Fall On Me (25 page)

"Karen," she replied. The light bulb in my
brain started flashing.

Code fucking red.

She was the one who'd let Rachel into the
honeymoon suite a few months ago. The day she'd tried to seduce me.
The event that had screwed Lee's head up and mine with it. I would
never forget the look of betrayal in Lee's eyes when Rachel handed
me my wallet. I would never forget the feeling of disgust I had
when I realized she didn't trust me. It hurt then. It hurt now…

"Karen Vale?" I asked in a pissy tone. "Good
thing you're here. We need to talk." Her cheeks reddened but she
straightened her spine and nodded.

"Karen Valentine," she corrected as she met
my gaze with hard brown eyes.
Tough little cookie.
"And I
know you want to talk about, so here's my input on the matter," she
said before taking a deep breath. "I watch TV and I read the
papers. I know what happened to your wife and her friend and I'm
sorry for your troubles. But you have to know that I had absolutely
no idea that woman was a basket case when I let her upstairs. She
told me she was your girlfriend. I know I messed up, but I was new
and green to the job. I sympathize with your family, Mr. Carter, I
do. I have a family of my own who are my world. So, if you're about
to fire me because of one mistake then just get it over with. But
if you do fire me, then you should know that makes you a total
dickhead."

I was pretty fucking impressed in that
moment. I'd never heard a woman speak so many words without taking
a breath. I also liked the fact that she'd called Lee my wife. I
was mentally calculating how many words she'd spoken when she piped
up again in a much softer tone.

"I am sorry about your wife, Mr. Carter, and
I'm not saying that to save my job. Her picture was in the paper.
She was very beautiful before that woman butchered her. I can't
imagine what you must be feeling. Knowing that you used to
date…"

"Two things, sweetheart," I snapped as I
loosened my tie. "First, don't ever, and I mean ever, speculate
about the shit they write in the papers about my family. Most of it
is bullshit and any little truth has been fabricated to sell
stories. My
wife
is beautiful. Very fucking beautiful. Past,
present and future tense, got it?"

Karen nodded stiffly. "I'm sorry, Mr. Carter.
I wasn't gossiping. I just feel bad for her. But yeah, I get it.
Loud and clear." My heart hurt to think people were talking about
Lee like that. She was self-conscious enough without having that
kind of shit said about her.

"And second, I'm not firing you." I surprised
myself with that one, but a plan was forming in my head. "I'm
relocating you." This girl could be the answer to a lot of my
problems. "Or at least I'm hoping that you will accept the new job
I'm offering. It will have better pay and less stress."

"What kind of job?" She looked dubious. I
didn't blame her. This conversation had taken a U-turn. I was going
with my gut on this one though.

Walking over to my filing cabinet, I started
digging around for her résumé. "You're young, right?" I asked as I
grabbed her file and opened it.

"I'm twenty-seven," she said as she rubbed
her brow.

Bullshit. "Try again," I muttered as my eyes
trailed over her paperwork. Yeah, her employee file had her down as
twenty-seven.
Linda.
She had a soft spot for the ones with
sob stories. I wondered what this one's story was…

"I am twenty-seven," she repeated nervously.
She was no more twenty-seven than Lee was. The girl had the face of
a teenager. She was twenty at the very most. I raised my brow and
her gaze faltered. "Fine," she admitted, folding her arms across
her chest in a defensive stance. "I'm twenty-one. The blonde guy
who works downstairs in the bar told me you have an issue with
hiring young girls. Linda's fine with my age." Of course Linda was
fine about it. She loved the strays–I was her favorite mongrel. I
also had no doubt in my mind that the blonde guy she was talking
about was Mike. I was going to have to talk to that dumbass,
too.

"Yeah, he's right," I said. "I do."

During my first few months running the hotels
I'd been hit with a huge scandal involving one of my underage
employee's sexual antics with a hotel guest–a fucking senator of
all people. Mindy Simmons had put me off hiring young women for
life.

"I've only ever hired two girls under
twenty-five and both were in housekeeping," I told her. "The first
girl I hired damaged the hotel's reputation. The second one ruined
me."

"What did you do with them?" she asked
nervously. "The girls, I mean."

