Dusk (Young Adult Paranormal Romance) (2 page)

Resigned to my aloneness, I closed my eyes and decided more sleep would be a good idea. Maybe the hangover would clear up a bit. I’d need the rest later when I had to face my mom.

*     *     *

I heard my mom come in my room some time afterward. I pretended to still be asleep, hoping she’d go on to work and I could put this confrontation off until later, when hopefully my head wouldn’t feel like a giant bowling ball crashing into enormous bowling pins. But, no such luck.

She sat down on the bed, the mattress dipping only slightly under her weight. I felt her brush my hair off my forehead, the gesture protective and maternal. A lump formed in my throat. Why was she being gentle with me after what I pulled last night? However tender she behaved with me, I was quite sure my punishment would be anything but.

“Zoe,” she whispered. “We need to talk before I go to work.”

I opened my eyes, taking my time just in case the light decided to burn my retinas. Thankfully the headache seemed to have eased enough that I could tolerate the minimal illumination in the room. Looking up at my mom, I had no idea what to say.

“I came in your room last night,” she began, keeping her voice soft and low. “Well, technically it was this morning. You were home by one o’clock, already in bed. After they way you snuck out, I was kind of surprised.”

Confusion swirled in my brain. Somehow I’d gotten home and in my bed by one in the morning. And Mom didn’t sound mad, so I must not have come home in a police car. Which still begged the question – how had I gotten home?

My temples throbbed and I decided I’d worry about how I’d gotten home later. Heavy consideration was sure to bring my headache roaring back full force.

Still, I said nothing to Mom.

“But Zoe, you were practically passed out and you reeked of alcohol.” She sounded more disappointed than anything. And that tone of voice was worse than being yelled at.

I unglued my tongue from the roof of my mouth and managed to eek out a ratchety-sounding “Sorry”.

“Baby, I know you’re hurting, and I know you’re just acting out. I know this is all a result of what happened with your father. I want to help you, but I don’t know what to do to reach you. I’m at my wits end, Zoe.”

If I’d somehow gotten out of that car last night and escaped having to face the cops, I was taking that as the mother of all wake-up calls. No more Nikki and Courtney and alcohol binges.

Good God, had I walked all the way home? Thoughts of what could’ve happened as I’d meandered home, drunk off my ass, were enough to make my stomach turn even without the hangover.

“Won’t happen again,” I whispered. Hopefully she knew I meant it, because I didn’t have the energy or brain function to explain it further. And there was the fact that I couldn’t really tell her about the car wreck and my big epiphany without incriminating myself in the process.

“Well, that’s a change of attitude,” she said. “You’ve been completely unapologetic about your behavior all summer.”

“I mean it,” I said. “No more.”

Mom nodded. “I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt.”

“Thanks.” I managed a half smile.

“Nikki and Courtney were arrested last night. Nikki was driving drunk and crashed her car. She and Courtney weren’t seriously hurt, but it could’ve been much worse. There was marijuana in the car too.”

Holy crap. I hadn’t smoked any weed, but only because I had no idea they’d had it. If not for the police chase and car wreck, I probably would’ve lit up before the night was over.

“Nikki’s mom called me because she thought you might’ve been with them,” Mom said. “You don’t know how relieved I was to find you here.”

Yeah, if you only knew.

I closed my eyes. This conversation was not helping my hangover. The mystery of how I’d ended up at home in bed while Nikki and Courtney were getting arrested was enough to create a headache under normal circumstances.

“I’ve got to go to work, but I’ve left a glass of water and some ibuprofen on your nightstand. Take a couple and drink the water, when you feel up to it.”

I nodded, eyes still shut.

“I’ll check back in at lunch.” I felt the mattress shift as she stood up. “I believe you about not drinking anymore, but I hope you’ll understand that I’m going to have to keep your car keys for a bit longer.”

Yeah, I figured that was coming. And honestly, I was going nowhere in the near future anyway. Unless it was to worship the porcelain goddess.

“You should call Vivian,” she added just before she left the room. “She’s been a good friend to you, and I’m sure she’ll understand why you’ve been so distant this summer.”

And didn’t that lay the guilt on even thicker?

I listened for her car to crank and pull out of the driveway then forced myself to sit up. I managed to make it without falling over, and even more amazing, I managed to maneuver the childproof lid off the medicine bottle. I downed three ibuprofen and half the glass of water, then burrowed back under the covers.

Glancing at my beanbag, I half hoped to find my dark-headed guy again. Of course, he was not there. Just as well. If I’d been drunk enough to bring home some random guy I’d be in way more trouble than I already was. Dad would’ve freaked out to find a guy in my bedroom.

And just like that, the ache returned and settled like a ton of concrete on my chest. Dad couldn’t freak out anymore, because he was dead. And the truth was, after everything that had happened before he died, I wouldn’t have listened to him anyway.

Simultaneous guilt and grief was a nasty combination.

A
week later school started. I still had no car keys, so Mom dropped me off. I’d kept my promise and had not touched another drop of alcohol. Of course, it did help that Nikki and Courtney were dealing with their own drama after getting arrested and were probably in no condition to call me up and offer to provide the stuff.

Thanks to some state funding that came our way three years ago, the new Rison High School was a far cry from the Jurassic era school building where I’d spent my freshman year. In small-town Kentucky, it wasn’t exactly state-of-the-art, but the place looked tons better than the drab gray of the previous institutional structure, and even now it still had that
new school
smell.

The normal summer catch-up talk filled the building, but I heard nothing about Nikki and Courtney’s time in the county lock-up. I figured they wanted to keep that quiet. But in typical high school fashion, there was no shortage of other stuff to gossip about. Apparently, Heather Mossman, a junior, was pregnant. Great. Another statistic. Also according to the talk in the hallways, Tim Fowler and Cody Walsh had gotten into a huge fight at the county fair, which resulted in the police being called and assault charges being filed. Apparently one had keyed the other’s truck over a girl.

