Happy Families (4 page)

Lisa was also still in pain over her split from Keith. It wasn’t that she still missed
him.
He
hadn’t been that great for quite a few years of her marriage. She’d more or less been on her own for about five years before he left. It just left her feeling too… What was the word? Open? Unprotected? Vulnerable?

The truth was Lisa was nervous that the party had only got going when Mark arrived. She was enjoying having him around far too much. It couldn’t be a good thing, getting involved with a younger man. He wouldn’t stay forever. She didn’t know why he’d stayed this long. As usual when these thoughts flooded into Lisa’s head, she ignored them.

‘I’m too young for the menopause,’ said Lisa, hotly.

‘It happens to some people earlier than others,’ said Carol. Was she enjoying this?

Lisa wanted to ask Carol if early menopause was a family trait. Had Carol been through it? But she was too embarrassed. Carol and Lisa had never, ever talked about anything like that. Between them they’d been through five pregnancies. In all that time they’d pretended to be like Barbie dolls (at least ‘down there’). Sadly, neither of them had Barbie-like pert boobs or tiny waists.

As soon as Lisa put down the phone she went on the internet and did a search on
‘menopause’. She didn’t like what she found. Maybe she was closer to being a granny than she’d thought! She was getting old before her time. It wasn’t fair!

Then Lisa called Gill. Lisa knew that Gill was the perfect person to call. Their friendship had really developed in just a few weeks. Lisa could pick up the phone and talk about hot flushes with Gill and be honest.

‘What makes you think you’re menopausal?’ asked Gill.

‘I went on the web. I looked up the symptoms. I have about thirty of the possible thirty-five!’ Lisa wanted to cry. She didn’t want to get old. Who does?

‘Read the list to me,’ said Gill.

‘Hot flushes, trouble sleeping and night sweats,’ said Lisa.

‘That’s probably just because the totally fab Mark stays over at your place more often than not. You’ve forgotten that it’s sweaty sleeping with someone else in the bed,’ said Gill.

‘You paint such a romantic picture,’ said Lisa. She read more from her list. ‘Irregular heartbeat.’

‘I’d put that down to Mark too. His smile makes
my
heart flutter,’ said Gill.

‘Mood swings, sudden tears,’ said Lisa.

‘Is that a warning?’ asked Gill.

‘Irritability,’ Lisa said with some anger. Why couldn’t Gill take this seriously?

Lisa skipped over the next two symptoms. One was loss of sex drive. She didn’t have a problem there. The other had to do with what her mum called her ‘front bottom’. She couldn’t bring herself to say the words over the phone. Face to face and a glass of wine in hand maybe, but not now.

Lisa read on. ‘Tiredness, anxiety, feelings of dread, difficulty in concentrating, memory lapses.’

‘Lisa, maybe this isn’t the menopause, maybe this is your personality,’ said Gill.

She was trying to be helpful.

Gill was not going to be serious. She often laughed when Lisa had a moan. It was one of the things Lisa liked about her. Lisa decided to shut up. She didn’t tell Gill about her sore boobs or mucked-up cycle. The mucked-up cycle had been going on for a couple of months now. Lisa hadn’t wanted to face the fact. What was the point in talking about it? It was the menopause. Cold hard fact. Lisa would pop to Boots and see if there were any vitamins that would help.

‘How are things with you?’ Lisa asked to be polite.

‘Your brother rang me and asked me for a date,’ said Gill.

‘What? I hope you told him where to get off! John’s a cheating, many-timing rat. I wouldn’t wish him on my worst enemy, let alone my new friend. He’s selfish, lazy commitment-phobic and yet women just melt. I don’t get it,’ said Lisa.

‘It’s his smile,’ said Gill. ‘He has a lovely smile.’

‘Really? I think he always looks smug. Still, well done you, for telling him to hop it,’ said Lisa.

‘I said yes, actually,’ said Gill.

‘Oh.’

Although Gill had married, divorced and had kids, she wasn’t like Lisa. Gill hadn’t been worn down with worry about school tests, hearing tests, swimming lessons and other mum stuff. She looked about ten years younger than Lisa and had a decent job as the manager at Next in the High Street.

The bad news was that she still secretly believed in ‘the one’. Even though she’d rowed with her old ‘one’ about who got the furniture.

‘I thought you were OK with this. He said
you gave him my number,’ said Gill.

‘Well, he lied. Get used to it.’ First of many, no doubt. ‘He must have nosed through my address book while he was babysitting when I was at my night class,’ said Lisa.

