EXONERATION (INTERFERENCE) (14 page)

“What are you saying?”

I looked up into his eyes and I saw so much pain, I couldn’t do it. I knew he deserved to know the truth, but it wasn’t the time. “Nothing. I just wanted to make sure you really love Shannon.”

“I do love Shannon. She’s a great kid.”

“But?”

“But, nothing.
She’s great.”

Shane was right, he didn’t love her. He only tolerated her...because he couldn’t face losing me.
But, did he really want me, or did he just want to keep me from Shane?
As I looked up into his eyes, I found I couldn’t read him.

“Rebecca, I love Shannon! How could you think otherwise?”

“I don’t know. I guess it’s because you hate Shane…and she’s his.”

“She’s mine, too. Maybe not like this baby, but…”

“No, it’s not different. Would you pay more attention to her if she were yours?”

“Of course!
I mean…Rebecca, you’re not making any sense. What difference does it make? I love you, I love Shannon and I’m going to love this baby. We’re going to have a wonderful life. I promise.”

“And Shane?
Where does he fit in to this wonderful life?”

“He doesn’t! The sooner you realize that, the better off we’ll all be. He can see Shannon, but he won’t get anywhere near my son!”

I stood up and started to walk away. I couldn’t listen to him anymore.

He followed after me. “Please don’t walk away from me.”

I turned to face him. “Why did I wake up naked, when I know I had a nightgown on when I went to bed?”

“We were going to make love, but then, you were so out of it
; I just let you go to sleep. I held you all night.”

“Yeah, I remember that. I
remember you wanted…I’m sorry. I just…I wasn’t up to it.”

“I was!” he said, trying to make me feel guilty.

“I’m sorry. I don’t feel well, and I’m…so tired.”

He hugged me. “I know. It’s okay. We have the rest of our lives. Why don’t you take a nap?”

“No, we have to go get Shannon. I have to share her with Shane now and this is my time.”

“She’s at school,
Beccs…sorry, Rebecca!”

I sighed.
“Oh, yeah. Well, then I guess I’ll go ahead and take a nap.”

“You want some company?”

“Don’t you have to go to work?” I asked, praying he wasn’t planning on spending the day with me.

“I took the day off. I told everyone we were having a baby and I wanted to cater to my wife for a few days.”

“A few days?” I said, praying I hadn’t heard him right.

“Yeah, a few days…maybe a week.
I want to spoil you.”

“That’s um, that’s not necessary.”

“Yes, it is. I have to prove to you that I’m going to be a good father; that I’ll be there for you…for both of you.”

“Don’t you mean for all three of us?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Parker, just go to work, please. I’ll be fine.”

“I want to take care of you!”

“Just go!”

“Rebecca, I’m your husband. I love you. Can’t I be excited about us having a baby?”

“Why can’t you get excited about Shannon?”

He sighed. “How many times do I have to tell you that I love Shannon?”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you. Tell me the truth!”

“What truth?”

“That you resent her!
That you hate the fact that she’s his. That you only signed the birth certificate to get back at him. Isn’t it true?”

He looked away. “I’ve supported you and your daughter!”

“Oh, so now she’s my daughter, not our daughter?”

“She is your daughter. She doesn’t love me.”

“She can tell that you don’t love her. She’s a child, but, she’s not stupid. You don’t have anything to do with her. Why did you offer to be her father if you don’t love her?”

He didn’t say anything.

“WHY, PARKER?” I shouted.

“Because I loved you!
Because if I was her father, then you’d have to stay with me.”

“But, I don’t have to stay with you. Maybe some of what you did was noble, but the more I know, the less noble you become. Is it me you love, or is keeping me from Shane the true goal? If you can’t have me, then no one will? Is that it?”

He stood tall, knowing I’d finally seen through all the deception and lies. “I love you. I’ve always loved you. We were meant to be together, and if I had to take his kid in order to have you, then so be it! That was the price I had to pay.”

“The price
you had to pay? Shannon was a bargaining tool?” I closed my eyes. “I can’t stay here another minute. I’m leaving.”

“Where are you going?”

“I don’t know. Home to my parents, I guess. At least until I figure out what to do. I’ll find a place. I’ll be fine.”

I started to walk away and he grabbed my arm. “You can’t leave!”

“Parker, it’s over.”

“You’re going back to him, aren’t you?”

“I um, no, I’m going to my parents’ house. I need to sort through some things.”

He stepped in front of me. “You’re not going anywhere! You’re my wife! You belong with me!”

“No, I don’t. I’ve never belonged with you. I’ve never loved you. I’m sorry, but it’s true. I don’t want to hurt you. But, I have to leave. I need some time.”

“That’s my baby! You can’t keep me from my son!”

I turned to face him. “Parker…” He needed to hear the truth, but I couldn’t say it.

“What?”

“Nothing. I have to go.”

“You’re not leaving me. You can have some…time, after you give me my son!”

“So, you don’t want me, you just want a namesake; a son to carry on your name?”

“No, I want you, too. I’ve always loved you. But, I know I can’t force you to stay. But, I will not lose my son!”

“What if this baby is a girl?”

He stopped and looked at me. “Then we’ll try again! I want a son! I hope this child is a boy, I’ll admit it. A daughter’s fine, but I won’t stop until I have a son.”

“So, you just expect me to keep pumping out kids until you get the desired heir?”

“Something
like that, yes. You’re my wife!”

“I’m not a brood mare!”

“You are until I have a son.” He walked over to me. “I know this is a boy! I can feel it!”

