Blood Beyond Darkness (5 page)

Eli led us through the maze of dense woods. The connections I usually had with the earth were now vacant holes in me. It was like visiting an old friend, and finding you no longer had anything in common. The connection you had at one time was gone. It hurt my heart.

Eli sniffed the air and altered direction. Silently, I stayed on his tail. When he stopped, I almost plowed into the back of him. He jerked his head, sniffing again. He turned to his right, climbing over the trunk of a fallen tree. Eli scrambled toward a heap of flesh on the ground. “West? Oh, fuck, brother.”

A gasp escaped me. The skinny lump of bones on the ground looked like a shell of what West had been when we first met. Eli grasped his shoulder and tenderly rolled him onto his back. West looked even worse than I remembered from the last dreamwalk. His clothes were soiled with soot, blood, and fecal matter. Excess fabric hung off his emaciated body.

West’s head rolled, facing me. Blood dribbled down his chin as he groaned in pain. His neck was shredded with both fresh cuts and old wounds. His eyes were sunken and unfocused.

“Hey. I’m here. You’re gonna be all right,” Eli said gently to West, his large hand holding West’s head. To see such softness in Eli was always jarring. He loved his family fiercely. And privately. Even though I was a part of them, it angered me to see a warm side of him after what happened with Aisling. I wanted to hate him—with every fiber I had left in me. I did not want to struggle with my feelings. I wanted, I
needed
, to despise him.

West’s mouth moved, but his voice was too low for me to understand. “What?” Eli leaned down putting his ear to West’s mouth. West muttered something causing Eli to lean back and laugh. “Good to see some things don’t change.”

“What did he say?” I ventured closer to the boys.

Eli’s head turned and his eyes pierced deeply into mine, causing my breath to hitch. “He said it took me long enough, and the least I could have done was bring some water fairies to give him a sponge bath.”

I guffawed. “Yeah, he can’t even lift his head ... at least not the one on his shoulders.”

A gurgled snort came out from West. “I’ve missed you, too,
darlin'.” Every word sounded choked, garbled, and torture for him to get out.

I couldn’t help but smile. West definitely possessed the charm of the group. None of them lacked women’s attentions, but West, with his southern accent and rugged looks, had panties dropping by the truck load. Interestingly, he had only lived in the south a short time, but he knew the accent drew in the ladies.

Bays and yips of dogs resonated through the forest. I stilled. They were still far off, but I could tell they were moving our way.

“Shit!” I leaped to Eli and West. “We
gotta go.”

“This is gonna hurt, brother, but we need to get you out of here.” Eli slid his arms underneath him. West’s face twisted in pain as Eli gathered him up into his arms, carrying him like a baby.

“What do you need me to do?” I looked at Eli.

“I won’t be able to shift since my attention is on keeping him alive.” Eli adjusted
West again. West groaned, his eyes fluttered shut, and his head lolled to the side. “I need you to be the leader and scout. Be fully tuned into your senses. The Fay may not be able to smell us, but their dogs will.”

I swallowed nervously. “They’re cute little doggies, right?”

“Not quite. They aren’t like the dogs on Earth. These dogs are much larger and have stronger senses and teeth. Like an Irish Wolfhound on steroids.”

“Great.” I plastered a fake smile on my face. “Awesome.”

“And they are extremely fast. Let’s go.”

I closed my eyes briefly and called to the Dark Dweller in me. Not needing to fight all my other powers, it rushed to the surface eagerly. I whipped around and let every sound and smell of the forest wash over me. I bounded forward, sniffing the air. A strong dog-like odor came from my left, cutting the trail we made coming here. The soldiers were dividing us. My family and friends stood on one side, and Eli, West, and I were on the other. It was a risk, but I decided we should circle around slipping behind them. They would continue to move forward and not back from where they came, right?
Oh, jeez. Please, let me be right.

Without a word, Eli followed my lead. West had passed out, his body dead weight in Eli’s arms. Even as malnourished as
West was, he still wasn’t a small guy. Eli’s strength was beyond reproach, and he didn’t seem too bothered by the weight. He was more upset by the actual cargo he carried. His face was stone, but he rushed forward, anxious to keep West alive.

Smells and voices forced me to widen my circle. My stomach knotted with tension. Every step we took was mine to decide, as well as the outcome. I hated the weight it placed on my shoulders. This pressure and anxiety must be how Eli and Cole felt every day.

I stopped dead as a strong scent infiltrated my nose. I turned to look at Eli. His shoulders went taut, curling forward, and a low growl rolled from his throat.

