Derailed (33 page)

“Seriously, Mum. You can ask for whatever amount you want, and it will give it to you. Ask Daddy and Scarlett. They do it all the time.” She whips around to look at Bradley.

With a laugh, he hands me his credit card. “Buy them
whatever
they want.”

“I got it,” I say, refusing his credit card and ushering the kids out of the house.

As we walk on toward the baking aisle in the supermarket, I see a group of mums from Holly’s former school – Margaret, Maxine, and Cathy.

While my kids go nuts on the toppings, I saunter over to them. “Hi girls, what’s up?”  

“Hey, Rival,” Margaret says, “You gotta hear this.”

“What?” I ask.

“Maxine’s date. Hilarious. Maxine’s latest
victim
.”

Maxine is a pleasant but gregarious socialite who is known for her scintillating and over-the-top BDSM-themed parties. I’ve been to two of them and have found them to be highly entertaining. 

“Ah, do tell,” I say.

“Well, as I was saying to everyone,” Maxine says in a low, conspiratorial voice, “this dude, I won’t mention names; he was so green in aspects of BDSM, it was funny. A virgin, I swear…”

I laugh out loud as she regales us with tales about her latest conquest. 

And he says, ‘Maxine you have a lot of aphrodisiacs,’ and I wanted to say,
duh
! But instead I say, ‘Really?’ as if I didn’t know. “And…he’s never even seen
Fifty Shades
. Seriously.”

“Well, I dragged my boyfriend to it,” Cathy says. “He kicked and screamed but I said, ‘You
have
to see it.’”

“I went to see it,” I say in a distracted voice, thinking about Ritchie. “Ended up seeing
American Sniper
instead.”

Maxine points at me. “That’s exactly what he said. So, I feel really bad when I remember him pacing outside my house in my pink maternity shorts, so when I see him at school, I run up to him at school and start to apologize. But the moment he sees me, he backs away. Literally.”

“You’re kidding!” I say.

She nods. “He says, ‘Maxine, I’m sorry, but I want to remind you that you hurt me really bad. Physically. I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to have
any
contact with each other.’”

All of us laugh.

“Seriously, he looked scared shitless. Like, he is a big guy, so for him to be scared of li’l ol’ me?”

We laugh harder.

“‘And we never even got to bake those pies,’ he says. And I say, ‘Okay, how ’bout we start again? Come over this Friday and we will bake. Nothing else. I promise.’ And he says, ‘Nah, nah, nah, I don’t think that’s a good idea, Maxine.’ But I push and push and eventually, I wear him down.”

“Oh, well that’s good, then,” I say. “At least you get to
redeem
yourself.”

“And take advantage of him,” Margaret says, her eyebrows wriggling.

“Advantage? I’m planning to fuck his brains out. I so much wanna, but he’s…I dunno…
slow
in that aspect. Like he’s scared of women. Gotta tread slowly with this one. He had such an amazing, tight arse. Just wanted to ride it like a mechanical bull, but he was already so tense, I didn’t want to risk scaring him away.”

More laughter. 

“But in preparation for him, or should I say,
penetration for him,
check out my arsenal. She points to her shopping trolley. “Strawberries, chocolate, Verve Cliquot –
four
bottles at that, Swiss cheese, water crackers, oysters and prawns – a shipload of aphrodisiacs.” She winks.

“I’ve sent him off to buy stuff to make pies,” she whispers. “He’s out there with a shopping list as long as my arm.”

We fold over with laughter.

Suddenly, her smile vanishes. “Oh shit, here he comes! Don’t say a word. Act normal, act normal!”

Even though we don’t want to, we cannot help it – we all turn around to look at the dufus, huge smiles on our faces. My smile dies when I see Ritchie approaching, balancing puff pastry, a pack of ground beef, eggs, and other essentials for making pies. He’s the dufus? Him?

When he sees me, he slows down and eventually stops walking. Our eyes lock. He looks down, as if to compose himself, then looks up again and walks over to us. 

“Hi,” he says in a strained voice.

While the women around me chorus a greeting, I stand in shocked silence. My hands start to shake, my knees wobble, and it feels like I have cotton wool in my mouth. 

“You probably know everyone, Ritchie,” Maxine says in a sweet voice.

“Eh, yeah,” he smiles.

I need air. “Enjoy your e…evening,” I say as I back away.  

