Highland Escape (17 page)

Mairi raised an eyebrow, giving a sly smile at her prediction. “Try me.”

Forcing out a breath, Anna launched her first question. “Tell me about passion between a man and a woman.” Anna scanned her face for signs of her reaction.

The corners of Mairi’s mouth tilted up farther.

“Passion is one of the most powerful forces in nature. It can override sound judgment and has been the downfall of good men and women. But ’tis also one of the greatest gifts a man and woman can share. Ye havenae experienced this before?” She sounded surprised.

“No,” Anna whispered, heat spreading on her face.

Mairi gave her the same look of disbelief her daughter had a few days before.

Anna felt the need to explain yet again. “Men in my life have either been enemies or allies. Enemies like the neighboring nobles, who were only interested in me bearing their children, or enemies who have wanted to kill me. Allies have been family, clan, or fellow warriors. I have never had any other kind of relationship with a man.”

Mairi shifted on the bench, turning to face Anna directly. Emboldened, Anna continued.

“A few sons of noblemen attempted to court me in the past. I refused. They were all selfish, power-hungry fools. They only wanted a wife to stay at home, to produce their heirs whilst they continued their dalliances at court. They cared more about the amount of my dowry than me. I would not accept such a life. To become nothing but a well-kept servant and broodmare, forbidden to do the things I enjoy, and expected to be obedient to the whims of the man who possessed me. The rest saw me as a plaything for their entertainment. How can anyone with a shred of pride agree to such an onerous proposal?”

Mairi’s eyes widened in sympathy. “Indeed. Surely not all were so distasteful?”

Anna nodded her head vigorously. “Most were immediately put off by my appearance, behavior and bloodline. I am too tall, too strong and bear too many scars. I helped manage my father’s holdings, and know more about farming and livestock than about sewing or cooking. My Scottish blood certainly weighed against me. It is as popular being Scots there as it is being English here. The few times I attended court or social events, my sharp tongue and opinions did the work of pushing most potential suitors away. They saw me as an unbridled hoyden, not worth the trouble, regardless of my dowry.” Anna laughed at the remembrance of it.

“So your father dinnae force a match upon ye?”

Looking back, it did seem unusual he didn’t. “No, I think he understood how much I abhorred the idea of a forced match, and what kind of trouble I would make. Due to my reputation, I became the target of ridicule among my peers. For these reasons, I ceased attending social events altogether. I found it a relief as I had no desire to play their games. Neither did I find any attraction in their overindulgent lifestyles. Shortly after, any interest in me waned. I find the whole of English nobility repugnant. Having my home burned and my family slaughtered at the order of one only deepens my belief.”

“But recently, ye have experienced passion?”

Anna dropped her eyes, grinning broadly. “Yes,” she answered quietly.

“What do ye wish to know?”

“How can this emotion completely make reason flee? Nothing else existed but him and me. Though quite unnerving, it was a most wonderful possession.”

Mairi gave Anna a knowing smile, boosting her confidence. “Aye, sounds like passion.”

“How do I proceed? How can I know the decisions I make regarding this man are not clouded by these overpowering emotions?”

Mairi patted Anna’s hand before answering. “Time. It takes time to be able to see clearly.”

“How long did it take for you to know about Laird MacGregor?”

A thin, humorless smile appeared on Mairi’s lips and Anna immediately regretted asking the question.

“I am sorry, I did not mean to pry.”

Mairi waved her hand. “No, no, ’tis quite alright. My marriage with Kenneth MacGregor was arranged. As ye know, I am originally from the Stewart clan. Our marriage created an alliance between our people where before only neutrality existed. I knew Kenneth from a distance, with time to develop naught more than a friendly acquaintance before we wed.”

She must have read the expression on Anna’s face. A forced marriage was her worst nightmare, a fact she had thoughtlessly expressed but a few moments ago. Mairi squeezed her hand and smiled.

