Beyond Tantra: Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex (24 page)

Man: Withdraw Jade Stalk almost completely out of Yoni. Move in until just the head of Jade Stalk is inside Yoni and then withdraw almost all the way out again. That is one ‘short’ stroke. Do this nine times at a rate of about one stroke a second. Keep your PC muscle relaxed during all nine strokes. Then, inhale and on the exhalation slide Jade Stalk all the way into Yoni. This is the ‘long’ stroke.

Let Jade Stalk stay all the way in and inhale, squeeze your PC muscle and do a Small Orbit Sexual Qi circulation with your partner in the same way as in the non-moving exercise. Relax for ten seconds or so.

Woman:
At the end of the long stroke inhale together with your partner, squeeze your PC muscle and do a Small Orbit with your partner.

Both partners:
Repeat the set of ‘nine short and long’ three, six or nine

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Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex times. Then change to the ‘woman on top’ position. This time it’s the woman who does the ‘nine short and one long’ movement and the man stays still. We found that three series of nine times ‘nine short and one long’ in three different positions works well and takes about fifteen minutes to do. These instructions are not set in stone, i.e. be creative and find out what works for both of you.

Ejaculation should be avoided just the same as in the non-moving exercise.

Finish up with a Hui Yin point massage and a ‘Yoni hold’.

Note: Even though you may use the same exercise (moving and/or non-moving) you will notice that, over time, your ability to generate and manage your Sexual Qi will change. The day will come when, quite unexpectedly, orgasmic energy will flow through your entire body when you are seemingly doing very little to call it forth. Simply enjoy it and gather up the Sexual Qi with your awareness and circulate it around and through both of you.

If you wish, you can consciously direct this orgasmic energy with your mind to any part of your (or your partner’s) body that needs healing attention. Just as in the Small Orbit exercise, you simply visualize gathering your Sexual Qi into a ball of light and guide it with your mind to the relevant location and hold your awareness there for a few seconds. It’s the world’s tastiest medicine.

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The Understanding

A good traveller has no fixed plans,

and is not intent on arriving.

—Lao Tzu

Valley Orgasms are orgasms that take place when the body and mind are relaxed.

They are one of the most effective ways to generate and direct Sexual Qi between partners. By not focusing on orgasmic climax as the intent of your love-making, you can pay more attention to the ‘space in between’ where Sexual Qi can flow of its own accord.

The Background

What is an orgasm? It’s the peak of sexual arousal when all the muscles that were
tightened during sexual arousal relax, causing a very pleasurable feeling that may
involve the whole body.

—From a teen web site

I suspect that for many people the above quote is probably a fairly accurate

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Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex description of what they experience when they reach a (or the) climax in a lovemaking session. In addition, most men have an ejaculation at the same time as their orgasm. In fact, many men think that orgasm and ejaculation are the same thing. This description of orgasm also matches up pretty well with the biologically hard-wired excite / stimulate / release cycle that ensures that a man can impregnate his partner. From a Dual Cultivation point of view, there are a number of problems with this hard-wired behaviour:

• The potent charge of Sexual Qi that is built up in a man during the excitement and stimulation phases is lost from his body by ejaculation, together with the healing energy it contains.

• Many couples find it difficult to synchronize the excitement and stimulation stages of lovemaking as men tend to excite more quickly than women. This often means that the man has an orgasm and the woman doesn’t.

• The Sexual Qi generated by the orgasm flows through a body that is tense with excitement. As a result, the orgasm is often confined to the genital area (especially in men).

• The orgasm, especially for men, is most often a ‘once per love-making session’ event. This means that there is no opportunity to ‘raise the vibration’ or ‘refine’ the Sexual Qi (more about this below).

Here is a graphical representation of a ‘normal’ love-making session: male excitement phase

male ejaculation

female excitement phase

female orgasm

5 min

10 min

15 min

20 min

This graphs shows, in a snapshot, the all-too-familiar, hard-wired excitement cycle that so many couples have experienced. The man becomes excited quickly, lasts for one to maybe ten minutes, ejaculates and then rolls over and falls asleep.

Most women, on the other hand, need between fifteen and twenty minutes to get excited, so just as they are getting warmed up he is falling asleep. You don’t

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Valley Orgasms – The Background

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need to be a trained sexologist to realize that this is not a recipe for sexual relationship bliss!

The Taoist adepts discovered that if you modify this hard-wired behaviour you can:

• Retain the Sexual Qi in the body and use it for healing and energy gain. By doing this, the amount of Sexual Qi lost by the man is significantly reduced when he does finally ejaculate.

• Synchronize the man and the woman’s excitement and stimulation phases so that both partners reach their orgasmic climax simulta-neously.

• Experience whole-body orgasm by allowing the Sexual Qi to spread through a relaxed body.

• Enjoy multiple orgasms per love-making session by separating ejaculation and orgasm. This allows the couple to refine or raise the vibration of their Sexual Qi.

Here is a diagram of a Dual Cultivation love-making session: joint

excitement

valley

phase

joint

orgasm

excitement

valley

phase

orgasm

10 min

20 min

30 min

40 min

This couple made sure that the woman had a nice Yoni Massage first. This gave her a chance to get nicely warmed up so that, when her partner was ready to start making love, her excitement level matched his. As they practised some Nine Short and One Long strokes (more about this in the exercise), they felt their Sexual Qi level rising. When they sensed that they were about 80% of the way to the man’s ‘point of no return’ they stopped their strokes and relaxed while circulating Qi between each other. After a few minutes they started again but from a much higher level of Sexual Qi than before. Some Taoist texts state that

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Beyond Tantra – Healing Through Taoist Sacred Sex if they can repeat this process seven times, the couple will be enlightened.

Personally, we can’t verify the enlightenment aspect but what we can say is that an incredible amount of Sexual Qi is generated that can be used in very positive ways.