Don't Turn Back (Coming Home Book 1) (46 page)

I stare down at the gas gauge and breathe a sigh of relief—I’m so thankful I filled up with gas earlier today. This means I can drive for several hours without needing to stop. I glance in my rearview mirror to see if I’m being followed. While I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary when I left the apartment, I am terrified that Brian is lurking around a corner or trailing several cars behind me. The closer I get to the interstate, I notice the traffic becomes somewhat lighter, with more distance between the cars in front of and behind me.

I merge into the proper lane and catch myself driving slightly faster than a speed I am comfortable with, but I feel every second, every mile, is valuable at this point. The sooner I can get away from him, the better I will be.

I can’t remember the exact time I actually left the apartment, but I feel like I’ve been driving for hours now. Just when I start to relax, I glance in my rearview mirror and notice a car lingering a safe distance behind me. I tell myself it's just my imagination—I’m safe now, no one knows where I am. The car continues to stay behind me past the next several exits, and I give in to panic mode.
No, he can’t be behind me! I can’t let him catch me!

Up ahead, I notice a truck I’m slowly approaching. I quickly run ideas through my head and decide instead of passing it, to reduce my speed to match that of the truck. If this is Brian behind me, I can always alert the truck in front of me by honking my horn or flashing my lights to show that I’m in trouble. I look over to see my phone in the seat beside me should I need to reach for it quickly.

The closer the vehicle gets, the tighter I feel my throat closing. I am sweating profusely. I keep telling myself to breathe, but right now, I just need to know I am safe. The truck suddenly turns on its blinker to indicate its plan to exit to the right, just ahead. I tap my brakes, and impulsively turn my blinker on as well.

I am staring so intently in my mirror and not paying attention to the truck ahead, so I have to slam on my breaks quickly to avoid a collision as the truck slows. The vehicle behind me is closing in on me now.

Just as the truck drifts off down the exit, the vehicle behind me moves over to the left lane and drives right on past.

You’ve got to be kidding me!
I take in a deep breath, and exhale a sigh of relief. I watch as the vehicle passes and see it’s a small SUV. I can’t believe I got so worked up for nothing.
How could I have confused an SUV with Brian’s midsize Honda?

I laugh out loud and think how I’ve let Brian break me down to the point that I think I’m going crazy. I can’t even tell the difference between two vehicles.

Rather than taking the exit behind the truck, I notice a sign indicating a rest area is nearing. I need to get some fresh air to clear my head, and I could use a bathroom break. There are no other vehicles behind me now so I feel relatively safe pulling off of the highway. I park underneath a well-lit area near the restroom facilities, and sit for a few minutes, just to regain my composure.

I stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror and take in the horrific sight. My hair is a bundle of matted knots. I dread having to eventually run a brush through it, knowing how painful it’s going to be. I lean forward to get an up close view of my cheek and the ugly cut. It looks like I did a pretty good job of cleaning most of the blood, leaving just a faint trace of dried blood that easily flakes away using my fingertip.

Before returning to the car, I stop by the snack area and purchase a soft drink. Even though I’m very much wide awake, I need something to calm my nerves. I know it’s not safe for a single female to be traveling alone, especially on an unfamiliar highway this late at night. I pull my purse strap towards the front of my body and grip it tightly. Even though there are only a few other cars in the parking lot, I have yet to see anyone walking around. But one can never be too sure.

I climb back in my car and press the lock button. I stare out the windshield, wondering just exactly where I’m headed. When the urge first hit me to leave, I didn’t give it a second thought. My ultimate goal was to get away as quickly as possible from Brian. Now, I am faced with making a decision that’s going to have a huge impact on my life. There have been too many issues with Brian, and I’m so exhausted trying to deal with them. I know the next altercation with him could be even worse than tonight, and I can’t risk my safety and the baby’s.

I grab the phone from the passenger seat. I have not spoken to my parents since the middle of last week, so I’m not sure of their exact location right now. I know a sudden phone call to them this late at night would only get them panicking, and I don’t know if I am ready to explain everything to them yet. I could call Rebecca and assure her I’m okay, but I know it’s only going to raise a warning flag. Or, I could contact the one person I promised I would call if I ever needed anything.
Todd.

I think back to a few nights ago when Todd and I texted each other all night long. He assured me if I ever needed anything, anything at all, he was only a phone call away. And I believe he was being sincere. I honestly think Todd is one of those people who would give you the shirt off his back and give you his last dollar. People with his character are few and far between. He even made me promise I would stay in touch, like he really wanted me to.

Now, I’m not sure if it’s because of the text I discovered from him before leaving the apartment tonight, but I have to wonder why I instinctively chose to take this direction on the interstate, the direction that could lead me to him, back to someone who made me feel safe and secure. Right now, I would give anything to feel the comfort he gave me the first time we met.

I glance back at the last text and read it several times. I can’t make my eyes move away from the screen. Reading his words brings a calmness over my body; I can’t help but wonder about the ominous timing of his text. Once the screen fades to darkness, I feel the phone slip from my hands. It bumps the side of my leg as it lands on the floor, just between my feet. I feel a sudden twitch in my belly and I immediately move my hands to cover the area. I feel it once more, only this time a bit more pressure. As the fluttering sensation continues, I realize I am feeling the baby move for the first time. This is simply an amazing feeling. I can’t believe my baby is moving around inside my body. And just as soon as the feelings started, they quickly fade away. I move my hands around hoping to feel movement again, but everything is calm again.