I smirked and leaned against my desk. "I
fired the first one." Picking up the frame on my desk I walked over
to where Karen was standing and handed it to her. Karen's fingers
hovered over the picture of the three of us. It was my favorite
photo. Derek had taken it a few minutes after Hope was born–in the
back seat of my car.

In the photo Lee was leaning against my
chest, holding Hope tightly and gazing down at her with so much
love that it was spilling from the picture. Both of us were
smiling. Lee was smiling at our daughter. I was smiling at Lee.
That was the best day of my life. I never wanted to forget it. We
had so many bad days. I kept this on my desk to always remind
myself of our best day.

"Your wife," she whispered. Her eyes flicked
up to meet mine. "You fell in love with your housekeeper."

I shook my head and looked down at Lee's
smiling face. "I fell in love with my best friend."

"That's…wow," Karen breathed.

Prying the frame from her fingers, I returned
it to its spot on my desk. "I'm going to be straight with you,
Karen," I told her. "Lee, she has some medical issues. I've been
thinking about hiring someone who could help out around the house.
Someone to keep her company when I'm not at home. Is that something
you might be interested in?"

"I'm not a nanny," she blurted out, suddenly
looking very nervous. What the hell…

"I'm not looking for a nanny," I said evenly.
I wasn't too fucking sure of the job I was offering let alone the
job title, but it definitely wasn't a nanny.

"And as you can see, I'm also not very
tactful," she added sheepishly. "I know you don't want me to bring
it up, but believe me, Mr. Carter, I am the last person you'd want
around your wife at this time."

"But you're young," I countered feeling more
sure by the second that this girl was exactly who I needed to hire.
She would be good for Lee. I could practically smell the victory.
Perfect. "If it's your safety that concerns you, I can assure you
our home is completely secure."

"It's not," she said nervously. Her cheeks
were flushed as she rubbed her forehead. "I can't do it."

"Karen," I said almost pleadingly. "I'm not
looking for a nanny or a babysitter..."

"Then what are you…"

"Jesus, will you let me finish," I sighed as
a reluctantly smile spread across my face. "You'll be good for
her–for all of them actually."

"I really don't think I can take the job, Mr.
Carter," she whispered. Shit, she looked sick. Her face was pale.
Her brow was sweating. "I have a…"

My phone started to ring causing Karen to
halt mid-sentence. Glancing down at the screen, I was anxious as
hell when I saw Derek's name appear. "I have to take this," I told
her. "Think it over for. Come see me when you've made your
decision."

"I already have," she said firmly. "The
answer is no."

"Just…just think about it, Karen," I growled
as I rushed out of my office with my phone in my hand.

"Hey, man. You okay?" I asked, answering the
moment I closed my office door. "Derek, are you all right?" I asked
again when he didn't respond.

"I'm…" His voice was slurred and I held my
phone tighter in my hand as a million different emotions coursed
through me. "I'm…lost."

"Lost?" I asked softly as I made my way down
to the lobby. "Why do you think you're lost, buddy?"

"I went for a walk," I heard him say. "But I
don't remember my way home…"

"I'm coming, bud," I told him, emotion thick
in my voice, as I stepped into the elevator and made my way down to
the underground parking lot. "I'll find you. Just…just sit tight
and wait for me, okay?"

"Yeah," he whispered. "I'm sorry, Kyle."

"You're fine," I assured him as I cranked the
engine and pulled out of the parking lot. "You're gonna be just
fine. I'm on my way."

****

Derek

I felt like a world class idiot as I sat on
the edge of a sidewalk, in a street I should know, but couldn't
remember. I was losing my mind. I couldn't remember why I walked in
this direction. I couldn't fucking remember which direction
this
direction
was. The only thing that had been on my mind when I
left the house this morning, was to get as fast and as far away
from that woman as possible.

Jesus Christ. If I wasn't so numb, I'd be
worried. I should be worried, but I couldn't feel it. I couldn't
feel anything. I looked down at my hands. They were shaking,
literally shaking violently, and if I hadn't looked down at them I
wouldn't have known.

I pinched the skin over my knuckles hard.

Nothing.

I slammed my fist against my forehead.

Nothing.

