Fast Connection (Cyberlove #2) (17 page)

“I haven’t fooled around with anyone else in ages. Since I’ve got back, it’s only been you.” He wet his lips, eyes ablaze with passion. “Unless you got a Saturday night to my Friday, and you’re not as careful as you claimed to be.”

“Haven’t touched anyone since I first had my hands on you.”

Dominic let his head fall back and gripped the undersides of his knees as I teased the head of my dick against his ass. Doing it without lube wasn’t my usual thing, but he didn’t want to stop and I didn’t either. So I slicked us up as best I could and slid in nice and slow, letting him feel every inch, and nearly lost it at the squeeze of his muscles around me—much tighter than usual. He was gritting his teeth and sweating, clearly uncomfortable, but he only pulled his knees tighter to his chest.

“Let me feel you,” he said again, lower and hoarser. “God, I’ve been fucking dreaming of this.”

At that, I thrust forward, burying myself to the hilt and moving us across the floor a couple of inches. It wasn’t pretty and it wasn’t skilled, but after a couple of slow rocks back and forth, I ignored the hardwood floor beneath my knees, focusing only on Dominic’s body, so pliant and willing and perfect beneath me.

When he began to jack himself, I knew he was close. My hips stuttered and with a moan, I came.

“Fuck yes,” he whispered when his release coated us, hot and sticky.

I pulled out, breathing hard, and only came to my senses when his eyes abruptly cleared and slanted away.

Shit.

I’d done this. He’d shown up at my house eager to go on a date with another man, and I’d taken him raw at the front door. What was wrong with me?

I didn’t move as we lay in my hallway, clutching each other, but Dominic’s body eventually stiffened and he rolled out from beneath me. Instead of his usual smirk, his face was drawn tight. He pulled on his bunker pants, while I rose to my feet on protesting knees.

“Dom—”

“This is a new low, even for me. Now I’m gonna go out with some guy after you just unloaded in me.” He shook his head and shot me a sharp look. “You know I can’t resist you, and you couldn’t let me have this night. Oh no. Not that it was going to be special or anything, because this guy seems like a typical scumbag—”

Possessiveness ignited in my blood as I clamped a hand on his shoulder. “You’re not going.”

Dominic stiffened. “And why’s that?”

Beyond my family, the last thing I’d cared about was serving, and that had been ripped away from me. I’d spent my entire life working hard not to care about anything or anyone but my kids, Nadia, and my business, but it wasn’t working for me anymore. Not when these feelings for Dominic wouldn’t quit. Not when I was miserable without him.

I inhaled sharply. “You’re not going out with another guy. He’s not fucking you, he’s not touching you, and he’s definitely not getting a chance to see you in this.”

His eyes were nearly bugged out of his head. “Luke—”

“He’s probably some punkass who gets his sex tips from porn and fucks like a diseased jackrabbit. He’ll never notice how much you like to be held after sex and he certainly won’t bring you sandwiches!”

I was yelling now, right in Dominic’s face, and he wasn’t even flinching. In fact, he wasn’t moving.

“I—” Damn, why was this so hard to say? Because I knew,
I knew,
that I was the man for him. It was me who knew what he liked and wanted and who stayed up chatting with him late into the night when I should have been sleeping. Me who looked forward to his morning rants about customers and his silly memes and bad jokes. I was the one who could encourage him to fight for his future and stand up to his father. Not some other asshole. “I want you. To be mine. Only mine. And… I’ll only be yours. I can’t do this anymore. Pretending like I don’t care, that I don’t want you all the time, that I can’t get you out of my head. That this took a hard left from just six weeks ago, and I’ve been lying to myself that it hadn’t.” I clenched my hands into fists. “I don’t give a fuck if you text him it’s off or just stand him up, because you’re not going.”

He finally blinked. Once. Twice. Then he came alive with a two-handed shove. I stumbled back a couple of steps before catching myself, then braced for his onslaught. It came in true Dominic fashion.

“Are you kidding me right now? I gave you so many outs. Yesterday, today. So many damn chances to say, ‘Hey Dominic, on second thought, how about you not go mess around with other dudes?’”

I frowned at his impression of me. “My voice doesn’t sound like that.”