Eyes were on me. I could feel them. I twirled in a circle, my gaze wandering every inch of the forest. Eli sniffed. He was about to place West on the ground when a large mass lurched from the woods, diving for his throat. Both men and the animal crashed to the dirt. West’s body rolled, limp as he hit the earth.

I leaped onto the back of the large dog. Its wiry hair rubbed against my skin like sandpaper. I clung to it and wrapped my arms and legs around it. Eli was busy trying to keep its jaws from clamping on his neck. I clutched my hands around the dog’s throat and snapped its head back. It wiggled enough so I didn’t break its neck, but we both fell. It rolled on top of me and crushed the breath out of my lungs. Its teeth bit and chomped at the air as it tried to reach my face and neck. Teeth grazed my cheek, followed by a warm burning sensation in my face. The weight of the dog pinned my body in place, and I could not move. My lids shut in self-defense. A piercing yelp assaulted my eardrums. My eyes opened to see Eli standing above me, the dog in his hands. With a quick twist of his arm he broke the animal’s neck. It went limp in his arms before he tossed it to the side.

I sighed and let my head fall back onto the dirt.

“Come on. We’ve got to go.” Eli squatted beside me.

I sat up, feeling dazed and dizzy.

“Jesus, Brycin. You’re bleeding again.” He took his sleeve to my cheek, wiping at the gash.

I jerked away and stood.

He looked at the ground, slowly letting out a huge breath. His shoulders went rigid, and his expression turned to ice as he stood. “Let’s move.” He picked up West.

We had only traveled ten minutes when I detected another odor. Human. Joy filled me. It smelled like Mark. Old Spice. But now his cologne mingled with a new smell. Fae magic—like the air before a thunderstorm, dense and heavy mixed with fresh rain and earth. There was also sweetness in it—a dash of honey or vanilla. His body was starting to digest the Fae food. Like Ryan, he would get sick as his body took in the foreign substance. We had to get him to safety before his system reacted to the alien element. He would be a lot harder to travel with if we also had to carry him.

Lars was the first to find us. The relief in his eyes quickly changed to anger. The rest of the group shadowed behind.

“Oh, crap on ash bark. Thank goodness.” Mom put her hand on her chest, letting out a liberated breath. I could tell she struggled not to run to me, but my guarded expression kept her at arm’s length.

Mark didn’t have the same problem; he pulled me into a bear hug, kissing my hairline. “Please don’t run off again. You scared me and your mother half to death
...” Mark trailed off realizing what he said. He stepped back and cleared his throat nervously as he glanced at Lily. Clearly, he didn’t know where he stood on the question of my parentage either. What a screwed up mess my family was.

In the distance, a siren of wailing howls and a frenzy of barking circled us. We froze. By the closeness and the desperate tone of the dogs, I could tell they’d caught our scent. They were coming for us.

“Rimmon, you and Ori head south,” Lars said to the two men before pointing at the other bird-shifter. “Deryn, you take Koke and Alki and head east. Castien, you know what you need to do ... follow the river northwest from here. Lily, decide now whom you want to go with.” He nodded toward her. “Let’s hope our strategy divides and confuses them.”

Castien herded Mark and Ryan away.

“Wait. What?” My voice was frantic.

“Castien and I planned the escape thoroughly. They will be fine.” Lars’ body already leaned impatiently in the direction he wanted us to go. The anxiety of separating from Mark and Ryan drilled into my gut.

Another set of high-pitched howls bounded off the rocks and trees around us. They were closer. Everyone strode in their appointed direction except Mom, Mark, Ryan, and me.

“I got them, Ember. Go!” Castien waved me on.

My toes bobbed up and down, still hesitant to leave. Mark’s light blue eyes looked pained as he peered back and forth between me and his wife. It stopped me completely and started me moving toward him.
No! I can’t leave him or Ryan again.

“Ember, we have to run! They will be fine. I promise.” Lars pushed my shoulder to get me moving. Eli had stopped and anxiously looked back at me. Mom did not move at all, her gaze going from Mark to me. Her face was pinched in a frown.

“I can’t. I will go with them,” I insisted.

“No,” Lars bellowed. “Even though she has your powers, she still wants you, Ember. She wants you gone and won’t stop until your death is accomplished. It is not safe for you to stay in the Otherworld.”

“It’s not safe for me anywhere.” I gritted my teeth. “And if it’s not safe for me, it’s not safe enough for them.”

“The difference is they cannot leave.” Lars’ yellow-green eyes morphed into a dark olive color.

