Erotic Refugees (36 page)

“
Really?” Brian said. “Well
that's good news! Nothing wrong with paying customers. And Rob is
paying for his coffees from now on, you can tell him that from me.
Well, go on, take a seat, I'll bring your stuff over.”

The Outback Café had quite a
few customers, all of them trying their best to dispel the November
gloom. Alice knew exactly how they felt, as they stocked up on
sugar and caffeine as if preparing for hibernation. That was one
good thing about the eternal winter in Sweden, though—it made the
cafés very cosy. Sitting around a candle with cinnamon buns, while
the gloom descended and the stinging cold made the air sparkle, was
one of the nicest ways to while away an evening.

She made her way to the tiny
back room and found a free place to sit. Eoin settled across from
her as she removed her long coat and hung it up. She sat down with
a sigh and rubbed her calves.

“
These things will be the
death of me. Who decided to put heels on boots anyway? And it's not
like I need heels, so who am I kidding?”

Eoin made an affirmative
noise but didn’t say anything. So he was in one of those moods, was
he? Alice had suspected from his phone call that something was on
his mind. Hopefully he wouldn’t make her work too hard to find out
what it was
.

Brian delivered their lattes
with a nod and slipped away again. Eoin reached for his glass and
proceeded to spoon foam into his mouth, as Alice watched with a
flicker of amusement. This man was as easy to see through as a
gentle breeze.

“
So Eoin, this thing on
your mind. Tell.”

He looked up, surprised for
only a moment. “Oh right, you can tell things, can’t you? With that
intuition of yours. I always forget.”

“
Well I’d guessed you
hadn’t brought me here just to show me your friend’s
sandwich.”

Eoin grunted in reply and
reached into his bag. He extracted a sheaf of paper and slid it
across the table. Alice folded it flat, looked it over and then
looked up.

“
I don’t get it Eoin.
It’s a dating profile. Do I know this person? Is it you in drag,
maybe? Your fabulous new stalking strategy?”

“
It’s Jenny!” he spat in
exasperation. “Okay, you can’t see her face very well on the
profile photo, but you can on the second page, see?”

Alice looked at page two and
was mildly surprised to see he was right—it definitely was his ex.
“You're right, I’d know those ear-rings anywhere.” She scanned the
photos before turning back to the text on the first page. She said
“hmm” a few times then folded the papers and slid them across the
table to Eoin.

“
I’m still not getting
it. It’s just her dating profile, and it’s pretty tame. She even
mentions she has a kid, and that he’s a priority for her. All fine
and proper. So tell me, why the emergency meeting?”

Eoin’s fluster was not abating
that easily. “But, but, if she’s doing that”—he flapped a hand in
the vague direction of the paper—“then she’s moving on, isn’t she?
She’s looking for somebody to replace me, some new father figure
for Damien. Like I never even existed!”

Alice shrugged. “Well what did
you want? For her to sit around at home and mourn you until her
teeth fell out?”

Eoin looked sheepish. “Yeah, a
bit. Well I didn’t expect full-on dating anyway, her actually out
there and advertising for a better man than me. And yes, I know
it’s unfair of me to feel like this, since I’ve been dating too,
but I can’t help it.”

Alice thought about her reply
as she sipped her latte. She was granted a little more time to
ponder when Brian arrived with the sandwiches. He slid them onto
the table and stepped back with a flourish.

“
A fine half-Sagan,” he
said, “and the first Maher of the day. And if you don't like it,
well, you know which Irishman to blame.”

He slipped away and Eoin began
nudging his sandwich around on the plate, biting his lip as he
studied it. Around and around it went and Alice was pretty sure he
wasn’t seeing it at all. She sat in silence, letting him think.

“
Am I over-reacting?” he
blurted out. “Tell me if I am. It’s just, some other guy, being
accepted as some kind of father to Damien … it’s just all
wrong.”

