How to Fall in Love (39 page)

“Yeah.” I nod. “I am. He invited me.”

“You could be good for him, Emalie,” Pippa says. “I hope he realizes that. Rainer deserves someone who loves him so much.”

“And love him I do.” I sigh. “No matter how hard it’s been. Anyway, I better get back to it. I’ll see you both tonight.”

“See you!” they both call.

I turn and get back to work. Pippa and Belle leave about an hour later, and I go on my break. I’m working all day, then I’ve got Rainer’s fight tonight. I haven’t heard from him since last night, but I’m sure that he’ll contact me. I don’t know where our relationship will go from here, but I know Rainer wants me in his life.

I just don’t know if I can be in it as only a friend.

~*~*~*~

B
low after blow is delivered to Rainer’s opponent’s face. He’s on fire tonight, looking like a god in the fighting ring. His entire body is wound up, sweating, and he’s like a panther stalking his prey. He moves around the ring with an ease so many fighters lack. He’s smooth and careful, every move precise. His opponent is smaller than him, but a lot quicker. That doesn’t stop Rainer, though. He fights as if he was born to do it.

Maybe he was.

My entire body is heating quicker and quicker the more I stand here watching him. I want to take him out back and fuck him so hard we both scream. He’s only on round two, and they have a few more left to go. It feels like it’s going to take forever, and I want him right now. I squirm in my spot amongst the screaming crowd, and I know my panties are wet.

They’re soaking for him.

For what seems like hours they fight, and then finally Rainer knocks him out cold. The crowd erupts in a cheer, and I keep my eyes on Rainer as he turns and puts a hand up. Then his eyes scan the crowd. I expect them to move straight past me, as they did last time, but instead they stop on me and the lust burning in their depths has me moving towards the locker room with speed.

I reach it and fling it open just in time to see Rainer charging in. Our eyes meet, his chest is rising and falling with pants, and I don’t wait. I run towards him, heels clicking, and hair flying. He catches me when I throw myself at him and our mouths smash together. He grunts and slams my back against the wall. His body is wound up, his muscles big and bulging, a fine sheen of sweat covering them, and I can’t get enough.

I kiss his sweaty mouth, and I don’t care. I love how he tastes. So masculine—so manly. He grips my ass and grinds my wet pussy against his belly. God, I’m so ready for him, so ready for his cock inside me. “Rainer,” I gasp, leaning down and biting his shoulder. He growls, low and deep, and jerks my dress aside so he can reach between us and put his finger inside my panties.

“You’re soaked,” he hisses against my lips.

“Seeing you up there, God, it made me so horny.”

“Fuck. Yes.”

He takes my hips and pulls my panties aside, then he starts rotating my pussy against his stomach. His muscles bunch and pull, and I can feel his warmth against my bare flesh. He feels incredible. I can see my arousal sliding across his belly, and I watch in sexual fascination as he takes it in. “You have the sweetest cunt,” he growls. “Look how wet you are.”

I want to taste him so badly, to put my mouth against his skin. I release my legs, letting them fall down beside me and he lets me go. When I’m on my feet, I take his shorts and jerk them down before lowering myself to my knees. He makes a low, rumbling sound in his chest as I remove his cock, stroking it in one of my hands. God, I want this rougher. I need it rougher.

I lean forward and bite the area just under his belly button. He grunts in pain and his hands find my hair, tangling in it and tugging forcefully. I keep biting, loving how his muscles feel bunching beneath my mouth. His grunts turn to growls of pleasure, and instead of pulling back he presses my face against his stomach, clenching my hair with desperation.

“Fuck,” he groans as I bite and lick his skin.

We’re in a frenzy, and when I lean down and capture his cock in my mouth, he bellows loudly. He thrusts his hips, fucking my mouth with force, and I become so wet I can feel my arousal coating my pussy. I need this cock inside me, but first I need more of this pressure. I need more of this rough play. Rainer jerks my hair and fucks my mouth like a mad man, and I reach around, cupping his hard ass and driving my nails into his skin.

“Fuck,” he roars, jerking me back. “Get on your hands and knees.”

I do as he asks, turning over and presenting my ass to him. He hikes my dress up further and then his hand is cupping my ass. He massages the skin there, and before I can think too much further, he’s driving his cock into my warm heat. I’m so wet he slides in with ease. I mewl desperately, clawing the ground as he starts fucking me with the same force he was just using with my mouth. It’s frantic, wild fucking. Our skin is slapping together, and we’re both panting and crying out. It’s intense.

