Blood Beyond Darkness (9 page)

Tension turned the small noises of the house to top volume. My hearing picked up Marguerite setting a pot on the stove. The shrillness of the metal on metal hurt my eardrums.

“All right.” Lars turned around and strode to the French doors and looked out into the night. There would be no apologies coming my way. Demons did not work like that. “Nothing has changed.”

I blinked, his words sinking heavy in my heart. “What? What do you mean?”

He shifted slightly toward me, but kept his eyes looking ahead. “You can still kill the Queen.”

Instant rage pushed me off the wall. “But it will mean Eli dies!”

Lars finally turned and faced me. “Yes, it does.”

“W-What?” Even after all he’d done, the mere idea of something bad happening to him, of him no longer existing, launched a terror so deep I gasped for breath.

“You said yourself how you no longer wanted to see him again. You swore you hated him.”

“I didn’t mean I want him to die!”

Lars sighed. He took slow, methodical breaths. I could tell he was fighting to stay in control. Right now I didn’t care.

“How can you even say that? And here I thought you had grown to like him.”

“The facts have nothing to do with whether I like him or not. We are at war, Ember.”

“How soulless are you? You can’t expect me to kill him no matter what he’s done ... I won’t
do it.”

“Now who is being selfish?” Lars moved to his desk. “Is one life worth millions? Freedom and happiness? Your friends and family? All of it will no long
er exist. Is Elighan’s life worth all their loss and suffering to you?”

My mouth fell open. Then it closed. My first response was to say yes. Even if I never wanted to see him again, and he had done horrible things, I couldn’t kill him. But was I being selfish? Was Eli’s life worth the destruction of Earth? I had already killed so many. Could I really doom all to a life of slavery and or death? Was I willing to forgo the lives of millions of innocent humans and Fae for his?

“You are also condemning him to an even worse fate than death.”

“What?”

“Let us say you do not touch the sword. Yes, Elighan would live ... for a while. So would Aneira. How long do you think his life would last after that? Your way would be quick and painless. Aneira will torture him beyond recognition. I am not talking only physically, either. What she did to Torin would be child’s play compared to what she would do to Eli. She feels the connection between you. She will be cruel in dealing with him especially to hurt you. Even if she has already killed you, she will torment him out of spite.” Lars’ eyes flashed black again, hinting the Demon in him was close to the surface. “Is such a fate what you want for him?”

My lids blinked feverishly, and I stared at my feet, my voice soft. “No.” The weight of the world was on my shoulders, crushing my bones into the earth. Both my choices were unbearable. How could one small decision of mine make or break the entire world? Aneira was conniving, and she had been quick to act that day. She saw my love for Eli was enough for her to think she had me, but could she possibly think I would choose him over an entire population? Yes, she did. She had no respect or love for humans and probably could never fathom I would choose their side. As much as I hated him right now, I also cared too much to let him be tortured. I was fated to kill the man I loved, and I knew what my choice would be when the moment came.

“You will not tell him of the curse. I want all heads clear going into war.” Lars sat back in his chair, his shoulders tight around his neck.

“You don’t want me to tell him he’s going to die?” The shrill voice didn’t sound like my own.

“No.” Lars leaned back. “It will alter his outlook on the battle ahead. He will be impulsive and foolish. His dedication, knowing he will die, would be skewed.”

I wasn’t particularly crazy about the idea of telling him. How do you tell someone he is doomed to die, anyway? But keeping it from him, from my Alpha, didn’t sit right either.

“I bind your tongue, eyes, and hands against telling anyone.” I felt the weight of his spell come down on me, wrapping around my throat and tongue.

“Why ... why did you do that?” My hand went to my already bruised neck.

“I made the decision easier for you. You no longer have the option. You cannot feel guilty for something you are not able to do. Blame me for Elighan’s ignorance. We both know this choice is for the best. There is nothing you can do to change the realities, and Elighan knowing will not help.”

Blistering rage rippled between my ribs. Lars was forcing my hand and taking away my choice. I hated it, but at the same time, I felt relieved the decision to tell him was no longer in my hands. Lars was right. It was probably better Eli didn’t know. I looked down as a single tear dropped from my eye.

“I am sorry, Ember, but my decision is for the greater good.”

My eyelids narrowed as I brought my head up. “I don’t give a fuck about what’s best right now. Don’t worry. I will do what I have to do, but don’t give me platitudes about the greater good!” I seethed. With a turn I propelled to the door. I grabbed the knob, yanked the door open, and slammed it behind me.

I didn’t know what pissed me off more: the fact I felt like I had no choice in the matter, or I still wanted to choose the man who should disgust me.

The world was in my hands? Yeah, good luck,
Earth ...

