Chasing Circumstance (16 page)

I sat down against a tree, pulled my phone from my purse and turned on the music player on it.  Digging out my ear buds from the bottom of my purse; I attached them to my phone and put them in my ears.  I hit the shuffle button on the player so it would randomly play the music.  I was utterly shocked by the song that began to play.  “Let it all go and just be free.  The sins of other’s are not of thee.  The lessons we learn make us stronger.  Don’t dwell in your past any longer.”  As tears began rolling down my cheeks, I thought to myself, ‘How apropos.’

I sat there for a couple of hours feeling completely captivated by the scenery and all it had to offer me.  The days were getting shorter now, so I knew I should start heading home.  I put my phone, ear buds and camera back into my purse and closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and soaked it all in for just a couple more minutes.  Geese spoke to each other as they flew over head making their way to warmer climates.  A heavy moss scent hung in the air, and the thickness of the leaves beneath me reminded me of a patchwork quilt.

Standing, I brushed the leaves from my body and headed back down the path I had taken there.  When I reached the hill, I struggled to make my way back up it, but finally reached the top.  I jumped back over the guard rail and turned to take one last look at the mountains before getting in my car and leaving.

The drive home felt lighter than the trip there had.  I felt new and ready to take life on headfirst.  It was as though I had left all of the pain and heartbreak under those trees, and the path I walked brought me back to my loving, compassionate, fun self.

The moment I got back into the city, I stopped in at Tic Tac Thai and picked up some curry to take home for dinner.  Jo and I always got the same thing from there, so I knew exactly what she wanted.  When I left the Thai place, I ran into the liquor store right next to it and picked up a bottle of Gewürztraminer white wine. 

On my way home, I had to stop at a red light, so I quickly called Jo to let her know I was on my way and had picked up dinner along with a special treat.  She sounded happy to hear from me and said she was waiting but not patiently.

Jo met me at the door and before she even said hello, she took the food out of my hands and went to the living room.

“Hi, glad to see the food is more important than I am.”  I laughed as I sat my things down and went into the kitchen to get two wine glasses.

“Oh, glad you’re home.  Have fun?”  Jo had already started eating and had her mouth full of food when she answered me.

“I don’t know if I would call it fun, but it was completely cathartic.”  I sat down and poured us each a glass of wine before opening the take out box that contained my food.

“Cathartic?”  Jo had swallowed her food and looked at me.

“Yes, that’s why I went for the drive.  I had some things to work out, so I headed up to Slide Mountain.”  I stood up, took my camera out of my purse, and handed it to Jo.  “Here, check out these pictures.”  Sitting back down, I started eating my dinner.

“Wow, Amia, these are fantastic!  You have quite the eye for this stuff!”  She flipped through the pictures and handed me my camera.  “We should print some of those out and frame and hang them.”

“Sure, we can do that.  Want to watch a movie?”  I picked up the remote and turned on the television.

“Yes, but I get to pick it out.” She jumped up, thumbed through the movies and stuck one in the DVD player.  “Hit play, would ya?”

We hung out the rest of the night, watching movies, talking, laughing and finding our way back to the amazing friendship we had.  It was exactly what needed to happen.  I hated fighting with Jo, and though this wasn’t the first time it had happened, it was the one that set heaviest on my heart.  I couldn’t imagine my life without her.

Around midnight, Jo announced it was time for her to go to bed because she had to be up for work the next day.  She stood up, kissed me on the forehead and went to bed.  I put everything away and went to my room to write.

“Dear You,

Baptism, defined in the most simplest of terms, is a ceremony by which a person is purified.  Shadows of our yesterdays are cleansed from our souls to make room for brighter tomorrows.  We emerge clean, new and pure.

I believe that forgiveness of those that hurt us plays a large role in this.  Forgiveness is a lot like washing your hands.  We don’t do it once and expect them to stay clean.  Every time our hands get dirty, we wash them again.  The same goes for forgiveness.  When we feel the dark emotions creeping up on us from our past, we should forgive again and wash the slate clean.  We need to baptize ourselves in order to not dwell in the sins of the past, and instead, rejoice in the lessons they created and the path they put us on that brought us to our today.

