Casting Down Imaginations (5 page)

After we
danced for what seemed like two straight hours, we noticed that the crowd was
beginning to die down and people were starting to leave. A short guy wearing a
red shirt walked over to us and tapped Reese on the shoulder.

“Say,
man,” he said to Reese. “You ‘bout ready to go? I’m ‘bout ready to dip out.”

“Right
now, man?” Reese asked him. Annoyance showed through his tone. “Can’t you see
I’m in the middle of something?”

I backed
what I had harder against Reese to make sure I didn’t loose his attention. The
pressure that came through from him let me know that I succeeded.

“Yeah, I
see,” the scrub answered, checking me out while I continued to work his friend.
“But it’s about that time. My lady’s back at the crib and she just sent me a
text. I got somethin’ waiting on me that I don’t want to keep waiting, if you
know what I’m saying.”

Reese
grunted in frustration. He didn’t want to leave. “Alright, Adam,” he waved him
off. “Just head out to the car. I’ll meet you there in a few minutes.”

I kept
on dancing while Adam walked away. Maybe if I tried hard enough I could get him
to stay. He stopped dancing though, so I knew my night with this king was over.

“You
leaving?” I asked.

He
leaned over and gave me a tight hug, pressing my body against his. He smelled
so good.

“Yeah,”
he answered. “I got to take my boy home.”

“Is he
married or something?”

“No,”
Reese sighed. “But his woman got him pretending like he is. He’s sprung. I
gotta take him home.”

I was
irritated. “He can’t catch a cab?”

He
frowned at my impatience, but then gave me a smile. “Look at you. It’s okay.
We’ll dance one more song before I head out.”

I turned
around and popped everything I had, then dropped it, rolled it, gyrated it,
twisted it, turned it, wiggled it, and everything else that I could. I made it
so that there was no way in the world he would ever forget me. After we danced
Reese walked me to my car. We hugged and exchanged phone numbers before he
watched me drive off. I silently prayed he would call first because I hated
being the one who did.

five

K
aren

I sat up
in bed, tired, but it was time to get up. I had a lot of studying to do, and I
didn’t want to waste one of the two days that I had off lying in bed.

Thank
you Jesus for allowing me to wake up one more day. Help me not to take the
grace and mercy that you have renewed for me today for granted.

After I
took a shower I walked into the kitchen and made myself a nice cup of hot
chocolate to start the day. I had three different subjects to study for, and
the day wasn’t going to go by slowly just for me. Just as I was about to settle
down my cell phone rang. Eager, I jumped up and snatched it from the charger.
It had to be either my dad or Kevin, because I knew for sure my mama wasn’t
calling.

“Hello,”
I answered.

“Karen,
I miss you!” Kevin bellowed into the phone.

I pulled
it away from my face to save my ear drum. “Hey babe,” I said once I recovered.
It was good to hear from him. Since I’d been gone he’d called me almost every
day to tell me some exciting five-year-old news. I didn’t mind though. I missed
the little fellow.

“Are you
awake yet?” he asked me.

“Yep. I
just got up.”

“See,
Daddy, I told you,” I heard him say. “She was up.”

“What’s
going on with you?” I asked him.

“Nothing.
Jimmy got a new bike and I’m going over there to ride it.”

“Really?
That’s cool,” I told him. I didn’t remember who Jimmy was. Kevin had so many
friends, they were hard to keep up with.

“Yep,”
he continued. “He said that I could borrow it if I want to, but Daddy said I
had to make sure he asked his mom first before I take it.”

“You
should do that,” I said. “Can I talk to Daddy?”

“Okay.
Bye, Karen,” he said, and passed Daddy the phone.

“Hey,
Baby Girl,” Daddy said once he was on the line.

“Hi,
Daddy, how are you doing?” I asked him.

“I’m
good. How about you?”

“Great,”
I told him. “Just about to get some studying done.”

“Uh huh.
And what about that dorm room? They let you know anything yet?”

“No, not
yet. They said that it’s gonna be a few weeks before they are able to do
anything.”

He
grunted. “All that money I spent on a dorm room for you…. They should be
careful when they are doing stuff.”

I
sighed. “Yeah, but I’m having fun in here,” I said. “I like it. It’s way better
than the dorm, Daddy. I really don’t mind.”

He
complied. “Okay. But you let me know the minute they try to charge you for
staying there. I’ll be on the phone in a minute.”

I
grinned. “Yes, Sir. How’s Mama doing?”

He
hesitated. They must have been fighting again. “She’s okay.”

I took
that as a sign not to say anything else about her. “Okay, Daddy. I got to get a
lot of work done okay, so I’ll probably call you guys in a few days or so.”

“Okay.
That’s only if Kevin doesn’t call you first.”

