Changing Everything (12 page)

My movements quickened, and Eli must have noticed the change in my breaths, because his warning came through the truck loud and clear. “If you get yourself off, I can make this go a lot longer than two weeks, Paisley.”

I stopped abruptly. My breathing was ragged, and my body was aching for my climax.

“That’s my job,” he added. I started lowering my leg from the dashboard, and he shot me a look. “Don’t you dare.”

Now I was the one glaring. I’d wanted to be in control. How had he turned this around on me?

“Not going how you planned?”

I didn’t answer.

“Don’t worry, Pay, your message wasn’t missed. Just wait until we get to wherever you have us going.”

Or maybe I
was
still in control. I smiled to myself and let my head fall back against the window as I waited for the rest of the drive to pass by.

I told him when to get off the freeway, and where to go, and he shot me a wide-eyed look when we pulled up to the Crystal Pier Hotel cottages.

“Pretty awesome, right?” I asked, and nodded my head in the direction of the dozens of cottages dotting the pier in front of us.

“How’d you pull this off?”

“I have connections.”

Eli rolled his eyes, but smiled. “I’m sure you do.” Turning off the car, he opened his door and stepped out. After getting our bags out of the backseat, he met me at the front of the truck and wrapped his arm around me. “Where do we check in?”

I took the keys out of my purse and dangled them in front of him. “Already done.”

An amused smile played on his lips. “All right. Since you have this all planned out, lead the way.”

We walked along the pier, passing people standing outside the cottages looking at the ocean, others sitting in chairs and drinking, everyone relaxed and enjoying the setting the beach provided. But thanks to the time of year and my friend who worked here, it wasn’t full, and we had a cottage surrounded by empty cottages for the weekend.

Nothing but Eli, me, and the ocean . . . and no one too close to hear.

Eli was walking far enough away from me that our arms weren’t even brushing together, and when I reached out to grab for his hand, he moved it away. I looked up with a confused expression that quickly fell as heat pooled low in my stomach from the look he was giving me.

His dark blue eyes held mine as we walked; the heat and want in them clear, but his face unreadable otherwise. Just before he looked ahead again, the corner of his mouth curved up in a smirk that had me stumbling.

I was so not in control of this.

Stopping in front of our cottage, I fumbled to get the key in the lock as Eli pressed up behind me, and I shut my eyes as I breathed out deeply, trying to compose myself.

“Need help?” he asked, a hint of enjoyment in his tone.

I didn’t respond. Once I successfully had the door unlocked, I let us in and flipped on the lights before shutting the door behind Eli.

He set the bags down on the floor and turned to look at me, that same look he’d been giving me on the pier was back on his face. My heart skipped a beat before pounding painfully in my chest, and I backed up until I was against a wall—my legs and arms trembling with anticipation.

For countless minutes we just stood there staring at each other, the tension in the room growing with each minute that passed. And while I was quickly losing the composure I’d been trying to build, Eli was still standing there like none of this was affecting him and he knew exactly what kind of effect it was having on me.

“You’re trying to make it happen before Sunday,” he guessed, and I sagged against the wall. He nodded, taking that as a confirmation, and held his arms out to his side. “You’re running the show this weekend, come on, Pay.”

“Wh-what?”

“You put on that show in my truck. You played with me that way to get
your
way. Come on, don’t stop now; come have your way.”

He continued to stand there with his arms outstretched, and after the shock wore off, I slowly pushed off the wall and took small steps toward him. Looking up at his expectant gaze, I shakily reached out and lifted his shirt, and let him pull it the rest of the way off. Unbuckling the thick leather belt and sliding it out of the loops, I reached for the button and zipper on his jeans, and watched as they pooled at his feet.

With a smirk, he kicked off his shoes and stepped out of his jeans before standing in front of me again. “What now?”

I gaped at him for a few seconds. “Undress me.” Even though I’d meant for it to come out demanding and erotic-sounding, it came across like a question.

And even though I was practically a statue throughout the entire thing, Eli gave little touches that left those places of my body feeling like they were on fire.

When I was standing completely naked in front of him, he raised one eyebrow. “Now?”

