Hesitant Heart (17 page)

Aaron hugged him tighter. “I know, sweet Sam. That’s why I feel you’re ready to come with me to the club this Saturday. Thomas is an old friend and I’d phoned him to let him know that I’d found someone who I’d be showing off at the club this weekend. At the last minute, he decided to drive in from Santa Barbara to be here for that. He arrived a few days early so he could catch up with me and a few of our other mutual acquaintances.”

Sam’s stomach twisted and he groaned. He was such an idiot. Aaron had been anxious to show him off to his friend and he’d behaved like a petulant child instead. Then something else pierced though his awareness.

“The club? This Saturday?”

It had been a major goal, something Aaron had been working on with him from the beginning. He’d been nervous about it all along, but he also knew enough to tell that it was a very big deal. Aaron explained that he’d never, ever taken a submissive to any club before. There had never been anyone he’d claimed as his and had been proud to show off. Aaron had also told him that the first night they went there, Sam would get a surprise.

“Oh, Sir. Do you really think I’m ready? I’m so sorry I acted like that—”

Aaron placed two fingers on Sam’s lips.

“Shush now or I’ll have to gag you. What happens when I say you’re forgiven?” Aaron took his hand away.

“It’s over and done with.”

“Correct. And do I ever say something I don’t mean?”

“No, Sir, you don’t.”

“There’s my perfect boy. Let’s make plans after one more thing.”

“What thing?”

“I want to taste your perfect pink hole then make you come in my mouth.”

Oh.

Chapter Eleven

Their session the previous night had been breath-taking. Aaron was so proud of Sam he thought he might burst. It had been the first time Aaron had ever used the belt on Sam. It was also the first time he’d inflicted intense pain on his boy since he’d introduced him to the brush. The tone of the encounter had been completely different however. The focus had been on an erotic exchange. Sam hadn’t come while being beaten with the belt, but it had only taken a few quick tugs before he’d spilled all over the floor.

The image of Sam with his arms stretched to the ceiling, his wrists bound with thick strips of leather that had been attached to a meat hook—if he thought about it much more, he would likely come from the visual alone. The stripes he’d laid across Sam’s perfect little round ass had been exactly as Aaron had wanted. The welts were clearly defined and raised. No skin had been broken, but it was obvious that his boy had taken a strong thrashing for his Master.

If he agrees.

The flutters that kept rising up in his stomach returned. During the times Sam had been at work, Aaron had gone to the leather smith he always used for any garments or other items he needed made. He’d given him a sketch of what he wanted made for Sam. Once he presented the item to Sam, he would ask his lover to call him Master. Sam would always be his boy, but he wanted to make a public commitment. He wanted Sam to know that he’d always be protected and cared for.

His sweet Sam entered the bedroom, his showering complete. He presented himself for inspection. Aaron gave him a cursory check—Sam had never failed to please him in his grooming habits. If nothing else, it was yet another wonderful excuse to fondle him.

“How do they look, Sir?” Sam struggled to peer over his shoulder in order to view his own ass.

“They’re gorgeous like you are, little Sam.”

His face pinked. It was the first time Aaron had seen Sam blush in a while. He knew his boy must be incredibly nervous. Not only would it be his first visit to a sadism and masochism club, but there would be new people to meet and Sam would be the focal point of the evening. He would also be naked and on a leash.

All of those elements had been discussed with Sam ahead of time. Aaron had no intention of humiliating or frightening him. It was something that they had worked on together as a committed couple and the coming evening would be a big step for the two of them to take.

But it was time for the one surprise that had Aaron’s typically controlled façade crumbling.

“Sweet, little Sam. Come and sit with me.”

Aaron laced their fingers together and tugged him toward the bed. Sam had a confused expression, his brow furrowed, but he didn’t appear scared. It was likely that as prepared as Sam was for the evening, he still had to have plenty of nervousness about the unfamiliar experience he was about to face.

He watched with concern as Sam perched on the edge of the mattress, placing most of his weight on one hip.

“I’m fine, Sir.”

I need to watch myself.

