Few Things Left Unsaid (22 page)

This is unreal. I cannot believe this. I wanted to pinch myself to see whether it was a bad dream or something like that. But I was facing the toughest moment. My girlfriend holding some other guy on his bike while going for a long drive. What was worse than this? There was. The worst part was that bloody guy was my friend. I could not hear this. This was the blackest day in my life. How could Riya do this? How could Amit allow Riya to do this? Each thought killed me from inside.

As we reached Grant lane I said…

“Where are we going Amit? It’s late.”

“I wanted to tell you something about Neha. Let’s go to that garden. We will leave in half an hour. Is it fine?” he asked me.

“Ok fine. No problem. But we will leave early. Otherwise Aditya will shout at me.”

We reached the garden. It was already dark. We sat on the bench in a corner. He bought ice cream for me. As we were having ice cream, he said…

“Riya, I am not happy. I am not getting what I want. I am giving my best still my expectations are not fulfilled.” Amit almost cried.

“What happened? Any problem? I did not get you. Any conflicts with Neha?” I asked him.

“Yes. She does not give any respect to me. I wait for her bunking my college and she doesn’t care. She gives me excuses. I call her in the break when she is with her friends. We have never shared a relationship, which you look for in a lifetime. I really admire your relationship with Aditya.” He said

“What admire? Can’t you see how Aditya is behaving with me? All charm in our relationship has gone.” Tears rolled down my eyes.

“I always wanted a girl who would care for me, who would look after my small needs, who will understand my feelings who would love me more than anyone in this world. When I will be with her, I will forget what is going around me. When she will hold my hand, I would feel like I have achieved everything in life. When I will  kiss her, I would feel she was the only one I wanted. I wanted a girl like this.” Amit said.

I was having ice cream and he continued saying….

“I really don’t see any quality in Neha. She is a very different kind of girl. Her priorities are different. Her life is different. I wanted a girl who would be with me for a lifetimeWho would  give me priority. During school days, I thought Neha would be the girl who could do all these things. However, I was wrong. She didn’t. Today I think I took a wrong decision.”

I was looking at him…. He continued.

“The day I saw you I liked you. You were a changed girl. Any one could fall for you at the first sight. But I ignored you. I loved Neha. But day by day, we came closer. We started talking during nights for hours. I really felt you were the girl whom I could trust; I didn’t know why Riya? I don’t know what’s happening. I should not do this. I should ignore this temptation. I should keep my self calm. I should stop my heart from doing this. But I really could not.  If you don’t like this please stop, me and I would not repeat it. I promise. Nevertheless, for now I want you. I want to feel you. I want to feel what was in you that was forcing me to do what I amgoing to do. I want to feel your lips.” Amit stared at me.

OH GOSH! THIS WAS EXTREME. IF HE WAS IN FRONT OF ME I WOULD HAVE BEEN IN JAIL FOR A MURDER CASE. HOW COULD MY FRIEND THINK LIKE THIS? HE NEVER GAVE A THOUGHT ON OUR FRIENDSHIP. OUR FRIENDSHIP MEANT NOTHING. THIS GIRL WHOM HE WANTS TO KISS MEANS NOTHING TO ME. MY FEELINGS, MY LOVE, MEANS NOTHING TO HIM. I HEARD PEOPLE CHANGE. HOWEVER, TO THIS EXTREME I NEVER THOUGHT. WHY DID GOD MAKE MY Riya SO SWEET THAT SHE COULD FALL IN A TRAP SO EASILY? RIYA WAKE UP.OPEN YOUR EYES. THIS GUY IS FOOLING YOU. HE JUST WANTS PHYSICAL RELATIONSHIP. PLEASE JAAN.WAKE UP BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE. I WOULD HAVE TOLD HER ALL THIS BUT I NEVER KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING BEHIND ME.

I was shocked to hear this from him. I wondered why he was saying this. I thought hard as he was saying all this. Before I could react, he came closer and touched my lips. Before I could tell him that it was wrong, he felt my lips. Before I could tell him that I was committed to you he I felt his saliva in my mouth. Before I could tell him we are wrong, he kissed me passionately. Before I could feel anything about you, he closed my eyes. Before I could stop my self, he was so much into me that I could not stop him. Rather I could not stop my self from kissing him. I still don’t know it was right or wrong. But I can still feel that moment. The way he looked in my eyes. I saw the same love that was in your eyes. Before I could resist, he went on kissing me….

I would like to say Just one one word. I am no longer alive. I am dead. I am broken. I am shattered into pieces. Riya kissed. Who? My good friend….  My friend Amit kissed. who? My sweetheart. My Riya…. What was I doing? I was bloody listening to whatever happened. Did she enjoy it?

I stopped him finally. We did not speak a word. Both of us had tears in our eyes. Both of us cried. We again came closer. We kissed again. We hugged. It was all because of frustration. It was all because of depression. I never wanted this to happen. I wanted you. I wanted my Aditya. MY MR PERFECT. However, destiny had something else in store for me.

Now what’s the use saying she never wanted this to happen. It had happened. It was reality. Not a dream. Not a nightmare. She had kissed. She had kissed my friend in the same garden where we had spent my birthday.

 She would not have remembered anything. Did I mean nothing to her?

