Fallout (53 page)

TRAINS LIKE THIS

Generally wreck sooner or later.

So far so good, though.

Grandfather has not missed

the short pours of whiskey

I’ve indulged in lately. They say

liquor is quicker, and whiskey

is definitely quicker than champagne

when it comes to a good buzz.

A shot or two, nothing scares me,

nothing hurts me. I like how that feels.

The weird thing is, Grandfather’s

own drinking has waned. It’s as if

the wedding planning has reduced

his stress. I don’t understand why.

I do know I’ll have to find a way

to replace what I’ve taken from

the liquor cabinet before he swings

the other way again. Bound to happen

after tomorrow. Once the wedding

is over. The reception done,

and Aunt Cora and Liam go off

on their honeymoon, return

to their new house in Austin.

They decided to live there, near

his family instead of hers (mine), go

into business together. Massaging

the uptight of Austin. That thought

is good for another swallow. Hot

liquid amber down my throat. Better.

Almost good enough to deal

with lingerie shopping. Aunt Cora

should be here to pick me up

any time. Okay, just a quick nip and

then I’d better use some mouthwash.

The worst thing about whiskey

is the smell it leaves behind.

LISTERINE ROCKS

Aunt Cora doesn’t notice a thing

on the drive to the mall. I close

my eyes, lean back into the seat,

absorbing radio music and traffic

music and the music of Aunt Cora’s

voice. Something about
dresses.

Something about
the hotel where

you get to stay tonight.
Something

about
pick you up at eleven sharp.

And something that really grabs

my attention.
So, okay. Are we going

to meet your Bryce tomorrow?

Just the name makes me smile.

“Last time we talked, he promised

he’d be there. On time, even.”

She laughs.
You didn’t give him

a hard time, did you? I mean about

being punctual. No wedding starts

exactly when it’s supposed to.

There’s always some sort of delay.

Don’t know why that is, but it is.

“If you say so.” Not like I’d have

a clue. “I’ve never been to a wedding.”

Not like she doesn’t know that.

“Yours will be my first.” And hopefully

not my last. I want one of my own

before too very long. The amazing

thing is Bryce hasn’t even asked

about protection. Maybe he wants

me to get pregnant too.

“Are you going to have a baby?”

Her smile drops away. “I don’t

mean right now. But ever?”

She looks like she has something

she wants to tell me. But the mall

has suddenly reached our line

of sight. She perks up and says,

Who knows what the future might

bring? Let’s start with underwear.

UNDERWEAR SHOPPING

Is likewise something I’ve never

done. Well, I mean Wal-Mart undie

shopping is one thing. Upscale

bras and panties is all new.

And radical. There are even

salesladies who are trained to

fit you right, and tell you what kind

of bra will flatter you best. It’s kind

of embarrassing. If it wasn’t for

the whiskey, I’d be freaking out.

Only problem is, now that it’s

wearing off some, I’m getting

a headache. Hope it doesn’t

get worse. Anyway, Aunt Cora

and I take our fancy understuff

up to the counter. In her pile:

three stretch lace thongs, two gel

underwires, and a teeny purple teddy,

for the honeymoon.
In my pile: red

velvet panties, matching push-up bra.

BOY, DOES THAT ADD UP

Almost one hundred fifty big

ones! “Uh, are you sure you can

afford that? I can wear my old—”

Aunt Cora stops me.
This day

is only going to happen once.

Besides …
She reaches into

her wallet, fishes out a shiny new

credit card.
Liam’s mom gave me

this. Said to get anything my little

heart desired. She knows Daddy

doesn’t have a bottomless bank

account. I guess she does.

I think back to Thanksgiving and

the Cregan place. Big house.

Nice furniture. Pretty backyard.

Pricey (if unremarkable) neighborhood,

the same one where Aunt Cora

and Liam will live, thanks to a big

down payment wedding gift.

Aunt Cora will be well cared for.

Do I feel good about that?

THE QUESTION NAGS

The rest of the afternoon.

Through manicure.

Pedicure.

(And just who wants a job

dealing with scaly feet?)

Trousseau shopping.

Christmas shopping.

(And why does Aunt Cora

think Liam wants pj’s?)

Makeup shopping.

Window shopping.

(And by now I’m getting

totally sick of shopping.)

Stuffing the car with

packages. Gassing up.

(And I majorly wish I had

an ibuprofen in my purse.)

Driving the eighty

miles to Austin.

(And now the nagging

question really gets loud.)

Am I happy that Liam will

care well for Aunt Cora?

(And will she be happy when

Bryce is taking care of me?)