Alice took a deep breath.
“Eoin, my dearest Irish friend in this whole wide world. Jenny is
out there looking for happiness, just like you. Like the million
other single parents in this city. You’ll have to face that she’ll
probably get a new partner. And one day soon Damien will be
mentioning things this guy’s done or said, and he’ll be a part of
his life. And you might not like it, but tough, because it will
happen. You set the ball in motion, and now there’s no stopping her
new life. Or yours either for that matter.”

“
He’s not becoming a
father to the boy,” Eoin said. “And she if even imagines that
Damien will call him dad, well…”

Alice reached out to pat his
hand on the table. “Look, there’s no need to panic just yet. She’s
just browsing a dating site, maybe only because some friend talked
her into it. You know how we friends can be, right? But if she
really does want to find somebody, then she will, it’ll happen. But
it won’t mean—”

“
But I’m not actually
looking for anybody!” Eoin said. “Not like that! I know Jenny,
she’s got this romantic fairy-tale thing going on. Everything is
I-love-you-forever and candles around the bath and telling each
other what we’re thinking all the time, you know? She actually
believes all that rubbish, all the stupid rom-com stuff she’s been
fed. Like she’ll find true love and her life will be completed by
another person, and fucking rings on balconies in the fucking
moonlight—”

Alice raised a hand, sure that
the other occupants of the café were getting nervous of the ranting
Irishman. Eoin nodded. “Sorry.”

“
It’s fine,” Alice said.
“It’s a bit of a shock, and I know how it feels. I remember when
Nils told me about some new female friend of Johan’s, and I was
scouring Facebook for a week, trying to find signs of a girlfriend.
But don’t be too hard on Jenny, no matter what bullshit she might
believe. She’s only human. And lonely.”

“
Oh God how I wish it was
just Jenny,” Eoin said with a dry laugh. “But it’s the same with
half the dating profiles I see. All these women with their enormous
demands, and their long list of things they want in a partner,
looking for some mythical man who ticks all their boxes. And then
they just moan when they find out he doesn’t exist, as if it’s our
fault and not theirs.”

“
Well, I see the online
dating rot is setting in. I’m surprised it took so long
really.”

“
It does give you a bad
view of humanity, that’s for sure.” Eoin drained his latte,
starting to regain his composure. “But then I guess I don’t
understand people so well. I mean, how can people out there”—he
waved towards the window—“those normal people, how do they find
somebody and just stay with them forever? Do they know something I
don’t? Some secret? Maybe a magic spell?”

“
I think they just
settle,” Alice said. “People take the best one going and they hang
onto them. They just sink their teeth in and never let go. Because
there’s nothing worse than being single, right? You may as well
have leprosy. Or gills.”

“
Well, somebody did tell
me this is the city of the single. You, if I recall.”

”
Right.” She speared a
cube of feta cheese and savoured the delicious salty burst in her
mouth. “You wouldn’t know it though. The way the papers go on, it
sounds like being single is the worst thing that could happen to
you. Like a disease where the only cure is speed-dating. I mean,
the more you think about it, the more you realise it’s true. The
world is built for couples, as if they’re the real people, and the
singles are just real people waiting to happen. And it’s damn
annoying.”

“
Tell me about it,” Eoin
said. “I took Damien to a safari park before the summer and I had
to pay for a whole double room. They had no single rooms with an
extra kid’s bed. Because why would a single parent go
there?”

Alice shifted her chair closer
and lowered her voice.

“
I have a theory,” she
said. “Do you know why so many people in Stockholm are single?
Because they can be, that’s why. They have the money and the
possibility to live by themselves, simple as that. They can get a
good night’s sleep and decide what to have for breakfast and don’t
have to compromise about which part of the paper to read first. I
mean, why build a perfectly good life just so you can glue it to
somebody else? Sure, you run the risk of dying alone, but we all
die alone anyway, don’t we?”

“
But you’re not single,”
Eoin said. “Are you?”