“’Twas difficult at first, but we have made a good match. We have forged love where none was to start. Passion has played an important role. Marriage has been hard work, but I couldnae ask for a better husband. I believe him to think me a good wife.”

They sat in silence while Anna considered her words.

Mairi shifted on the bench. “Passion is a good place to begin, but there must be trust, mutual respect and caring for love to take root. Often times ’tis more an act of will than a feeling fluttering in the stomach.”

Anna nodded, not sure she understood.

“Men are often stubborn, prideful creatures, who believe the world should bend to their command. We have to look past this part if we are to love them. Otherwise, we would probably wind up killing them.” Mairi chuckled.

Anna giggled. Mairi smoothed a strand of hair from Anna’s face. “So, do I know this braw swain of yers?” She gave Anna a sly look.

“
Aunt Mairi,
you are as bad as your daughter!”

They laughed till both were in tears. A somber thought soon ended Anna’s merriment. Hesitating to make eye contact, she asked, “Do you think me good enough for your son?”

Mairi pulled Anna into her arms. “If I knew no more than the fact ye risked yer life against six men to save two innocent lasses, I would know enough to say aye. Having gotten to know ye these past few weeks has only deepened my affections for ye. As the daughter of a baron, and the granddaughter of a laird, ye are of noble blood, and a good match for Duncan.”

“Even without lands or a dowry?”

Mairi swept her hand in a half circle. “Look about. Do the MacGregors need more wealth? As a mother, I would rather see my son happy than saddled in a marriage without love for more land or coin.”

Anna kissed her cheek. “Thank you.”

“Ye have the advantage, of course. If my son ever acts in any manner but a gentleman, just tell me. His father and I shall take him to task.”

Anna smiled at the image. “I believe I can handle your son, Mairi.”

Chapter 13

Anna caught Mairi’s wink as she filled Kenneth’s goblet with ale. “Husband, Duncan and Anna propose a trip to Graham market for supplies. I have sent word to those who would like to offer goods for sale or barter.”

The laird tore off a chunk of bread and turned to Duncan. “Who do ye think to take?”

“I thought Liam and Rory in one wagon, Donnan and Ross for the other. Malcolm and Ian plus me and Anna should be enough.”

“Very well. When do ye leave?”

“Mayhap five days. Does it suit ye?”

The laird nodded as he took another slice of venison from the platter. “Aye. See if they have some of the wine ye fetched last trip.”

While discussion of the trip continued, Anna realized she was more aware of Duncan than ever. The current seating arrangement always put Anna furthest away from him. Her gaze frequently sought him out, often catching him staring at her. She felt the memory of his lips on hers and hungered to have them there again.

She saw Lady MacGregor’s serene smile and the laird’s half-scowl, and blushed to think they understood the shared glances between her and Duncan. Nessa chattered away, oblivious to the actions of those around her.

“Did anyone hear me?” Nessa asked impatiently, hand on her hip as she stared at Anna and Duncan. The two of them exchanged quick glances, and Mairi smiled indulgently. The laird shook his head and called for more ale.

“I want to know if Anna can bring back velvet to make new gowns.”

“Of course, Nessa. I will be happy to purchase any fabric you ladies might require.” With a last look at Duncan, she listened attentively as Nessa discussed various dress styles.

After the meal, they rose from the table. Rather than joining his father at the hearth, Duncan chatted with the women. Mairi smiled at his behavior, while Nessa gaped at him like he had grown an additional head. Though uncertain why he stayed near them, Anna found herself glad for the additional time in his presence.

As soon as Mairi excused herself to retire for the evening, Duncan spoke. “Anna, would ye like to go for a walk?”

Nessa whipped her head around, waiting to hear Anna’s response.

“Yes, I would.”

A grin split Nessa’s face, lighting her features with joy. A blush heated Anna at Nessa’s reaction. She accepted the arm Duncan offered, and they headed out the door. As they strolled toward the gardens outside the keep, Duncan lifted her hand to his lips, his breath warm on her skin as he kissed her fingers. Moonlight filtered through the clouds, bathing their path in silver light.