“You too,” Maxine says. “All the best with those cupcakes.” I overhear her say, “Lucky Rival. Rumor has it she’s getting it on with her ex-husband, who left her for another woman. How amazing is that?”

Even though I want to turn back and yell at her for saying that, I don’t. I don’t want to look at Ritchie, or I fear I will fall apart. He has truly moved on. No wonder he didn’t contact me after returning to Sydney. I feel a clamp around my heart each time I think of Maxine and Ritchie, cooking together and feasting on the aphrodisiacs. They will have sex. Maxine will see to it they do. Ritchie will love it – all her toys and gadgets – compared to her, I’d be a nun in the sack.

“I want these lovely flowers too, Mum,” Holly says, handing me a bunch of red poppies.

“Sure,” I say. Quickly, I pay for the items and rush out of the store, eager to get away from Maxine and Ritchie.
Maxine and Ritchie
…their names go well together.

“Mum?” 

I look up at to see both my girls staring at me. “Mm?”

“You’re far away again,” Holly says. “Phoebe called you three times, Mum”

“Sorry, darling.” I mutter as I open the car door and strap the kids into their seats. 

“Hurry, girls, let’s get out of here,” I say in a voice choked with hurt and anger.

How could he?

RIVAL

“Rival!”

I turn around and look at Ritchie approaching my car.

Quickly, I shut the car door so that the kids don’t see me talking to Ritchie.

“Go away,” I hiss as I pack the shopping bags into the boot of the car.

“No, talk to me.” He walks up to me and stands really close to me.

“About what?” I snap. “How easy it is for you to move on? Why you didn’t contact me when you returned to Sydney? No. there’s no need for us to chat. So go!”

He doesn’t go away, so I push him away.

He stands firm and blocks my way.

“Get the fuck out of my way, Ritchie!”

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to hurt you.”

“But you did. It hurts. It hurts really bad.”

“I’m sorry.”

I throw my hands up in resignation.

“I love you, Rival.”

His words make me so furious that before I can stop myself, I slap his cheek.

“I love you,” he repeats.

I slap him again. “Shut up!”

“Rival, listen to me.”

“No! I don’t wanna have to listen to anything you say.” I shove him hard in the chest. “Get out of my way and get out of my life. I’m done with you, Ritchie. I swear on my kids, I will never have anything to do with you again. I swear.”

He grabs my flailing arms.

“Ritchie!”

We both turn to look into Maxine’s startled face.

“Shit!” Ritchie mutters.

“Shit!” I mutter. Now everyone will know about Ritchie and me.

Maxine’s eyes flit between the two of us.

“Shit!” Ritchie mutters again, dropping my arms.

Well, there goes his evening. Good.

“Eh…I just need to get some…some ginger root,” Maxine says.

“Go, help her get her
root
,” I say to Ritchie as I get into my car. “You get yours and I’ll get mine,” I say in a voice filled with spite.

Ritchie’s eyes darken. “You know what, maybe I will.” He says in a defiant manner. “Yeah…” his head bobs.

I give him the finger sign and start to roll up my window.

“Maybe I’ll enjoy it too,” he taunts. 

Fury takes over. I roll my window down, stick my head out of the car and say, “Guess what? I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy it with Bradley. Present tense.”

Ritchie’s face turns purple with fury. “Rival, I will kill you!” he snarls.

“I’ve forgotten how good it was!” I’m out of control and unable to curb my destructive behavior. “He’s the –”

I don’t get to finish my statement, because Ritchie’s boot smashes into the driver’s side of my new Mercedes.

“Ritchie, stop!” Maxine cries.

He doesn’t. He boots it again. Scared of his wrath, I speed off.

“Mum, what is going on?” Holly asks.

I look at her in the rear view mirror.
Oh God, what have I done? With my children in my car too?

“Honey, I…I…” What do I say? “Honey, it’s like, complicated.”

“Uncle Ritchie is really angry, Mum.”

“Um, yeah. Yeah. Sorry girls. I’m so sorry.”

“He’s mean,” Phoebe says.

Shaking, I ease the car into our driveway, turn off the engine and look at my daughters.

“Girls, please…please…don’t tell anyone about me and Uncle Ritchie. Okay? Please. Not a word. Please.”

“Sure, Mum,” Holly says.

Phoebe puts her little finger on her lips.

“Thank you. I appreciate it girls. And once again, I am sorry for my bad behavior. I lost control and I shouldn’t have done that.”

RITCHIE

What the hell have I done? Rival’s kids were in the car when I kicked her door in. Damn!