So, tonight dear readers, I leave you with this question…

How often will you wash your hands?

~ Amia”

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

“Dammit!”  My alarm clock didn’t go off and I only had an hour until Chace was supposed to be here to pick me up.

Jumping out of bed, I ran to the bathroom, started the shower and then went to my closet to pick out my clothes for the day.  I had no idea where we were going so I stuck with a casual look and chose a pair of black leggings topped with a long tan sweater.  Chace wasn’t a fancy kind of guy anyway.

Rushing through my shower, I jumped out, brushed my teeth, put in my contacts and ran back into my bedroom.  That’s when it hit me that I hadn’t even dried off.  I grabbed the towel off the back of my chair and dried myself before throwing on my clothes.  I grabbed a long fuzzy pair of socks out of my dresser drawer and pulled them up over my leggings so they would stick out of the top of my hiking boots.

Sitting at my dressing table, I brushed my hair and parted it down the middle in two sections.  I then French braided each side and tied small tan bows in the bottom of the braids.  I wore my make-up as I usually did except this time I used earth tone colored eye shadow to match my sweater.  Smoothing on a bit of lip gloss, I looked in the mirror and decided it was good enough.  I needed coffee.

I picked up my purse from the floor where I had left it the night before and headed downstairs.  The moment I opened my bedroom door, the robust scent of coffee greeted me.  Jo must have programmed the coffee pot to start brewing a fresh pot for me when I woke up.  I just loved her.

I sat my purse on the couch before walking into the kitchen.  I got a cup out of the cupboard, turned to pour myself a cup of coffee, and saw a note next to the coffee pot.

“To My Dearest Amia,

I could not be more thrilled for you today.  This has been a long time coming and I am sure you will have an absolute blast.  Calm down, you’ll be just fine.  Thinking about you and can’t wait to hear all about it when I get home from work.

Much Love,

Jo”

Sitting the note back on the counter, I smiled and thought, ‘She knows me better than I know myself sometimes.’  I then poured myself a cup of coffee and went into the living room to watch the news while I waited for Chace.

It had just ended and the first soap opera of the day started when Chace knocked on the door.  “Just a minute.”  I went into the kitchen to put my cup in the sink before I answered the door. 

“Hi, you look amazing!”  Chace smiled at me and then handed me a balloon. 

“Thank you, what’s this for?”  Smiling, I accepted the balloon and stepped close and hugged him.  “Want to come in for a minute?”

“Sure, I could use a cup of coffee if you have any made.”  Chace stepped past me and put his arm over my shoulder as he did so.  “Wow, this is a really nice house.  I hope that someday, I will live in a neighborhood like this.”

“Thanks, Jo worked hard to get everything she has and I’m honored that she shares it with me.  Living here gives me the opportunity to be able to save enough money to buy my own house soon.”  I realized I was rattling on and stopped myself.

“That’s wonderful, Amia.  That must feel truly empowering.”  We stopped at the bar that separated the kitchen and living room.  I tied the balloon to the back of one of the barstools and went into the kitchen.  Chace sat down at the bar while I poured us each a cup of coffee.  “I woke up late today so I have yet to have a cup.”

“I woke up late as well.  I was lucky though.  Jo made sure there was coffee waiting for me when I woke up.”  I handed him his cup and sat down next to him.

“Thanks, this smells good.”  He picked up his cup and smelled the coffee.

“Oh my god, that’s so funny.”  I laughed as I did the same thing.

“What’s so funny?”  He took a drink of his coffee and looked at me before sitting it on the bar top.

“I do the same thing.  I can’t drink coffee without smelling it first.”  I went to sit my cup on the bar but the edge of the cup hit the bowl of fruit sitting there and I spilled it all over the counter.  “Shit.”  I jumped up to get a towel to clean it up.

“Well, I guess that’s our cue to go.”  Chace finished his coffee and set his cup in the sink.  “Ready?”

“Sure, just let me grab my purse first.”  I walked into the living room and picked it up from the couch. 

