Effortless (44 page)

Waving goodbye to other friends I had made in the class, I hoped
that Cheyenne hadn’t taken a liking to me. I wasn’t sure if she was
interested in boys or girls, things like that don’t usually come up
in candid conversations. Although, when we talked about Kellan, she
often mentioned an ex she’d had, years ago in high school. I was
pretty sure that had been a guy. At any rate, I didn’t want to hurt
yet another person in my life.

But, then again, maybe I was reading too much into it. Cheyenne
was friends with just about everybody in the class. And I wasn’t
exactly a drop-dead beauty that everybody lusted after. No, that
was Kellan…not me.

Laughing at myself, I headed out to the parking area where Denny
was picking me up. Knowing we were shopping together today, I’d
left Kellan’s “baby” safely parked at my apartment, with firm
instructions to my sister for her to not take it for a test drive.
Looking sullen and tired, she’d only shrugged and muttered,
“Whatever.”

Stepping out of his car as I arrived, Denny cocked his head at
me. “What’s so funny?”

Realizing I was still giggling over the idea of yet another
person being enamored with me, I shook my head. “Just realizing
that I think way too much of myself.”

Pursing his lips, Denny shook his head and rolled his eyes. It
was an adorable expression and I grinned. “Right, your self-esteem
is just…obnoxious.” He gave me his charming, goofy grin. “You
should really work on your modesty.”

I smacked his shoulder, laughing as I opened his car door.
Sliding into his creamy, luxurious seats, eagerly anticipating the
warming sensation of the heater installed in them, I looked over at
Denny as he got in his side. He eyed the flower in my hand as he
started the car. “That from Kellan?”

He raised a dark eyebrow at me as I set the flower on the dash.
“Yeah,” I said, a little dreamily.

“Everything…all right then?”

Hearing the concern in his question, I looked back at him, his
dark eyes now concentrating on the road. “I guess. I mean, we
haven’t talked yet, but I feel like we’ve taken a step closer
together.”

Not looking me, Denny said, “But you haven’t talked yet, so
nothing’s really changed.”

I sighed, twisting to look out the window. “No, no I guess it
hasn’t. I don’t really want to talk about it though, Denny.”

He sighed a little, then softly said, “Okay, Kiera. It’s your
relationship, not mine.”

Looking back over at him, I tilted my head. “Speaking of
yours…any word on Abby coming over?”

He visibly brightened as he looked back at me. “Yeah, her
assignment is wrapping up soon. She thinks she could make it out
here by the end of April.”

Denny’s eyes filled with a warmth that I was only used to seeing
in reference to me. It hurt a little, seeing it in connection to
another woman, but it also made me feel good too, in a strange way.
Denny was a part of my life, and I loved him. I wanted him happy
and she seemed to make him that way. Placing my hand on his knee, I
gave him a soft smile. “I’m glad, Denny, I’m sure you’ve missed
her.”

I instantly wondered if he’d had heated conversations on the
phone with her, then thought probably not. That wasn’t Denny’s
style. Then again, it wasn’t my style either…and I’d done it. If
Abby was anything like Kellan, I supposed she could have opened
Denny up to all sorts of new things. In some ways, Denny and I were
too alike. The two of us being with people different than us was
probably a good thing. Opposites attract and all.

Denny looked down at my hand on his knee, then up to me. He gave
me a quick smile but minutely pulled his leg away. I understood and
immediately removed my hand. Some things felt too familiar. Some
lines shouldn’t be crossed anymore. And being so alike, we both
understood that.

Walking through every furniture store downtown, we finally
picked out the perfect living room and dining room set. We even
picked out a bedroom set. And yes, picking out a bed with your ex
boyfriend, knowing that he’ll be using it with his current
girlfriend…is weird.

We both had uncomfortable expressions on our faces when the
salesman made us sit on a mattress together. But then, when we were
lying on our backs, pondering the weird situation we were in, we
both looked at each other at the same time and started laughing. It
was so weird, it had gone into the realm of amusing.

