Derailed (35 page)

I nod as tears of absolute heartbreak scald my flushed cheeks. “I just have a few s…stipulations.”

His back stiffens.

“I have grown fond of the kids, so promise me when you live away from me, you won’t stop them from seeing me. If they
want
to see me sometimes.”

“S…sure.” His shoulders relax and he throws down the stuff in his hand.

“I need a hundred thousand for a deposit on a property of my own. That’s fair, so can you arrange that?”

“Absolutely!” His relief is tangible. He takes a step toward me. “What else?”

I shrug.

“I’m so sorry, Scarlett,” he says in all sincerity. “I really am.”

I nod. “There is one more thing…my family – my sisters are going to laugh at me when they hear that my marriage is over, and that is going to be so humiliating. So I ask that you accompany me to tomorrow night’s dinner and help me save face. One last time.”

“Sure. Sure. Absolutely. But…how…?”

I stare at the carpet as I chew on my thumbnail.

“What? What is it?”

I look up at him. “This sounds so awkward, but can we let them think I ended the marriage? Just so I can save face?”

“Sure, Scarlett. Absolutely! Ab…sol…utely!”

“If we can announce our split on Monday or so, that will be great. So tomorrow night, if you could attend as a couple and pretend that all is well? Put on a little show…”

“Absolutely! I’ll put on the greatest show –”

“And dance with me one last time to my favorite song?”

“Absolutely!” Yes, a series of absolutelys born out of rampant relief.

“Thank you, I really appreciate this. And I want you to know that I will always have your back, because no other women c…can love you like I do. But it’s been a rough couple of months, and it’s time to stop the bleeding, end the pain.”

“Scarlett…” He takes me in his arms and hugs me tight. “I’m so sorry things didn’t work out.” My husband, whose gut clenches whenever he thinks of me, is holding me in his arms. Holding me
tight
. I fight back tears.  

“I’m sorry too, Bradley,” I say, clinging to him.

He holds me tighter. My husband, who hasn’t held or touched me in months, is hugging me. Overwhelmed, I give in and allow myself to unravel – I break down and cry. Bawl. Louder than Rival did. I can’t help it. I am giving Bradley, the man I love with all my heart, the only man I ever loved, his freedom. I’m unchaining him, making the biggest sacrifice of my life. How can I not be overwhelmed with my unselfishness? How can I not be emotional over my poignant loss? How can I not allow myself the luxury of tears? People
can
change for the better. I am living proof of that. You wanted a happy ending – here it is.

RIVAL

When Bradley’s number lights up my phone the next afternoon, I’m relieved. I’m also scared.

“You called?” His neutral voice doesn’t tell me much.

“Can we talk, Bradley?” 

“Why?”

“I want to apologize.”

“You don’t need to, Rival.”

“Bradley, please.”

“I will see you if you promise not to apologize.”

“O…kay.”

“Say ‘I promise not to apologize.’”

I’m really confused at his absence of anger. I’m equally confused that his voice is
playful
even. I decide it’s best not to question it. “I…I promise not to apologize.”

“Good.”

We arrange to meet at our local park so we can talk without Scarlett listening in. He enters my car and smiles at me. A beautiful, carefree smile. Relief deluges over me.

“What happened to your hand?” I ask, nodding at the bandage.

“Rival, it’s time to tell you the truth,” he says in his attorney’s voice, ignoring my question, “so I’m going to do just that.”

“Okay.”

“I’ve decided to leave Scarlett.”

“Oh?”

“Prior to this, I was unable to, because…because she threatened to take the house. It’s solely on her name and…”

I gasp. “Soley?”

“Yes.” He nods. “Yes, I
stole
the house from you, Rival. I put it in her name – I did that. I shouldn’t have, and I’m sorry. But don’t worry, because shortly after that, I got what I deserved – she fucked me over. Yes, not only did I hoodwink you, but through devious means I
defrauded
you of the kids, and, well,
everything
t…hat was rightfully yours, and…I am ashamed of it.” His eyes well up and he swallows hard.

“Bradley –”

He holds up his hand. “I
really
need to speak, Rival.”

