Finding Alice (Alice Clark Series) (4 page)

“So much for not thinking about it,” I said with a sigh. I packed up my belongings and threw a cover over my canvas. As I walked out, Tina smiled and I nodded in a silent, “Good night.”

The air smelled crisp that Thursday afternoon. It felt as if a warning was lingering in the air, stalking me. I packed my schoolbag for my early religion class and made a quick snack. Bagel and cream cheese. I stuffed the bagel in my mouth like it was an extra hand, grabbed my keys, and headed to campus in a whirlwind of emotions.
Will he be there? Will he know I’ve been dreaming about him? Will he talk in my head again?

“I sound like a lunatic,” I said. I pulled into campus a little late, which meant I got to park on the other side of the world. I hurried to class in a brisk walk, weighing the possibilities ahead. I reached the class and swung open the door. “Nice of you to join us. Take your seat,” Mr. Riley hissed.

With my head down, I did the walk of shame to my desk. I sat down and the teacher continued his lecture on our reading from last week. I looked up at Camille, who was making a “You okay?” look in my direction. I mouthed “Fine” and she smiled, returning her to attention to the lecture. I gazed at Cole for a moment and listened for anything. Nothing. Defeated, I pulled out my book and tried to find out exactly where we were.

“So basically, they went against God and their fall was their banishment from Heaven. Isn’t that what the Bible says?” one of the students said.

“The Bible says Lucifer and a third of the angels fell from Heaven to wed mortal women,” a pretty but plain church-loving girl stated. I tried to take notes on the discussion, coming to the realization that my so-called psychic connection with Cole really was a figment of my imagination.

“Yes, but what do you think about the fall? How does that make you feel? What are your opinions on this? Come on, class. This is the whole point here,” Mr. Riley bellowed. Obviously frustrated, he scratched at his comb over.

I wonder what Cole thinks. Why is everyone staring at me? Crap.

“Miss…?” Mr. Riley asked.

“Alice.”

“Any opinion on the subject?” I twirled my pen at my desk and let a sigh escape my lips.

“I don’t want to offend anyone.”

“This is the wrong class for those who can’t take others’ opinions on such matters.”

“Well, to be honest, I think that in our reading…” I tried to stall.
Just be honest.
“I think God is being sort of childish. He created these perfect beings and then created us. Mortals are allowed to do what they want. They have the will to choose and the right, all with the knowledge God will forgive his children for their sins. However, His perfect beings’ sole purpose is to serve him. I don’t really see anything wrong with them wanting to basically have free will, get married, and have a family. I know it’s not quite that simple, but the truth is, nothing is that simple. God seems to jump to banishing those who don’t do exactly as He wants, which to me is similar to a woman during that time of the month. Everyone breaks the rules. What is the point of existence if not for yourself? Eternal life as a servant? It doesn’t seem noble. It sounds like a prison for the soul or Battered Wife Syndrome.”

I barely took a breath in between sentences. I looked around the class and could feel the burn of their judgment all over me, except for a few. Cole glanced at me with a reassuring smile and just as quickly looked away. Camille looked absolutely stunned and the church girl was most likely considering the commandment “Thou shalt not kill” was overrated. As I said, she could always repent later.

“That is a very interesting point of view, Alice. Thank you,” Mr. Riley said with a satisfied smile. “Everyone, try not to be too hard on Alice. You should thank her. Her ability to talk about her opinions on such a tip-toe subject with that boldness just bought you all a free pass on the quiz.”

I felt the weight of the room lift a little and I was overwhelmingly grateful. The class continued to discuss the issue but no part of my brain could entertain their bickering any longer. I let my so-called opinions rustle in my mind while I gazed out the window. For some reason, I just felt for the angels.
Thankfully I didn’t bring up all the things angels taught mortals—the things mankind uses today to save lives and prove things like evolution
. I let a silent sigh out and focused back in on the class just in time to see Mr. Riley writing on the board what section we would be reading next and excusing us from class.

“Do you need a ride today?” I said, testing to see if what I said in class bothered her.

“Yes, ma’am. Thanks,” Camille answered. It hadn’t, thankfully.

When we got out to the parking lot, it was raining. I started to laugh, pointing at my car in the last parking spot at the furthest point in the lot. She laughed too and we both ran through the rain, jumping in random puddles, trying to splash each other as we made our way to my car. Moments like that I treasured. In the car, we shivered, soaking wet. I turned the heat up and she looked at me with a “So worth it” smile. I returned the smile and peeled out of the parking lot.

