Extol of Agnatic Dreams (The Extol Series Book 1) (22 page)

Glais was relieved to know that Evangeline would not denounce him so publicly but how long could she remain loyal after she knew the truth about him? He shivered and took a slow breath to calm his own nerves and insecurities. There was no time to think on that now. The priest leads the gathering in a short song of prayer, Glais moving his lips, and thinking the words but he could not say them. He could not be on such holy ground and speak the words of the gospel when he was not a good man. He did not even attempt to lie to himself anymore now that he was being joined by someone so pure. His soul felt dirty, and there was little he could ever do to relieve himself of that burden. There were sacrifices to be made, and this was, unfortunately, was his own curse to bear. Just as his father before him, and his father before him. And so it had been for so long that the origins were now based in soundless myth.

Glais followed along, and he was sure that Evangeline realised he wasn’t actually speaking. If she did notice, she didn’t say. Evangeline recited the lyrics along with everyone else since they were familiar to her. It had been part of her training in her youth to know the slightly changed melodies of the Braykith Kingdom. They followed the same belief, but how they honoured the Gods did differ. The Priest and his robes were only the beginning of those changes.

The service came to a close, the company turning to leave and heading towards the carriages. Teagan was whispering excitedly to Viviana, but Evangeline could not focus on that now. Glais didn’t put up a fight this time and leaving the church site was far easier than their arrival. However, he said nothing, and she did not attempt conversation this time. There was nothing to be said between them, and perhaps they could, with time, come to enjoy this silence and tension. She certainly couldn’t imagine a time where it would be gone, but ignoring Glais? Evangeline believed she could do that.

T
eagan sighed, looking over the jewels that sat on the table top. “These are beautiful.” She had said the same thing over and over as if she knew no other words and this was all she would be able to repeat until the end of time.

“Impractical.” Viviana shared her opinion although she openly admired the craftsmanship, her hand being slapped by Wick before Evangeline’s mute servant took the tiara that Viviana had been picking up. Evangeline had told Wick stories of her friends and how Viviana would occasionally borrow pieces. There would be no such thing happening here, and Wick would ensure it. These jewels had been created for Evangeline, and for her alone.

Evangeline was wearing a dress with perhaps the biggest skirt she had seen since arriving at Braykith. She had asked when she first arrived what would she wear to the more specific events, and this was her answer. She worried that the skirt would make it impossible to walk but as always the seamstress had worked miracles and the pale gold fabric was as effortless as always.

The bodice was covered in jewels that started by her bust and followed the natural arch of her body and along the sleeves of her arms. Formfitting from the waist up, and somehow entirely catered to her frame regardless of her irregular build, the dress did not seem to exaggerate her long torso but rather embrace it. Viviana and Teagan was dressed in their own dresses which were far less elaborate than Evangeline’s, however fitting for their station.

Her friends would not be confused with those who worked within the castle. Viviana wore green, a sweetheart cut for her breasts which gave shape without being vulgar. Teagan was in purple with a simple hoop neck. Both dresses were simple skirts. The fabric left to naturally fall to the ground without the help of support.

“Wick, are you coming?” Teagan seemed to have the same response to the girl as Evangeline first did. Determined to make her speak. Teagan would invite her into every conversation she could and yet still Wick gave them nothing. She did not shake her head or give a sign that she even heard the question. Evangeline was yet to hear her speak, and since learning her name Wick had given Evangeline no further communication.

“Wick will have much to do here. She prefers her own company far more than anyone else.” Evangeline couldn’t need to make excuses but she knew that Teagan needed an answer, even if that answer didn’t come from the source. She was really hoping that with time Teagan would come to the same conclusion with Wick and leave her to her silence. Evangeline still struggled, though. She had been raised to be courteous to those who served the castle. Wick would need to become an exception.

With the final touches to her attire, Evangeline lead the way to the banquet hall. She had not visited the room often. Only once or twice had she bothered and yet Evangeline found it quickly. It felt good to know that she was learning the outlay of the castle and that she rarely found that dreaded feeling of being lost that would consume her so utterly when she first arrived at Braykith.

“What is going to happen at this feast? Will Baxter be there?” Teagan asked, her voice not missing a beat as she asked after Glais’ brother. Evangeline frowned at it, although she didn’t comment she thought that maybe Teagan would distract him away from harassing Evangeline whenever it seemed to suit him. Unsure of the other girls’ intentions, Evangeline answered quickly, and trusted Viviana to control Teagan should she become too forward.