Was I in my body anymore? I felt like I had
floated out of it and was looking down at this worthless piece of
shit, curled up on the side of the road, waiting on his best friend
to come and bail him out.
Again.

My phone started to ring on the ground next
to me and it was like I had a ten second delay or something because
it took me that amount of time to register the fact that I needed
to pick it up and talk.

"Hello," I mumbled.

"Derek, sweetheart it's mom. Don't hang…" I
flinched and pressed end. I felt that. Shame. It came in abundance
when I thought of my parents. They were worried, but it wasn't
enough. It didn't change anything. Fuck.

I registered footsteps approaching a few
seconds before a tall figure slumped down on the sidewalk next to
me. His arm came around my shoulders and I shuddered.

And then I started to cry.

****

Kyle

"Come on, buddy," I said softly as I squeezed
Derek's shoulder. "Let me take you home."

"I can't go anywhere," he said in a panicked
tone as he tried to push me away. "Kyle, don't…I need to back. I'm
not leaving the hill."

"All right," I crooned as I pulled him to his
feet and led him over to the car. "I'll take you back to the hill.
I promise…just get in the car for me." It killed me to promise him
I'd take him back to the source of his pain, but I knew if I tried
to take him back anywhere else he'd run.

He slumped in the passenger seat and I
watched him from the driver's seat as he tried to fasten his
seatbelt. He couldn’t. His hands were shaking too badly.

Leaning over, I silently fastened his
seatbelt before cranking the engine and willing my own hands to
calm the fuck down. I was shredded. I was ripped clean open
watching him falling apart. "Thanks, Kyle," he whispered.

"For what, man?" I managed to squeeze
out.

"For keeping me alive."

My lungs squeezed so tight in my chest I
struggled to breathe. "Always, Derek," I whispered. "Always."

We drove in silence back to Thirteenth Street
and I spent every second of the drive plotting. I was going to have
to call his parents. He would freak, but I couldn’t do this on my
own. What if he died? Jesus, what if he fucking died? I would be
responsible. He needed help…He needed help and I couldn’t give it
to him. I wasn’t good enough for this…

Pulling into the driveway of my old house, I
braced myself for battle. "Der," I said as I opened the passenger
door for him. "I think it's time to call your folks."

"No," he growled as he stormed up the porch
steps.

Taking his keys from his hand, I unlocked the
front door and led him inside. "I'm calling them, Derek," I said in
a stern tone of voice. "I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore…" My
voice broke and I closed my eyes, inhaling slowly in a bid to calm
myself. The image of my mother's body, slumped over the steering
wheel of our car flooded my mind. I shook my head and focused on my
best friend. "I can't watch you do this to yourself." I stared
straight into his lifeless green eyes. "I will not be the one who
opens this door one morning and finds you dead. I've been there," I
whispered. "I won't sit back and wait for you to kill
yourself."

****

Derek

"I'm not going to kill myself, Kyle," I said
quietly as I stepped past him and went into the kitchen. "I
wouldn’t do that."

He followed me into the kitchen and grabbed
my shoulder, swinging me around to face him. "Are you sure about
that?" he demanded and I could hear the anguish in his voice. His
blue eyes were glassy and I knew I was hurting him. "You've been
doing a fucking fantastic job at proving me right so far," he
hissed as he ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
"Drinking yourself unconscious. Whoring your body to every piece of
skirt who looks twice at you…"

"You're calling me a whore?" I roared,
shoving him in the chest hard. He didn’t even stagger so I shoved
him again. "You're one to talk, Kyle. Just because you've turned
into Brad fucking Pitt now, doesn’t mean I don't remember your life
pre-Angie."

"Brad Pitt?" Kyle shook his head as stepped
away around me. "Pre-Angie? What the fuck are you talking about,
dumbass?"

"You're a family man now," I snapped as I
moved to the kettle and flicked it on. "And I'm happy for you. I
am. But don't you dare criticize me for doing the very things you
used to do before you met Lee." Shaking my head in disgust, I
leaned against the kitchen counter and stared out the window. "I've
supported you through thick and thin, Kyle," I growled. "When Frank
died. When you had the car accident with Rachel. When your girl
lost her baby…When you needed help with Hope…Everything. I've had
your back through
everything
. Don't even think about selling
me out to my parents now."