“And you wait until the wire, when I’m all dressed up and spent a whole day finding these heavy-as-hell bunker pants, to tell me that you don’t want me to go?”

I was an asshole. All I did was nod.

He gestured at the door as if the guy was on the other side of it. “I didn’t want to go on this date. He called me a twink and said he couldn’t wait to fuck my boy pussy. I wasn’t chomping at the bit to hang out with this guy. Like, if all I wanted was to get nailed fast and dirty, I’d have been hooking up with other people all the damn time.”

My stomach rolled at the idea of someone using him as their fuck toy. “Jesus Christ, Dominic. Please don’t—”

He gave a derisive snort. “But now Luke Rawlings has finally decided he doesn’t want anyone else touching me so—”

“It’s not just about that, and you know it.”

“Oh yeah?”

“It’s not just about him touching you. It’s about him being in your presence. Thinking he has a shot at you. When we both know you’re better than him.”

“How do you know?” he challenged. “You don’t know him.”

“I know because there’s no one in this fucking borough good enough for you. Except for me.” I wasn’t trying to be cocky. I was stating fact. It’d taken me a while but that switch in my brain and my heart had finally flipped. “And unless I’m reading you wrong, you want to be with me too.” When he didn’t say anything, I soldiered on. “Unless you don’t want to, then I guess I have a lot of convincing to do.”

He was still wary. I could tell by the way he held his body away from me, chin up. “You’re just saying all this because you couldn’t stand the thought of me with some other guy.”

“Sure, I’m jealous as fuck, but that’s just the catalyst making me own up to how I feel. Who cares how I figured this all out? All that matters is that I did. When the jealousy burns off, the feelings are still there. They were there weeks ago, if I think about it. They’re here now. They’ll be there tomorrow.”

“Yeah?” He was losing his defensive edge. “And for how long? You can’t lay this shit on me so I let myself get attached and then cut the strings like you did last time.”

“All I can promise is that if this goes bad, it’ll go bad because of both of us. Not just me.” His expression softened, his gaze flickering over my face. “Stay,” I said. “We’ll go out to dinner.”

“Out?”

“Out.”

“Like in public?”

“Yes!” I said, voice rising again. “I’m done treating you like any other hookup.”

The words caused his breath to ease out slowly. His entire body relaxed. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to say that, Luke. No idea how much I wanted you to stop me. To show you gave a damn about me. Other than my sister, you’re the only real friend I got.”

He looked kind of pathetic, but then I probably did too, after spilling my guts to him. “Yeah, well. You’re mine too.” I replayed some of our previous conversation and gripped his hip. “And, wait a sec. You didn’t hook up with anyone else at all since leaving the army?”

“Yeah, about that…” Dominic shrugged. “I fooled around with my friend Garrett while I was on the base, but you’re the first and only dude who has ever fucked me, if you know what I mean. And I haven’t been with a woman for over a year. So it’s just been you. Not that it’s a big deal.”

Judging by the redness creeping over his chest, that wasn’t entirely true. But it was clear he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I grabbed the back of his head and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Why don’t you get cleaned up, change, and we’ll get some dinner? Need to feed you.”

Dominic’s smile was everything. “I could totally mow down a burger.”

I shoved him toward my bathroom. “Deal.”

Dominic

The next morning, I woke up in Luke’s bed, and he didn’t kick me out. If being excited over that milestone was pathetic, he made it better by kissing me fully awake. His lips moved over my stubbled jaw, the muscles in my throat, and finally latched onto my Adam’s apple.

“I could get used to this,” I said hoarsely.

“Mmm.” Luke looked up at me through his hair. “You should.”

I spread my thighs so his strong body settled on mine.

“Is this our new Saturday?”

His teeth scraped along my skin. “Fuck yes.”

Tingles spread through my body that had nothing to do with lust. Well, not everything to do with lust.

“Is it safe for me to tell you that I really like you?”

“Yes,” Luke said against my throat. “I think you can tell I like you. And I’m sorry for last night. I should have told you how I felt before it got that far.” His lips turned up. “But I’ll make it up to you?”

