Courage In Love (11 page)

Chapter 22

“What the hell happened in there?” Ross hissed as he leaned close to Mark. Hector and B.T. laughed and shook their heads as Mark slid an arm around his neck.

“You didn’t know about The Welcome Ritual?” Mark asked and the three of them howled as they watched Parker and Michelle stumble toward them. “Tequila body shots and dirty secrets.” Mark explained. Ross groaned and Parker smiled goofily as Michelle whispered in his ear. Mark sighed as he released Ross. “No doubt, my wife and her crew molested Parker and spilled our darkest secrets.” He narrowed his eyes at Michelle as he took the last of the brats off the grill. Mark wiped his hand across his apron before he offered it to Parker. Ross quickly introduced Parker to the group around the grill before he pulled him aside.

“Are you ok?” He asked as he searched Parker’s face and he laughed as he leaned close.

“I’m so great, Ross. I love those girls.” He declared firmly and Ross’ brows pulled together as he watched the rest of the women make their way across the back lawn. They were all wobbly and giggling. It had been a few years since they’d had anyone new on the team and while it wasn’t at all unusual for the women to get rowdy, Ross couldn’t remember them all being this lit at the beginning of the evening. He looked back at Parker and his head tilted as he tried to gauge how bad off Parker was. Ross had seen him a bit buzzed but never shitfaced.

“Seriously. How much did you have to drink?” He asked as he fixed the top buttons of Parker’s shirt. He’d skipped one.

“Nine shots of tequila and three very delicious margaritas.” Parker announced and Ross cursed under his breath as he shot Michelle a hard stare and she rolled her eyes.

“I’ll be fine. I just need to eat something. Stat.” Parker insisted. Then he leaned close and laughed softly as his lips hovered next to Ross’ ear. “Tequila makes me do really bad things.” He whispered and Ross’ eyes flared and he willed his body to stay calm as he patted Parker on the shoulder.

“Just hold onto that. We probably won’t hang out too long after we eat.” Ross grabbed Parker by the arm and guided him toward the table to make his plate.

Everything was pretty relaxed and it was blatantly obvious that all the wives and girlfriends were in love with Parker. Most of the team was taking it well and despite all of the tequila, Parker managed to impress everyone and was fitting in really well. Except for Jones. Ross would catch him staring at Parker with open hostility and Ross made sure that he was always between them as they moved through the yard. Parker seemed oblivious. Or, he just didn’t give a fuck. Ross had finally relaxed and was reaching into the cooler for another beer when he saw Jones head straight for Parker. He was laughing at something with Michelle and Hector when Jones grabbed his shoulder and turned him. Parker was suddenly serious and stood up tall and pushed his chest out. Jones sneered as he looked down at him. Parker didn’t look scared and if Jones didn’t have at least four inches and forty pounds on Parker, Ross wouldn’t have been worried.

“I hope you’re not letting that pretty white boy make you his bitch.” Jones said loudly and everyone was on their feet. The women were pulling the children away and the men were gathering around Parker and Jones. Ross got between Jones and Parker and pushed Jones back.

“You need to back off and watch how you talk to him, Jonesie.” Ross said calmly as he advanced on Jones.

“What are you going to do about it, faggot?” Jones laughed and Ross clenched his jaw as his temper surged and clawed. He pointed at Jones and gave him a hard look.

“Say that again, and you’ll see. There are children here. If you want to go someplace else, I’d be happy to show you that you’re not as much of a man as you think you are.” Ross kept his voice low as he backed Jones toward the house.

“Fuck that, Ross. You want to go? We’ll go right here, cocksucker.” He swung and Ross leaned back, dodging the blow before Jones’ threw another punch. Ross spun as he grabbed Jones’ wrist and twisted it as he slammed Jones into the side of the house.

“Looks like you’re my bitch, now.” Ross whispered as he tightened his grip and pulled. Jones grunted and tried to break free but Ross pinned him against the wall. “You’re going to treat my boyfriend with respect and watch the language you use around the women and children here, or we’ll go somewhere and I’ll teach you how a man is supposed to behave.”

“Ok. Let him go, Ross.” Mark said calmly and Ross nodded as he stepped back. Jones snarled at Ross before he looked at Mark.

“You’re not going to allow this are you?” Jones asked and Mark’s brows pulled together as he stared at Jones.

“Allow it?” Mark asked and Jones pointed at Ross, then at Parker.

“Are you going to let him bring his fag bitch around our women and kids?” He asked incredulously.

