Dusk (Young Adult Paranormal Romance) (13 page)

“What?”

He opened his candy bar, offering one of the pieces to me, and said, “We can teleport.”

“No way!”

Holy freaking cow! My mind spun like a tilt-a-whirl at the county fair.

“Not with any loud noise or huge gust of wind or anything you might see in a sci-fi movie. It’s more like we just will ourselves to a different place. Comes in handy when we’re on assignment.”

“Assignment?”

“The Boss,” he said, pointing his index finger up toward the sky, “assigns us to certain people or situations, to help things work out in the best possible way.”

And just like that, the wonder of all that Adrian was became a weight in the center of my chest as I realized the
why
of his presence in my life.

“I’m your assignment.”

There was some comfort in the fact that the
Boss
, as Adrian referred to Him, had taken such an interest in my situation, but knowing that I was an
assignment
to Adrian cut deep.

“Yes,” he said, tentatively reaching for one of my hands. When I didn’t pull away, he grasped my fingers and continued. “But not
just
an assignment.”

“I bet you say that to all the girls.” Cliché, I knew, but it was the best I could do to make light in this situation that, despite my efforts to push him away, was breaking my heart.

I didn’t want to be his assignment.

“Zoe, do you remember when I told you that I was happy?”

I nodded. I’d never forget that moment. Ever.

“Do you remember that I said I didn’t expect to be happy? That I thought coming here was just something else I had to do?”

“I remember.”

“I meant that,” he said, squeezing my hand again. “I’m happy. With you.”

I didn’t even remember what happiness felt like anymore, but I figured what I felt with Adrian was something pretty close. But there was still the matter of the huge mess my life was in, the fact that I had yet to truly forgive my father, and the many, many questions I still had for Adrian.

Since I could do nothing about the mess or forgiveness at the moment, I decided to keep going with the questions.

“Why did you rescue me from the car wreck,” I asked. “Why not just let me get arrested with Nikki and Courtney and learn my lesson the hard way.”

“I think you did learn your lesson the hard way,” he said. “If you’d gone to jail with them, it would’ve only tied you to them even deeper. You’d have had a common problem, a common goal, and what you needed was a reason to leave them in the dust.”

“It worked,” I admitted.

Dusk began to settle around us, cloaking the clearing with the shadows of the trees that surrounded us. Through the trees the sky began to blush an opaque pink color as the sun started its descent. I had always loved dusk. I’d always thought of it as the time of day when heaven was closest to earth, when the sun met the horizon and the sky glowed with color.

I couldn’t help but think it fitting to be here with Adrian, at this precise moment.

“I’ve never told anyone what I am.” He shifted the conversation, as if somehow sensing the overwhelming feelings bubbling inside of me. “Neither has my dad. Well, except for my mom. I never imagined telling anyone the truth about myself, so this is uncharted territory for me.”

“Are you not supposed to tell anyone?” I asked, worried that he might get into some kind of trouble for telling me.

“There’s not like a vow of secrecy or anything, but our purpose is to help the people we’re assigned to, and when we’re on assignment it’s easier to succeed if no one knows we’re there working behind the scenes. I doubt we’d be very effective if the whole world knew we existed. I guess I’m afraid that revealing myself will compromise my assignment.”

“Is there some kind of punishment if you don’t succeed?”

“The Boss is pretty forgiving.” He smiled, squeezing my hand. “But if I fail here, with you, I won’t be able to forgive myself.”

“What exactly is your assignment?”

“To help you forgive your father, and yourself.” He scooted close enough that our knees touched. “So that your life can go on.”

“I haven’t been very accommodating, have I?” It dawned on me just how much he’d sacrificed to come here, to help a girl he’d never met. He lived a life that revolved around serving and helping other people. And so far I’d done precious little to make his job easy.

“You’ve made progress,” he said with a smile. “This is my first solo assignment. Until now I’ve worked with my dad, so I’ve seen the whole gamut of situations.”

The sun dipped lower, lighting the sky in a bright orange. The sunset reminded me that I’d promised my mom I would be home early.

“As much as I don’t want to, I’ve got to head home before long,” I said. “Mom reluctantly let me drive my car, and I know I’m still on thin ice with her, so I can’t be late.”

“Okay.” He touched my cheek, the gesture sweet and reassuring. “I’m glad we talked. Glad you know the truth about me, awkward as it is.”

“Before I go, I have to know how you made that video.”

His eyes dropped, and he shoved one hand through his hair. Clearly he was uncomfortable with the subject.

“Please,” I asked. “I’m really really grateful, but I need to know how you did it.”

“There are other abilities,” he began. “Things I haven’t told you about yet.”

I pressed on. “And they helped you record a video you were in no position to record how?”

“I can manipulate time. Revisit places, events.”

Already on overload, my brain threatened to explode or shut down completely. “You mean time travel?” I barely choked out the words.

“Not exactly,” he said. “I can’t go back and be a part of a previous time. I can go back and observe, but not interact.”

“So no one would be able to see you?”

“Right.”

“You jumped back to that moment didn’t you?” Finally the pieces began to fit. “You went back and watched Nikki steal that stuff out of Mr. Austin’s room and then stow it in my locker.”

“I could see you from the lobby, and I knew Courtney was at your locker. I was worried about you. I could see beyond her a bit, and it was obvious she was trying to block your view of whatever was going on. I caught a glimpse of Nikki coming out of Mr. Austin’s room. I knew they were up to something but I wasn’t sure what. When I heard later that you’d been suspended for stealing something from Mr. Austin, I realized what they’d done.”