I nod.

“Thank you. True, I now know that Scarlett switched your medication, but I swear, Rival, I swear on Holly and Phoebe, I didn’t know about that back then. I got caught up in her web and I…I was weak and I…I…Rival, I’m sorry. From the bottom of my heart, I apologize to you. If you don’t accept my abject apology, I will not blame you. But I’m going to do the right thing – I’m setting you free. Go to Big, be with him and be happy.” He’s said it last night and he’s saying it again. He must mean it. Yet, I’m not about to rejoice. I have too many questions to do that. 

“Wh…what about you and the kids?” I ask.

“Once the house is mine again, I will sell the house, give you what is rightfully yours, and start my life again. Then I will move into an apartment with the girls.”

“An apartment?”

“We’ll be okay, Rival, seriously, we will. See, I crave simplicity and the mundane. I want anonymity. Badly. So, I will be putting my political aspirations on hold for now. Want to give my kids my
full
attention. I want to be whole again, Rival. I want to become the father I once…I once was.”

At a loss for words, I stare at him.

“Now that I have looked in the mirror, really studied myself, I have such clarity, that I feel like…” he raises his face to the skies and throws out his hands, “I have the
blinds
of my life thrown open.” His laugh is warm and genuine. When last did I hear him laugh like that?

“If you should
ever
decide to come back to me – that would be great. Awesome really. But…it will have to be by your own volition. No more threats, no more blackmail from me. Granted, I won’t be eating dinner with you and Big anytime soon, and I don’t think I ever will, but you can’t blame me for feeling this way, right?” 

“Bradley, I…I…” I shake my head, not knowing what to say.

With a smile, he reaches over and touches my face with his uninjured hand. “I want you to remember this quote: ‘A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy
.
’ It’s by George Jean Nathan.”

“Wow! That is deep, Bradley.”

Holding on to my face, he says, “I came across it some time ago and I thought about you.” He smiles. “Although with
you,
I feel tenderly drowsy as
well
as electrified. Go figure.” He leans in and plants a tender kiss on my lips.

I let him.

“I love you. You’re the only woman for me. I’ve realized that now.” He releases me.

Shell-shocked – that’s what I am.

“Is there anything you want to say to me?
Besides
apologizing?”

“But, Bradley, I wanna apolo –”

He puts his uninjured hand over my mouth. “Don’t. Never apologize to me.”

When I nod, he removes his hand.

For a moment or two, we sit in silence.

“Want to hear something crazy?” he asks.

“Sure,” I say.

“I miss him,” he whispers, his eyes welling up again.

I know who he’s talking about.

“I really miss my friend.”

My heart goes out to him when I see his raw pain over the loss of Ritchie. We lapse into silence again. This time I break it with a confession. “I stole Scarlett’s book.”

His eyebrows shoot up.

“I stole her book, Bradley. I published it and –”

“My God, she was telling the truth!”

“– I even published a sequel. I got a ton of money for it. I set you guys up with the robbery, the jewelry –”

“WHAT!” he slams back into his seat, his eyes wide with shock.

“– and stuff…and…what else? Oh, yes, I stole the BMW. Yep that’s ’bout it.”

His eyes become larger. 

“Oh, and the money from your safe – I stole that too.”

Silence.

“I found her diary, I read what she did to me, and at first I thought of going to the cops, but then I thought, what if they don’t believe me? So I got back at her.”

Silence.

“Sorry.”

Silence.

Suddenly he bursts out laughing.

It’s my turn to be shocked. “Wha…”

“You did all that?
You
?”

“I…well…I mean…yeah, I did
all
that.” My chuckle is one of relief – he’s not mad at me.

He leans back and looks at me. “I didn’t know you could be this…this
way
. Such a criminal.” Yet his voice drips with pride.

I lift and drop my shoulders. “Bradley, I didn’t know I could be this way either. But I felt cornered and I felt I had nothing to lose, so I ploughed on and, I am not proud of what I did.” Then I smile. “Actually, Bradley, I
am
proud of what I did. I’m so fucking proud of what I did! You have no idea. Seriously.”

