Dear Adam (16 page)

Eden: Plaster = band aid. Wanker = not
penis. Got it.

Adam: Haha, yes. Fast learner

Adam: I dislike fellatio.

Eden: Well I wasn't offering. Deal is off
the table.

Eden: You're completely outrageous.

Adam: Haha, I know

Adam: It came to my head, and as per the
Adam-Edie Resolution we say what we think

Eden: Well the treaty might need to be
modified and overhauled at some point for the lewdness
contingency.

Eden: With appropriate fines and injunctions
for violations.

Adam: Ha, perhaps it will, we'll have to
see

Adam: And both parties have to ratify the
treaty

Eden: I'll call my barrister and he'll give
your barrister a ring then.

Adam: Sounds good. It'll be good to have in
writing that I can be as dirty and smutty as I like

Eden: Not according to the amendments.

Adam: Haha, Dominatrix

Eden: Well, do I get my good night?

Adam: I like this subliminal take on sending
me to bed :)

Adam: OK have a good night. I hope your
journey home isn't too taxing. Good night

Eden: Aren't you going to say it?

Adam:
https://imtransfer.shapeservices.net/uploads/91378414/VoiceMessage.mp3

Eden: Thank you. It's like pulling teeth. I
hope you get lots of restful sleep.

Adam: Ha, thank you, be good X

Chapter 9

Subject: Thursday

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 4:16 AM

To: Eden E

Morning Edie,

How are you today? Extra hot here and I'm
wearing a coat.

I normally keep a surplus supply of
cigarettes but I'm running out so I'm going to them tobacconist in
a minute to stock up. I like to keep 3-5000 in the house at a
time.

My favourite breakfast, on the rare occasion
that I eat breakfast, is eggs Benedict. I usually stick to the
caffeine nicotine cuisine.

Any plans this evening or do we have a night
of debauchery and phone sex ahead?

Try and be productive at work my dear, the
amount you earn directly correlates to the quality of your
underwear and I am keenly interested in this matter.

Ciao, ciao

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 8:42 AM

To: Adam -

Good afternoon, dear Adam

I had great sleep last night so I'm wide
awake and razor-sharp. Watch out!

Why are you wearing a coat when it's so
hot?

It's going to be 93 degrees here today and
all the shady parking spots were taken by the time I got to
work.

5000 cigarettes. Do you smoke a pack a day?
Two packs?

That usual breakfast of yours sounds
wretched. I love eggs Benedict with plenty of extra hollandaise
sauce on the side. I make mine with thick slices of bacon,
sourdough bread, and some wilted spinach. Is an English muffin
really English?

I do have plans for a night of debauchery
and phone sex. But I can cancel those arrangements and talk to you
instead.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 8:55 AM

To: Eden E

I'm watching out.

I'm sat in the garden listening to opera and
drinking coffee in the sunshine, wearing a three-piece suit. Don't
ask. I have a habit of always taking some kind of overcoat with
me.

You are late writing to me today. Have I
been demoted in priority?

Shady parking spots, oh what you Americans
concern yourselves with. What do you drive? An electric car? :P

On average I smoke a pack a day. If I am
drinking heavily, than can easily double, but the average is a
pack.

I presume the English muffin is really
English. It's very common in the UK, but that doesn't really mean
anything. I make mine with ham.

Wilted spinach? Of course you do. So yours
is Eggs Florentine Benedict.

No, no, don't talk to me instead. Your
evening sounds much more enthralling. Who is the lucky victim?

I bought 12 bottles of Moretti beer, but the
shop was sold out of Amaro Montenegro.

Underwear colour. Discuss.

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:14 AM

To: Adam -

Did you make that whole scene up or are you
just being eccentric?

I was a few minutes late to work because I
was cooking. Then I had to take care of some work-related things
(shocking, I know - me doing work ... at work!)

Have you ever considered quitting
cigarettes?

I drive an old beetle.

Are there occasions that warrant you
drinking heavily? What are you like when you're drunk?

Yours? I presume black.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:19 AM

To: Eden E

Please don't insult me darling. I don't
“make things up.” The suit is because I'm expecting an important
visitor. The coffee in the sun, well, obvious, and the opera,
iTunes decision, not mine.

Work at work? Are you feeling OK? Are you
bleeding? ;)

Why would I? I like to smoke.

An old VW beetle? Jesus, it gets better. Do
you own any cardigans?