He’d never been so soft with a submissive as he was with Sam. Of course, he’d also never been in love with anyone—submissive or not—so that had to be influencing his interactions with his boy as well. Aaron reached under the pillow to retrieve a slim leather case. Sam’s eyes widened with curiosity as he waited to see what it was all about. Aaron inhaled deeply. It was time for him to throw his heart at Sam’s mercy. He’d hesitated for years to give himself emotionally to anyone, always finding excuses as to why he was alone, hiding in the shadows by paying men instead of connecting with them. Sam had changed everything. Sam had changed
him
.

“I had something very special made for you, Sam. I’m hoping that you will agree to wear it tonight.”

“I’ll wear anything you tell me to, Sir.”

“I know you would, my sweet Sam. But I’m not telling you. This is something you must decide to do on your own. It has to be because
you
want it.”

The signals Sam gave off when he was distressed were easy for Aaron to spot—he knew his lover so well. There would be the tiniest crease between his eyebrows and his lips would purse slightly. Someone who didn’t understand his little Sam as well as he did would never be aware of it. Aaron meant to keep it that way by letting Sam know that he wanted to keep him forever. Aaron removed the velvet-lined lid to the case. Inside lay the hand-tooled leather collar he’d had made especially for his Sam. Intertwining vines had been carved into the one inch wide, black strip. The buckle was studded with small diamonds and there was a steel ring embedded in the collar to which Aaron would attach Sam’s leash.

Although Sam had known that Aaron planned to lead him around on a leash for the evening, Aaron hadn’t spoken of what would be used. He’d wanted to save everything as a wonderful surprise.

Sam stared at the collar, his expression one of awe and disbelief. Aaron plucked the item from the box and held it out to him.

“If you accept this, little Sam, I will be your Master for always. Will you take this collar as a symbol of my commitment to you and to our lives together?”

Aaron watched as realization dawned on Sam’s face. He could tell what Sam’s answer would be and his heart already rejoiced from it.

“Oh, Sir, I mean…Master!” Sam’s eyes glittered. “Master.”

Happiness radiated from Sam. He was anything but calm and still—he was a bundle of excited energy. Aaron couldn’t think of a more appropriate time for such behavior.

“Kneel in front of me, little Sam. I want to put your collar on you.”

There was no hesitation as Sam sank to his knees and presented his neck to Aaron. Aaron’s fingers trembled. He couldn’t remember such a thing ever happening to him before—he was always self-assured. But there was no doubt in his mind that having Sam’s love meant many things would be different in his life from then on. He was grateful for whatever may come, as long as Sam would always be there with him.

Once he’d buckled the collar, checking to make sure it wasn’t too tight or rubbing his skin wrong, he guided Sam to his feet. He led him by the shoulders to the full length mirror. Aaron stood behind him, admiring the beautiful young man who bore his collar and his marks. Sam raised one small hand to tentatively touch the leather accessory decorating his neck.

“So beautiful…”

Aaron wrapped his arms around Sam from behind, suddenly wishing that they weren’t going anywhere, that they were staying in so that Aaron could take Sam over and over until they both collapsed from the exhaustion of it. But everyone was waiting on them and he was anxious to show his boy off. Now that Sam had his marks and his collar, Aaron had the impression that he was just as thrilled to be shown off.

* * * *

The ride over to the club had been almost unbearable because of the sheer anticipation. The unexpected gift from Aaron had also added to his nerves, but in a wonderful way. He touched the collar that was hidden under his top coat for perhaps the twentieth time since they’d left the house. He ran his fingers over the jewels that adorned the buckle and the design carved in the leather. It was the most spectacular thing anyone had ever given him. Aaron had done so much for him. How could he ever come up with anything so grand to give to Aaron?

Even though the evenings had finally cooled off for the year, it was still a bit warm for the top coat. Sam wore it to conceal the neck accessory he wore. Aaron had told him that they could bring it and he could put it on when they got there, but he hadn’t wanted to take it off. He wished he never had to take it off, ever—that it was permanently there to tell the world that he belonged to Aaron Rubenstein.

“Almost there, little Sam.”

They turned onto a street with several very large homes. They were even bigger mansions than the one he’d grown up in.

“This is it.”