I drop to my heels and stare at the tarmac. I’ve lost it. I’ve finally lost it.

“Ritchie?”

I turn to look at Maxine. For a few moments neither of us speaks. She has to know by now that there is something going on between Rival and me. I jump to my feet and brace myself for her canceling the evening. It’s okay, I’m no longer in the mood anyway. I’m so angry with Rival, I could just kill her.

“Shall we go?” Maxine asks.

Is she serious? After what she just witnessed? “Eh, Maxine, look –”

“I’ll meet you at my place,” she says and backs away.

“Wait!” I call, but it’s too late, she’s disappeared into the crowd of shoppers.

Surprised that she has asked no questions, and even more surprised that she wants to continue the evening, I get into my Jeep and drive over to Maxine’s place.

My emotions are all over the place – anger at Rival for lying to me, embarrassed that I could lose my temper in front of Rival’s kids, and most of all, sadness. Sadness that my relationship with Rival has finally ended. All that we had, all that we shared, the future we envisioned – gone! Well, fuck her! Fuck
her
, fuck
Bradley
, fuck
everyone
! I punch at my steering wheel. As I drive, my throat constricts and my energy just dissipates. Feeling drained, I pull into a petrol station, switch off my Jeep, and stare into space.

My phone vibrates. It’s Maxine.

Waiting for u

Feeling at an all-time low, and in need of a drink, I slip my Jeep into gear and drive to Maxine’s. I can’t wait to get plastered. It’s the only thing to do right now.

It’s easier said than done, because strangely, I do not enjoy drinking. Sober and distracted, I keep zoning out, and overall I’m lousy company. The evening is a total disaster. Eventually at around 9:30 p.m., to Maxine’s disappointment and amidst her protests, I leave. 

Damn you Rival! Damn you!

RIVAL

When we get inside the house, Bradley’s team is still around, and Scarlett appears to be in a foul mood. “People wear leather belts, leather shoes, snakeskin, crocodile skin – all sorts of animal skin. What’s the big deal?”

“Hey, girls!” Bradley says, appearing eager to take a break from his meeting. Both girls run up to hug their father.

“Did you buy me anything nice?” Bradley asks as he kisses and hugs them.

“Yeah,” Holly says. “We bought a ton of stuff. Freddo Frogs and gold coins and…”

“And Uncle Ritchie, he kicked Mum’s car door, Daddy,” Phoebe says.

Oh God!

“Wha…?” Bradley squints at Phoebe, then looks at me. “What door?”

“Mum’s car door,” Phoebe says. “Mum lost control and…and she hit Uncle Ritchie, and Uncle Ritchie, he kicked the car in and Mum was screaming.”

“Phoebe!” Holly says in an exasperated voice. “Mum said not to tell, Phoebe.”

With Phoebe in his arms, Bradley hops to his feet and races outside to look at my car.

With a laugh, Scarlett also rushes outside. Slowly I drag myself to the doorway and watch Bradley inspect my car door.

“Are you serious?” Bradley says as he looks at the damaged door. “That…cu…dog did this?”

“OMG!” Scarlett says, her palms on her cheeks, her eyes bright and shiny with excitement.

“Yes, Daddy. Mum do this…” Phoebe slaps her face, “then push his chest.”

I groan inwardly as the situation grows from bad to worse.

“And she use the bad word, Daddy.”

“When was all this?” Bradley asks.

“Now,” Phoebe says.

“Now?” Bradley’s eyes fly to mine.

“Phoebe!” I mutter, palm to forehead.

“Is that a fact?” Bradley asks, his eyes turning granite.

“Daddy, can you buy me a turtle?” Phoebe asks, playing with the button on her father’s shirt. “Janey King has two teeny tiny ones and she takes them for walks and stuff.”

Bradley doesn’t answer, he just looks at me with piercing eyes. 

“Out of the mouths of babes…” Scarlett says with a chuckle. 

Without a word, I turn and walk into the kitchen to bake cupcakes with the kids.

Bradley doesn’t say anything else to me because of the visitors, but I hardly hear his voice again. I know that the moment Bradley is done, there’s going to be a showdown. Shaking and on the verge of tears, I somehow manage to bake the cupcakes.

Hours later, I have put the kids to bed and make my way downstairs. I find Bradley pacing at the foot of the stairs, no doubt waiting for me. There is nothing I can do now except to face his wrath. Taking a deep breath, I drag myself down the stairs.