We returned. We didn’t speak a single word. He left me near my house. I went home. I slept on my bed. The bed sheet became all wet. I could not control my tears. The first time in the last few days I did not know why these tears were coming out. In the last few days, I had cried for you. But today I was confused. Was it for you who betrayed me or was it because of Amit who had made me smile…?

I still did not know why the tears came. But I loved you. I loved you like crazy and you can’t deny that fact. The entire college knew this.

He was wrong, very wrong. I was disappointed with him. He should not have taken advantage of my girl friend. He should not have crossed the line. It was impossible to forgive him; I would not be able to forget it... …

If the heart was the most important organ, then why did it break so easily. I would still forgive her. But Amit had made so much impact on her that she just ignored my love. She had forgotten everything
.

Pyaar mein ashk bahate kyu hai…

Do dil ek dusre ko tadpaate kyu hai…

Kehte hai pyaar zindagi hai…

Toh phir pyaar ko khel banate kyu hai…..

        
  Those 5 days  by Riya. Her own words

                                                    
    I
was guilty. I wanted to tell you whatever had happened. I wanted to confess in front of you that I had kissed Amit. I never wanted to go away from you. If I had told you about the kiss, the distance between us would have increased. I didn’t want to lose you.Your 1 decision changed our lives.

I decided not to go anywhere. It would have increased his feelings towards me. I did not want to hurt Neha. She was my only good friend in college. I decided not to talk to him often. Even if he was the one who made me smile I avoided him.

I could not forget our first kiss. I could not forget the feel of it. Why did you take the decision of going away from me? One decision of yours changed everything jaan. I never wanted this to happen. I wanted to marry you. But you changed everything.

Amit called me the next day. He wanted to meet me.

He said “Please forget whatever happened yesterday. I know you love Aadi. I know you can never be mine. But can we meet as friends? I want to see you.”

“No Amit. I can’t. After whatever happened yesterday I can’t meet you. I don’t want to encourage you and be the reason of your break up with Neha. Please. I am sorry.” I kept the phone down.

I was confused. Why did I refuse to meet him? I should say I didn’t want to encourage myself. I was really frustrated and  wanted to leave all the things behind. I wanted to forget you… But I thought it was bringing me closer to Amit.

That night you called me. I was overwhelmed when I heard your voice.I was in tears. I could not stop them. You sang our favorite song. Tujhe dekh dekh sona…..

It made me cry even more. I could not say anything. I realized then you were my true love. I realized no one could replace you. I loved you jaan.I loved you a lot. I was excited to feel you again and talk to you the next morning in class. I thought we could spend entire day together.But you were leaving for Ratnagiri.I was upset after hearing this. I went home. I was checking my mailbox. God know what came to my mind I checked your mailbox too. I saw a mail in your draft. A girl named Muskaan  had mailed you…

It was…

Hi sweetie. I am missing you. I enjoyed every moment with you. You can make any girl high to extreme. Your body looks so hot when you are wet. I love you. I love your back. I can never forget that we had a bath together. My bed is missing you. I want you right now on my bed.Please come back to my home. I am waiting.

16th September.

I could not believe what I was looking at. You had never told me about Muskaan. You slept with her. You had a bath with her. My blood pressure became low. Doctors told me to rest. I was shattered. I wanted someone with whom I could share all these things. But there was no one. I was all alone. I could have accepted you with all these things if you had told me. But you didn’t. You lied to me. You had told me once that you had not been physical with any girl. You lied. I could never trust you. Thing were getting worse. I loved you a lot. I was always so frank with you. Still you lied to me. It was a shock for me. I called Swapnil to ask him who Muskaan was. He told me everything about her. He told me every small thing he knew about you and Muskaan.

“Muskaan was Adityta’s girlfriend. They were very close to each other.They had shared a physical relationship. She was from Delhi. She was his friend’s friend. I had asked him to tell you everything. But he didn’t. Don’t worry now, he is committed to you. He doesn’t even speak to any girl now. He really loves you a lot.”

I could not forget whatever I had seen. Muskaan was your girlfriend.But you given me a different name. You had a few girlfriends. You kept on lying. This was the cheapest mail I had ever seen. You are the cheapest guy too. You broke all the promises you had made to me.

Each promise was broken

1. We will always be together… You left me alone.

2. We will never fight…. You broke up with me.

3. Our love will never fade…. You cheated on me.

4. Trust…. I can’t trust you anymore.

5. Respect for each other…. You never understood my feelings.

6. Forget each other’s past….. Now I understand why this promise was taken.

7.Good education… I never cared about it when I was with you.

You broke all promises jaan. You broke my life into pieces.Some things happen even if we don’t want them to. And we have to accept them. Even I had to accept that you had changed. You were not my

Aadi. You had changed a lot. You had made your own world. I was depressed. I wanted someone with whom I could share all these things. I could not control myself. I called Amit. I told him everything that I had seen. He asked me to meet him in Aerol. I went to meet him.

“Riya, please don’t cry. You can’t change the things that have already happened. Please stop crying.” He also wept.

“I never thought Aadi would behave like this. He never told me he had slept with someone. I could have accepted him if he had told me. But he didn’t. I am hurt. I can’t trust him anymore.” I told him.He made me smile in those tough moments also. I was getting attracted towards him. He tried to kiss me. But I didn’t allow him. I was depressed. I wanted to be alone.This was the reason I didn’t answer you when you left for Ratnagiri.I wanted to go away from you. I could never trust you.I called you so many times.But your phone was out of coverage area.You must have kept it purposely.