Hell on Heels Christmas (16 page)

“Hey honey.”

Regan burst into tears and stumbled over to her mom and collapsed on the couch. Her mom cooed and pat her on the head. The front door opened and Missy walked in and sat, watching Regan clinically while she crossed her legs and waited for the storm to die down.

“What happened?” Valerie asked.

“Stupid asshole and that whore,” Regan sobbed.

Valerie looked at Missy for a translation but she shrugged, just as bewildered as her mom. Regan pushed her mom’s hands away and sat up to snatch some tissues and pull herself together. When she saw Missy she sneered and leaned her head back to
ease her pounding head.

“Who’s the whore?” Missy asked.

“Allison.”

Valerie frowned. “She’s a nice girl.”

Regan glared at her through swollen eyes. “You think I don’t know that?”

“I’m confused,” Missy admitted.

“Because you’re stupid,” Regan snapped.

“Hey, I went to college!”

“Regan, stop messing with Missy and spill your guts,” Valerie said impatiently.

Regan groaned and covered her face with both hands. “I told Brooks something I shouldn’t have.”

“You told him someone was better in bed than he was? That was low.”

“No,” Regan moaned. “It was worse.”

“You told him you had a threesome?”

Regan snorted. “I wish. I told him that I saw him get married.”

“What?” Valerie and Missy shrieked together.

Regan lowered her hands and looked at them. “I… wasn’t doing well so I came back the day Brooks got married. The town was empty and I was passing the church and I saw all the cars. I thought someone died and,” she shot a glance at her mother and looked away. “I thought I might know who it was so I stopped and looked in. They were saying their vows.”

Regan didn’t tell them that Paula saw her standing in the entrance of the church and hauled her away before anyone saw her. Paula told Regan she didn’t belong here, that Brooks fell in love with Allison and she had no place in White Mist. Paula held out a bundle of money while Regan just stared at her, tears pouring down her face. The bells tolled as the happy couple walked out of the church and Regan turned away from Paula without taking the money and watched Brooks take pictures with his new bride. It was the worst day of her life. Why the hell hadn’t she kept her mouth shut?

“Shit,” Missy said. “And you told him? Why?”

“He won’t talk about his marriage!” Regan spouted. “He’s all on me about the men I’ve been with but the minute I ask about Allison he shuts down. I never married those guys! He says he never stopped loving me but he put a ring on someone else and screwed her? I don’t know what to believe. I thought I could be with him and not have this.” She gestured to her devastated face.

“No wonder you didn’t come back
,” Valerie said.

Regan looked at her mom’s regretful face and knew she would never tell her what Paula did.
Valerie would never forgive her friend for that. It was meant to be that Regan came back on that day and witnessed what she had. It had fueled her drive to accomplish her dreams.

“What did Brooks say?” Missy asked.

“He couldn’t say anything but I think I saw pity on his face.”

Missy winced. “I don’t know how I’d feel if I saw Guy marrying someone else.”

“Believe me, you don’t want to know,” Regan said and rubbed her aching chest.

Had it been only an hour ago that she’d thought she was content here?
She covered her face as mortification filled her. They were done, finished, over.

Sophie sat
beside Regan, fiddling with her new shoes and admiring them while ignoring her sister and cousin on stage. The Delaney family took up a whole row in the theater with Paula and Al sitting beside her mom. Max and Holly had Bobby between them to keep him out of mischief and JC sat on Regan’s other side taking pictures not of the kids on stage but the reactions of the parents. Regan refused to look for Brooks.

On stage Angel was dressed as an adorable pilgrim while Luke played an Indian.
Angel stared off into space, eating red vines and humming while the older kids took care of the dialogue. Luke took a fruit from the table and bit into it before realizing it was plastic. He chucked it to the side, hitting another kid in the face who started crying. Most of the cast snickered and forgot their lines. Their teacher hissed from the front row and tried to bring order to the giggling kids.

When the play finished they all filed into a gym where there w
as food and long tables set up. Regan heard the whispers and knew Gertie and other neighbors had spread word of her and Brooks’ antics this afternoon. JC’s presence kept most of the gossips at bay because at their core everyone was still polite in front of outsiders. People noted the way Jean-Charles touched her and looked around for Brooks. When she and Jean-Charles sat they were joined by her mom, Uncle Al, Paula, Missy’s brood and Holly who chastised Luke and tried to placate his teacher who was in tears. Everyone chattered and she felt… shielded.

