Between The Sheets (38 page)

'Ryan, why don't we go home and talk about this?' Dana said quietly. She was aware that they were suddenly the centre of attention and that a couple of people had recognized her. Why had she dressed up tonight? And why had she let Ryan take her to one of the swankiest new restaurants in the city? She'd probably end up in the bloody papers again.

Ryan leaned forward and gazed into her eyes. 'Why? Are you going to change your mind? Are you going to take me to bed? Are you going to do that thing you do—'

'Ryan, stop!' she hissed.

'Sorry.' He spoke even louder. 'Am I embarrassing you?'

'Yes. Yes, you are.' Dana shook her head sadly and picked up her bag. 'I'm sorry it had to end like this.'

'Don't you dare walk out on me,' Ryan warned her.

The maitre d' was immediately at her side. 'Is every-thing okay,
madame?'

'Yes, I think so.' Dana stood up. 'Goodbye, Ryan,' she said and walked quickly towards the door.

'Ms De Lacey?' The maitre d' was hot on her heels. 'If you like, you can use the side entrance. I took the liberty of calling a taxi.'

'Oh, thank you.' Dana smiled gratefully. 'And please, look after him, won't you? He's not normally like this.'

'I'll make sure he gets home safely,' he promised.

'Thank you.' Dana slipped out through the door and into the waiting car.

Ed looked up in surprise when he heard the key in the door. It wasn't even ten o'clock. He went out into the hall to see Dana leaning against the door, her eyes closed. 'Dana?'

She opened her eyes. 'Oh, Ed, what a disaster.'

'He didn't take it well, then?'

She shook her head and kicked off her high heels. 'It was awful. He turned into a completely different person.'

'Did he hurt you?' Ed started.

'No. No, of course he didn't. He just got upset. The head waiter was fantastic, though. He got me out of the restaurant and into a taxi before Ryan knew what was happening.'

'Well, if he turns up here, I'll be ready for him,' Ed assured her.

'Great, thanks.' Dana started up the stairs. 'I'm going for a nice long bath. I need to relax after that.'

'Don't you want your phone messages first?' Ed teased.

She turned to look at him. 'Gus called?'

'He certainly did.'

'Damn. What did you tell him?'

'That you were at a work do, of course.'

'Oh, bless you.' She blew him a kiss. 'So what did he say?'

'That he'd call you tomorrow. I told him that you were out in the afternoon so he should phone in the morning.'

Dana frowned. 'I don't have anything on tomorrow.'

Ed rolled his eyes. 'I know that. But you don't want to spend the day on tenterhooks waiting for his call, do you?'

'Good thinking.' She laughed. 'Were you talking to him for long?'

'Not long. He just asked how you got on today and I said you were fine.'

'Great. Thanks, Ed,' she called over her shoulder as she went up to her room.

'No problem. Just call me your fairy godfather.'

It was eleven-thirty when Gus called. Dana had been up since eight. She was about to pounce on the phone, but Ed wagged his finger and answered it instead.

'Hi, Gus, how are you? Good. Yeah, hang on, she's around somewhere.' And he held the receiver to his chest refusing to give it to Dana until he'd counted to twenty. Finally he handed it over and she turned her back on her brother, and went out to the conservatory.

'Hello?'

'Hi, Dana, it's me.'

'Oh, hi, Gus.'

'How are you feeling?'

'Pretty good.'

'That's great. I'm glad.'

'Gus, can we—'

'I just wanted to—'

They both started talking at once and laughed, self-consciously.

'You first,' Gus said.

'I wanted to ask you to come over for a chat. There are some things I need to tell you. I realize that you're probably busy—'

'No, actually, I'm free right now. Tom's back so the pressure is off.'

'Oh. Great. What were you going to say?' Dana prompted.

'The same. I have something I want to tell you.'

Dana felt her stomach flip. He wanted a divorce. He was going to marry his journalist.

'Dana?'

'Yes, okay. Why don't you come right over? I'll put on some coffee.'

'I'm on my way.'

Dana went back out to the hall and put the phone down. Immediately, Ed appeared from the kitchen. 'Well?'

'He's on his way over.'

'That's brilliant.' Ed smiled at her and then frowned at the worried look on her face. 'What's wrong?'