“After you, M’Lady.”  Chace opened the door and stepped aside to let me pass.

“Why thank you, kind sir.  Please, be ever so kind and lock the bottom lock before closing the gate to the castle?”  I offered a small curtsy as I stepped past him. 

“You are too damned cute.”  Chace did as I asked him to and then put his arm around my waist as we walked out to his car.

“Thanks, you’re not too bad yourself.  By the way, where are we going?”  I stood next to the car and waited for him to open the door. 

“You told me to surprise you, so that’s what I’m doing.”  He closed the door once I got in and sat down.

He walked around the front of the car and looked at me through the windshield as he did.  His smile was genuine and happy.  “Want to listen to music?”  He got in, sat down and looked at me before starting the engine.

“Sure, what do you have?”  I fastened my seatbelt and rolled down the window a little.  I started feeling a bit flush and hoped that the fresh air would help.

“My CDs are in the glove box, help yourself.  You’ll find that I listen to mostly alternative rock though.”  He leaned over and opened the glove box.  His arm rested on my thigh for just a moment.

“That’s another thing we have in common then.”  I reached for the CDs and went through them.  “Here, put this one in.”  I handed him a disc from one of my favorite bands.

“I love this band.  I’ve seen them in concert three times.  Every see them live?”  He slid the CD into the player and pushed play.

“Yeah, I caught there concert in Jersey last summer.”  I continued to look through the CDs as he put on his seatbelt and pulled away from the curb.

“The one in Princeton?  At the college?”  He stopped at the stop sign at the end of the block before turning left.

“Yeah, how did you know?”  I looked to the right to make sure there wasn’t any traffic coming.

“I was at the same concert. It was fabulous!”  He made his turn and continued down the street.

“Yes they were!  The way the lead singer interacted with the crowd was outstanding.  I loved how he didn’t leave anyone out and came out into the crowd to sing to the people in the back.”  I prattled on like a schoolgirl. 

“I was about five people back from him when he did that.  I could almost reach out and touch him.”  He matched my enthusiasm with his chatter.

“Me too!  How were we so close but didn’t see each other?”  I reached over and playfully pushed his shoulder.

“Because we weren’t meant to meet until now.”  He took my hand and kissed it before letting it go.

“Be careful Mr. Cavanah, you may make me swoon.”  I put my hand to my forehead and pretended to faint.

“Don’t worry, if you fall, I’ll catch you.”  His smile was so charming that I actually felt myself swoon a bit.

We continued to chat about music and the concerts we had been to until he pulled into a parking garage.  “What are we doing here?”  I looked around to see what we were close to in order to try to get a clue of what we were about to do.

“We’re parking, Silly.  We’re going to walk from here.”  He took the ticket from the automated machine and pulled through to park.

“I can see that, but why here?”  I giggled at his answer.

“Because this is where people park when they’re in this part of the city and need to park.”  He wasn’t giving up any information.  He pulled into a spot and shut off the engine.  Getting out of the car, he pointed at me to instruct me not to move while he came around to the passenger side door and opened it.  “I am nothing if not a gentleman.”  He took my hand as I stepped out and then closed the door behind me.  Walking around to the back of the car, he hit the unlock button and the trunk popped open.  After reaching in and retrieving a backpack, he shut the trunk and hit the button on his remote to lock the car.  “Alrighty then, let’s proceed, shall we?”  He took me by the hand and we walked out of the garage.

“So, where are you taking me?”  I was very familiar with this part of the city but still could not figure out where we were going.

“I told you, you asked me to surprise you and that’s what I’m doing.  You’ll learn to trust me eventually.”  He squeezed my hand tighter and pulled me to the other side of him.

“What are you doing?”  I laughed as I stepped to the inside of the sidewalk.

“A lady is always supposed to walk on the inside, so her gentleman escort can protect her should anything happen.”  He looked down at me and smiled as he adjusted the strap from his backpack on his shoulder.

“I see, and as you said, you are nothing if not a gentleman.”  I looked at the ground and watched my feet as we walked.