Stopping beneath a large oak tree, Duncan leaned against the trunk, pulling Anna into his embrace. She placed her hands on his chest and settled her cheek on his shoulder. Taking a deep breath, she savored his touch and scent. He no longer smelled like horses and leather. The heady, masculine scent belonging only to him filled her senses. They stood several minutes in silence, soaking up each other’s presence.

“Ye are less confused tonight.”

She was glad he sensed the difference. “Yes. I had a discussion with my favorite aunt this afternoon.”

Drawing back slightly, Duncan scrunched his brow, waiting for the rest.

Anna saw the question on his face. Cocking a smile, she laid her head back on his shoulder. “Your mother has asked to be my female counsel.”

His body shook with a mild laugh. “That must have been difficult.”

She shrugged. “What choice do I have? I have experienced nothing like this before and refuse to remain in the dark.”

“I am glad ye have someone to talk to. I cannae think how it has been for ye not to have an older woman to rely on all these years.”

His voice rumbled in his chest and the vibration enticed her to draw closer.

“Your mother has been wonderful. I needed to be sure she approves of me. I want to understand what is happening to me, and do my part…”

Duncan waited for her to finish her thought. She didn’t. “Do your part?” He firmed his embrace, prompting her to explain.

She didn’t answer right away. Her lungs filled deeply before she exhaled with force. “To do my part if you decide to keep me.”

Duncan couldn’t believe his ears. She sought out information from his own mother so she could better understand how to become his
what
? His friend, his lover, his mistress? No, he couldn’t dishonor her by using her that way. He knew they’d already progressed well beyond companionship, past friendship. Marriage was his intent.

Placing his hands on either side of her face, he gazed at her. Anna’s confession merited one from him in return.

“I have felt this pull since the first day I saw ye. I thought ’twas simply desire, as when a man sees a lass who pleases him. I have learned what I feel for ye surpasses simple desire. I’ve never wanted to court anyone before. ’Tis new to me as well.”

His words made her smile. Gazing into his eyes, she asked, “I wondered…”

Meeting her gaze, he mirrored her smile. “What is it, my Anna?”

“Might we kiss again? I promise to be more careful this time.”

Before he could answer, Anna reached both hands around his neck and pulled his mouth to hers. Though she knew better what to expect this time, she found herself swept away as quickly and as thoroughly as before. Hungrily, she kissed him, savoring his taste. How was it possible to want someone this intensely?

Anna molded around his body, needing to get closer. Warmth spread through her, heating every nerve. Her hands found their way under his tunic to his back, craving contact with his skin. She reveled in running her hands over the sculpted muscles quivering under her touch. It empowered her to know she affected him so. His hands did the same to her, accelerating her heart rate, her breathing. With each touch, he set small fires crackling across her skin. It was not enough. Needing his hands everywhere, she ached for skin-on-skin contact.

Duncan broke contact, muttering a low oath. “
Bluidy
hell woman! Ye will be the death of me.”

She fixed her gaze on him. Both out of breath, they teetered on the edge of control.

“Aye, ’twill be a sweet death, no doubt,” she answered, imitating his burr.

He enclosed her in his arms again, and she felt his lips smile when he kissed her forehead and whispered, “Nae doubt.”

In a stupor, she leaned against him as he escorted her back to the keep. His parting kiss landed light as the fall of snowflakes. What it lacked in ardor it made up with tenderness. Anna staggered upstairs, clinging to the rope rail along the wall. Nessa ambushed her the instant she opened the door.

“I
knew
it! Ye and Duncan!” Nessa erupted, dancing with excitement.

Anna realized there’d be no denying it. She knew she had to look different. Her cheeks warmed with remembrance of their passion, and her lips felt swollen from kissing. She simply smiled at Nessa, remembering her teasing from a few weeks ago. Was it only weeks? It seemed much longer. Anna calmly sat down and prepared for bed.