Blue Persuasion (26 page)

The one person in the world who made me feel special was gone forever. I didn’t get the chance to help her through the end. She didn’t even have the decency to let me know she was dying. She definitely didn’t leave me feeling special to her.

I abruptly stood. “Someone get me another drink and let’s go for a swim.” I glanced up and read concern on Tate’s features. I wanted to smack the look off his face.

He raised his hands up and stepped back. Apparently, he could read the intention on my face. “I’ll go get towels,” he said.

I walked inside after him, tripping over the lip of the sliding door, quickly righting myself.

“Blue,” Tate said, reaching out to me.

“Don’t,” I slurred, shuffling to the kitchen.

Red followed behind me and said, “I think we should go. We can swim another time.”

My face grew hot, and I spun to face him. “You, too?” I pushed against his big broad chest.

He stood still, letting me poke at him.

“She didn’t tell me she was dying,” I cried. “Who does that? I never rank more than half. Not to you.” I shoved him again. “Not Bond.” My fists banged his chest. “Not Tate. Definitely not my parents and now, not even Helena.”

“Blue, we don’t feel that way about you. Helena—” Red stopped and glanced over my shoulder.

“Baby,” Tate said, placing his hands on my shoulders from behind me.

I turned around with my fists at my sides. “No!” I shouted. “You don’t want me. No one does. Just leave me the fuck alone.”

Tate lifted me off the ground and carried me to his bedroom as I squirmed to get out of his grip.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” I shouted when he put me down.

“Baby, please listen to me.”

“Stop calling me baby!” Tears joined my anger, and I brushed them away with the back of my hands.

He held his palms out in front of him. “I’m so sorry you’re hurting. Please let me help you.”

“No one can help me. Nobody wants me. Just leave me alone.” I collapsed on his bed and let out a gut-wrenching sob. I have no idea how long I cried, but Tate gave me the space to do so.

“Blue?” I heard through the door.

“Bond?”

“Yeah, it’s me. Can I come in?”

I opened the door and let him take me in his arms, my tears renewed. “What are you ... doing here?”

“Tate called me. He said to get here if I could. I told work I had a family emergency and got here as soon as possible.”

I shuddered out a breath. “Did the rest of them leave?”

“Yes,” he said, brushing my hair away from my face.

“I was mean.”

“It’s okay, Blue. You’re hurting. Red said to call him anytime you need a punching bag.”

I groaned.

“We all want to help.”

My stomach grumbled, and I abruptly stepped back from him. “I think I’m going to be sick.” I ran across the living room to the bathroom. I couldn’t miss the slump of Tate’s shoulders as I passed him on the couch. In the bathroom, up came the drinks and the little bit of food I had eaten. Thankfully, I made it to the toilet in time. I rinsed my mouth and brushed my teeth twice.

When I walked out, Tate still sat on the couch. I went to him and took his hand in mine. “I’m so sorry.”

He lifted me onto his lap and sighed into my hair. “No, I’m sorry. I wish I could do this day over for you.”

“I can’t believe you called Bond.”

“You needed him.”

I tilted my head up and lightly kissed him.

He tightened his grip around me, and I sank against him. We sat like that, clinging to one another.

Bond came in. “Should I go?”

“No,” Tate said. “Are you hungry? Blue needs to eat something. Breakfast?”

“Yeah, that would be great,” I replied.

“I can always eat,” Bond said.

To say I was mortified by my behavior would be a gross understatement. I took the worst of it out on Red, and according to Bond, he was up for more. I don’t know what I did in life to deserve my friends but thankfully, they hadn’t given up on me.

We sat outside, chowing down on eggs, leftover chicken wings, and toast.

“Daniel called me,” Tate said, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

“What did he say?” I asked, placing my fork down on my plate.

“Helena didn’t want any type of religious ceremony, so they’re holding the ashes until after the reading of her will.”

“There’s a will?” I asked. “She never seemed much into possession, so that seems odd. However, having control after death seems just like her.”

“Yeah, and you’re in it. The reading of the will is on Tuesday at nine in the morning. Daniel said he would text you the address.”

“I’m having a hard time wrapping my mind around it,” I said, rubbing the back of my neck.

“I bet,” Bond said, moving his chair away from the table. “Thanks Tate. That hit the spot.”

“Thanks for coming by,” Tate said.

“Anytime for Blue. I’m going to head out now.”

“I’ll walk you out,” I said, standing up and taking his hand.

By the door, Bond hugged me to him. “Call or text me tomorrow. I need to know you’re okay. Red said you could stay with us if you don’t feel like being alone and don’t want to stay here.”

“I feel horrible for hitting him.”

“Don’t. He can take it and you know him, he likes feeling useful.”

I squeezed Bond tightly and kissed his cheek. “I’ll never forget you coming to me. Thank you.”

“Like I said, anytime for you, Blue. Be nice to him,” he said, tossing his head in Tate’s direction.