“It is simply a meal with the royal family and a few higher ranking officials from within the community. I am sure it will not be overly formal.” Evangeline was guessing, but how formal could it be at a forced meal. Again, her stomach was threatening to remove any food she attempted to swallow. She would need to find ways to deal with this anxiety, and, unfortunately, the only method she had ever found useful was exposure to the events that made her anxious.

Evangeline was comforted by her two friends being there with her, people who understood her and quite accomplished at removing her from awkward confrontation and small talk alike. It was obvious that with Teagan and Viviana by her side, she felt stronger than she did alone. Evangeline was glad they came, although she was sorry that they had been forced to abandon their blossoming lives to do it. Never did she think they would abandon her, and this proved her deepest fears that Crimah was firmly in her past and never the two should meet.

-------------------

The meal was as expected, and perhaps the biggest shock was that Teagan and Baxter did indeed seem to get along. Viviana made small talk with Kyleigh and Adeline, which left Evangeline sitting uncomfortably with Glais. He said not a word to her, and she found herself with nothing to say to start conversation. Courses were laid before them, the kitchens evidently putting in all their efforts for this meal even if it was such a small arrangement of people. In another time, Evangeline would have been impressed. Right now, she seemed to feel nothing.

This was all a farce, a lie that Evangeline was sure everyone detected but refused to admit to knowing. She was forced to sit and smile, putting on the false mask of a happy bride to be when she felt such an opposite reaction to this arrangement. While the men sat at one end of the table making vulgar jokes just out of earshot, the women fixated on the state of Evangeline’s body and how likely would it be before the babies came, Evangeline felt herself reaching for her wine glass more and more often.

At some stage, Glais did rise and excuse himself but returned shortly afterwards. Still nothing from him, a hint of his own concerns or how would they meet at a point where living together would not be completely heart wrenching seemed to be secrets he felt were worth guarding. It seemed impossible, and when he rose a second time after excusing himself from the table, Evangeline watched him. She thought she imagined it, but across the hall, the unmistakable figure of Luella could be seen just around the corner. Evangeline did not believe what she had just witnessed as she rose to follow.

The wine fuelled her poor decisions, the hall décor a blur as she pulled up the hem of her skirts to make off on a brisk run in hopes of catching the pair before they could disappear into some room. Glais seemed bottomless in his search for sexual desire and Evangeline was embarrassed to admit how arrogant Glais had been. Without a thought on her own insecurities, he brashly left his own meal to take up with some castle whore. Surely no man was so selfish as to be caught doing this on the night their engagement was announced. Infidelity was one of the causes the Priest would take as a reason not to be wed. Still Glais did this.

Evangeline preferred to think that he was too disillusioned about his own abilities to be discreet. The only other option available to her was that he just did not care if she witnessed his disappearing act with the young woman. Glais had barely spoken two words of kindness since her arrival and had refused her so publically on travelling to the church. Evangeline had been lying to herself, refusing to believe he did not care for her at all and yet here was the evidence without any merit of false allegations.

They had played together as children on occasion once or twice, and she was sure he had been adequately prepared for this just as she had been. Education on the kingdom and what to expect as a King and husband would have been part of his childhood memories just as it had been part of hers. It may have come sooner than expected but it had always been known that this day would come. Above all else, Evangeline did not believe that she had done anything to deserve this disrespect. If he thought he was discreet, then he was wrong. Did Glais really think that no one would notice if he just disappeared halfway through a formal evening? Perhaps the Braykith servants turned a blind eye on his arrogance but Evangeline could not.

She was to be his wife and this will not be a one-sided marriage. Be it for love, honour, or simply acceptance of fate Evangeline would demand to be respected as his partner. While she knew better then to believe he had been chaste Evangeline had never imagined he would dare to be so obvious about it, and she had never dreamt that there would be something still happening once she came to the castle to live. Perhaps Teagan had been right, and if she offered herself to him as a wife should he would find his release with her and her alone. The wine was working her mind in mysterious ways, and the terrible suggestion suddenly felt inspired and almost like gospel spoken from the messengers of Xado himself direct to her ear.