'He says he has something to tell me.'

'That's not surprising. You have a lot to talk about,' Ed reminded her.

'No, it's his choice of words,' Dana argued. 'He didn't say he wanted to discuss something or that he wanted to have a chat. He said he wanted to tell me something.'

'For goodness sake, Dana, you're being pedantic. He's coming over, that's all that matters. Are you still planning on giving him the manuscript to read?'

She nodded. 'Yes. I'd better go and print it off. Would you put on some coffee, Ed?'

'Sure. And do you want me to stay for moral support or will I disappear?'

'Disappear, I think. But -' she shot him a nervous look — 'don't go too far, will you?'

He gave her a quick hug. 'I'll go and do the shopping. You phone me if you need me and I'll be back here in five.'

Dana was upstairs when her phone beeped. She picked it up to check who the text was from. It was Ryan. With some trepidation, she opened the message.

DANA, FORGIVE ME? ME HAPPY. X RYAN

She smiled as she sent him back a message.

THANKS, RYAN. YOU TOO.

She didn't add a kiss. No point in confusing the issue. But she was glad that he'd contacted her and they'd made their peace.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Gus's car pulling into the driveway. She checked her appearance, took some slow, deep breaths and went downstairs. Though he'd let himself in the gate, Gus rang the doorbell and waited patiently for her to let him in.

'You still have a key,' she reminded him, as she opened the door.

He raised an eyebrow. 'And you think I'd use it after the last time?'

She smiled and led the way into the kitchen.

'You look well,' he said as she busied herself with mugs.

'Thanks.'

'It must be a relief to have the cast off.'

She nodded as she set the coffee down and fetched milk. 'It is.'

'Dana?' He waited for her to meet his eyes before he continued. 'I'm so sorry.'

She swallowed and smiled. 'What for?'

He threw up his hands. 'Everything? It's hard to know where to start.'

'Yes.'

'I found your letters.'

'I know. Ed told me.'

'It felt as if I was married to a stranger. And then when I read the one to your son—' He shook his head. 'I imagined this whole other relationship you must have had, that you deliberately hid from me. I thought you were living a double life — visiting this boy somewhere, possibly even seeing the father.'

'You should have asked me,' Dana said.

'I know. But any time I'd asked you about your past, you had shut me down. I'm afraid this was the final straw.'

She nodded. 'I understand.'

He looked at her. 'You do?'

She laughed. "Is it that much of a surprise?'

'Just a bit,' he admitted.

'The letters that you found were part of a therapy I did after Mum died.'

'Was this when you were being treated for depression?'

'Yes,' she told him. 'Walter talked me into it. I was very down and on the road to self-destruction. He thought it was because of Mum, and it was, to a certain extent. But having the abortion was what I really found hard to live with. I was tormented by it day and night and Mum was the only one I could talk to. When she died—' Dana stopped, as she felt the tears bubble up inside her.

'It's okay. If this is too hard for you to talk about—'

'No.' She pulled a tissue from the pocket of her jeans and blew her nose. 'I have to talk about it. It's still a new experience for me, though, and I usually end up blubbering.'

'That's allowed,' he said softly.

'Anyway, when Mum died, I fell apart. I went home for the funeral to find Ed there and he and Dad were bosom buddies — or so it seemed. It was, to use your phrase, the last straw.'

'And you never talked to anyone about what happened?'

'Yes. Obviously Judy knew and then, a year or so later, Dr Corcoran. I went off the straight and narrow for a while. I dropped out of college and drank too much.' She shrugged. 'But when my first book was published, I suddenly realized that I had something to hold on to. I had something that was just mine, and no one could take it away from me. In the two years after Mum died, I wrote two books. Writing saved my life. When I was working, I was too involved in my storylines to think about all that I had lost. And then because things were working out so well, and Gretta was thrilled with my work, they started bringing me over there for promotions. It was wonderful. I couldn't believe the attention people paid to me; how complimentary they were.' She rolled her eyes, smiling. 'You know the Americans. They never do anything by halves. But I would probably still be a hermit if it wasn't for Wally. He was often in Dublin and he always insisted I partnered him to any of the events he was attending. And so I had a new life. He made sure I got some publicity here even though I wasn't published in Ireland. He was always thinking ahead.'