“So tight. So fucking wet,” he bellows, pinching my skin as he holds onto my hips with his fingers.

“Rainer, God, yes,” I squeal, pushing my ass back into him.

“I’m going to come all over that sweet ass. Are you ready for it?”

“Yes,” I pant, feeling my own orgasm. “Yes, yes, yes!”

It hits me and I scream. My hands go out from beneath me and my face hits the floor with a harsh thud. My mind spins, but I’m experiencing so much pleasure I don’t feel the pain. Rainer roars his release and jerks his cock out just in time for hot strands of come to hit my ass. I feel the warmth and I can hear his hand working his cock frantically as he gets it all out.

As we come down from that incredible high, I realize that my face actually hurts. Rainer pulls me up and his hand instantly goes to where I hit the floor, stroking my cheek. “Shit,” he says, pulling me up farther and spinning me around. “That’s going to bruise. Why didn’t you tell me you hit that hard?”

“It was too good,” I admit, groaning in pain as he rubs his hand over my sensitive cheek again.

“Come on. I’m going to get you some ice.”

We both stand, and I straighten my dress while he pulls his shorts up. He runs his fingers through my hair, holding my gaze the entire time, and then he leans down and kisses me long and deep. We’re interrupted when the door opens and Max comes in, followed by Belle and Pippa. I flush and pull back from Rainer, but we’re both panting and there is no doubt about what we were doing in here.

“Jesus, what the fuck did you two just do?” Max says, eyes wide.

“Isn’t that obvious?” Belle giggles.

Max grins at her, and nods to my face. “What happened?” I touch my cheek and flush harder. Max’s eyes get big and flash to Rainer’s. “You fucked her so hard you gave her a black eye?”

Rainer grunts. “I didn’t hit her, man. She fell forward.”

Belle’s eyes get big now, too, and she starts laughing. “Oh my God, you animals.”

“Excuse me,” Pippa says softly. “I need air.”

She turns and walks out. That was probably an insensitive conversation to have in front of her, but she has to know Rainer and I are doing these kinds of things. I turn to Rainer, but he’s already running out after her. I press my fingers to my bruising cheek. Once again, Pippa comes first.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

THEN – MALI

He’s frantic, I can see it, but I don’t know what’s going on. We’re sitting in his room and he’s looking out the window, just staring into the distance as if someone is going to come past and murder him at any second. I reach over and stoke his arm, but he flinches away. Something is definitely wrong. I can see it in his face. He turns and stares at me, but his eyes are empty.

“Rainer?” I try, reaching over and stroking his arm again.

“You need to go, Emalie,” he says, his voice empty.

“But . . .”

“I won’t ask again. You need to go.”

I stand and walk around, stepping in front of him. He doesn’t meet my eyes. I reach down, taking his face in my hands and finally he looks up at me. He’s got an odd expression on his face, and he looks as if he’s trying to fight something. He’s holding back his emotions, I can see that, but I don’t know why. We’ve come this far—why the hell is he trying to push me away now?

“Rainer, you know I’m not going to leave you. I love you.”

He reaches up and takes my wrists, removing them from his face. “You need to go, Emalie. I’m done here. It’s too hard.”

“No, you’re doing it because you’re trying to protect me and I get that, but you can’t—”

“Can’t what?” he bellows, leaping up. “Protect you? Well too fucking bad. Until this is done, I don’t want to see you. If that means I lose you then fine, but you need to go, you need to stop calling me, and you need to leave me the fuck alone.”

“Rainer,” I whisper, hurt rising in my chest.

He steps forward looking into my eyes, his expression fierce. “Emalie, you need to do this for me.”

“But I love you and . . .” My voice trails off.

He cups my face. “And I love you, okay? Fucking so hard. That’s why you have to leave. Let me go. Don’t call. Don’t try and see me. If you love me, you’ll do that for me.”

“Rainer, I’m scared. I don’t want to lose you.”

“Then the best thing you can do for me is go.”

“Please,” I whisper.

He leans down, pressing a kiss to my lips. Then he steps back and looks into my eyes. “I’m giving you a choice. Go and let me deal with this, or stay and watch me walk away.”