At some point she looked up during her meal and felt her heart sink when she saw Brooks talking to Allison.
They were smiling at one another and Allison handed Brooks her baby. Brooks smiled down at the baby and Allison beamed. They were so in tune with one another and there was no tension between them. Regan looked away and dropped her fork. No one else noticed. They chattered around her when all she wanted to do was run. Angel came over and scooted herself onto Regan’s lap and finished the rest of her meal. Regan leaned forward and breathed in her red vines and jelly beans smell. It calmed her a little but not enough.

“When are you leaving?” Regan asked
Jean-Charles.

Everyone paused because her question had nothing to do with any of the three discussions floating around
the table. Jean-Charles glanced around at their audience before he answered.

“
Day after Thanksgiving. Why?”

Angel
looked up at Regan. “You’re leaving? You said you would stay for Christmas!”

Regan faltered
as she stared down into identical sherry eyes. Angel pouted and her lower lip quivered.

“You did say that, Aunty,”
Sophie interjected. “You didn’t show me your shoes your friend brought from New York!”

Max came over with Bobby. “What’s up?”

“Regan’s trying to bail and my girls are onto her,” Missy said.

Regan glared at her
sister as Max and Bobby looked at her.

“You promised you’d stay for Christmas!” Luke repeated
, standing on the chair across from her.

“You said you’d open presents with us. You never did before!” Bobby said.
“I told you about the hot chocolate and eggnog, right?”

Her siblings smirked as their kids emotionally blackmailed her. Damn it.
Jean-Charles ate a slice of pumpkin pie and watched her with twinkling eyes. He was enjoying seeing her outnumbered and trapped by sentiment.

“I
did say that,” Regan relented.

Max and Missy
high fived and congratulated their kids for forcing Aunt Regan to keep her promises.

Jean-Charles
leaned over and whispered in her ear, “The woman at the front desk at the inn told me that construction worker spanked you for letting me touch you.” He waggled his brows. “You should thank me.”

“Uncle Brooks
spanked
you?” Angel said loudly.

As everyone focused on her Regan wished she could die. It was at that moment Brooks came
over and picked up Sophie so he could sit beside Regan. He settled her niece in his lap.

Angel
looked at him with big eyes. “You spanked my aunty?”

Brooks looked around at the adults and kids who waited for his reply. Regan refused to look at him.

“Just once. She deserved it,” Brooks said.

“You can’t spank her. She’s old!”
Angel informed him.

Brooks lowered his voice. “She likes it.”

Angel looked up at Regan. “You like being spanked? It hurts!”

“
I think you have to go to the bathroom,” Regan said and got up with her niece in her arms.

While her niece took care of her business
in the bathroom Regan banged her head against the wall. What was she doing here? Angel came out of the stall with a smile on her face and Regan’s heart melted. That’s why. Angel took her hand as they walked out of the bathroom. Brooks stepped in front of them with Guy by his side.

“Come
on Angel,” Guy said.

“Don’t spank her!”
Angel bellowed up at Brooks before taking her dad’s hand.

Guy
chuckled. When Regan tried to follow them back to their table Brooks stepped in front of her and gestured to the door that led out to the parking lot.

“I told y
ou we’re done,” she said through clenched teeth.

“I want to talk to you.”

“Are you deaf?” Regan snapped. “We’re over!”

The flash of fury was so quick she wasn’t prepared when he grabbed her arm and dragged her outside. The door slammed shut behind them and cold wind whipped in her face.
A fine sprinkling of snow drifted around them as Brooks dragged her to his truck and shoved her into the passenger seat. She shrieked when he pulled the lever that reclined the seat back, laying her nearly flat. Brooks climbed on top of her and slammed the door shut.

“What the hell are you doing?” Regan shouted.

Half of his windshield was covered in snow but there was enough illumination from the outside gym lights to see his face which was set in determined lines. He unbuttoned his coat and shrugged it off as he maneuvered until they were on their sides facing each other. He draped his coat over both of them.

“What do you want?” she snarled.

“I want you.”

“You can’t have me.”

She struggled to get over him to the door but he turned on his back so she straddled him and reached over with his long arm and pressed a button on the driver’s side. She yanked at the door with no results as he raised the back of the chair so he was in a normal sitting position.

“Child safety locks,” he explained with a smile.

“What do you want to say to me? I want to get back to my family.”

He sobered. “I’m sorry you
saw that.”

H
e didn’t need to elaborate.

“Whatever. What else?”

“Allison was-”

“I don’t want to hear about you two!” she shouted and tried to crawl over the console to the driver’s side.

He wrapped his arms around her and short of a full on fight, she wasn’t going anywhere. “My marriage to Allison was-”

“I don’t want to hear this!”

“Horrible.”

“What?”