I stared out the windows into the darkening sky as I sat on my bed. Syrupy clouds dripped with rain, hiding all remnants of the moon and stars beyond. The pulse of my heart thumped quicker in my chest as the night crushed the walls in on me. I had been here too long doing nothing as my life passed by. My friend was lost somewhere out there. I understood searching for Kennedy at this moment was stupid. Lorcan had taken her far away from here by now. But I knew I could get to Ryan, Mark, and Lily. The need to finally hear my mother’s story dominated my thoughts.

“I need you to take me to the Otherworld.” My knee bobbed up and down on my bed. “I want to see my family.”

“She speaks.” Cal flew from the chandelier onto my shoulder.

Simmons followed him, landing roughly on my bed.

“Good girl. Now sit.” Cal pointed towards the bed.

I looked down. My rear was already nestled on my bed.

“Goooood girl.” Cal patted my cheek. “So obedient.”

I flicked him off my shoulder, and he tumbled onto my comforter. “Bad, bad doggie.”

“Cal, do not insult my lady.” Simmons hopped up on my leg, crossed his arms and tapped his foot on my thigh.

“I’m serious. I need to go now. I need to talk to my mom, to see Mark and Ryan.”

Cal padded over and climbed on my other leg. “Are you nuts, girlie? Okay, that is well proven, but are you crazy?”

I frowned.

“Lars will never let you leave here,” Cal exclaimed.

Simmons nodded. “My lady, he is right.”

“Lars doesn’t have to know.”

“Right, because his ignorance has always worked out so well in the past.” Cal rolled his eyes.

“What I mean is he doesn’t have to know till after I leave.” The need to go, to move, took all rational thought and stuffed it in a back drawer of my mind. “Better to go now and ask for forgiveness after.” I couldn’t stay in the room one minute longer. Without warning, I bolted up, taking Cal and Simmons with me.

“Warn a pixie when you are going to erupt all over the place!” Cal yelled as he flew in the air. Simmons settled back on the bed.

My feet moved frantically in front of my patio doors. “Cal, I am going. You can help me or not.”

“Without my help, how will you know how to get there, huh?” He flew up to look me in the eyes. His hands on his hips.

A grin grew on my lips as I turned to the other pixie. “Simmons?”

Simmons looked around, unsettled by my smile. “What?”

Cal’s mouth hung slightly open. “Are you kidding me? You’re not being fair, girlie.”

“What?” My eyes widened. “I am only asking. He doesn’t have to say yes.”

“Oh, come on. We both knew he’ll do anything you ask.”

Simmons’ head snapped between us. “What? What do you want to ask me, my lady?”

“She wants you to take her to the Otherworld.” Cal flew down to the bed.

“What? You want me to escort you against the Unseelie King’s orders to the Otherworld?” Simmons’ eyes grew to the size of dimes.

“Yes,” I confirmed.

He gulped and glanced down. I knelt, becoming level with them. “Simmons, I have been trapped in my own misery for too long. I’ve been a terrible friend and daughter. I need to fix the mess I made.” I paused, knowing the power my next words would have on him. “As future Queen, I ask for your service, soldier. I need your help.”

Simmons lifted his head, pride filling his chest and face.

“What a load of fairy farts.” Cal let his head dramatically drop back. “Could you tug at his little pixie heart—
”

“I will do it,” Simmons cut him off.

“Oh, what a shocker.” Cal threw up his arms.

I leaned in and gave Simmons a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you.”

“What makes you think I am going to go along with you?” Cal stomped toward the edge of the bed, his amber eyes sparked with annoyance.

“I need you to stay here to tell Lars after I’m gone. You can even say you tried to stop me.”

“Sprite spit! You really want to shorten my pixie life, don’t you?”

“
Ahh, it keeps you young.”

“Yeah, because if I am dead, I won’t age,” Cal grumbled. “I’m not stupid enough to go against the Unseelie King.”

I wiggled my eyebrows. “Yes, you will.”

He eyed me, quick to catch my meaning. “I cannot be bought, girlie.”

With that I started to chuckle.

“All right!” He shrugged and sighed. “You know my weakness. I cannot fight you either, you evil sorceress.” He slung his arm across his eyes dramatically.

“Thought so.” I grinned.

A few hours later I found myself deep in the Otherworld. The forest on the Dark side reminded me of my dreams before I knew my true nature or powers. Shadows clung to each crooked tree, wrapping so tightly the lines blurred where one tree ended and the other began. Limbs kinked and twisted, curling into the night sky, only letting the moonlight beam down in rays through the branches. It looked like the dark enchanted forest you always imagined in your head as a child, full of goblins and monsters. I wasn’t afraid. As much as I had loved the forest of the light, I found I loved the forest of the Dark even more. The magic filled my lungs with dense air and sparked energy into my body.