I bet he would. I closed my eyes as he gently rocked against me. My throat worked as he continued to explore my chest with his tongue. He’d done this before, but there had always been a guarded quality to his touch. I’d always felt like if I moved the wrong way or said the wrong thing, he’d jerk away. But now things were in sync. My body was his to touch and his was mine to caress.

For the first time since meeting him on that app, I completely gave in to my tactile nature. If anyone knew anything about Dominic Costigan, it was that I’m a physical guy. I loved to touch, to get close, and to have someone wrapped around me. Which meant this was perfect. Him tonguing my nipple while I sifted my hands through his hair was the most content I’d been in a while.

“This is so weird.”

“Mmm?”

“Just…” I searched for the words to articulate what I wanted to say, and failed. “I dunno. I’ve had relationships before, right? But I was always too much for whoever I was dating. Like it felt doomed from the start. Either we were too much alike or I was too immature.”

Luke stopped groping me long enough to smirk. “You don’t say?”

I bucked my hips against his. “For real, though. Maybe it was because when I was younger all I cared about was partying? And then when I got older, I knew I’d be deployed every now and again so I didn’t really feel the need to start up a relationship.”

“When’s the last time you felt that need?”

“Shit. I dunno. Three years ago? We broke up right before I shipped out, and we’d only been sort of dating. Not serious.” My fingers tightened in his hair. “But now I want to be serious. Which is what’s weird. When I got out of the service, I knew I wanted to try being with a guy in terms of sex… but I also wasn’t so gung ho about the idea of constant one-night stands and shit. But in the past I wasn’t boyfriend material, so I figured no one would ever be serious about me.”

Luke’s tongue painted patterns down my torso. “Well, I am.”

I almost asked why, but bit back on the question. It was a testament to my own insecurity, which had tripled after the conversation with Adriana, that I was doubting the guy after his speech the night before. Luke was the last person who would blow smoke up my ass, but… part of me still couldn’t believe it.

That part blanked out once he took my dick down his throat and proceeded to play with me for the next hour. Swear to God, I’d never experienced such mind-melting foreplay. Tantric dick-sucking while he fingered my ass. By the time he was done with me, I shot off everywhere and could barely handle the sensation of him sliding inside of me.

Unsurprisingly, I fell asleep after we finished. More surprisingly, he woke me up to a homemade breakfast. French toast. I was on cloud friggin’ nine.

“When are we seeing each other again?” I asked on my way to the door.

“Soon?” Luke leaned against the bannister, arms crossed over his chest. “Now that we’re a couple, I got to tell the kids about you.”

My eyes widened. “Whoa. Really?”

“Yes. Really. If we’re doing this, then it’s going to be hard to hide you from them, and they know who you are. So I don’t want to lie.”

“But I’d need to tell Adriana first and I’m… not sure how she’d take it.”

“Does she not know you’re bisexual?”

“She does but…” I played out all the possible outcomes in my head, and too many of them pointed in a negative direction. “Your kids mean a lot to her. She doesn’t have very many friends. I dunno how she’d react to me doing their dad. I’m worried she’d be angry about being misled for the past month, and that she won’t trust me anymore.”

Luke frowned. “That’s why I want to
not
lie to my kids.”

“I know, but it’s not that easy for me. Look, she and I are allies right now. We need each other, and Micah and Michelle would definitely tell her. I want to do it first. And I want to figure out a good way
to
do it. Even if she inevitably gets pissed the fuck off and shuts me out, I wanna wait until a moment when everything else in the house is calm.”

I could tell just by looking at him that Luke wasn’t fully grasping the gravity of the situation, but he didn’t have a dysfunctional family like we did. There were times when not walking on eggshells in the Costigan household could quickly result in an absolute explosion, tears, and most of us wishing we’d been born to another family or not at all. It was a misery, but… I couldn’t bring myself to make it that plain to him.

“Just give me some time, okay? Please.”

With a reluctant nod, Luke pulled me into another of his bruising kisses and watched me leave. His eyes were on me the entire way back to Forest Avenue. It was the first time the door hadn’t shut in my face.

Luke

Watching Dominic stretch before our run, his biceps flexing as he reached his arms over his head, was almost enough to make me call off this whole thing and take him home.

“Quit looking at me like that.” Dominic grinned.