I glanced across the studio to where the bed was, and grabbing one of his hands, led him over to it. Pressing my fingers to his stomach, I pushed until he sat down, and took deep breaths—trying to summon the same courage I’d had in the truck. But it was gone. I didn’t know what to do; I didn’t know how to start this with him.

Moving to stand between his legs, I threaded my fingers through his hair and brought his mouth to mine. Eli curled his arms around my waist, but I pulled back and looked down at his lap.

“I’m g-going to, I want to sit on y-you,” I stammered, and Eli fought a smile.

Oh my God, what
is
this? This is worse than my first make-out in junior high! And Eli is trying not to laugh. It’s time to run away!

Eli scooted back and lifted me onto his lap; a teasing grin was on his face as he waited for what would come next. But I was frozen. I couldn’t make myself kiss him, I couldn’t enjoy the fact that I wasn’t wearing anything and he was only in his boxer briefs. I was shaking. I’d made this so awkward.

Leaning close to my ear, he nipped at the lobe, and whispered huskily, “Now?”

A shiver ran up my spine, and he laughed darkly. Everything about his tone in that one word changed from the last time he’d said it, and everything in the room shifted. My breaths were no longer coming too fast because I was screwing everything up, they were spiking because the same tension that had filled the room when we’d first walked in was quickly engulfing us.

He lazily trailed one finger down my spine, and his blue eyes held mine. “What happened to the girl who would climb on my lap and tell me what she wanted?”

I didn’t know what to say, my mouth opened but nothing came out for a few seconds. “I felt brave then.”

“And now?”

“Not so much,” I admitted breathily.

Eli flipped us so fast it made my head spin. Pinning me onto the bed, he pressed his lips to my neck and I moaned when he gently bit down on the soft skin there.

“That’s because you’re not getting your way during those times; you like the fight, Paisley.” His lips moved in faint brushes along my throat, down my chest, and just when he came to the swell of my breasts, he moved back up. “Just like you like when I push you to try or do something even when you’re not sure about it. Babe, you’re a siren when I’m in control. You make it practically impossible to say no.”

My lips trembled along with my body, and I arched my chest against him. I was aching to have him touch me.

“You tortured me by making me watch you touch yourself for almost two hours, but you want me to be in control of this, don’t you? Just like when you asked me to spank you, Pay.
You
asked for it, but when it came down to it you asked me to stop, and what happened next?”

“Uh,” I forced out between my heavy breaths.

“I stayed in control, and I did it again, and again; and soon you were moaning and begging for it, and coming harder than you have before.”

I whimpered and writhed beneath him when the tips of his fingers trailed down my stomach, stopping just above where I was craving him.

“Let me control this, let me be the one to know exactly what you need. Because while I know you like trying to take control, Paisley, I know you love that I never give it to you.”

I nodded, and my next moan was quickly cut off when his mouth slammed down onto mine. His tongue moved against my own in perfect rhythm with his fingers inside me. The unsatisfied ache from the car ride flared as I approached my climax, but I wanted more. I wanted all of him.

“Please,” I whimpered when Eli bent to pull one of my nipples into his mouth.

Grabbing the band of his boxer briefs, I pushed down and ignored the warning bite that only made me want this more. Using my feet, I moved the material down his legs, and gripped his erection in my hand.

“Give me you,” I pleaded.

“There’s my girl,” he growled in approval, and released me to slide my body up to the middle of the bed.

Crawling between my legs, he bent to capture my lips again as he slowly ran his hand down my left leg to wrap it around his waist, before doing the same with the right. Reaching his hand between us, he rubbed his fingers against my clit as he pressed his cock against my lips, letting it slowly slide against me, teasing me. If this was how he was going to tease me, I regretted teasing him in the car. He was so close, and I was so close to being his, that I was ready to cry out in frustration because it still wasn’t close enough.

I was about to beg again when he rolled his fingers against me, and a body-numbing heat exploded inside me. My moan turned into a shocked gasp laced with pain when Eli suddenly pushed inside me, and filled me over and over again as my orgasm continued. I’d wanted more of him, but I hadn’t been prepared for this. My fingers dug into his back, and my legs tightened against his waist as I stretched around him.