Aaron squeezed Sam’s knee as they drove up to imposing iron gates that guarded the long driveway leading to a magnificent Tudor Revival home. Aaron waved to a uniformed man who seemed to recognize him as he pulled the gate aside to let them in. Aaron had shared many things with Sam about how the club was run and the extra precautions they took to keep things secret.

Many cars had already parked in the open area. Modifications had been made so that the driveway continued to the grounds in the back. The club didn’t need to avail themselves of the outdoor amenities. It was much better used as a place to conceal the multitude of vehicles that clogged the property.

“Ah, a special spot has been saved just for us, little Sam.”

He wasn’t sure exactly when the shivering had begun, but it had become uncontrollable. It had nothing to do with the temperature. Aaron grasped his shoulder and he jumped.

“Shh. Look at me.”

Sam turned to his lover.

My Master.

Once the two words ran through his mind, the trembling calmed. He exhaled as he gazed in Aaron’s eyes, Aaron nodding, his approval evident.

“That’s it. Breathe, little Sam.”

“I love you, Master.”

Aaron grinned. “I love you too, my sweet boy.”

Leaning in, Aaron then took a kiss from him. It was soft and slow, Aaron moving his lips over Sam’s repeatedly. Sam remembered to breathe and he drew in the essence of Aaron’s masculine scent, his heated breath. Aaron explored underneath the coat, brushed aside the pesky fabric of the shirt he’d worn tucked into a pair of trousers should they get pulled over by a road cop.

Sam’s leather bound cock filled, swelling against the restriction of the ring at the base of his shaft. His balls that had been separated into two small sacs tightened, their bindings still digging into the sensitive flesh. Aaron gently sucked Sam’s bottom lip into his mouth, toyed with it then let it go with a light scrape of his teeth.

“There we go. Kiss swollen and hard. Every man in there tonight will love you and hate me.”

“Why would they hate you, Sir…Master?” Sam ducked his head. “Sorry.”

Aaron lifted Sam’s chin with his finger. “No sorrys. This is very new.” Aaron chuckled. “It’s quite obvious, isn’t it? They will be mad with jealousy that I have the most stunning and obedient boy in the room.”

Sam had gotten over a lot of his blushing since he’d been with Aaron. It was silly to go around being embarrassed all the time when they were always naked and doing sex things with each other. But it was a very different thing when Aaron praised him so highly. He still stopped to marvel every once in a while that someone as sophisticated, talented and beautiful as Aaron would want to share his whole life with Sam. Plain, ordinary Sam. Yet when he saw himself through Aaron’s eyes, he was special and deserved to be loved.

“Come on. It’s time.”

He nodded. “Yes, Master.”

As he followed Aaron along the pathway leading to the front entrance, Sam went over in his mind all the instructions Aaron had given him in the previous weeks as he’d trained Sam for their special night. Walking to heel was no issue—he did it automatically. It was the things he wasn’t used to that had him on edge. He knew how to walk naked, straight and proud with his gaze cast down, his hands clasped behind his back. They’d practiced with a leash on a plain dog collar. He’d done well with everything. However, he’d never done it in front of a room full of strangers.

They reached the entrance of the enormous home that reminded Sam of a cross between a medieval castle and an English cottage. Two dark oak slatted doors with knockers made of twisted iron rings stood between them and the mysterious interior of the Hampton Road Club. Matching iron handles met in the middle of the doors, strap hinges decorated the edges. Sam and Aaron’s way was lit by two electrified lanterns mounted on either side of the doors. Aaron lifted one of the heavy rings and banged out the sound of a distinctive pattern on the metal piece affixed to the wood.

Focus. Make Aaron proud.

Never once had he considered whether or not he wanted the other people who would be there to like him or think that he was doing good. The only thing that mattered was Aaron’s opinion. The door opened slowly and Aaron leaned down to whisper in his ear.

“Breathe, little Sam.”

He exhaled on a gasp, noting that he had been holding his breath. As always, Aaron knew what he needed, guided him. Another uniformed man who Sam assumed to be a valet, ushered them in. They stood in the dim lighting of the entryway and the white gloved man took their coats. Everything seemed to be constructed of roughhewn wood—only the floors were polished to a high varnished gleam. A thick, rectangular-shaped Oriental rug added color to an otherwise monotone hued space.