“This way, my lady.” Simmons’ wings vibrated the air, giving off tiny sparks. It made me wonder if this action was where the idea of pixie dust came from. Magic charged their surroundings, and the friction of his beating wings caused the aura to glimmer behind him. I had never noticed it before. If it was because the magic was thicker here or because it was so dark I could finally see it, I didn’t know. It was cool nonetheless.

The deeper Simmons took me into the Dark Fae forest, the more I noticed the creatures. A few times I heard mumbling and movement of undergrowth as something dodged away from me. An animal the size of a bunny with red eyes and horns darted into the brush.

“What was that?”

“Probably a horned-hare, tree hobbit, or a ground troll.” Simmons waved his hand, dismissing all of them.

“Oh, yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t it be?” I said dryly. The Otherworld was still such a mystery to me, and sometimes I would stop and think:
Holy crap ... this is my life.

“Watch your step, my lady. There’s a dwarf’s burrow here.” I tramped around the spot where Simmons hovered. Distorted branches broke through the growth stretching for the ground. They clawed at my back and hair as I bent. There was emptiness now in my soul where I once felt the life of the earth. The trees seemed curious when I passed, as if they felt something different about me, but they quickly lost interest when they felt nothing more inside.

A large leathery winged creature with pointy teeth skimmed my head. “Crap on ash bark! What the hell swooped past us?”

Simmons sighed and turned to see what I was screeching about. The thing buzzed my head again, its soft, bushy tail brushing across my forehead. I hit the ground in defense.

“Oh, yeah, those things are usually nasty.” Simmons pulled out his plastic weapon. “But this one is only a baby. Doesn’t even have its horns yet.”

“What is it? Some kind of bat?”

“No. It’s a wolpertinger, a kind of squirrel with wings, antlers, tail, and fangs.” He slipped his sword back in his belt loop. “His fangs are too little to do any damage to you, my lady, and he has no horns yet. You are safe.”

“A
wolpertinger? It doesn’t have parents or cousins or anything close by?” I slowly stood.

“Yeah, most likely.” Simmons swung back around. Where Cal would have said it sarcastically, Simmons was merely matter-of-fact. “We should probably get out of its territory.”

I quickly followed Simmons. We traveled for a bit as I tried to keep up with him. When we broke through the growth, I paused. My eyes widened at the beauty ahead of me. White light glowed through the mist like Christmas lights. These tiny lit bulbs flickered around me, circling like fireflies. A tickling on my arm caused me to look down. One landed on me.

“What are those?” My eyes examined the dime size creature. It didn’t look like a normal firefly; it was more like an oversized ladybug with electric wings glowing every time it started to fly.

“Lamprog.” Simmons frowned, shooing it off my arm. “Get away.”

“Hey! It wasn’t hurting anyone.” I scowled at Simmons. “They’re beautiful.”

“Not as much as you think.” Simmons snorted. The one he shooed away came back around. The closer it got, the larger its fangs appeared, protruding from its mouth.

Sharp pain zapped up my arm as its teeth sunk into my wrist. “
Ow!” I screamed swatting at the bug. “What the hell?”

“I told you, my lady. They are not nice. Most things in this forest aren’t necessarily pleasant no matter how cute they look.”

“Damn.” I shook my arm. Tingles infiltrated my arm, as the venom worked itself up. “Are they dangerous?”

“Not individually, but once a year on the full moon before Samhain, thousands of
lamprog gather to mate. They get violent and aggressive and can be especially dangerous then. On any other day, they are merely a nuisance. Your arm might be numb for a while, but the venom should not hurt you.”

“The ‘should’ in that sentence doesn’t cause me to feel better.”

“Come on, my lady.” Simmons flew forward. “Don’t let them land on you, and you will be fine.”

I followed Simmons for what felt like a half hour, but time here felt peculiar. It could have been minutes or days.

“Through here. We are almost there, my lady.” He pointed at a cave. It was pitch black, and moss clung to the sides, dripping over the passage like dreadlocks.

“You want me to go in there?”

“There is no other way.” Simmons landed roughly on my shoulder. Without missing a beat, I wrapped my hand around him, steadying him. “You did bring a torch?”

“Yeah.” My fingers dove into my pocket, grappling with the small flashlight I stuffed there.

“As you might recall, my lady, pixies do not care for caves very much.”

I brought my hair over my shoulder, hiding Simmons underneath it. “Better?”

“Yes, my lady.” His wings fluttered against my neck as he tucked in tighter. “But I hate caves. They’re full of bats and spiders, all things which tend to consider pixies food.”

I shared Simmons’ fears of creepy crawly things.

“
Big girl pants. Big girl pants
.” I repeated and stepped into the opaque partition dividing me from my family.