“And you went back to watch,” I breathed, pretty much in awe of what he’d done for me. “That’s when you recorded that video.”

He nodded.

“Thank you,” I said. “Again.”

“Revisiting is not a skill we’re supposed to throw around frivolously. It’s only supposed to come into play when it will benefit the assignment. Using it for personal gain or for entertainment, well, it doesn’t look good on the resume.”

“But this wasn’t for your personal gain,” I said. “You didn’t do it for yourself. You did it for me.”

“Everything I do for you is also for myself,” he replied. “Feeling the way I do about you, everything I do to help you benefits us and what’s between us. I’m still trying to decide if revisiting that moment was for the good of this assignment or just because I was so pissed at the two of them for framing you.”

“I think it was probably both.” I reached for his hands, which were clenched into tight fists on his knees, forcing his fingers to relax as they curled around mine. “Being accused and punished for something I didn’t do was going to push me over the edge. I was already totally freaked out about Courtney’s mom and my dad. Then Viv got mad at me, and it was like everything was falling down on top of me. This morning I didn’t care what happened. In my mind, my life was ruined. And now I have hope again.”

I made sure his eyes were on mine when I finished. “Because of what you did.”

I kissed him then, as much for myself and my own desires as for guaranteeing him that he’d done the right thing for the right reasons. He’d not only rescued me, he’d done it thinking there might well be consequences for his actions. He’d
risked
for me.

His hand came against my cheek, the gentleness almost breath-taking. We lingered there a moment longer, both of us reluctant to move.

When he pulled back, it was only a breath. “When you’re ready, I can take you back. You can revisit moments in the past that might make a difference. Things that you didn’t see when it was all going down.”

“You mean see my dad again?” The thought that that was even possible made my head swim.

“When you’re ready,” he repeated.

My heart raced with the yearning to say
right now.
The thought of seeing my dad again, of maybe finding some sort of closure, dangled in front of me like some kind of drug that was necessary for my survival. But the sun was even lower in the sky and I knew I needed to get home.

And I knew I needed time to digest everything I’d learned tonight and all that was now possible.

Adrian was right… when I was ready.

L
ying in bed later that night, I realized I felt more at peace than I had since before my parents separated and my family imploded. The talk with Adrian had been therapeutic, not only because I finally knew the truth about him, but because I’d given voice to the fact that I had hope again.

It was like saying the words out loud had somehow made them real.

And, indeed, in the dark of my room, with moonlight peeping through the curtains, hope simmered quietly in my heart.

Peacefulness didn’t exactly equate to easy slumber. So much information circled through my mind, that it was difficult to turn the thoughts off. Moment after moment passed while my brain continued to process it all.

Eventually, however, sleep came.

I drifted into the scene like a mist that rolled silently off the water. I recognized the kitchen of my house, and my parents sitting at the table together. I wasn’t so much
in
the room as I was a
presence
about the room.

I remembered this day. Two weeks prior I’d come home to find my parents at the table, exactly the way they sat today. They’d asked me to sit then dropped the bomb that had shattered my life.

On
this
day, I’d come home from school, pissed to find my dad’s car in the driveway. He’d been staying in Lexington with his brother, Nolan, since the day he obliterated our family, and I hadn’t missed him. Hadn’t I made it clear I didn’t want to see him again?

Even as the thought ran through my dream, I heard the front door open, listened as angry footsteps stomped toward my bedroom.

“Zoe,” my mom called. “Please come to the kitchen.”

I knew this was not Adrian’s doing. He hadn’t taken me back to
revisit
this day. I’d experienced it the first time. This was simply a dream of remembrance.

I knew exactly what happened.

Mom called again, and I knew I had no choice.

My eyes almost rolled back into my head. Did I really have to go through this again? Hadn’t we said it all the last time he was here?

I threw my backpack against my bedroom door and turned to stomp down the hall, pasting my most sullen expression on my face. If Dad wanted to talk, fine. He could talk. I wasn’t saying a word.

I flopped down into a kitchen chair, folded my arms across my chest, and looked at the floor, refusing to make eye contact with either of them.

“Your dad and I have made arrangements to start counseling,” Mom said. “Separately at first, but together after a while.”

I continued staring at my feet, not acknowledging her at all.

“Zoe, you can’t just…” Mom started to scold me, but Dad interrupted.

“Donna, it’s okay,” he said. “She’s got every right to be angry, just like you.”

I heard her take a deep breath. “Eventually we need you to be a part of our sessions. We need to work through this as a family.”

I lifted one shoulder, completely non-committal.

Mom started to speak again, and I just knew if she defended him again I’d explode.

Dad talked first. “We won’t force you before you’re ready.”

Funny that he was the parent demonstrating the most sense at this moment. Too bad he didn’t have any sense when it came to keeping his pants on.

“And I know you don’t want to talk to me. That’s okay.” He turned slightly to face me, but I didn’t look at him. All I saw was the legs of the chair moving. “I sent you an email. It’s not the way I want to communicate with you, but I wanted to do something to tell you how much I love you. When you’re ready to talk, I’ll be here, ready to listen.”

Ready to listen? Well, fine then. He could listen. “Don’t hold your breath waiting for me to suddenly spill my guts. But if you want to listen, listen to this.” I pushed the chair back from the table and stood up, ready to make my escape once I finished. “You make me want to throw up. I can’t even look at you.” Bile rose up in throat, and I forced it back down. “It makes me sick that your DNA is part of me.” Then I glared at him, looking him in the face for the first time. “You didn’t just cheat on Mom. You cheated on me, too. And I hate you for it. I wish you were dead.”