Laughing on that plastic-coated mattress with Denny, I couldn’t
help but wonder what Kellan would say, if he knew where I was and
what I was doing. If he could see us, see how there was mainly just
friendship between us, he might be okay with it. But me telling him
about it over the phone…with no visual to go with the explanation,
it just sounded bad, especially since Denny had been here for a few
months now. The longer he was here, the harder it was to
explain.

Settling on a relatively firm Queen-sized mattress, we picked
out the furniture to go with it. It was beautiful, and I was sure
Abby was going to love the sleigh bed he’d decided on. Running his
hand over the back of it, Denny told me that Abby had this romantic
notion of going on a sleigh ride in the dead of winter. Bundling up
together under heavy blankets, while a couple of beautiful horses
pulled you through banks of pristine snow, light flakes of it
dropping on your hair, sounded pretty amazing to me too. I hoped
that she thought of that when she saw this bed…and having that
thought was weird too.

It was starting to get late when I finally got back to my
apartment. After making the preparations for all his new stuff to
be delivered, Denny had taken me out for a celebratory dinner. His
topic of conversation had all been around Abby, and how excited he
was to show her their new place.

I’d smiled politely, happy that he was happy, but a small twinge
had gone through me at his home being called “theirs.” It didn’t
bother me as much as I’d have once thought, though. Probably
because Kellan sometimes called his place “ours,” and that always
brought a smile to my face. I wanted Abby to have the same good
feelings, even if I’d never met her.

But walking through my door around ten o’clock that night, I was
pretty surprised to find my sister pacing the living room. For one,
she didn’t usually get upset enough to pace, and two, I was pretty
sure she should have been at work.

Pointing at her as I set my bag on the table, I started to ask
why she wasn’t at Hooters. She didn’t even let me get the first
word of my question out though. Twisting to me, hands on her hips,
she spat out, “There you are. Where have you been? I’ve been
calling you forever.”

Glancing at my bag, I realized my phone must have died. I hope
Kellan hadn’t tried to call. “Uh, I was out with Denny. Why?”

When I looked back at her she was glaring at me. “I don’t know
why you hang out with him.” I started to defend him when she shook
her head and raised her hands, interrupting me. “Look, I don’t
really care about you and Denny.” Stepping up to me, she grabbed my
forearms. Eyes wide, she frantically sputtered, “I’m late,
Kiera.”

Furrowing my brows, I shook my head. “Okay, well the Honda is
here…you could have left for work anytime?” I kept shaking my head,
confused. Anna and I hadn’t fought over the car since Kellan had
left the Chevelle for me. And honestly, that was here too, if she’d
really needed to leave.

Dropping her head back, she gave me an exasperated groan. “God,
Kiera, not that kind of late!” Her head snapped back up as her eyes
widened. Voice trembling, she slowly repeated, “I’m
l-a-t-e
.”

She glanced at her stomach and my eyes grew to saucers. “Oh my
God, you’re pregnant!”

Shushing me, she looked around our completely empty apartment.
Like she didn’t want the dust bunnies to hear, she murmured, “I
don’t know…but I’m freaking out.”

Shock dropping my mouth wide open, I asked her all the questions
floating around my head. “How late? When was your last period? How
far along are you? Who was the last guy you were with?” Pausing a
second, I raised an eyebrow at her. “Do you know who the father
is?”

Glaring at me, she dropped my arms and started smacking me.
“Yes! I know who the father is…bitch.”

Attempting to block her hits, I backed up a step. “Sorry. Jesus,
Anna.” Successfully stepping out of her range, I held my hands up.
“Don’t kill me for saying this, but you don’t always stick to just
one guy.”

Her lip trembled and her perfectly green eyes filled with tears.
Dropping her head into her hands, she started to cry. Feeling bad,
I quickly put my arms around her and held her to me. Between sobs
she got out, “I know…but I’ve…only been with one lately…and…oh God,
Kiera…”

She looked back up at me, her face desolate. “It’s
Griffin’s…”

Now my face was desolate. “Oh my God, I was afraid you were
going to say that…” If there was one person on this earth that
should never procreate…it was Griffin. But he had, and now my
sister was possibly carrying his seed.