“Go, Ember.” Mark’s words halted the argument in my throat. “Your safety is the only thing concerning me. I need to know you are safe, and if leaving here ensures your life, you need to go.”

“Mark
...”

“No arguments, young lady.” He tried to stay stern, but his voice quivered.

Tears stung my eyes and burned in my chest. I ran to him and wrapped my arms tightly around him. “I love you so much. I may not be able to bring you home, but I will make you safe. I promise.”

“Come on. We have to go,” Lars demanded.

I pulled away from Mark.

“I love you, too, Sunny D. You are my daughter, blood or not.” He kissed my cheek.

A guttural cry arose from me as I nodded and turned.

Lily stepped up to us. “Mark, I will be back. I need to get Ember safe, and then I will find you.” Her voice sounded unsure.

Mark’s expression hardened when his focus landed on her. He nodded and turned away.

I quickly turned to Ryan. “I love you, Ry.” Lars grabbed me by the t-shirt and yanked me forward cutting my hug short. “Please keep them safe, Castien. Do
whatever
you need to do; just make sure they are all right.”

Castien nodded. “I will.”

Unshed tears gathered behind my eyes. My legs pumped fast as we ran west toward an Otherworld door.

We hopped through dozens of Otherworld doors, going in and out of places like Brazil, Australia, and New Mexico. Finally, one brought us close to Lars’ property. There were millions of doors all over the world, so it would be hard for them to detect which one we had gone through. I still felt the urge to get safely within the walls of his complex. The Queen could not reach us there.

The adrenaline was wearing off, revealing a void inside me where my powers used to be. I felt empty. My body fought the crippling pain inside, which did not stem from the fight, but from so many things: having to leave Mark and Ryan, the truth of my mom not actually being my mom, the guy I loved being involved or contributing to my real mother’s death, and being blood-tied to the Queen. Family. The woman who had killed and hurt so many was my aunt. How could I ever move on from it all?

A small point in my chest burned, growing with every step I took. The woman who was my mother since the day I was born ran next to me, her face solemn.

Eli’s expression mirrored hers as his feet hit the ground on the other side of me. West flopped around on his shoulder. His unconscious grunts told me at least he was still alive. This only enhanced my thoughts of Mark and Ryan. In one sitting, Aneira had taken everyone I loved from me in one way or another. I hoped Castien could keep them safe. My head needed to focus on other matters: getting Kennedy back from Lorcan and breaking the curse the Queen put on me.

The electric current from the spell surrounding Lars’ compound tickled my skin. Breath huffed out of my chest as I came to a crawl. I felt like I was in a kid’s game of tag, and I barely made it to my safety zone. Only heavy breathing filled the air, our group coming to halt. My hands went to my knees as I bent over, taking in air deeply.

“I forgot to ask if you were all right, Ember.” Lars turned to me, looking cool and collected, like he had merely strolled down a runway and not saved me from the Queen of the Otherworld. He only had one small cut on his cheek. On the other hand, I looked like crap with blood, bruises, cuts, raggedy hair, and torn clothes.

I nodded automatically, still grasping for breath. Then his words hit me. Was I all right? I was far from okay. I stood, ire zinging up my spine. My mom—Lily—seemed to sense my mood shift. The dazed shock and hurt I experienced earlier spiraled into immeasurable wrath.

“Ember
...”

“Don’t.” I cut her off.

“Please let me explain.” She took a step to me.

My feet backtracked away from her, and my glare darted between her and Eli. Eli gently placed West on the ground, his attention on me. “What can you possibly tell me to make everything you did ... everything either one of you did ... better?”

“Ember, I only lied to you to protect you—”

“Stop!” Heat burst up my throat, rage vibrating on the surface. “You only lied to me to protect yourself.”

Hurt zipped across her face. Somewhere deep inside it still saddened me to hurt her, but at the moment I wanted nothing more than to wound her.

“You were supposed to be the person I trusted most, and all you have ever done is lie and
cause me pain.” My voice went up several octaves. It all rushed over me.

“Ember, please understand
...” She reached out for me.

Instinct searched for my magic to protect me.

Nothing.

Tears welled in my eyes as I batted her hand away. “Stay away from me!”

Eli had been silently standing to the side, but my thoughts had never ventured far from him. “And
you
.” I pointed, emotion cracking my voice. So many thoughts kept my mouth from opening again.

“Ember, you don’t know the full truth.” He stepped forward.

A crazed laugh came from my throat. “Truth? What do you know about truth?” I glared at him. “Tell me one thing, Eli. Was Aneira lying? Were you there the night Aisling was murdered?”