'And will
The Mile High Club
be published here?'

She shook her head. 'No. But then you must have suspected that after Walter's drunken phone call.'

He smiled. 'You heard about that. I've never heard Wally so furious. He obviously blames me for this. I'm sorry, Dana, if that's true.'

'I'm not. I'm ready to move on and try my hand at something different.'

'You weren't until I messed things up. If it wasn't for me, that book would be launching Passion over here, wouldn't it? And you'd be getting the recognition you've always wanted.'

'I'm rather embarrassed by that goal now,' she admitted. 'In fact my entire career is a bit of a joke.'

'Don't say that! You've worked damn hard to become so successful and you should be proud of yourself. I'm proud of you,' Gus added.

'But I did it for all the wrong reasons,' she explained.

'We've both made mistakes, Dana, but everyone does. That's life. My mistake was not trusting you. I'm sorry for that.'

'No. I should have told you everything from the start,' Dana protested.

His lips twitched. 'Are we going to argue over who's more to blame?'

She shook her head. 'No. I've had my fill of arguments.'

'Me too.'

'I have something for you.' She stood up and went out of the door. Moments later she reappeared and handed him a thick manuscript. 'This is my story. It starts when I was a child and finishes with the publication of my first book. I'd like you to read it. Maybe it will explain why I'm the annoying, frustrating person I am today.'

Gus took it from her and set it on the table. He raised his eyes to hers. 'Ed has told me some of the story.'

'I know that. But this is from my perspective.'

'Please don't feel you have to show it to me—'

'I want to, Gus, okay?'

He nodded and smoothed his hand over the front page. 'Thank you. So, what now?'

She wasn't sure if he meant for them or for her and her career. She decided it was safer to assume the latter. 'Walter and Ed think I should publish this or adapt it into a novel. I'm not so sure.'

'You have to do what works for you,' he counselled. 'But remember, Dana. If you do publish it, once it's out there, you can't take it back.'

'No,' she agreed.

'It's been an eventful few months for you.'

'And you,' she retorted.

He smiled in acknowledgement. 'So, this new guy—'

'Ryan?' Dana said and her heart skipped a beat at the pained look that crossed her husband's face.

'Is it serious? Is he going to be a permanent fixture in your life?'

'No. It's over.'

He looked up, his eyes searching hers. 'Really?'

She nodded. 'And your ... relationship?'

'Terry and I have split up.'

Dana stared at him. 'Really?'

'Really. So, where does that leave us?'

Her eyes returned to the book in front of him.

'There's still a lot to talk about. But I'd really like you to read this first, is that okay?'

He nodded and stood up.

She watched him in disappointment. 'Oh. Do you have to go so soon?'

He picked up the book and shoved it under his arm. 'I have some reading to do. The sooner I get finished, the sooner I get back.' He reached out his hand and touched her cheek.

The impulse to turn and kiss his fingers was huge, but Dana settled for covering his hand with hers.

'I'll be in touch.' He stood smiling at her for a moment, and then turned to leave.

Dana stood watching until the gate closed after Gus, and the noise of his engine became indistinguishable from the other traffic. Reluctantly, she closed the door and went into her office. There was a note on her keyboard reminding her to call Walter. He would probably have told Gretta the bad news by now. That not only was
The Mile High Club
rubbish, but that Dana wouldn't be writing any more books for Peyton Publishing. Dana wasn't too worried about Gretta, though. As Walter said, she was sure to have a Plan B up her sleeve. She just hoped the editor hadn't given Wally a hard time. Dana should have had the guts to deal with the woman herself, but she hadn't trusted herself to say the right things. Wally hadn't either.

She picked up the phone and, moments later, was put through to her agent. 'Hi, Wally.'

'Dana, darling, how are you?'

'I'm fine. You? Did you talk to Gretta?'

He groaned. 'Oh, Dana, that woman is impossible.'

'She didn't take it well, then?'

'That's an understatement. Still, she was more annoyed with me than you. Deservedly so, I suppose,' he acknowledged. 'She said I should have come clean as soon as I suspected you were in trouble.'