‘He’s taking me to that new Italian in town,’ said Gill. She sounded happy.

‘Order something expensive,’ said Lisa. She sounded cross.

Since Lisa was fourteen, John had dated a number of her friends. It always ended badly. Lisa’s friends never wanted to admit they’d been taken for a fool or that John was a rat. So, oddly, Lisa always got the blame. She’d lost more friends through John’s romantic adventures than she cared to remember.

‘He breaks hearts,’ said Lisa.

But she knew she was wasting her breath. No one ever learnt from anyone else’s mistakes, and few of us learn from our own. Lisa was not looking forward to another friend getting hurt.

‘I don’t think you should go on the date,’ said Lisa.

Gill was huffy. ‘You need to learn to trust again. Your problem is you can no longer see chance or even goodness
anywhere.’

‘That’s not true,’ said Lisa, hurt.

‘Yes, it is. Look at the way you treat Mark,’ said Gill.

‘I don’t treat Mark badly.’

‘You hardly know he’s there, Lisa! You’ve just talked about your imaginary menopause for longer than you’ve ever talked to me about Mark.’

Really? That couldn’t be right, could it?

‘You should enjoy this new love,’ said Gill.

What was she talking about? New love? What did Mark have to do with love? Mark was a fling, a stopgap, something other than Keith. That was all.

Gill had not finished. ‘And one more thing. You’d better buy a pregnancy test. Just in case.’

With that she hung up the phone.

7

17 October

Lisa’s boss and his wife had gone on holiday and left Lisa in charge of running the café. She couldn’t believe that Dave trusted her so much. When he’d dropped off the keys at Lisa’s house he had looked worried. Maybe he couldn’t believe he trusted Lisa either.

Lisa would not be working alone. Betty (who had worked at ‘N Chips’ since forever) was coming in every day to help. She was very old, so she wouldn’t be much help with serving or cleaning. But Betty was great at scaring people into buying things they didn’t really want. She told them chips were good for them. She told them they needed fattening up. People loved it. It was a gift. With Betty around they’d do a good trade.

This wasn’t a good time for extra duties at work. Lisa was in the middle of a serious ‘can-we-get-a-puppy-for-Christmas?’ debate with Jack.

‘I know dogs are for life, not just for Christmas. That’s what I like about them,’ he said over and over again.

Then he’d look sadly at the picture of his dad that he kept on his bedside table.

Lisa thought he might be messing around with this emotional blackmail stuff, but she might not be strong enough to turn him down. What if he did need a dog to feel safe and she had ignored his plea? It might not be a scam. Maybe he’d like a Labrador. Lisa told herself she’d lose weight walking it. She didn’t believe Jack would walk the dog – at least, not after the first week, whatever he promised. She wasn’t born yesterday.

Also, Lisa was fighting early menopause. It was official. When she’d asked the teenager who was serving at Boots if there were vitamins to help with the menopause the teenager hadn’t said, ‘You’re too young!’ She’d just pointed to the shelf. There, Lisa had consulted a professional! Gill was out of her mind to talk about pregnancy tests. Lisa was menopausal, closer to being a granny than a mum.

Also she had a lot of homework from her DIY course. And her friend was dating her silly, careless brother, and then there was Mark.

Gill said Lisa took Mark for granted. Was that
true? It wasn’t that Lisa was too confident. The opposite! Lisa didn’t want to start to depend on Mark in case he went away. OK, at the moment he was always around. Right now, he was bringing Lisa chocolate. He checked that Jack was using the internet for homework, and just homework! He made Kerry and Paula laugh (often a superhuman thing). But for how long?

Lisa was worried that Mark’s kindness would not last. She was keeping her distance. Just because he’d never done anything to hurt Lisa
yet
didn’t mean he was not going to at some point. Did it? Look at Keith.

But Keith was not a good comparison. Hand on heart, he’d never have got the ‘Husband of the Year’ award. Before running off with the Big Breasted Woman he hadn’t been too bad. He hadn’t beaten her or taken drugs. But he hadn’t been too good either. Keith had never been caring or kind like Mark was. Even before he had left with the Big Breasted Woman, Lisa had often been lonely.

Lisa thought about Mark all morning. She thought about him as she checked stock, cleaned ovens and fried chips. Paula came into the café at lunchtime with her spotty mates. Lisa made them all eat apples. She had brought
the apples from home. Paula rolled her eyes. She said her mum was ‘total sad’. Paula was shy about her mum openly caring. It was a teenage thing. But Lisa knew it was important for kids to eat well. After they had eaten the apples, she gave them all free chips. She knew it was important to be liked!