“Yeah, yeah.” I waved goodbye and closed the door. I pushed off the door and walked back through the house to the deck out back.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Upside Down

by Goldford

T
ate came in from the deck, carrying our plates. “A storm is blowing in.”

I followed him to the kitchen. “Seems fitting.”

“Stop beating yourself up, Blue.” He opened up the dishwasher and loaded our plates.

“Do you work tomorrow?” I asked, slumped over the counter.

“I have two classes tomorrow. Not until the afternoon.”

“Do you want me to stay?”

He nodded. “I understand if you want to be alone.”

“I don’t want to be alone.” I sounded depressed, even to myself. “I shouldn’t drink when I’m so upset. I know better.” I filled up a glass of water and drained it.

“We all do, but sometimes we make bad decisions, even knowing they aren’t good ones.”

“Yeah,” I said, scanning him up and down.

“I didn’t mean you dating me.”

“Uh huh.”

“Come here.” He flipped me over his shoulder and spanked my ass, then carried me to the bedroom and deposited me on the bed. “Are you ready for sleep?”

I shook my head.

“Do you want to watch a movie?”

I shook my head again and crooked my pointer finger, calling him over.

“Are you sure?” he asked, kicking off his shoes.

“Ah huh.”

“Is your stomach okay?” He unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it to the side.

“Tate?”

“Yeah?” He kicked off his jeans.

“Shut up and come. Now.”

“Yes, ma’am!” He dove onto the bed next to me. His hands were everywhere at once, stripping off my clothes, running them over my naked body.

“Ohhh, that feels so good.”

His mouth found mine, taking me on a journey of sensation, his heart on the tip of his tongue, coaxing mine there too. The kisses traveled from hard and fast to soft and slow, the passion of emotion always present. As he pressed me to him, I melted against his body, his hands molding the flesh of my back. He then buried them in my hair.

My heart opened to him again, freeing the tears that hovered close.

He held my face away from him, scanning my features.

If I were a betting woman, I would say I saw love reflected in his eyes, the tilt of his head, and the firm set of his mouth.

Okay, Helena, I’m going to go for it.

Tate, I love you, too.

He shifted me onto my back at the edge of the bed, with my legs up in the air, his eye contact absolute. Kneeling, he held my legs against his chest as I felt the head of his cock tease my entrance. “You’re so wet,” he moaned.

“It’s that wicked mouth of yours.”

“You like my kisses?” He trailed his pre-cum along my labia and then pressed the tip against my clit.

“Ah huh,” I grunted as he dipped the head of his shaft into my entrance. I hitched my hips forward.

“Not yet,” he admonished, backing out. “Do you know why I like this position?”

“The better to torture me?”

He laughed heartily. “No, but that’s definitely a perk. For one, I can watch your face easily. I love when your eyes cloud with your arousal and desperation.” He dipped back in and circled his hips. “Plus, I can easily reach you.” With his big, warm hands, he grazed across my mound, followed the curve of my waist, and cupped both breasts. Squeezing my nipples, he continued to roll his hips, pushing more of his length into me.

“Yesss. More!”

He withdrew and ran his hands up my neck, cupping my face. Leaning forward between my legs, he bit his way up my throat, suckling it, marking me. “And I can commandeer your lips, too,” he murmured and then devoured my mouth with fervor.

Once we broke apart, he sat up and held my legs against him, running his hands over my ankles, down my shins, between my thighs, seeking my swollen clit. “But most importantly—” He thrust into me deeply, causing me to cry out. “—I can make you cum with me firmly inside you.” His fingers brushed back and forth across my clit, the heat of his attention causing me to writhe against him.

My nipples tightened even more as the rush of desire raced over and through my body. Tate and I were perfect just like this, his attention unequivocal. I lost myself in his eyes, expressing all my feelings to him in my gaze. “Ohhh, Tate, just like that.”

“You’re so close. I feel your sexy pussy clutching and pulling on my shaft.”

“Holy fuck, holy fuck, holy yesss,” tumbled out as the fierce orgasm rippled inward and then exploded like a supernova lighting up the sky.

“Damn that was hot,” he mumbled, slowly resuming his incursion.

I spread my legs out around him and pulled him forward on top of me.

“Wait, Blue,” he said, holding himself up beside me. “I don’t think this—”

“Please don’t think. I want you to.” I drew his mouth to mine and felt him lower his body weight onto me. I panicked, trying to breathe through it.

He stroked slowly in and out of me.

I tried to enjoy it, but I couldn’t. “Fuck!” I struggled to get out from under him.

“It’s okay, shhh,” he whispered, lifting his body weight onto his arms.

“I’m sorry, I wanted to.” Tears dripped off the side of my face.

“Don’t be,” he rolled off me and held me in his arms. “Thank you for trying. No one has ever given themselves to me like you just did, and we both knew it was a risk. I’ll never forget it.”

“Thank you for understanding.”

“Let me do something for you.”

“Shouldn’t I be taking care of him?” I asked, pointing down between us.

“He can wait.”