He stares at me. “Who are you?” he whispers.

My shoulders lift and drop. “I am Rival Murdoch, and this is me being honest.”

He laughs. Slaps the dashboard, and roars with laughter. I start to laugh too. Then he swoops down and kisses me again. This time his kiss is brief, but deep.

“I had no idea you could be such a little devil,” he says, tipping my nose with his finger.

“All of us have a little Scarlett in us, I guess.”

His smile vanishes. “Don’t say that. Don’t ever say that. You are
nothing
like her.”

“Okay.”

He reaches to hug me again. “Feels like I’m in a dream,” he says. “Surreal, really. But I’m really excited to be starting all over again. It’s like I’ve shed a backpack of stones. Seriously.”

“I get it.”

We smile at each other. “I love you,” he says. 

“I love you too, Bradley,” I say, meaning it.

When I leave Bradley, I’m feeling incredibly light, but I still would have liked to have been able to apologize for saying those awful things to him. I make a decision that the next time I see him, I will not be gagged. I will apologize and discard
my
backpack of jagged rocks.

Right now, I have another pressing issue – how do I let Bradley and my two little kids live alone in an apartment while I move on with my life? How do I let him be a single father to two girls? I know women the world over are faced with this situation every day, when the father of their children leave them for another woman. But could I do it? What about Bradley and me? Could I live with him, take up where we last left off? Could I, for the children’s sake, let bygones be bygones, forgive and forget, and let go of the past just like that? An anguished groan escapes my lips as my conflict rages.

But, I need to put things in perspective here: I am finally free, I have my old Bradley back, Scarlett will soon be history – how can I not be happy? I am happy. No time to worry about conflict, about tomorrow. Live in the present, in the “now.” I. Am. Happy. That’s all that matters. I wrap my arms around my body and hug myself. I am free! 

When I think about Ritchie, my smile fades. Imagine, I have my freedom, yet I can never go back to Ritchie. It’s over, done, our relationship is history.
I
made sure of that. My happiness evaporates.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Random Seduction Tip

No matter how serious and in control your mark appears, he has the innate desire to experience romance and adventure. Do not be fooled by the manicured façade of your mark. What appears to be resistance to your seductive powers is merely a smokescreen. He is often in need of amusement and pleasure, the thrills and spills of an emotional roller coaster ride. The more daring, the better. Most seducers will choose to pass on this kind of mark, believing he is immune to their powers of seduction. Patience, which is of paramount importance when it comes to seduction, is needed here in spades. Bit by bit, little by little, you tear down his walls, his forts, and eventually, capitulation – he will wholeheartedly surrender to you, grant you the controls to his life and allow you to release him from the limitations of his burdensome life. You are fluid, fun and frivolous, and your mark will perceive you with rose tinted glasses – instantly Photoshopping all your imperfections and disguising whatever limitations you may have.

SCARLETT

I walk up to Bradley and dangle the small white packet in front of him. He’s just come back from seeing Rival at the park. (I followed him just to see what he was up to. Habit. Hey, he’s still my husband, you know. I have every right to stalk him.)

He holds up both hands. “Thanks, Scarlett, but I’m taking the straight and narrow from now on.”

I nod at his newfound confidence, his newfound clarity, and at him using my name. “Don’t mind if I do,” I say. “I’ve got a lot going on tonight, and if ever I needed a crutch, tonight is the night.”

“Sure, Scarlett,” he says in an affable voice – one that I have to get used to all over again.

An hour later I catch him pacing in the lounge, a deep frown on his forehead. Nerves. Having to deal with my family and rehearsing for our Broadway act can be rather unsettling. A snort will help him cope, but he’s being stubborn.

A while later, I glide downstairs, looking resplendent in Ellie Saab. My floor-length gown is cloudy lavender, off-the-shoulder, and fits to perfection. My hair has been curled and is piled high on my head, my stilettos are ankle laced and my makeup is flawless. I know I look stunning, nobody has to tell me that. Dare I hope for a compliment from my “original” Bradley?

“You look nice,” he says.