Leaning on an elbow, he cupped my cheek in one of his hands as his eyes held mine, and his pace quickened. My lips parted and shook when he went even deeper, and I wasn’t sure how much more I could take.

Eli kissed my trembling lips, and didn’t move away to whisper, “I love you.” Minutes later his body stilled for long seconds above mine, then began vibrating. “Mine,” he breathed.

I looked up at his bright smile and leaned up to kiss him again. “Always.”

Chapter Thirteen

October 5, 2013

Eli

I
WOKE TO
the sound of waves breaking against the pillars, light filtering in through the windows, and Paisley lying across my chest the next day. This was my heaven, and I wanted it every morning for the rest of my life.

Glancing at the clock on the far wall, I smiled and stretched when I read the time. Almost one in the afternoon. We’d passed out sometime around five this morning, and I’d been convinced I wouldn’t wake up for a day. I teased Paisley about the things she liked and for being insatiable, but, honestly, she’d brought something out in me that I hadn’t known was there. I couldn’t get enough of her, I was always ready for more, and was ready to push the boundaries to see how far she would let us go . . . only to push them a little further.

It’d never been like this before, but more than that, there’d never been the connection that I have with her.

Kissing the top of her head, I slipped out from underneath her and walked into the bathroom to take a shower. I waited for the room to steam up before I stepped under the spray, and welcomed the hot water that pelted down on my tense and aching body as I cleaned up.

I turned when the glass door opened, and a smile tugged at my lips when a barely awake Paisley stepped into the shower with me. She sagged against my chest, and wrapped her arms loosely around my waist so she could just hang there. Turning us so I blocked the water from hitting her, I stood there holding her with one arm, and ran my other hand through her long hair and down her back.

“Morning, beautiful.”

She tilted her head up so that her chin was resting on my chest, and smiled tenderly at me; her dark eyes had a dreamlike look to them.

“How do you feel?” I asked cautiously, and my body tightened in response when she grimaced.

“I hurt.” Paisley slowly moved her body, as if testing out each place, but never removed her arms from my waist.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured, and pressed my hand against her cheek.

I grew painfully hard against her stomach as images from last night flooded my mind. I’d pushed the boundaries, she’d kept begging, and I’d pushed harder. I knew she’d be sore this morning, but I hadn’t stopped.

Like I’d told her last night. She was my siren. It was almost impossible to tell her no when she asked for something.

“Don’t be sorry,” she said so softly I almost didn’t hear her above the water from the shower. She bit down on her too-full bottom lip, and brought her hand between our bodies to run her fingers slowly over my cock. “What do you want, Eli?” The want in her eyes and the hint in her question were impossible to miss, but I pulled back from her hand and kissed her soundly.

“I want to go get food for us while you finish taking your shower, and come back to find you still naked. I want to take care of you and be so gentle with you today,” I whispered, and traced my hand down the curve of her ass. “I don’t care that I only opened my eyes to you a month ago, I feel like I’ve been waiting to start the rest of my life with you for years. I don’t want to keep going home to an apartment that you’re not at. I want you to move in with me until my lease it up, and then I want to buy a house on the ocean so we can wake up like this every morning.”

Paisley pulled away from my lips; her dark eyes were wide and bright, and matched the smile crossing her beautiful face.

Looking down, I brought my hand up to brush my knuckles against her cheek. “I don’t want another day away from you.
That’s
what I want.”

“I’m pretty sure that sounds perfect,” she said breathlessly.

“Good.” Kissing her softly, I whispered against her lips, “Enjoy your shower, I’ll be back with food soon.”

After drying off and finding my bag still sitting near the door, I dressed and headed out in search for food for us to eat now, and to easily make in the cottage over the next few days so we wouldn’t have to leave again unless we wanted to. An hour later, I walked back into the cottage to find Paisley propped up against the pillows, dark hair in wild waves falling around her, asleep on the bed.

Last night had been
that
intense.