“She married me because Grady broke it off with her when he was doing well in professional football. He started dating other women and Allison and I became good friends. We wanted the same things in life so we got married even though we weren’t in love.”

“You expect that to make me feel better?” Regan said quietly.

He sighed. “No. That’s why I don’t talk about my marriage. It was wrong all around. For us to marry when we were stuck on someone else…”

“You’re still close to her.” Regan couldn’t stop the accusatory tone.

He nodded. “We went through our own personal hell together. She cried a lot and I worked a lot of overtime. It took us a long time to call it quits because we didn’t want to hurt each other.”

Did he want her to feel guilty for marrying Allison? She wanted to forget the day she watched him and Allison say their “I do’s” and she definitely wanted to forget that she ever told Brooks that she came back, hoping he would still be waiting for her. She knew life moved on. The day of Brooks
’ wedding was the day that Regan realized she had to look forward, never back at her past and she hadn’t.

“Say something,” Brooks said, brushing her hair back from her face.

“I don’t have anything to say.”

She tried to push off of him but he cursed and buried his face in her chest as his arms
wrapped around her hips to hold her in place.

“I don’t know what to do with you,” he said in a muffled voice.

“You don’t have to do anything with me.”

“Yes. I do. I can’t help myself.”

He looked up at her and there was such want on his face it tied her stomach in knots. How did people stand to have someone look at them this way? Brooks looked at her as if she was his whole life and it terrified her. She wasn’t a good person for him. She was selfish, ambitious and she wouldn’t be the housewife he needed. Brooks needed an Allison. He needed a super nice bubbly wife who would put on an apron and make him cookies and lunch every day. She wasn’t that girl.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she whispered.

“I can’t help it.”

“What do you want from me?” she whispered.

“Everything.”

“What if I can’t?”

“I’ll take whatever you can.”

She braced herself. “About marriage…”

“Yeah?”

“You know it scares me shitless.”

“You were engaged to that billionaire,” he pointed out gruffly.

“It made sense for us to be together. We worked well together and I put order into his company and his life and he likes that.”

Brooks stared at her and she replayed her own words and couldn’t believe she would get engaged to someone for such coldblooded reasons. Maybe she had changed but when she caught Daniel cheating she had enough sense to break it off.

“What are you so afraid of?”

She let out a strained laugh. “I wish I knew. Before I was afraid of being trapped in White Mist, of not being able to see the world and now… I have no idea. I don’t know what I want.”

“You seem happy. Are you?”

She considered that. “Yes. I like the way things are going now but beyond that… I want to know I have a choice if I need to leave.”

They sat in silence for several minutes. They were at a standoff and it was reminiscent of their past. He wanted marriage, stability and she wanted freedom. She pat his chest and kissed him on the cheek.

“I need time. Tomorrow’s Thanksgiving. I’ll see you there.”

Brooks didn’t try to stop her as she climbed over to the driver’s seat and let herself out. She walked back to the gym even as Brooks drove away. She walked over to the family and sat beside JC and leaned into him. He put his arm on the back of her chair.

“What happened?” he asked quietly.

“There must be something wrong with me. Brooks wants me and I keep holding him off.”

“Do you love him?”

She sighed and watched her nieces and nephews together. Did she want kids? A husband? What did she want and why was it so hard for her to decide?

“I do but I don’t know if that’s enough.”

“I’m not good at this love stuff either. Women say they’re okay with me taking off to go on shoots but then they start clinging and complaining. They don’t realize I
have
to travel to get the shots I need and I love it.”

“You and I would actually be a great couple.”

JC laughed. “Actually, you were irritated with me most of the time we were together.”

She slapped his leg. “See! What the hell is wrong with me?”

“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you. It’s just that you were so hurt by everyone turning against you when you left here that you’re overly cautious when committing to someone.”

“You’re a good guy,” she sighed. “I’m happy you’re here.”

“After Johnny told me about his trip here I had to see for myself. It’s bizarre seeing you in this setting but it fits.”

“Regan, we gotta go,” Valerie said.

Regan turned to JC and kissed him. “You’re coming tomorrow, right?”

“Yeah. Around noon, right?”

“Right.”

The Delaney’s trotted out to the parking lot, bundled up against the cold. She rode in the back of Missy’s huge SUV and listened to everyone chatter. When she and Valerie walked into her house and hung up their coats Valerie touched her arm.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Nah. I think I just need to sleep on it.”

Regan went up to her room and pulled out her laptop. Her lips quirked in a smile when she saw how many items sold. She made a spreadsheet and uploaded more photos and checked her emails. Her brows rose when she saw that the emails weren’t from Daniel or Erica or her employees but requests for merchandise from her business contacts around the world.