She gave a sly smile. “Well no,
I’m not on the market. But I’ll not be moving in with Andy in the
foreseeable future. I like having my kids every other week, I like
the freedom and flexibility. And maybe that’s a really horrible
thing to say, and it makes me the worst mum in the world, but it’s
true. I like having every other week entirely to myself, and my
mother would have liked that too if she could have done it. Of
course she would. Who wouldn’t?”

“
Yeah, I like it too,”
Eoin admitted, although the guilt was plainly visible on his face.
“I get total contact with Damien for a few days, where I decide
everything, and then when he's not there I get to do whatever I
want. My time is my own. It’s actually quite brilliant, and I know
Damien will be back before too long.”

“
Of course on the
downside there’s the bigger rent, and the bills and food and
entertainment. And not getting invited to couple dinners. Although
the couple dinner thing is actually a bonus. I’d prefer to swallow
my own tongue than listen to another dry pair complaining about
their mortgage, and their fucking winter tires.”

Alice finished her latte and
nodded towards the papers on the table. “Well, as you can see,
it’ll soon get nice and complicated for you. But it will also get
better once Jenny has somebody else in her life. Trust me, it will.
And I suppose I should say welcome aboard, you’re now officially a
modern family.”

Eoin smiled. “So I’m in the
club then?”

“
When your ex starts
dating other people then yes, you’re definitely in the club. And
it’s not a bad club. Plenty of sex in it, at least. But you’re
happy, aren’t you? Despite the fact that you pay more for hotel
rooms and you might die alone?”

Eoin didn’t have to think about
it long before he nodded.

“
Yeah, I am. I’m very
happy. And I haven’t been able to say that for years. My life is
mine to mess up again and it’s bloody great.”

“
Well then, you know what
we should do? We should celebrate. With something totally random.
What do you think?”

“
Sure,” Eoin said. “That
would be nice. How about karaoke? I haven’t done that in
years.”

“
God no,” Alice said. “No
chance. Next.”

“
Pool then,” Eoin said
casually. “Just off the top of my head. Not that I’m any good or
anything, it’s just fun.”

Alice nodded. “All right then,
pool it is!”

She thought she saw something
in his expression, some glimmer of mischief behind his eyes. But
she must have been mistaken. Eoin hated sport, so he couldn’t
possibly be any good at pool. She’d take him for all the loose
change he had.

“
Great then,” Eoin said,
and reached for his jacket. “You’re sure you don’t want to try the
Maher? Last chance.”

Alice looked at the troubling
egg construction on Eoin’s plate. She met his eye and smiled
warmly.

“
Not even if it was the
very last sandwich on earth.”

Chapter
39

Rob stumbled up the stairs with
two paper carrier bags containing every book he owned on
programming and web design. He passed through the shared lobby,
nodding to two vaguely familiar guys sitting on the sofa, and
staggered into what was now his very own office. He slid the bags
across the floor, collapsed in a sweaty heap in one of their two
chairs, and nodded towards the window.

“
Jaysus, was that big
ugly yellow building there yesterday?”

Eoin looked up from his
computer. “I'm afraid so. It's not much of a view, is it? Although
for this rent we're lucky we even have gravity.”

“
I hear they turn off the
gravity on weekends,” Karen shouted from the second room, a space
not much bigger than a cupboard. “Just so you know.”

Rob looked around with
satisfaction. The place was definitely coming along. He and Eoin
had moved their own stationary computers from home so there was
something to work on. They were preparing space in the server
lock-up, where the five other companies on this floor kept their
machines. And they had a range of geeky toys on a shelf (courtesy
of Milly), the required mascots of any successful young web
company. And with those, how could they fail?

“
So when are we getting
some proper furniture in here?”

“
Whenever you can fix a
car for a trip to Ikea,” Eoin said. “As you’re the only paid
employee, I think that's only fair.”

Karen emerged from the smaller
room carrying a few folders she had extracted from one of their
moving boxes. “So where do I put these things?”

Rob pointed. “Bit short of
actual shelf right now, so just throw them in the corner, beside my
desk.”