Putting most the food in the small fridge and leaving the rest out, I leaned my hip against the counter and folded my arms across my chest as I watched Paisley sleep. There were so many things I hadn’t told her while we were in the shower that had been begging to be voiced, and those thoughts had only grown louder while I was out getting food. But standing there watching her, I didn’t know how I was supposed to keep them in anymore despite how rushed they seemed.

I slipped off my shoes and walked quietly to the bed as I pulled off my clothes. Climbing onto the bed, I pressed my lips to hers before making a trail down, and felt her stir awake when I passed her breasts.

“Hey,” she mumbled huskily, and lightly dragged her fingers through my hair. “Did you get food?”

“I did.”

Her breaths became louder when my kisses hit her lower stomach, and after a few seconds, she decided, “It can wait.”

Propping myself up on my elbows, I settled my body between her now-bent knees, and traced imaginary circles on her stomach. “You’re not on birth control.” It wasn’t a question, but she still shook her head. “I didn’t wear condoms last night.”

The corners of her mouth tilted up for a second. “I know.”

“And I didn’t buy any when I was out just now.”

Her eyebrows slanted down over her dark eyes, and she asked, “Why not?”

“Jason told me you were ready to get married and settle down. Was that true, or was he saying that because he was hoping it would make me realize what I could lose?”

“That’s true,” she answered, drawing out the words to sound like a question.

“I wasted a lot of time with you, Paisley, I don’t see a reason to wait for anything with you.”

One eyebrow lifted, and a sharp laugh burst from her chest. “Are you saying you want to knock me up, Eli Jenkins?”

“I’m saying I’m trying to start on everything I mapped out for you in the shower, and everything I wasn’t sure how to say.” I glanced down to where I was still tenderly touching her stomach before meeting her gaze again. “I want to have a family with you, and I want to marry you. I want to love you for the rest of my life, Paisley.”

Her wide brown eyes slowly filled with tears, and a beautiful smile covered her face. A line of tears fell down her cheeks when she shook her head subtly. “Eli, it has only been one month since you realized you were in love with me. I have been dreaming of that future with you for years, but for you and for us, we need to wait. We can’t just get married right now.”

“Why?” I asked impatiently, and earned a light laugh from her as she gently ran her fingers through my hair.

“Because I want you to be sure that is something you—”

“I am sure,” I said honestly, cutting her off. “I told you, Pay, I feel like I’ve been waiting for this for years.”

“And
I
have,” she reminded me. “If you asked me—and I mean
seriously
asked me—there is no way I would be able to say no to you, Eli. But I think you’ve felt like you’ve been waiting for this for years because when you realized how you felt, you were immediately faced with not being able to have me. Those first two weeks, you were scared you wouldn’t get a future with me, and now it’s only been two more weeks that we’ve even been together and you haven’t had to worry about us. I want you to give it some time until the newness of us has passed before you decide that getting married to me is something you actually want.”

I studied her face for silent moments, and watched as the small trail of tears continued to fall. I knew exactly how long it had been since she’d shown up at my door to tell me she’d chosen me. But I wasn’t going to change my mind weeks, months, or years from now. When I started to tell her that, I stopped abruptly, and my eyes widened. “Paisley,” I whispered. “Are you still afraid that I’m only with you because I don’t want to lose my best friend?”

She shook her head quickly, and admitted, “I’m still afraid that I’m going to wake up tomorrow, and I’ll be in my bedroom worrying that you’ll have a girl in your bed when I come over for our Sunday morning, and all of this will have been a dream.”

“That’s not going to happen,” I promised her. “I’m going to make sure you wake up every morning for the rest of your life knowing exactly how much I love you.” With a reluctant nod, I said, “If you really want to, we can wait another month to get married.”

Paisley laughed softly and tugged at my hair. “A year.”

“Fuck no.”

“Language,” she chastised. “A year,” she repeated.

“And if I got down on one knee right now and asked you to marry me?”

“I would set the date for a year from now.”

I groaned and dropped my head on her stomach. “When I thought about this conversation, it went a lot differently in my head.”

“Oh yeah?” she asked teasingly.

“I thought you were going to have me drive us to Vegas today,” I admitted against her skin, but still didn’t look up at her.