Even as I shook my head at the absurdity of it all, inside, I cringed at how close I’d come to being part of the rumor mill. In a school this small, there was nothing worse than being the subject of gossip. It didn’t even matter if what was being said was true or not, people would blather on and on about stuff, exaggerating as they went, and before long everyone was an expert on your life.

Headed up the hall toward my homeroom, I kept my head down and didn’t approach anyone or enter into the conversations. Considering how I’d spent my summer, invisible seemed like a pretty good idea.

Approaching Mrs. Harvey’s classroom, I found my best friend, Vivian Rogers, waiting for me. At least I hoped she was still my best friend. Though we’d talked a few times, I’d snubbed her pretty much all summer, in favor of Nikki and Courtney and the rebelliousness I’d found with them. I had no excuse, no real way to explain myself, other than admitting I’d been a stupid fool. I only hoped Viv would be forgiving.

“Hey Viv,” I said, hoping the contriteness I felt came through in my voice. “I’m sorry I didn’t call much over the summer. I was just –”

“It’s okay.” Viv just smiled, forgiveness and hurt showing equally in her eyes. Even through the hurt, she still tried to understand. “I know you were just fighting your way back after losing your dad.”

“I behaved like a moron.”

“Yes, you did,” she agreed. “Are you done with those two skanks?”

“Absolutely,” I said. “And I really am very sorry. For everything.”

“And I accept.” She nodded her head toward Mrs. Harvey’s room, her curly red hair bouncing around her face. “Let’s head to homeroom.”

Relief warmed me from the inside. Just like that, things were back to almost normal between Viv and me. Well, sort of. She’d accepted my apology, but I knew I’d still need to prove myself to her. Forgiveness didn’t necessarily mean complete trust just yet. But, if Viv could try to get past my stupidity, I had to believe that I could find some part of my old self – my
real
self – too.

*     *     *

Nikki and Courtney made their first appearance at lunch. Well, I figured they’d been at school the whole day, but since I was enrolled in honors classes, and they were… well…
not
enrolled in honors classes, I’d been able to avoid them.

Not so lucky in the cafeteria, which naturally smelled of some bland, generic vegetable steaming away. The two of them stood just inside the door. Though Vivian knew I’d spent some time sowing some wild oats with Nikki and Courtney, she had no idea about the night of the wreck. No one did.

Not even me, if you got right down to it.

“Viv, why don’t you get us a table,” I said. “I’ll be right there.”

“You sure?” she asked.

I nodded. I had to get this over with. I figured the two of them didn’t want word to spread about their arrests, which meant they couldn’t announce my involvement without implicating themselves. But that didn’t mean they weren’t going to try to make me miserable.

As soon as she stepped away, I turned to face Nikki and Courtney.

“You freaking ran out on us.” Courtney’s voice dripped with contempt. It was difficult to take her seriously with her low-cut shirt and ill-fitting push-up bra shoving her cleavage out at a very unnatural angle. Not to mention the cut-off shorts that clearly did not meet the school dress code. Also distracting was her artificial black hair, which looked like someone had resurfaced the black top of a driveway with her head. Combine that with the hoop protruding from her eyebrow piercing, and Courtney was a hot mess. It was a shame, really. She’d probably be kind of pretty without all that.

“Left us there to take the blame for everything,” Nikki added with a snarl.

Yes, I’d been drunk. Yes, I would’ve been in big trouble for that. But I hadn’t been driving, so technically that offense was Nikki’s alone. I decided I probably shouldn’t point that out.

Even with the fuchsia streaks in her blond hair, she didn’t look trashy like Courtney. I was pretty certain Courtney’s dye job came from a bottle she got at the discount store, while Nikki’s came from a pricey salon. And that just highlighted the difference between the two of them. Nikki was the money behind the operation, and Courtney was the tag-along.

“Look, I was just as drunk as you guys,” I said, keeping my voice low. “I barely remember the wreck, much less what happened afterward. I don’t remember getting out of the car, and I have no idea how I got home. I guess I walked.”

“Yeah right.” Nikki stepped closer, putting her face inches from mine. “You expect us to believe that you wandered over three miles to your house and have no memory of it? How stupid do you think we are?”

Answering that question honestly would probably get me punched in the face.

Ebony black hair caught my attention from across the cafeteria. It belonged to a really tall guy dressed in faded jeans and a light blue tee shirt, and even though his back was to me, I knew he was new here. Those broad shoulders were far more imposing than any shoulders that usually walked these halls. Though I mentally willed him to turn around so I could see his face, he tossed an empty water bottle in the trash and exited the lunchroom through the doors on the opposite side. On his way out, I caught a glimpse of what looked like black leather biker-style boots.

Interesting. Too bad I hadn’t gotten a good look at him.

Oh well. Rison was a small school. I’d see him again eventually.

Nikki’s tapping foot brought me back to my unpleasant reality.

“I don’t know what else to say.” I looked at both of them. “I remember pretty much everything up until the wreck, and then it’s just blank. I hit my head when we crashed and after that I don’t know what happened.”

“You skipped out and left us to get arrested, while you came out squeaky clean.” Courtney stepped closer as well. “We’re lucky Nikki’s dad knew the right people to call, but it’s still not over for us.”

“I’m sorry, I really am.” That much was true. I’d been there in that car with them, and I really was sorry that things had gone so badly. On the other hand, I was not sorry that the wreck had scared the stupid out of me. “But I can’t tell you what happened because I don’t remember.”

“We may not be able to prove you were in that car with us, but don’t think you won’t pay for abandoning us to take the heat,” Nikki said, just before the two of them stalked off.