“What do you have in mind?”

“Let’s get ready for bed and you can ask me anything you want that doesn’t have to do with my marriage or divorce.”

I sat up and smiled. “Anything?”

He chuckled and said, “Yes.”

I hopped up and spun around.

He’s letting me in.
My mind and heart high-fived each other.

“You’re cute,” he said, standing up next to me.

I peered up at him and pulled him along with me to the bathroom. I had an easier time peeing with him in the room. We both washed up and brushed our teeth.

In bed, we climbed under the covers and lay on our sides, facing each other.

“Can I ask you something first?” he asked as he played with my bangs.

“Sure.” I touched his five o’clock shadow and licked my swollen lower lip, knowing how it got that way.

“That tongue of yours is quite distracting.”

“Sorry,” I said, rubbing my lips together. “Ask.”

He draped his arm over my waist. “Why did you let me try to take you that way, after everything that happened today?”

“Are you sure you want to hear the answer? I don’t want to push you away. I need you, Tate.”

“I promise.”

I inhaled a deep breath and took the chance. “You were there with me, open, our energies ... I’m not sure of the right words.”

Love, love, love!

“Do you always forgive so easily?” He tugged me closer.

“It’s a tremendous flaw.”

“You haven’t forgiven your brother or father.”

“That’s because they haven’t asked me to.”

“Oh.” He nodded as if he understood. “Thank you for trusting me. What happened for you?”

“It seemed okay for a second, but then overwhelming fear flooded in and I couldn’t breathe. We’ll try again another day.”

“Are you sure?

When you’re ready to love me.

“Yes,” I said to us both. I rolled away to take in his expression. He seemed calm. “Are you ready for my turn?”

“Fire away.”

“How long were you in the construction business?”

He seemed to be calculating and said, “Cal and I worked construction during the summers for his dad, starting in the tenth grade. His father sold us the company when I graduated from college with my Master’s in English. The opportunity was hard to turn down. I had student loans up the ass and had no prospects for paying them off. He gave us incredible terms, and we were able to pay him back from the proceeds each year. Took us eight or so years to manage it, and I paid off my student loans in that time as well. We caught the building boom out west and did very well.”

“Why didn’t you file for Native American status? Wouldn’t your schooling have been paid for?”

“Because I was young and stupid. I thought I shouldn’t get a free ride.”

I laughed. “That is dumb! I would’ve happily taken it.”

“Thanks,” he said, laughing with me.

“This might be a touchy one, but it fits within the boundaries. Is Cal part of the friends you are no longer in touch with?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, gotcha. When did you sell the business to him?”

“Coming up on four years now.”

I ran my fingers across his forehead, trying to smooth out the creases. “How long have you lived here?”

“About a year and a half. I had an apartment in downtown Ft. Lauderdale for a while. Then I moved here.”

“There’s no personal stuff here of yours that I can tell. Is it boxed up somewhere?”

“You sure are the curious one.”

I touched his arm. “You said anything other than...”

“Yes, I did. I have a storage unit.”

“I see. Do you miss the construction business?”

“Part of it. I liked getting my hands dirty and working with the guys. I went out into the field mostly, and Cal ran the business from the office. Plus, I didn’t need to work out like I have to now.”

“Whatever you’re doing is working!”

“Very funny,” he said, tickling me.

“Hey, I’m not finished.” I slapped his hands away.

“Okay, okay.” He held his hands up in surrender. “Give me a kiss first.” His mouth took mine, melting me with his taste, rattling my brain.

Pulling away, I said, “No fair. You’re trying to distract me.”

“Is it working?” He kissed his way up my throat and tugged on my ear with his teeth.

“That feels good,” I said. “But I’m not done. Did you want kids?”

“Yes. Move along.”

Too close, I gathered. “Do you go visit your parents at all?”

He seemed relieved by the new topic of conversation. “Every couple of years. My mother and I text and Skype occasionally.”

“Not your dad?”

“He’s more of an in-person kind of man.”

“Gotcha. How did they feel about you selling the business?” I was curious what they thought of the divorce, too, but I didn’t bother to ask.

“My mother was thrilled, and my father thought I was being stupid, short-sighted.”

“Do you believe in the Native ... I mean American Indian spiritualism? Medicine men and talking to the ancestors and stuff like that?”

“Yes.”

“Just yes?”

“When you live on the reservation, you see it all the time. It’s normal. I lost touch with a lot of the mysticism when we moved to Florida.”

“What would surprise me most about the reservation?”

“Good and evil are both represented. There are witches in our culture.”

“Get the fuck out of town. Really?”

“Yep,” he said, trailing his fingers along my arm.

Trying to ignore his touch, I said, “Wow, I had no idea. What’s it like when you go back?”

“My mother has a slew of women trying to seduce me. She wants me to stay.”

I frowned. “When are you going back?”

“No plans at the moment.”

“Good.”

“Damn, you’re cute. Come here.” He rolled me on top of him and kissed all the other questions off my tongue.