Paisley was quiet for a couple minutes. She just continued to run her fingers through my hair, and just when I looked up to see her expression, she said, “People just wouldn’t understand. They wouldn’t know our story even if they know us, and they just wouldn’t get it. I’m pretty sure Kristen and Jason wouldn’t even agree with us doing everything so soon.”

“Who cares about anyone else? I don’t give a fuck what other people would think. I care about what
you
think, and what I want with you.”

“But they would all give us their opinions. They would constantly be telling us how stupid we were, and they probably wouldn’t show up to our wedding.”

My face fell. “You don’t even want a big wedding, Pay. And
again
, who cares about anyone else?”

Her eyes widened and her hands stopped moving. “How do you know I don’t want a big wedding?”

“Because you’ve said that at every one of our friends’ weddings.”

“You remember that?”

My brow pinched together. “Of course I do. Just because I wasn’t catching on to what you were waiting for from me, doesn’t mean I wasn’t listening to you.”

She watched me in awe for a few seconds, then said, “I’m still not marrying you until a year is up.”

I exhaled heavily and nodded. “I can wait a year to marry you as long as you’ll still move in with me.”

“As soon as my lease is up in four months.”

“No. That is definitely too long.”

Paisley laughed softly. “We can do a week at my apartment, then a week at yours, and continue doing that until my lease is up.”

“Better,” I agreed, then mumbled, “Does this mean I need to go back out and buy condoms?”

“Maybe you should have just gotten them your first time out,” she suggested, and I sighed in defeat.

“Okay. I’ll be—” I cut off when Paisley grabbed my arm and pulled me back down onto her when I’d started getting up.

“I’m kidding. I brought some with me; they’re in my bag. I just wasn’t really thinking about them last night or this morning until you brought them up.”

I placed a kiss on her nose and got up from the bed to grab her bag. “You can’t blame me if you get pregnant from last night.”

“I doubt I got pregnant last night.” She laughed softly. “But, oh my God, I can see your mom’s reaction now if we got pregnant before we got married.”

“Then I guess it would be Vegas or the courthouse for us,” I grumbled like it would be a hardship to marry her.

Paisley just rolled her eyes. “I may not have ever talked to your mom as your girlfriend, but she’s always known how I felt about you, and I know for a fact that she would kill us if we didn’t have a huge wedding.”

I was no longer surprised by anyone else knowing; I knew I’d been the only one blind to Paisley’s feelings. “Did you ever tell her that wasn’t what you wanted?”

“No . . .”

“Then who cares what she wants.”

Paisley choked out a laugh. “Eli! She’s your mom. You’re supposed to care, just like I do.”

I crawled back onto the bed with her and held her stare. “Tell me
exactly
what you want when I finally force you into marrying me.”

Her eyebrows rose. “Force me, huh? Thanks for the fair warning,” she teased, but then the humor in her eyes and smile changed into something softer. “I just want you. I don’t want anything big, I just want simple. I want to wear a white dress, and I don’t want to have to be around a bunch of people after. I just want it to be you and me, like we are right now. I don’t want a ring—”

“Fuck that,” I balked. “I’m getting you a ring.”

“Language, and I don’t want one! You told me to tell you exactly what I wanted, and I’m telling you.”

“If you don’t let me get you a ring, how are people supposed to know you’re mine, Pay?”

When she spoke again, her voice was nearly inaudible. “I’ve always been yours, Eli. My love for you has never been a show for everyone else. It’s always been just for you; that’s not changing now.”

Well fuck. She just had to go and put it like that.
“No ring,” I conceded with a sigh.

“If you want, I’ll get a tattoo.”

“You hate needles.”

She shrugged and smiled mischievously. “I’ll get a portrait of Lurch on my shoulder or something.”

I dropped my head onto her chest, and my shoulders and back shook from the laugh I was trying to hold back. Once I was sure I could keep a straight face, I looked back up to her. “If you get Lurch, I’m getting a troll with purple hair.”

Her eyes widened and her head shook slowly back and forth. “No,” she mouthed. “But, that’s what I want. I just want simple; I just want us.”

“Then that’s what it will be,” I assured her. “Anything you want, Paisley. Always.”