“Enough!” Mark’s voice cracked like a whip as his hand cut through the air and Jones froze. “I invited Parker. He has as much of a right to be here as any of the other spouses. If you have a problem with that, we’ll find you a different team.” Mark raised his brows and waited as Jones gasped in shock.

“You can’t be serious.” He looked around and the rest of the team nodded as they stared back. “No one else has a problem with this?” Jones threw his hands up in the air before he looked back at Mark.

“It’s just you, Jonesie.” Mark said firmly. “You need to decide if you can get over this. I can always find another big guy that can shoot a gun. We both know that there’s no one as good as Ross at what he does.” He looked at Jones expectantly and he deflated. “Have you ever once doubted that he’d have your back when shit got crazy?” Mark asked and Jones didn’t hesitate long before he shook his head and Mark nodded. “Have you ever once doubted that Ross wouldn’t come through when we needed him to?” This time Jones shook his head quickly and Mark smiled. “That’s all that matters. He’s part of our team and if Parker’s his spouse, he belongs here with us.” Mark stated before he turned Jones toward the house. “You’ve had too much to drink. You need to go sleep this off and you and Ross can talk about this later.”

Anita, Jones’ hugely pregnant wife, apologized profusely as she led him away and Parker rubbed her arm soothingly as she walked by him. Once Jones left, the party was kind of flat despite Michelle and Mark’s efforts to tease everyone into a better mood.

“I think we’re going to go.” Ross said gently as he pulled Mark aside.

“Don’t let Jones get to you.” Mark begged and Ross waved it off.

“I’m already over it. Jones will be fine.” Ross believed it, he knew Jones was a hothead but he didn’t hang onto a grudge. He had a habit of getting loud and confrontational when he drank. Jones would still be homophobic when he was sober but he’d keep it to himself and they’d be able to work together without any issues. He was more concerned about Parker. He was still tense. The happy, horny drunk mood had worn off. “I want to get Parker back to my place and make sure he’s ok.” Ross said as he patted Mark on the back. “Thanks for inviting Parker and making sure we both felt welcomed. I appreciate you having my back.” Ross held Mark’s gaze for several moments, letting him see how much his support meant and Mark shrugged before he pulled Ross into a quick hug.

“It’s nothing. I meant what I said about Parker belonging here too.” Mark smiled as he looked over at Parker. “Take him home and don’t keep him hidden away, the women love him.” He teased and Ross blushed as he shoved his hands in his pockets and Mark laughed. “He’s a great guy, I’m really happy for you, Ross.” Mark said gently and Ross nodded.

“Let’s hope they didn’t scare him off.” Ross grumbled before he gestured for Parker to get ready to go.

“Are you ok?” Ross asked as he pulled into the driveway. Parker had been silent the whole trip and Ross wanted to give him time to digest everything that had happened. Parker shook his head softly as Ross turned off the car.

“I’m not sure. The evening’s been a bit of a roller coaster.” He admitted before he opened the door and got out. Ross frowned as he stepped out and locked the car. Parker’s head was down as he made his way to Ross’ door. Ross ducked his head, trying to find Parker’s eyes.

“Look. Jones always says stupid shit when he drinks. I had a feeling he was going to have a problem with us and it would come out but everyone else loves you.” Ross promised as he opened the door and Parker went through. Parker waved dismissively and kicked off his shoes.

“I get that. I saw it coming as soon as I laid eyes on him.” Parker said. “He’s from the South and had a typical, religious upbringing. Seeing a black person and a white person together is still a bit hard for some people from certain regions of the South. It was like insult to injury, on top of the whole gay thing.” He explained and Ross nodded in agreement.

“Then what is it?” Ross asked. He could tell that something was really bothering Parker. He turned and stared at Ross for several moments before his lips tightened and his eyes narrowed.

“What is it that you do?” Parker asked and Ross’ stomach clenched and he started to shake his head.

“Parker…” He was cut off when Parker held up his hand and gave him a pointed look, daring Ross to tell him not to ask.

“You can’t tell me that none of the other “spouses” don’t know more about what their boyfriends and husbands are doing, Ross. I’m not asking for details about where you go or who you’re after. I want to know what it is that you do that makes you irreplaceable.” Parker crossed his arms and looked at Ross expectantly. Ross’ heart started to beat faster and his nerves felt stretched thin as panic flared.

“Parker.” Ross’ eyes were pleading as they met his. “You’re pushing for a conversation you really don’t want to have.” He insisted as he reached for Parker but he held Ross off.