I
laughed. “Yeah. Tell my little brother I love him, and Christmas ain’t that far
away, okay? I love you.”

“Love
you, too,” he said, and the two of us hung up.

My cell
phone went off again. The number on the caller ID didn’t look familiar, but I
answered it anyway.

“Hello?”

A deep
voice responded. “May I speak to Karen?”

I was
caught off guard. Who was this calling me? Hardly anyone had my number, and
certainly not any guys. I wanted to get ghetto and ask who it was, but decided
to remain cool. It may have been someone from the school calling about my room.
I doubted it though, since it was Saturday, but didn’t want to take any
chances.

“This is
she,” I said.

He gave
a slight chuckle, one that I’d heard before but wasn’t quite sure where. “Hey
baby,” he said.

Baby?
Forget trying to be dignified.

“Who is
this?”

He
laughed. “You don’t remember me, girl?”

His
voice… It was so familiar… But I still wasn’t sure. “Who is this?” I repeated.

He
laughed again. That same deep laugh…

“You
forgot me already, girl?”

I was
beginning to lose my patience. “Look, I don’t know who this is, but I really
don’t have time to play these childish games. So, I’m about to hang up—”

“Still
same ol’ smart mouthed Karen,” the voice said.

“I’m
hanging up.”

“Karen,
it’s me, Terrance.”

I froze.
A chill went up my spine and commanded all of my muscles to become absolutely
still. Time stood still. If it were possible to feel all of the organs in my
body operate I would have known that they stopped functioning at that moment.

“Terrance?”
I managed to get out. “Terrance? What are you… How did you…?”

He
chuckled. It was sexy and I hated it.

“Is that
all you got to say to me, after all we been through, girl?”

I hung
up the phone.

“Oh
shoot!” I panicked. I didn’t mean to do that, but it was all I could think of
at the moment.

The
phone rang again. It was the same number. I didn’t know what to do.

“Why is
he calling me?” I asked aloud, scared.

The
phone rang and rang. It was about to go to my voicemail. I stood there
fidgeting, not knowing what to do. I couldn’t let it go to my voicemail,
because then he would know that I was avoiding him. And I couldn’t let him know
that he had such a big effect of me still. I had to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Did you
hang up on me?”

“No. My
phone… The signal must have dropped,” I lied.

He
didn’t say anything. He knew I was lying.

“How did
you get my number?” I asked him.

“Your
mom gave it to me.”

“My
mom?”

“Yeah, I
saw her yesterday and she gave me your phone number. She said I should call
you, see how you were doing.”

“You saw
my mom. Are you back home?”

“Yeah. I
came back to see what was up with everybody. And to see about you.”

My body
reacted the same way that it had earlier. I leaned against the kitchen counter
to keep from falling on the floor.

“Why?” I
asked him.

“’Cause,”
he answered. “Can I be real with you for a few minutes, Karen?”

I
swallowed before I gave an answer. I didn’t want him to say whatever it was he
was about to because I knew it was going to make a difference.

“Go
ahead. But I’m not promising nothing,” I told him, trying my best to be tough.

“I been
gone for over two years now,” he told me. “And it’s all been good. I’ve seen a
lot of things, and learned a lot of things—”

“Wait a
minute, I thought you had a girl,” I cut him off.

“What?”

He
wasn’t expecting me to say that, I could tell. I had to get him. “Yeah, that
girl you were always on TV with. Whatever happened to her?”

He
hesitated. “We broke up,” he answered.

“Uh
huh,” I said. Anger was starting to take over. “And so you just thought that
you could call me and then I would just get back with you just like that? It’s
been two years, Terrance.”

“I know
how long it’s been Karen,” he told me. “Me and that girl broke up a long time
ago. We didn’t even last two months.”

That bit
of news surprised me, but I wasn’t letting him get off the hook that easily.
“What do you want, Terrance? I got stuff to do.”

“Look,
all I’m trying to tell you is… girl, I can’t stop thinking about you.”

I
smacked my lips.

“No,
seriously, babe.”

“Can you
not call me that, please? Thank you.”

“Sorry,”
he apologized. “But look, seriously. Lately I been thinking about you
non-stop. It’s like I dream about you every night. I know we broke up on bad
terms, but I honestly think that—”

“Bad
terms? Bad terms!” Now I was pissed. “Terrance, you want to call smacking me
down in front of everybody at school because I told you that I was pregnant
with your child bad terms?”

“Look, I
know I was wrong for that, and I’m sorry,” he tried to explain. “But I just—”

“I don’t
have time for this. Forget my number,” I said, and hung up.

six

Anaya

“Nya,”
someone called out.

