopping him.