I run my hand along the floorboard of the car until I brush my fingers over my phone. I unlock the keypad and read Todd’s text once again. Without thinking further, I hit the reply button and type out a message.

Me:
 
Thinking of you too. Wish I could see you again. Long night.

While I am cautious about the message I send, not wanting to say anything to cause alarm, I know I need to make a decision about where I am headed.
Am I going to keep driving in the direction that will lead me to him?
It only takes a moment for him to respond.

Todd:
 
Was really worried when I didn’t hear back from you. U ok?

This time, I don’t waste any time responding.

Me:
I am now.

Todd:
What do you mean? Now?

I hesitate before confessing. If I am going to seek Todd’s help, I need to do be completely honest with him.

Me:
 
I left him tonight.

Todd:
 
U did what?

Me:
 
I left him. It got ugly. I was scared.

The phone goes silent for a moment and I wonder if I’ve made a mistake. I plug it into my car charger and suddenly it starts to ring. My heartbeat instantly quickens, not expecting it at all. I look on the screen and read Todd’s name. I don’t waste any time answering.

“Hello?” I barely get the word out before I start sobbing uncontrollably.

“Jennifer, talk to me. Are you okay?” Todd’s voice is calm, soothing, unlike the harsh bitterness I dealt with from Brian earlier.

In between the sobs, I manage to say a few words. “I…left him…tonight. I can’t take this anymore.”

“Where are you now? I am coming to get you. Just tell me where you are.” Todd is speaking so quickly that I don’t have time to answer before he’s tossing the next set of questions at me. “Did he hurt you? I’ll kill that bastard if he hurt you.”

I settle enough to finally talk to him. “It got ugly, but I think I’m okay.” I take a deep breath before continuing. “I grabbed what I could and walked away from my apartment. I don’t ever want to go back. It’s just too painful.”

“I understand. At least you got away. Do I need to call the police?”

I cut him off quickly. “I don’t want the police involved. Please.”

“Baby, if he’s hurt you, the police need to make a report. We need to make sure he’s not going to be allowed to come near you again.” He tries to convince me.

“I don’t want to go back there. I just need to leave those painful memories behind me.”

“Let me come get you. Where are you?”

I give him the name of the town I remember reading from the last exit sign before pulling off to the rest area.

“I think I’ve been driving for a few hours now, but I’m not sure exactly how long.”

“Stay put. I’m going to call my dad. I’ll get him to ride with me, then I will drive us back here in your car and he can take my truck. Do you think you are safe where you are now?” He asks.

I glance around, still not noticing anyone. “I think so. There’s not much activity here at all.”

“On second thought, I would feel better if you can keep driving to the next exit. Rest areas are known for bad things and since there are no cops there, just an attendant, I think you’ll be safer. Besides, once I get my dad in the truck with me, I’m going to call you back immediately and keep you on the phone the entire time until we get there.”

I turn on my car and start to pull from the parking area. “I like that idea.” I tell him as I let out a deep breath. “I’m pulling out now.”

Todd hangs up to call his dad. While I drive to the next exit, I start to wonder what I’m going to do once I see him again.
How is he going to react once he sees my cheek? Is he going to think I’m crazy for going back to Brian after the episode he rescued me from the first time?
I close my eyes and try to believe that I’m doing the right thing.

I’ve always had a passion for books and reading for as long as I can remember. In fact, you might call me crazy, but when I buy a new purse, the first thing I notice is whether or not it’s big enough to hold my e-reader or a regular book, not the color, price, style, or brand name, like most women. Some form of a book goes with me everywhere I go.

I attended my first author signing (as a reader) earlier this year, and I was completely blown away at the number of women who supported Indie authors and the many heartfelt stories they have shared with us over the years. It got me to thinking how much I would enjoy sharing my own stories with everyone. I played around with the idea at first, before getting serious. Thank you to Jennifer Byrd, Karin Lewis, Crystal Jones, Jill Williams, Stephanie Laughman, and Charity Wilson for encouraging me and telling me “You Can Do This!” I’m ready for another road trip ladies.

Even though I have never met her personally, I have to say that author Ashley Beale has been gone above and beyond sharing her knowledge, words of encouragement, answering all of my questions no matter what time of the day or night, and giving me such incredible support. I am thankful for her street team as well, as they, too, have offered their support in my journey. With all of your “likes” and “shares,” thank you, Ashley, for everything.

To my co-worker, Lea Paul, I can’t thank you enough for your support. You have listened to all of my stories and given me the greatest feedback. I have appreciated it more than you know.

I would also like to thank Lisa Karafa with Penny For My Thoughts Book Blog for stepping out to help me the very first week I created my author page.

Next, I would like to thank Kyla Stein with Missed Period Editing Services. Kyla has been very pleasant to work with and has provided excellent service to me, being a “newbie” Indie author. Kyla was very supportive, and I am thankful for all of her recommendations to make my story complete. I can’t wait to start on the next book with her.