Fighting for the Edge (11 page)

She stood with her gift bag. “Yeah, I’m beat.” The holiday had been a non-factor during lessons that morning. Peter and Natalia hadn’t shown any lenience, working Nick and her as hard as any day of the year.

She and Chris made the rounds, bidding everyone goodnight and thanking Aunt Debbie and Uncle Joe once more for including them. The night had grown even colder, and they walked briskly to the apartment with Aubrey holding onto Chris again for security. They were just inside their front door when her phone blared with “Mamma Mia.”

“Hi, Mom,” she answered while shrugging out of her coat.

“How was your dinner?”

“It was fun.”

Chris turned on the TV and pointed at
A Christmas Story
playing on the screen. Little Ralphie was being booted down the slide by Santa Claus.

“It has begun,” Chris whispered.

She smiled and sat on the slippery leather couch, kicking off her heels. In the background of the phone line, she heard her dad and her smile faded. He was obviously too busy to get on the line and talk to his daughter on Christmas.

“I really wish you would’ve come home, even if it was only for a few hours,” her mom said. “It’s not the same without you here.”

Aubrey rested her head on her hand. “It was just easier to stay here. There’s a lot going on.”

“You hardly ever come home anymore, and you know how much I miss you.”

The sadness in her mom’s voice pierced her heart, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Maybe she should’ve sucked it up and gone to visit her family. Her mom wasn’t the main reason she wanted to stay away. But she did tolerate her dad’s crap, and that made her partly responsible for the mess that was their marriage. A mess Aubrey couldn’t stand to be around.

“It’s just hard…” Aubrey’s voice croaked with tears. Ugh, she hated crying. She’d done enough of it all those Christmases ago when she’d discovered her seemingly perfect family life was a lie.

She looked up and caught Chris watching her with concern, and she dipped her head. He set the remote control on the coffee table and went into the kitchen.

Her mom sniffled. “So, I guess we won’t see you until nationals?”

“Probably not. We have a lot of work to do the next two weeks.”

“Well, call me and let me know how you’re doing.”

Aubrey cleared her throat. “I will.”

“I hope you have a good day tomorrow. Don’t work too hard.”

Guilt swam in her stomach, knowing she’d be doing a lot more playing than working. “I’ll talk to you soon,” she said and ended the call.

She leaned back and closed her eyes again, taking slow breaths. She wasn’t going to let her mom make her feel guilty for keeping her distance. It made her too angry to go home and see how unhappy her parents were with each other but refusing to change their situation.

“Are you okay?” Chris’s voice sprung open her eyes.

He’d loosened his tie and opened the top button of his shirt. In one hand he held a bottle of beer. He joined her on the couch, and she sat up straighter.

“Yeah.” She nodded quickly. “Just my mom… you know, she wishes I was there and all.”

He continued to watch her with the little bend of concern between his eyebrows. “I feel like there’s more to the issues with your family than you’ve said. Just seeing how upset you looked when you were talking to your mom.”

She stared at her phone, wiping the tiniest specks of dust from its screen. She hadn’t told anyone what had happened. Not even Em. It had made her so sad and angry that she’d just wanted to bury it.

“If you wanna talk about it…” Chris paused. “I just want you to know I’d be glad to listen.”

She looked into his eyes. There was something in them that gave her a feeling of total trust. She did want to talk, to finally let it all out. So she put the phone aside and began.

“When I was in high school, I used to help out at my dad’s office after school sometimes. I thought it was cool to see all the building plans and to watch neighborhoods and shopping centers created from scratch, and it was fun because I got to see my dad more since he was always at work.”

She shifted on the sofa so she was angled more toward Chris. “The Christmas I was sixteen, I found a black velvet box and a card in my dad’s desk. Inside the box was the most gorgeous diamond bracelet I’d ever seen. I knew I shouldn’t, but I opened the card, and my dad had written this really romantic note, mushier than anything I’d ever heard him say to my mom. And I thought, that’s so awesome he’s giving her this amazing gift and telling her all these wonderful things. She’s going to absolutely love it.”