I looked
up to see Reese standing at the bottom steps of the sociology building I’d
just walked out of. I was so happy to see him. I hurried over and kissed him on
the lips.

“Hey,
baby,” he said, hugging me.

I was
beaming. It felt so good to be in a relationship with someone again. And he was
too fine!

“What
are you doing here?” I asked him. “I thought we were meeting later on today.”

“We
are,” he told me. “But I wanted to come see about my baby.”

I hugged
him again and gave him another kiss.

“You
wanna go grab something to eat?” he asked.

“Yeah.
Where you wanna go?”

“I got a
taste for the burger place off campus.”

I
frowned. “You wanna go there?”

“Yeah
girl, that place has some real good food.”

“Yeah,
but it’s always crowded. I was thinking we could go somewhere more secluded.
Like maybe your place.”

He
considered it for a moment. “Yeah, but I got a taste for a big ol’ jumbo bacon
double cheeseburger.”

That
place must have something that gets you high in their food for him to pass up a
chance of being with me.

“Okay,
baby,” I told him. “We can go. Do you want me to follow you there?”

“Nawh,
girl. You get in the truck with me. I’ll just drop you back off before your
next class.”

We
walked arm in arm to his SUV where he opened the passenger door for me and
helped me inside. Once we got to the restaurant, I sat down at a table while I
waited for Reese to bring our food. While he was in line I noticed a lot of
females talking to him. He seemed to be nice to them, I guess, but I didn’t
like the way those females were acting. Tugging on his clothes and laughing
like he was the funniest man in the world. I knew they were trying to flirt.
They’d better watch themselves. I wasn’t scared to put a chick in her place
when it came to my man.

Well,
Reese wasn’t my man, exactly. There had been no formal declaration that the two
of us were strictly together. But I was the one he was with most of the time,
so that made me his woman, and these girls needed to realize it. I didn’t share
my steak with anyone. And the past couple of times we’d been together we did
everything but go all the way, so he had to be my man.

I sat
there and watched him tell the girl behind the counter his order. Reese was
fine
.
I was turned on just by watching him from across the room. It was only going to
be a matter of time before I gave him the goods. It was kind of fast, but with
Reese there could never be a too fast.

Reese
pulled out his wallet and gave the girl behind the counter money for the food.
As she was giving him his change a female came behind him and gave him a hug.
He turned around to see who she was, then his eyes darted in my direction to
see if I was watching. I didn’t divert my attention. Whoever this tramp was,
she needed to let go of him before I jumped up from this table. They didn’t
know me in Daytown. I would act a fool over what was mine.

After he
got rid of the girl, he got our food and drinks and came back to the table.

“Who was
that?” I asked him. Neither one of us was in the mood to argue, but I had to
let him know I didn’t like what I saw.

“Just
some groupie,” he answered nonchalantly.

I
nodded. I was discovering there were a lot of them around. But my man couldn’t
help it. They came along with the territory. Any girl would do anything to get
the privilege of being with him. He was a local celebrity. He was always
working with different people, getting his name out there. He did shows in
Dallas and Houston all the time, and he was even talking to someone to get
statewide air play on the radio. My baby was about to blow up. And when he did,
I was gonna be right there with him. These other girls didn’t have a chance.

I
decided to change the subject. “So, how’s that song you were working on the
other night? Are you getting anywhere with it?”

He
stuffed a fry in his mouth. “Awh, man,” he said. “Adam and I stayed up so late
working on that track. But we got it done though. Hopefully it’ll be ready so
we can do it at the show in Dallas this weekend. You still coming with me,
right?”

Here we
go again. I’d been telling him I had to study this weekend for the past three
days.

“You
know I have to study.”

“Come
on, girl,” he whined. “I need you there with me.”

“Baby…”

He
reached over and took my hand. “Come on, girl. I need you to be there for me.”

As bad
as I wanted to go, I just couldn’t. I’d been to those concerts before, and I
was sure it would be just like all the others. It was going to start about ten
thirty and end around two, and then everyone would go to the after party and
drink and act a fool until they passed out, which was usually around six a.m.

“It’s
not that I don’t want to go,” I told him. “I just got too much work to catch up
on. You know I told you I skipped the first two weeks of class. I’m lucky I’m
still in school. I can’t afford to mess up, baby.”

He shook
his head, not wanting to give up. “You know I won’t be able to rock the crowd
unless you’re in my corner.”

“Yes you
will,” I assured him.

“No I
won’t.”

“Listen
baby, when you do your next show in Daytown, I will be right there for you. I
just got too much riding on next week and I can’t mess up.”

He
grunted. “Come on, girl…”

“What
about all of the times you rocked the show before you met me?”

“I
wasn’t nothing without you.”

I was
flattered. It felt good to be desired by a man of his caliber.