When I drink a lot, not a lot happens. When
I drink an inhuman amount, I become reasonably quiet and intensely
observant (more so than usual for the latter). There are occasions
that warrant such, yes.

Always the same. Black boxer shorts, white
vest, all the same style. However, the question was directed at
you.

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:27 AM

To: Adam -

I'm not supposed to ask who your important
visitor is? So who is it?

You let iTunes dictate what
you listen to? Are you sure
you're
not bleeding?

I own plenty of cardigans. And eat granola
copiously at the commune where I was raised. My real name is
Starflower.

Why do you wear a vest as underwear? Don't
you wear it on top of your shirt?

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:34 AM

To: Eden E

A man I used to work with years ago, and
quite a prominent figure locally.

Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Sometimes
I select a genre, then let it do its thing.

The hairiest starflower in the west.

You avoided the question, after I so
graciously answered it.

A vest is a sleeveless T-shirt.

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:45 AM

To: Adam -

My underwear is to be seen in person and not
discussed with someone whom I've never even set eyes upon and won't
do me the courtesy to introduce himself properly.

Oh, we Americans eloquently refer to it as a
"wifebeater."

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 9:49 AM

To: Eden E

Introduce myself properly?

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 10:15 AM

To: Adam -

You're waiting for your important visitor so
I will excuse you.

Good afternoon.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 10:16 AM

To: Eden E

If you're busy/want to leave, please don't
make what I'm doing your reason to leave.

Good afternoon.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 11:10 AM

To: Eden E

Cooking pork loin stuffed with garlic,
rosemary and other herbs and sautéed potatoes with artichoke hearts
and Tuscan beans.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 11:47 AM

To: Eden E

Any chance of you feigning an emergency
today as per your suggestion the other day?

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 12:32 PM

To: Adam -

What are you talking about?

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 12:34 PM

To: Eden E

The other day you suggested making an excuse
to leave work early so we could talk sooner.

----------

From: Eden E

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 12:35 PM

To: Adam -

I can't since one of the other legal
secretaries is leaving early today. I can go to a Starbucks on my
lunch hour and talk to you there. But I can only talk for about 40
minutes.

----------

From: Adam -

Date: Thu, Aug 9, at 12:41 PM

To: Eden E

We could do that :) If it’s not too much
trouble.

"What have I done now?" Adam asked. There was
only the barest hint of frustration in his voice.

"What do you mean?" Eden replied, affecting
nonchalance. She was at Starbucks on her lunch hour, sitting
outside with an ice mocha.

"Well, you've been a bit harsh with me today
and yesterday. Please don't say you're fine. I know something's
wrong."

Eden took a deep breath before replying. "I'm
having a hard time with all this. But you prefer it, don’t
you?”

“
Prefer what?”

“
You being there. Me over
here. You like that thousands of miles separate us.”

“
That’s ridiculous! This
isn’t the way I would have chosen to meet you. But now that we’re
here, we have to make the best of it. What traumatized you so much
that you’re suspicious of everything and everyone?”

“
Nothing happened to me!”
Eden denied quickly, her voice too high. “I understand why you're
not going to give me a photo. But, well --- do you know where I
work?"

"What does that have to do with
anything?"

"I work with the District Attorney's Office,
Adam. I see cases pass through my desk, all the time, with women
who get conned or taken advantage of, and I read their stories and
think, 'Couldn't they tell this guy's up to no good?' It's like
they brought it on themselves."

"So you're saying I'm up to no good?"

"No, but you have to admit." Eden jumped up
and started pacing the courtyard outside of the cafe. She lowered
her voice as people were starting to look at her. "Everything you
say - it may be normal to you, but to ordinary people like me, it
sounds strange. Wouldn't you agree?"

"I suppose so. Don't you think that I have
the same concerns about you? It's as much a leap of faith with me
as it is with you."

"I'm more transparent than you are. You know
what I look like, what I do, where I work. You want to know what
kind of underwear I have on but I don't even have your last
name!"

"You can have my last name," he said with
reluctance.

"Well?"

"It's Carter."

"Adam Carter?"

"Yes."

"It sounds made up."

"Jesus Christ! What about you? How do I know
you're not just looking for some rich fool to take care of you and
your son?"

Eden stopped pacing, desperately trying to
stay the urge to hurl her iPod.

"What did you say?"

Adam must have heard the fury in her voice
because he started to protest.

"Look, I know that's not what you're about.
I'm just giving an example of--"