“Well, Christmas morning came, and I watched excitedly as my mom opened her gift bag. But the velvet box wasn’t in there. It was a gift card to a spa, and there was no card either. And stupid me thought my dad might be waiting to give her the bracelet when they were alone. But the day ended and it never happened.”

Chris put his beer on the table and spread his arm across the back of the sofa, bridging the space between Aubrey and himself. He remained quiet, and she continued, “Two days later I went to my dad’s office to work, and I saw the bracelet. On the arm of his twenty-six year old secretary.” She let out a bitter laugh. “How cliché can you get – the boss getting it on with his secretary. I couldn’t believe it. I think I was in denial at first, and then I was ready to run to my mom and tell her everything. But I couldn’t do it. I have no problem speaking my mind to anyone, but every time I tried to tell her, I just couldn’t find the words.”

“I don’t know if I could’ve done it either,” Chris said.

“After a while I started to suspect she might know, and she just chose not to do anything about it. I think she’s settled with her comfortable life and being the wife of an important businessman in the community and all the social crap that comes with it, and she doesn’t wanna give that up. And my dad has his comfortable life with a wife who does everything for him. It makes me so mad because they’re so clearly unhappy together, but they just continue to pretend to everyone on the outside that their marriage is wonderful.”

“Do you think your dad is still cheating on her?”

“We went to Hawaii a few years ago, which I thought was my dad’s attempt to put family first, but I was sorely mistaken. He either played golf or worked on his computer the whole time, and I heard him on the phone late one night talking to someone.” She shook her head in disgust. “And it wasn’t a business associate.”

Chris sighed hard. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t think he’ll ever change,” she said.

“I see now why Christmas brings up bad memories.”

She ran her thumb along the hem of her dress. “It was such a long time ago, but I’ll never forget what he said in that card. It made me sick to think of him with that woman, telling her those things he should only be saying to my mom. I think about it every time I see him at Christmas and he gives my mom some other meaningless gift that he put no thought into whatsoever.”

“That really sucks,” Chris said.

She pushed her fingers through her hair, tugging it away from her face. “That’s a great way to sum up the situation.”

They sat in silence for a few moments until Chris said, “Maybe this year will be the start of only wonderful Christmas memories.”

She couldn’t help but smile a little. “You think you’re that good, huh?”

“Oh, I know I’m that good. We’ll have so much fun tomorrow that from now on, it’ll be all you can remember.” He tapped her shoulder.

Her smile widened because she believed that could actually happen. She felt better just from talking to Chris, and she’d always thought talking about it would dredge up the hurt and make her feel worse.

“Baby steps,” she said. “We have many years of yucky Christmases to erase.”

“I’m all over it,” he said with confidence. “It shall be done.”

Aubrey slowly stood and curled her toes into the thick carpet. “I’m gonna get some sleep then. To prepare for this epic day tomorrow.”

Chris stood as well and stuck his hands in his pockets. He looked down at her with a thoughtful gaze. “I know I joke around a lot, but… you really shouldn’t have to think about all that junk with your dad. I just wanna see you happy.”

A surge of emotion swelled in her chest, and before she knew it she was hugging him. He took a moment to react and then circled his arms around her waist, enclosing her in his warm embrace. She bit her lip to stop the tears, but inside she was still a jumble of emotion. Being in Chris’s arms felt so comforting but also so exhilarating. Way more exhilarating than any hug between friends should feel.

She backed away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get all needy.”

“It’s okay.” His eyes shined with a smile. “I have plenty of hugs to spare.”

I’d better get out of here before I do something else impulsive.

“Well, have a good night.” She picked up her shoes and her phone and walked toward the stairs. “Wake me if you hear Santa.”

Chris slapped his hands together. “There’s the Christmas spirit!”

Chapter Nine

I aimed my digital camera at Liza and snapped as she tore into her final present of the morning. Opened boxes of clothes and games surrounded her on our living room carpet. She squealed upon revealing the set of paperback mysteries, and I clicked the camera again. She looked too cute in her pink snowflake pajamas and big fuzzy slippers.

Sergei took a small box from under the tree and slid it in front of me. “Em, there’s one more for you.”