“Come on, Nya…”

“Alright,
fine,” I surrendered. Maybe if I stayed up late Friday night studying I could
stay backstage and study while Reese did his thing. That way I could make him
happy and take care of my study needs at the same time.

He
stuffed food in his mouth, grinning from ear to ear.

“But I’m
going to be studying backstage. And no after party.”

He
gulped down some of his soda. “Hey, that’s fine with me baby,” he said. “As
long as you there with me, I don’t care.”

I felt
someone’s eyes burning my back. I turned to see who was starring at me. Two
girls sat at a table in the back of the restaurant by the door, and one of them
watched me like she knew me.

“What is
her problem?” I asked aloud.

He
looked up. “Oh. That’s just Tasha.”

“Tasha?
Who the hell is Tasha, and why is she looking over here at me like she wanna do
something?”

He
shrugged. “I don’t know.”

He was
lying.

“Reese,
who is she? And don’t say you don’t know because you just told me her name.”

He
smacked his lips. “She’s just some girl I used to mess around with, that’s
all,” he said, continuing to eat.

I was
becoming upset. “Messed around with? You mean you had sex with.”

He
looked like he didn’t want to have the conversation. but I just had to know.

“Did
you?” I asked.

“Yeah,”
he said. “You know, I hit that a couple of times. No big deal.”

My chest
hurt. No big deal? I couldn’t even look at him.

“I know
you ain’t mad,” he said, growing irritated. “That was before I even met you, so
you can’t say nothing.”

He had a
point. But from the way she was looking at me, this couldn’t be something she
took so casual. She was ready to fight.

“Are you
still having sex with her?” I asked.

He put
the drink he had in his hand down on the table. “Why does that matter?”

“It does
matter,” I told him, trying my best not to let my voice rise. The last thing I
wanted to do was let Miss Thing back there know she was getting to me.

“Why?”
he wanted to know. “For the past few weeks me and you been getting down like we
do, and you never had a problem with nothing before.”

“Yeah,
we have been,” I snapped. “But I want to know if I’m the only one.”

“Does it
matter?”

The fact
that he answered with a question gave me my answer. But I had to know anyway.

“Yes.”

“No, you
haven’t been,” he answered. “But we aren’t officially together or anything. Me
and you just been chilling.”

“Reese,
I’m not like that,” I told him. “I don’t just do things with people that I
don’t intend on being with.”

“You
could have fooled me,” he said. “The day after we met you didn’t have a problem
doing things to me. Now you wanna act like a good girl?”

His
words hurt. If I would have known my actions would be thrown in my face the way
they just were, I never would have messed around with him. I never thought he
would have treated me like a common whore. But you lived and you learned. Some
guys just didn’t understand that a woman would do anything for the man that she
loved.

I
retrieved my purse from the back of my chair, ready to walk out on him.

“Where
you going?” he asked.

I didn’t
answer. He grabbed my arm and pinned it down to the table, refusing to let me
get up. I wanted to leave. Ol’ girl back there could have him because I would
rather be alone than to be treated like this.

“Look,
I’m sorry alright,” he told me. “I shouldn’t have said what I said. But that’s
not fair for you to be mad at me for something that had absolutely nothing to
do with you.”

“I’m not
mad about that,” I told him.

“Then
what is it?”

“You
know what it is, Reese. Do not play stupid with me.”

He
continued to hold my arm on the table, not letting me go.

“How
many others?” I demanded.

“Does it
matter?”

I glared
at him.

“Look,
Anaya,” he said, looking me square in the eye. “As much as I like you, you are
not my girlfriend. So you can’t be mad at me, acting like I cheated on you when
technically we never even went together.”

There
was some truth to what he was saying. But I still wanted to know.

“How
many?” I repeated.

“Two.”

“Two
people!” I exclaimed.

His
facial expression didn’t change. He honestly didn’t see anything wrong with
what he just told me.

“Why are
you so upset?” he asked me.

“Because
I thought I meant more to you than that.”

“Are you
saying that you want to?”

“Are you
saying that I do?”

“Are you
saying that I do to you?”

“Are you
saying you want to?”

He
smiled and took my hand in his.

“It’s
been a long while since I had a girlfriend,” he told me. “With me in the music
game, it’s hard to be down for somebody like that. I don’t know if I’m ready.”

I smiled,
knowing that he was going out on a limb by trusting me. “I want to be that
somebody for you, Reese.”

“Alright,”
he said. “Then I guess I can let you be my girlfriend.”

I leaned
across the table and gave him a long and passionate kiss. I was sure that just
about everyone in the restaurant stopped what they were doing and watched. But
I didn’t care. Reese was officially my man and I wanted the whole world to
know.