We crossed the street and walked into the entrance of Central Park.  Strolling down the path, we stopped in front of the zoo.  “Well, here we are.”

“Oh, how fun!  I love the zoo!”  I clapped my hands together like a little girl, draped my arms over his shoulders and kissed him on the lips.  “Thank you so much!”

“Wow, if that’s the thanks I get for taking you on a picnic to the zoo, I can’t wait to see what happens when I take you out to a real restaurant.”  He put his arms around my waist and kissed me back.

“A picnic?  Did you get some advice from Jo or something?”  I looked up into his eyes as he held me.

“Nope, I did this all on my own.  I thought it would be a nice change from the usual stuff.”  He let go of my waist, took my hand, and after purchasing our tickets, escorted me through the entrance.

Our first stop was to watch the sea lions get fed.  We had barely made it in time for their two o’clock feeding.  We stood there hand in hand, in the middle of a large crowd, watching them enjoy their meal.  The odd thing was I didn’t notice the crowd of people until we turned to continue on our tour.

After walking around the majority of the zoo, we stopped to eat in front of the penguin display.  “Are we getting something to eat here?  I think I saw a hotdog stand back by that way.”  I turned and pointed over my left shoulder.

“Nope, I brought our lunch with me.”  He opened his backpack and took out two silver containers and a thermos.  “Here you go.”  He handed me one of the containers as he pulled out a small blanket and spread it between us on the bench we were sitting on.

“What’s this?  You cooked again?”  I opened the small lunch box to reveal what was inside.  There was some kind of sandwich wrap, a fresh fruit salad, and chocolate chip cookies.  “This looks yummy!  Where did you buy them?”  I picked up the wrap and took a bite.

“I made them.  The chicken wraps are made with homemade fried chicken from my aunt’s recipe.  All I had to do with the fruit is wash it and cut it up, so that part was easy enough.  I even baked the cookies from scratch.”  Chace looked proud of himself.

“You bake too? You’re going to spoil me.”  I sat the wrap down and began to enjoy the fresh fruit.

“You’re worth spoiling.”  He picked up his chicken wrap and started eating it.  My heart leapt into my throat as he spoke those words.  I had said those same words to Stuart every time he teased me about being spoiled but it never stopped him.  I pushed the thoughts from my head and focused on the man in front of me.

“Be careful, I could get used to this.  I don’t do a whole lot of cooking unless you consider heating things up as cooking.  What’s in the thermos?”  I sat my food down and wiped my mouth.

“Oh, it’s hot cocoa.”  He reached into his backpack, took out two coffee cups and filled them before handing me one.  “I even made this from scratch.”

I sipped at the hot chocolate and sat it down.  “That has to be the best cocoa I’ve ever had.  There’s something different about it though.  What is that?”  I picked it up and tasted it again.  “The flavor sits right on the tip of my tongue.”

“Does it?  Here, let me see.”  He put his hand behind my neck, pulled me close and kissed me.  As his tongue touched the tip of mine, he slowly pulled back and lightly tugged at my lower lip with his teeth before letting go.  I opened my eyes to see him looking at me.  “Yes, I do believe that is a hint of cayenne pepper.”  His words whispered across my lips before he moved away from me.

Catching myself before I actually fainted, I smiled at him.  “Is that what it is?  Well, it’s delicious.”  I felt the butterflies in my stomach begin to float around.  Though I was nervous about the potential of starting a new relationship, I pushed the feeling to the back of my head and enjoyed the moment for what it was.  “You know, I just love penguins, they’re adorable.”  I quickly changed the subject to avoid making a fool of myself.

“Did you know that during mating season, penguins gather on the beaches with a pebble in their possession? Each penguin presents their perfect pebble to the mate they most desire, and if the pebble is accepted, they are mates for life.”  He picked up his wrap and continued to eat.

“I had seen that in a movie but I didn’t know it was true.  That is so sweet!”  Again, I giggled like a schoolgirl.

We chatted the entire time we ate our lunch.  There were no awkward silences and it felt as though we had always known each other.  We had so much in common that I was shocked by it.