Lisa pulled Paula to one side.

‘Would you say I’m nice to Mark?’ she asked.

For once, Paula didn’t pretend not to understand her mum. ‘Does
he
say you are nice to him?’ she asked.

‘I’ve never asked him,’ said Lisa.

‘Duh.’

Paula stared at Lisa in the way Lisa stared at Paula when they got her school report. She looked a bit sad and cross. The phrase ‘could try harder’ came to mind.

‘You’re not awful to him, I suppose.’ Paula looked at her feet. This talk was costing her. ‘But you don’t seem
into
him. Like, when’s his birthday?’

‘Erm, late March.’ Lisa guessed.

‘April the first,’ said Paula. ‘What’s his favourite colour?’

‘No idea,’ said Lisa.

‘Or his favourite band?’ asked Paula.

Lisa got the point, so she told Paula to go back to school.

Lisa’s mum called. She seemed to have forgotten Lisa was forty-two, and felt the need to check up on her as the boss was away.

‘Café still standing, is it? You haven’t burnt it down?’ she asked.

‘No,’ said Lisa.

‘Chip pan fires are very easy to start,’ warned Lisa’s mum.

‘We use oven chips,’ Lisa lied.

The phone call was long and one-sided. Lisa served customers, but she let some sausages burn so she told her mum she needed to go.

‘It’s good to know that you’ve got Mark,’ said Lisa’s mum.

‘What is this? Love-Mark-Week?’ asked Lisa.

‘He’ll help you cash up tonight. He’s good with numbers,’ added her mum.

‘And I’m not?’ said Lisa. She sounded a bit cross.

‘Well, no, love, you’re not. You’re good with customers. Everyone likes chatting to you. But we both know that you re-sat your maths O level twice.’ And Lisa still hadn’t passed, but her mum didn’t add that. She was not a cruel woman.

It took Lisa an hour and a half to cash up at
the end of the day. It normally took Dave thirty minutes. But it added up in the end, so Lisa was happy. And they had taken a lot of money. It was a good day.

As Lisa left the café and set the alarm, Mark turned up.

‘All cashed up?’ he asked.

‘Yup,’ said Lisa.

‘Well done, love. I knew you’d do really well.’ That was nice, because no one else seemed sure. ‘Here.’

Mark pushed a bunch of flowers under Lisa’s nose. They were a mixture of roses and that tiny white-flowered stuff called babies’ breath.

‘They’re so lovely,’ said Lisa. She gave him a great big kiss. She usually didn’t like to kiss in public. But today she thought it was OK.

The roses were pink.

‘Pink is my favourite colour,’ said Lisa.

‘I know,’ said Mark.

‘What’s your favourite colour, Mark?’

‘Blue.’

‘And what’s your favourite band?’ asked Lisa.

‘Red Hot Chilli Peppers,’ he said.

On the way home Mark listed his five favourite movies. Lisa and Mark had three in common. Not bad!

8

24 October

When Lisa had said she’d look after the café for the week, she’d forgotten it was half-term. She’d had to farm out the kids to anyone who’d have them or drag the youngest two into the café with her. Jack was pleased. He’d live off chips if he could. But Paula had suddenly become a vegetarian. She had found out that pretty much everything sold in the café had animal fat in it. Then she started to tell the customers all about killing animals for food. It wasn’t pretty to listen to. Lisa lost three sales in five minutes. So she gave Paula a fiver and sent her to the paper shop. Dave needed a business to come back to.

Dave and his wife were on a boat, sailing to Norway. They wanted to see ice and things. Lisa didn’t see the point. You might as well save your cash and wait for winter. They were usually snowed in until about May round here. Besides, Lisa was not a water-baby. Feeding
ducks in the park often made her feel seasick. But then, pretty much everything made her sick at the moment. The vitamins hadn’t helped much.

Lisa was just wondering whether to fry more chips for the lunchtime rush when Carol called. Carol only ever called if someone had died, or Lisa had done something Carol didn’t like. It meant they talked often. Lisa answered with some fear.

‘Gill has told John, and John told me. How could you?’ Carol said.

Lisa wondered what was wrong. Since she’d last seen Carol Lisa had visited Gill’s hairdresser. She’d had blonde highlights put in. And she’d bought a new winter coat. Why would these things make Carol angry?