“Not knowing isn’t going to change reality. There’s a reason those women felt the need to pull me into their protective cocoon of trust.” He argued and Ross cringed as he pushed his hand through his hair.

“Maybe they just wanted to cop a feel?” He tried to joke and Parker snorted.

“Don’t.” He warned and Ross squeezed his temples as he wished for some way out of this conversation. Parker had a hard time dealing with what he already knew, this might be too much. “Ross, hiding this from me or lying to me isn’t going to make it better.” Parker said firmly and Ross sighed as he let his head hang in defeat.

“Explosives.” Ross stared at the carpet, he didn’t want to look at Parker.

“What does that mean?” Parker’s voice was low and hoarse and Ross shut his eyes and prayed that Parker wouldn’t take it badly.

“I disarm explosive devices and I’m really good at blowing things up with whatever’s on hand or with a small, well stocked tool kit.” Ross tried to sound nonchalant when he finally looked up at Parker. There was a long silence as Parker stared and blinked at Ross before he took a deep breath.

“Oh. That’s all?” Parker asked flatly as he turned and walked toward the window and Ross bit his lip as he waited. Parker’s hands slid over his head and he made a strangled sound and Ross grimaced and stretched his neck then braced himself. “
Are you fucking serious?”
Parker roared before he turned back to Ross. “I thought that you were some sort of commando that kicked down doors and killed terrorists but it turns out you’re more
The Hurt Locker
.” He clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle a scream and Ross held his hands up, trying to calm him down.

“I do that, too.” Ross offered a sheepish grin and Parker glared.

“Don’t you dare make jokes right now.” Parker warned before he squatted and wrapped his hands around his head. He mumbled something and Ross’ head tilted forward as he tried to come up with some way to minimize the damage.

“Parker, it’s not that bad.” Ross soothed and Parker jumped up and his arms pumped wildly in the air.

“Yes!” He yelled. “Yes, it’s that bad!” Parker insisted and Ross grabbed Parker’s arms and tried to pull him close but Parker pushed him off and backed away. “I don’t think I can do this.” Parker whispered loudly and Ross shook his head.

“Don’t say that.” He begged and Parker’s eyes were wild as he stared at Ross.

“You don’t get it!” Parker insisted and he ran up the stairs. Ross was on his heels as Parker ran into the bedroom and grabbed his duffle bag off the dresser.

“Wait!” Ross caught Parker’s arm and Parker tugged as he stretched for the bathroom door. “Please, just calm down.” Ross urged and Parker shook his head.

“I can’t, Ross.” Parker growled in frustration but Ross refused to let go.

“Talk to me.” Ross reached for Parker’s face but he leaned away.

“You don’t get it.” He repeated as he slapped Ross’ hand away with his free hand. “It was bad before, when you left. I was crazy about you and I was so worried that something might happen. I knew I’d be devastated if you didn’t come back or crushed if you were seriously inured.” Parker’s voice died away as his eyes swept over Ross’ face. “But I’ve realized that you’re probably the one that I’m supposed to spend the rest of my life with. That we were meant to be together but for some reason, you’re in the wrong line of work.” He laughed hysterically and Ross tried to get closer but Parker tilted back and shook his head. “I wish it was one of those situations where you were a garbage man or a gas station attendant and I was just being shallow.” He whispered and stared at Ross’ hand on his arm. “I think I’m in love with you and maybe it’s too late but I have to get out, Ross. If something happens to you, I won’t be able to survive that.” Parker’s voice was shredded and his eyes were flooded with tears. Pain exploded in Ross’ chest and he groaned as he crashed into Parker’s body.

“Parker!” He gasped as he fought off Parker’s hands as they pushed him away. Ross buried his face in the corner of Parker’s neck and held on tight. “Please, don’t do this.” Ross begged. “I need you. Just don’t do anything tonight. You can’t drive right now anyway.” He argued and Parker moaned as he stopped fighting and his hands clutched at Ross’ body. Ross sighed as he felt Parker give in. “Don’t decide anything tonight. Stay tomorrow and we’ll talk about it.” He rubbed his hands soothingly over Parker’s back and silently prayed that he’d find some way to reason with Parker. “I don’t want to lose you.” Ross whispered hoarsely and breathed in deep, trying to hang on to as much of Parker’s body and scent as he could. He’d lost so much in his life and he thought that he was beyond feeling helpless, that being an adult had given him a certain measure of control. As he held Parker, Ross felt every bit as helpless as he did when he begged his mom not to let the CPS worker take him or when he begged her to get well and stop leaving him during her visits.