He’d already given me a number of gifts, so I wasn’t expecting more. I crawled over to the tree and picked up another small box.

“There’s one more for you, too.” I smiled and handed it to him.

“Open yours first,” he said.

I put down my camera and shook the box, giving Sergei a curious grin. “It’s very light.”

My fingers ripped away the gold paper and found a plain white box. I opened it and saw a postcard from Monte Carlo with a photo of majestic buildings rising above the sparkling blue Mediterranean Sea. Picking up the card, I flipped it over and read the back –
Sting, July 4, 2006, the Sporting Club, table 370
.

“Are we going to the Sting concert in Monte Carlo?” I shrieked.

“It’s during your break from the Ice Champions tour. We’re going for three days.” Sergei grinned.

I continued to gape at the postcard. Seeing our favorite artist in one of the most beautiful cities in the world? Best gift ever!

“I can’t believe you did this.” I threw my arms around Sergei and then pressed my mouth to his.

“Monte Carlo’s by France, right?” Liza asked.

Sergei’s lips left mine. “Yes, it is.”

“Cool.” Liza stood and gathered up an armful of boxes. “I’m going to go try on my new outfits.”

She hurried up the stairs to her room, and I gave Sergei another kiss. “This trip must be really expensive. Should we be spending–”

He placed his finger to my lips. “I’ve got it covered. After all the years of hard work you’ve put in, you deserve something special to celebrate the end of your career.”

“It’s beyond special.” I touched his stubbly cheek. “Thank you.”

He took my hand and kissed my palm. “I get to spend three days on the Riviera with my gorgeous wife, so it’s a pretty great gift for me, too.”

I smiled. “And you still have another present to open.”

He shredded the wrapping paper and peered at the blank DVD case, turning it over and back around.

“You have to put it on to see what it is.” I winked.

He eyed me with amused curiosity as he inserted the disc into the DVD player below the TV. I got up and moved to the sofa, and Sergei sat beside me, snuggling me against him. I laid my head on his soft T-shirt and watched the black screen come to life.

Sergei and I stood on the ice at our rink. His hair was shaved close to his head, making him look even younger than he was, and I wore my Skating Club of Boston fleece jacket. Sergei was holding my wrist in demonstration, and I was nodding with vigor.

“Oh wow.” He squinted at the TV. “Is this our first lesson?”

I grinned. “Remember Aubrey’s mom videotaped parts of our lessons so my parents could see how they were going? My mom thought she’d lost the tape, but she found it when she was cleaning her office. I had it transferred to DVD.”

Sergei’s eyes stayed glued to the screen as the video showed us doing back crossovers together around the rink. I laughed and pointed at the TV. “I look so terrified!”

“I was so nice to you. Why were you terrified?”

“I told you before, you made me nervous because you were so stinkin’ hot.” I squeezed his thigh.

He let out a loud laugh. “Is the black eye you gave me on here?”

“No, she unfortunately didn’t get that on tape. But we do have the day I couldn’t do a death spiral to save my life. Your voice isn’t audible on the video, but you can see yourself talking me off the ledge.”

“Oh, yeah, I remember that. I think it’s the biggest meltdown I’ve ever seen you have.”

We watched more of the footage, alternately laughing and cringing at the collisions we endured. Every one of our lessons ended with smiles, though.

“This is really awesome, Em,” Sergei said.

“We can show it to our kids someday,” I said.

He kissed the top of my head and gently rubbed my stomach. “Maybe next Christmas we’ll have a little one on the way.”

“So soon?” My head popped up.

“We’ve talked about starting a family after you retire.”

“I know, but I thought we’d wait a little while so I can get settled into coaching and we can find a house and everything.”

Sergei nodded slowly but didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to because the disappointment in his eyes said it all.

“I’m not talking years,” I assured him. “I might not be pregnant next Christmas, but maybe we can start trying then.”

He tucked my hair behind my ear. “I’m not going to lie… I’ll be ready the minute you take off your skates for the last time, but I won’t push. I don’t want you to feel rushed.”

“I’ve just been skating for so long that I feel like it’s going to take some time for me to get used to a new identity, and I need to do that before I add being a mom to the mix.”