Muscles twitched in his neck, his mouth gritted. “No, she wasn’t lying. I was there.”

“Is that why she wanted to protect me from you?” I pointed to Lily. “Is this how you know each other? Why you two hate each other so much? She saw you there, didn’t she?” My head pinged back and forth between the two.

Mom looked at the ground and nodded at the same time Eli replied. “Yes.”

Any hope I had evaporated into the air. Waves of anger and hate rolled over me, consuming my every thought, leaving no room for anything else. Something in me snapped. All the lies, hurt, and betrayal I had pushed through before dumped down, suffocating me.

“So you helped
kill
my
real
mother, Eli? Were you there to murder me as well?”

“No—” His words were cut off.

Lily’s fists clenched at her sides, her face rippling with fury. “I was there, Elighan, remember? I know you were going to try and kill Ember, but Brycin stopped you.” The woman and fellow Dae I was named after. Mom had told me how Brycin had helped get us out of the castle to safety. She was later caught, tortured, and then killed for not giving up our whereabouts.

“I won’t lie. I wanted to kill that woman with every fiber of my being. She took my family from me.” A growl slithered through his teeth. “But I wasn’t there for you.”

“Is that supposed to make it better?” My arms swung out. My vocals clenched down, trying to keep my voice steady. “Tell me, Eli, every time you slept with me, did my mother’s face cross your mind? Did you get off on knowing the truth while you were inside of me?” I struggled for air, the words spilling out in a torrent of emotion. “Did you think I would look past your little transgression? That I could forgive you?” A tear broke free, creating a ripple of them, to streak down my face, blinding me. “You let me fall in love with you.”

His mouth went to open again, but I shook my head violently. My body curled with the weight of my despair. “No! Just fucking shut up!” I screeched. Another wave of anger set my muscles on edge. My body moved for him before I even knew it did. My fists smashed into his face and chest. “I
HATE
you!”

He didn’t move, but his hands reached for my wrists. “Ember
...”

“
No
!” I continued to wail on him. Arms grabbed me from behind, pulling me off Eli.

“Ember, calm down,” Lars said and grasped me tightly around the waist. I clawed, kicked, and spit a flurry of incomprehensible words. My brain shut off; my only need was to kill and attack the things hurting me.

“Let. Go. Of. Me.” I struggled against his hold. Heat pounded through me.

My Dark Dweller blood wanted to hurt the two people in front of me with my bare hands. To inflict pain externally, like the pain I felt internally. I was no more than a wild animal. Aneira
had my powers, but my responses were still there. What I thought of as my “Dark” power—the emotion to shut off and let pure, cold, hatred take over—was by far the scariest part. It enjoyed hurting people. Destroying. It was the part the Queen wanted, and I feared—because I liked it.

“Ember, stop!” Lars held me tighter against his body. He could easily stop me, even more so now. His power could bind or control me in an instant, but he didn’t. He let me flail and thrash against his arms.

Ignoring his words, I reached out again, swinging and grunting.

“
Shhhh,” Lars murmured in my ear, and his grip turned into more of a tight hug. “Calm down.”

The simple difference in his touch broke something in me. My rage deflated, and the fight in me turned back to sheer anguish. A long sob quivered out from the depths of my chest. I slumped back into his arms.

“I think you both should leave.” Lars rolled me to face his chest, my tears splashing onto his shirt.

They hesitated.

“Go.” I craned my neck to look at the pair in the eyes.

Tears fell from my mother’s face, grief raw as she sobbed. Eli was stone.

“Now!” I screeched so gutturally it hurt my throat.

Lily took a few steps back, still not wanting to leave. I could not take much more.

“Do as she asked,” Lars spoke, “or I will expel you from the property myself.” My uncle’s embrace was now the only thing keeping me upright.

With a swift nod Eli pivoted and picked up West, cradling him in his arms. He gave me one last look over his shoulder before he jumped into the brush and disappeared into the thick evening shadows.

Lily choked back a cry and pressed her hand against her mouth. Now not needing to “hide” from me anymore, she shifted to her little red fox form. The top Rimmon gave her fell into a puddle on the ground. The animal turned with its head lowered, trotting off toward the property line. Her orange-brown eyes looked back at me one last time. With a soft whimper she, too, slipped into the forest.

I wanted them to go, but now they actually had, my heart burst like a dam. My legs sagged underneath me. Lars eased me to the ground, never letting go of me. A river of agony tore into me. I wailed in pain and howled with grief.

Far in the distance, a pained roar of an animal split the air shaking the trees and earth beneath me.