Had she not seen these walls countless times before, Evangeline may have been distracted. Even now, after all this time wandering the halls and learning the subtle differences, the portraits and sceneries that decorated the walls continued to be a sight to behold. At this moment, she could not enjoy the perfection of needlepoint, or the delicate splattering of layered paint on canvas as her feet took charge of her direction and followed the still warm path of Glais’ escape.

Turning down the hallway, she spotted the faintest flutter of pale blue fabric before it disappeared between the closing doors. Hurrying her steps, Evangeline closed the gap between them quickly. However, she came to a halt at the door. Some of her courage was leaving her, curiosity rising in its place. Evangeline could imagine the things he was doing to Luella now they believed they had privacy, however, the reality would be harsh to witness. The door was not properly closed, abandoned slightly ajar in their haste for each other. The door jeered at her almost like it was inviting Evangeline to spy on the lovers in their natural trance.

She approached the door carefully, dropping her dress hem on her approach and peeking into the room without moving the door. She doubted she could handle to see more than what was already being shown to her. Evangeline struggled to not disturb the joining of a woman to a man. Luella’s head was thrown to the side; Glais’ head bowed over her body with barely space enough for a breath between them. She was a picture of surrender, his hands clutching to the delicate fabric in such a way that reminded Evangeline of both pleasure and pain. She could not look away. The building would not betray her presence, concealing Evangeline entirely and absorbing her groan of disgust. She needed to make herself known or risk seeing the finale to an act she had no right to witness in the first place.

Evangeline pushed the door open, standing in the doorway and impossible to miss. The wood hit the wall with such force it bounced back just a little but not with enough force to swing shut against her. “Leave us.” The power of her voice didn’t reveal the shake in her legs and again Evangeline was mimicking the pose of her mother, although she was sure her mother never had to fear her father doing these shocking things with other women.

Neither Glais or Luella seemed happy to see her. In that instance, Evangeline did not care what Luella had to say but clearly from the way the woman stayed clinging to Glais, her hands frozen in the act of removing his coat from his shoulders, she did not take Evangeline’s demand seriously. Luella did not see a need to be discreet or apologetic and believed she would be returning to the task at hand rather quickly.

If Evangeline had not been so focused on the determination on Luella’s face, she might have noticed the cracks that appeared in Glais’ mask. He had not been expecting Evangeline to follow and indeed had never thought her brave enough to confront him like this. He had been watching her grow in personal power since her friends arrived and it seemed that inner strength and self-worth was rising at a speed he could not begin to guess at. Embarrassed to be seen with Luella, and apologetic that Evangeline would be forced to witness such a thing, Glais concentrated on keeping his face still. He did not want Evangeline to know how badly this affected him and the years of practice in concealing his lies was making good its claim now.

Luella, looked at Glais, his hands still tight on the fabric of her dress. He was frozen at that moment and had eyes only for Evangeline, who stayed standing in the doorway. Luella couldn’t believe Glais actually cared for Evangeline, and that his fear of being labelled a monster outweighed any kind of obligation he had to Evangeline. Their engagement was a joke, and Luella was waiting for Glais to dismiss her so they could resume.

“Order her to leave Glais,” Luella said finally. Her voice seemed to break the magic silence that had settled over the room. However, Glais did not do as she demanded. The shock was evident on the other women’s features as Glais stepped away from Luella and untangled her hands from his garments.

He said nothing, not trusting his voice but it was obvious that a choice was being made here and it would not end in Luella’s favour. Glais had found a new focus and at the same time, both women seemed to realise it. “Her?” Luella shouted and Evangeline thought that guards would come storming into the room from the commotion but the hallway seemed deserted. “She can’t understand you the way I do Glais.”

Glais seemed unaffected by Luella. He put his hand up to stop her, but she slapped his hand down. He did not raise it again. Evangeline had witnessed Glais being physical with Luella before but this time, he seemed unphased. She was a mere insect that bothered him enough to swat lazily at it but he did little else. When Glais refused to engage Luella found Evangeline in her sights.

Evangeline wanted to shrink back as Luella crossed the space between them. She wasn’t sure how she managed to stay standing but Evangeline suspected it was shock. Luella pointed at Evangeline, shoving her finger into Evangeline's shoulder. “He will be your end. You never should have come here.” Evangeline had never been threatened so directly before and she did not know how she was supposed to respond to it.