It had been a few weeks since school started and I was really starting to get into my niche. Every Thursday after class, Camille hitched a ride with me to the bar and an hour or so after we arrived, Cole would show up. He started coming a few other nights a week, chatting with Old Gray about who knows what. I wasn’t complaining, though. It was weird to me that I used to work just to have something to do and now enjoyed being social, which I was sure I could blame on Camille. Cole talked to me a little more than he used to. Usually it started with banter between him and Old Gray, and I would throw in a “woman’s opinion on the matter,” which is what he called it. Sometimes when we would talk, it felt like electricity surging through me. I took what I could get.

My Art Medium class was going amazingly well. My teacher gave us so much freedom and with that, I had been creating the most bizarre works. I was glad Cole wasn’t in that class. I saw his face in all my work even if nobody else did. Only a few weeks into the semester, my teacher already wanted to showcase my work. I didn’t know if that was such a good idea. Some part of me was telling me that this story was better left untold. Not to mention, it would kind of kill my under-the-radar persona I had been pursuing since I ran away.

I love this shower
. It was just a degree under too hot, which felt amazing. I threw on some clean clothes, scooted back to the kitchen, and tried to find something to veg on. I looked in the fridge and just as I had expected, there was really nothing there; nothing edible, anyway. I grabbed my stuff and ran out the door, slamming it behind me with a good ninja kick. I stopped and breathed in the fresh air with eyes closed under my thick, black sunglasses. Thursday had become my new favorite day.

It had been a whole week since I hadn’t had any crazy dreams about Cole. I wasn’t complaining. He was beautiful. But the more we talked, the more it made me feel like a stalker when dreaming about him; only sometimes, though. Dreaming about Cole meant I was also dreaming about the darkness and the barrage of voices, too. Whatever the other thing was in the dreams, it haunted me when I was awake. It chased me while asleep and only got stronger every time. Sometimes, in the darkness, I felt like it was actually right there with me, breathing on my neck, sniffing at my hair. I shook off the eerie feeling the memory of my dreams gave me and headed over to Camille’s. I had promised to give her a ride today.

I pulled up into the beautiful rounded driveway to Camille’s house. The entire home looked imported from somewhere beautiful overseas. “Wow, she’s been slumming it with me,” I said. Camille came darting out of the house scratching her head, I assumed trying to shake off that rich girl look. She got in the car and looked at me guiltily.

“Thanks for the ride,” she said. I nodded and didn’t say a word. She let a slight smile slip in relief. That’s the kind of friends we were. We knew when to shut up. “Is Cole coming to the bar tonight?” Then there were those times when she didn’t know to shut it.

“No idea,” I said, trying to play it cool and failing.

Class was particularly boring that day. We were partnered up to debate previous concepts to help us choose our topics for our final papers. Of course, we didn’t get to choose our partners and of course, Mr. Riley partnered me with the church girl. We spent the majority of the time starting a debate and ending it with her glaring at me.

“Okay, class. For next week, I want to at least see a start on your final paper. Actually pick a topic and start writing. You know, that thing you do when an idea forms and pen hits paper? That is all. Get out,” Mr. Riley said.

Camille grabbed me, placing her arm in mine, and we headed out to the bar, as usual.

I made another drink for Camille and she fluttered off to Jake by the pool tables.

I felt his smile on the back of my neck. “Can I get another drink?” Cole asked. I grabbed his empty glass and he caught my hand in his. “Can I get something different?”

“Like what?” I was sure I stuttered. We had only brushed against each other a few times and every time, it was intoxicating and mesmerizing.

“Surprise me,” he said with a wolf-like grin. I barely took my eyes off of him while I mixed his drink. They were piercing and he had to know the effect they had on me. I would say it should have been considered abuse, but I liked it. I handed him his new drink with my own wolfy smirk. “What is it?” he asked, taking a sip.

“Sex on the beach.” He started to choke on it. “Oh my God. Are you okay?” I panicked.

“I’m good, thank you.” He regained his composure, raising the glass to me. We both shared an under-the-breath chuckle.

The weekend flew by like a freight train. In class, I had to tell Tina I was not comfortable with putting my work in the showcase. She asked me to take another week to think about it.
What’s the big deal, anyhow? It’s not like anyone would realize it was Cole I was drawing or understand the darkness. It’s not like he would come to the showcase, I think
. I loaded my supplies into my car and headed to the bar. One of Max’s kids were in town, so I told him I would cover his shift in exchange for getting off early Thursday night so I could hang out and drink with my friends.
I have friends
. I hid the smirk as if someone was watching.