Clutching her arms, I grabbed my bag and pulled her towards the
door. “Come on, we have to get you a test.”

Surprisingly, she jerked on my arm. She was shaking her head as
I looked back at her, her face looking genuinely terrified. “I
can’t…”

Running my hand down her arm as soothingly as I could, I
whispered, “You have to know, Anna. Either way, you have to
know.”

She still looked spooked, but she didn’t argue with me so I very
gently pulled her forward. Feeling like I was trying to break in a
wild mare that was going to bolt at any sudden movement or sharp
sound, I finally got the freaked-out Anna into Kellan’s car.

But when I turned the ignition, she opened the door and bolted.
Twisting my lips at her through the window, I shook my head. “Get
back in the car, Anna.”

She slammed the door shut and shook her head. “You do it, I’ll
wait upstairs.” Sighing at her reluctance to face the facts before
her, I nodded and backed the car out of the lot. Hopefully, she’d
still be home when I got back. Anna could avoid responsibility with
the best of them. I had no idea what she’d do if the stick turned
blue.

At the drugstore, I picked up one of each kind of test, and two
of the kind that detected pregnancies early. If she’d gotten
pregnant from Griffin, then it had to have happened in Boise, and
that had been just a few weeks ago. It seemed too early to me for
her to test positive, but then, I wasn’t an expert on the subject.
I’d leave that up to EPT.

Wishing my sister had been here to buy these, wishing the person
at the register was a girl tonight and not a twenty-something guy,
I set down my basket full of pregnancy tests, muttering, “They’re
for my sister…”

The man smirked at me, but said nothing. I was sure he thought I
was lying. I oddly felt like covering up, even though I was already
wearing a thick jacket. I don’t know, but buying pregnancy tests
was sort of like buying condoms. It was a flashing neon sign
hovering above you that screamed—
I’m having sex
! Well, I
supposed the tests screamed—
I had sex
!

I hoped I didn’t run into anyone I knew…

Luckily, I didn’t, and I got out of there with bright red cheeks
and most of my pride intact. When I got back to the apartment, my
sister was still there. In fact, she was huddled on the couch under
a blanket, shaking like she’d just watched a horror movie. Sighing
at her, I handed her the paper bag. She wouldn’t take it. Instead,
she dropped her head in her hands and started crying again.

Sinking down to my knees, I put the bag out of sight behind me
and brushed her silky hair behind her ears. “Hey, it will be okay,
sis.” In what I thought was a hopeful voice I added, “I mean,
you’re probably not pregnant. Don’t you use the pill?” I’d used it
diligently ever since Denny and I had started getting serious. I
just assumed Anna did the same.

She looked up at me, her face forlorn. “Most days…”

I bit my lip to contain the rant I wanted to give her. You can’t
go around and sow your wild oats so carelessly. But, she was
freaking out, and the last thing she needed was a lecture from me.
Smiling instead, I patted her leg. “Do you want me to help
you?”

Rolling her eyes, she glared over at the bag I was hiding with
my body. “No, thank you. I can pee all by myself.”

Sighing, I watched as she stood up, grabbed the bag, and stormed
out of the room. I tried to imagine the free-spirited vixen
pregnant…but I couldn’t.

She came out of the bathroom a couple of minutes later, holding
five sticks in one hand. She stared at them, horrified, like they
were going to start calling her Mommy at any moment. “Okay, now
what?”

Walking up to her, I eyed the freshly wet sticks…they were
blank. “Well, I think you have to wait a few minutes, Anna.”

She looked up at me, color in her cheeks. “I have to wait? I
have to sit here and wait to see if my life is over or not?”

“Anna, your life doesn’t have to be over if you
are
preg—”

She put her finger up to my mouth, silencing me. “Don’t say the
p-word. It’s bad luck.” I rolled my eyes at her, hoping she’d
washed that finger, but I didn’t comment on her ridiculous
superstition.