“Parker…” I wanted to tell him. I tried, but the words just wouldn’t come.

“Please, don’t leave me. I know I’m not saying things right. But, no matter what you think of me, I do love you. I always have!”

“I wish I could say the same. It would be so easy if I loved you, like I love…” I stopped, but not soon enough

“Go on! Finish what you were saying!” he snarled.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“What do I have to do to make you love me? I’ve tried everything! I even studied those damned videos! I try…”

“
Videos
? You mean there’s more than one?”

He looked guilty. “I meant video.”

“No, you said videos. You have more videos of us…together?”

“Yeah, okay. But, I only wanted to try to please you. To see what it is that makes you want him so much.”

“I love him!”

“Don’t you mean
, you loved him, past tense?”

I knew I was going to hurt him. But, I had to stop living this lie. “No, I love him. I always have. I always will.”

“Well, that’s too bad for him, because you’re mine. I won’t let you go back to that son of a…”

“Parker, he’s the father of my child!”

“I know. And, he can have Shannon as often as he wants.”

“He’s not just…Shannon’s father,” I said, looking up at him.

“What?”

“This,” I touched my stomach. “This baby is his…too.”

“What? NO! This is my baby! We made love over two months ago. The dates are right! You said you hadn’t slept with him!”

“I’m sorry I lied.”

“You’re sorry?”

“I’m sorry that I lied to you. I’m not sorry for being with him. Parker, please understand, I love him. He’s always had my heart.”

He leaned up against the wall for support. “But, we made love. He’s my son!”

I shook my head no.

“How do you know?”

“Because, when you and I…were together, I used my diaphragm.”

“You used it with me…but not him? You slept with him! How could you?”

“I’m sorry, but it’s true. I didn’t plan on sleeping with him. It just happened.”

“Where?”

“Where what?”

“Where did you sleep with him?”

“It doesn’t matter!”

“Where!” he shouted.

“At his apartment…and then again upstairs in my room.”
There was no reason to lie anymore. I was sick of living a lie. I was done.

“In my house?
You screwed him in my house?” I backed up when I saw the look of rage in his eyes.

“It wasn’t planned. I told you, I needed closure.”

“Closure? That’s what you call this betrayal? Closure?”

“I told you, I didn’t plan it. It just happened! I told him it was over, and I planned on trying to make a life with you. But, it’s not working. It’s never going to. Shannon’s his…and this is his baby, and no matter what he’s done, I’m his, too. I’m
sorry, I never meant to hurt you.”

I turned to walk away and he pulled me back. “Where do you think you’re going? You’re my wife! You can’t leave! I won’t let you go! You can get rid of that bastard child and we’ll start fresh.”

“What? You’re talking crazy.”

“No, I’m finally making sense! You’re mine! You’ll never be his again! If you even go near him again, I’ll do more than just have him arrested!”

“You did set him up, didn’t you?”

“Well, I guess if you’re willing to share, then so am I! Yeah, I set him up. One of the guys that he worked with was more than willing to help for a small fee. Stupid guy, if he’d only known I’d have paid ten times that to ruin
Ramsay.”

“You’re sick! How could you do that? Why?”

“Because, you were mine! We were meant to be together from the start!”

“I’m leaving!”

“You’re not going anywhere!” he said, grabbing my arm. “You’re sure as hell not going back to him!”

“No, I’m going to stay with my parents. I told you that. Now let go of me! You’re hurting me!”

He glared at me. “You won’t leave me! I’ll lock you up if I have to! He’ll never have you! I’ll see him dead first…I’ll see you both dead first!”

“Parker,
OUCH, you’re hurting me! Stop!” He had a death grip on my arms. He was squeezing so hard my hands were going numb. I tried to break free, but the more I tried, the harder he squeezed. “PARKER! YOU’RE HURTING ME! STOP!” I was yelling and crying now. I was scared, much more scared than the day he had me pinned to his car. The look in his eyes was terrifying.

He pushed me back against the wall and kissed me. I struggled to free myself which only increased his fury. He slapped me across the face. I knew I had to leave…run, before he hurt me or my baby. I ducked under his arm and tried to run but he caught me and threw me across the room. I landed hard on the coffee table. I cried out in pain. I curled up, trying to protect my unborn child when he came at me again, yelling that I could never leave him.

He grabbed me and pulled me to him and reached back to hit me again, but didn’t get to land the blow. My father stood behind him and had him in a choke hold.

“You hit my daughter!
You Son of a Bitch!” My father pulled his arm back to punch Parker and I screamed.

“Daddy, don’t! Please!” I didn’t want any more violence. I was afraid for my baby and I grabbed his arm, “Daddy, take me to the hospital, please!” I was starting to cramp and I was afraid bleeding would follow.

“Are you hurt?”

“The baby, I can’t lose my baby.”

He shoved Parker against the wall and said, “I’ll deal with you later!”

He walked over to me, took my hand and led me to his car. I cried and stared out the window, terrified I’d lost Shane’s baby.

“I’m sorry, Honey. I didn’t know!”

“He’s never hit me before.”

“He’ll never do it again.”

“I know. I’m leaving him, Daddy. I’m sorry, but I can’t…”

“It’s okay, Pumpkin. It’s okay.”

The rest of the ride was silent except for my father calling my mom and telling her to meet us at the hospital.

Recovery

Dr. Emory happened to be at the hospital and I was so happy to see her. A nurse put me in a room and asked, “Are you having any vaginal bleeding?”