“Rainer . . .”

“I’m not waiting for you to make up your mind.”

“I don’t want to lose you!” I cry.

“Then walk out that door.”

I step back, my hands shaking. He meets my eyes and I can see he’s serious, dead serious. Tears tumble down my cheeks as I take in the eyes of the man I love. He’s beautiful, and I want him to stay that way, but if me being in his life right now is putting him in danger, then I’ll do what he says. I’ll walk away.

“I love you,” I whisper.

“I love you too, kid.”

Then I step forward, kissing his lips softly before turning and walking out the door.

My heart is breaking.

~*~*~*~

I
t’s been twelve days.

He’s not back.

He hasn’t been to the house, he hasn’t called—he has just disappeared. He asked me to stay away, to not call him, but today I tried. His phone is disconnected. Unable to take it anymore, I call the police. They went around to his house, but found nothing. They said unless they had solid evidence, they couldn’t track him. As far as they are concerned, he’s just a young boy who has run off.

Rainer wouldn’t do that to me.

He wouldn’t just leave.

Would he?

~*~*~*~

T
wenty-one days.

It feels so long.

I barely get out of bed most days. I just stare out my window, waiting for him to return. I go over our last conversation in my mind, and all it does is bring pain to my heart. The bracelet hanging around my wrist is the only thing I have left of him. I don’t eat. I don’t sleep. I’m barely hanging on. My parents are worried, but not enough to do anything about it. It’s just a broken heart, they say. She’ll get over it, they say.

I’ll never get over Rainer Torrence.

Not until the day I die.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

NOW – MALI

I press the cool ice to my eye and sigh as I find instant relief. It’s starting to bruise up now. I didn’t realize I had done so much damage falling. I mean, sure, it hurt but I didn’t know it was going to bruise up like this. It was worth it, though; that was the best sex I’ve ever had. Though since Rainer ran out after Pippa, I haven’t seen or heard from him.

It’s past midnight now, and my heart is a little broken. I want him to need me more than he needs her, but part of me is just realizing that’s not going to happen. I can’t hate him for loving her. I can’t hate her for caring about him, but she has a boyfriend she loves, and she made that choice, yet she’s not willing to give Rainer his choice. I don’t understand that, but then I don’t understand the bond they shared, so how can I judge?

“Hey,” Mimi says, stepping into my room, still in her work uniform.

“Hey Mimi.” I smile.

“What happened to your face?”

“Sex injury.”

Her eyes widen and then she giggles. “I don’t even want to know.”

“No, you probably don’t.”

“Where’s Rainer?”

I look away and she immediately comes over and sits beside me. “Honey?”

“Pippa got jealous and he ran out after her.”

“After he gave you a black eye?”

I scowl at her. “He didn’t, I did.”

“Still . . .”

I get her point, but I wave a hand anyway, trying to brush it off.

“They’re friends . . .”

“Honey,” she says gently.

“I don’t know what to do, Mimi.” I sigh, dropping my head. “How can I be angry at him when he’s been so honest with me?”

“You don’t need to be angry at him, but honey, you deserve more than being second best.”

“I love him.”

She sighs. “And you deserve to be loved back by him.”

“What am I supposed to do? Demand he chooses?”

She shrugs. “Maybe.”

“I can’t do that and you know it.”

“Why not?” she prompts. “Why can’t you ask him to choose? You’re not asking him to stop being her friend, but you deserve to be first in his eyes.”

“I don’t know,” I whisper.

“Look at me!” she demands and I lift my head, meeting her gaze. “Don’t let me see you doubting yourself, Emalie. You deserve to be first, and I understand that he can’t just switch off his feelings, but this is his issue, it isn’t yours. You need to lay down where you stand and let him decide what it is he wants to do about it.”

“I know.” I sigh. “But I just got him back, and the idea of losing him again scares me.”

“Maybe, but wouldn’t you rather lose him than to stick around wondering if you’re second?”

She’s right. I know she’s right.

And that just hurts more.

~*~*~*~

“H
ey.”

I look up from the spot on my bed to see Rainer standing at my door. He’s wearing a pair of jeans and a hoodie; he looks dangerous and sexy. My heart aches and I honestly don’t know if I can just let him go. When I look at him, I know he’s in my heart, and I can’t just forget that. Even if he didn’t choose me, could I just walk away?