If You Love Me (4 page)

“Hello,
Ross. What brings you back to Indy after all this time?” Amy asked in an
attempt to spare Ashley from having to speak.

“I thought
it was about time I came back for a visit. Ashley, it’s good to see you, babe.”

“Hello,
Ross,” Ashley replied in a low voice.

“Mind if I
sit?” he asked.

“Suit
yourself,” Ashley replied. She allowed her gaze to wander over his magnificent
features. Still muscled and tanned with hair bleached by the sun, she had to
wonder where he’d been spending his time and with whom.

They
engaged in small talk, catching up on the happenings around town until the band
started to play. When a slow song began, Ross looked over at Ashley. “Dance
with me, babe?”

Ashley
shrugged. “I guess one dance won’t hurt anything.” She wanted to know where
he’d been since he’d walked out on her. A dance would give her a chance to find
out without Amy, or anyone else, listening to the conversation.

As they
walked onto the dance floor and he took her in his arms. “How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been
fine, Ross. How about you? Where’ve you been hiding all this time?”

He pulled
her closer. “I haven’t been hiding anywhere, babe. I’ve been in Florida,
surfing and soaking up the sun, running a surf shop on the beach. My kind of
life, you know. The old nine-to-five just ain’t my thing.”

“How well
I know,” she replied.

“I guess
you’re still sitting at a computer every day, crunching numbers? I don’t know
how you do it.”

“I enjoy
my work. I always have.”

“I hear
rumblings about trouble in paradise, babe. I know you didn’t waste any time
finding a guy to settle down with after I left. Has to make me wonder if it was
me you wanted back then or just any guy to marry.”

“I wanted
you
back then, Ross. But when you made
your feelings quite clear that you didn’t want a life with me, I moved on. I
met a wonderful man and we got married because we
both
wanted to.”

“Ah, but I
guess you found out I was right about the whole marriage thing after all, huh?
I mean…I heard you and Mr. Wonderful split. The whole happily-ever-after thing
isn’t what it’s cracked up to be, is it?”

“Contrary
to any rumors you may have heard, my husband and I have not split. We had some
issues but it’s all going to work out.”

“Ever the
optimist, aren’t you? I think you should just shuck the whole crazy idea of
staying married, leave the boring desk job, and come to Florida with me. We
could have the life, babe, living on the beach, doing what we want when we
want. You could help me run the surf shop.”

“Maybe
that’s not what I want, Ross. You always seem to forget about what I want. It’s
always been about what you want.”

He leaned
his face close to hers and as the song ended, he kissed her. “Tell me that
didn’t spark something.”

She stood
in the middle of the dance floor and glared at him. “Don’t you ever do that
again, Ross Canter. I’m a married woman. I don’t go around kissing random guys
on the dance floor.”

“I don’t
think you’re as married as you say you are and I don’t think I’m exactly a random
guy.”

She walked
off in a huff. When she got to the table, she picked up her purse. “Take me
home, now, or I’m calling a cab.”

“Okay,
okay, don’t get your panties in a wad. I’ll take you. ” Amy got up and walked
out with an angry Ashley.

Ross
chuckled. “Bye, girls, I’ll be seeing you around.”

“Don’t
count on it,” Ashley hissed in reply.

 
“What the hell happened in there?” Amy asked
when they got to the car.

“That…that
jerk…heard that Adam and I split and he made a move on me.”

“He made a
move on you? Are you kidding me?”

“No, I’m
not kidding. He asked me to go to Florida with him and be a beach bum. And he
had the audacity to kiss me on the dance floor. What an ass.”

“He’s
still interested after all this time? He’s having regrets for leaving you?”

“He thinks
he’s having the last laugh about the whole marriage issue. He actually thought
I’d admit I made a mistake and go back to being his lover, no strings
attached.”

“Oh,
Ashley, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s
okay. I’m so over him it’s not funny. I know who I want and it’s damn sure not
Ross Canter.”

“You need
to call Adam.”

“I…want
to…I just can’t,” Ashley replied tearfully.

 
“Do you want me to come in with you?” Amy
asked when they arrived at Ashley’s house.

“No, I
just need to be alone. I may try and call Adam…I don’t know.”

“Call him,
Ashley. You need to make things right with him before Ross causes problems.”

“I know. I
just don’t know why Ross had to come back to town.

“Call if
you need to talk.”

“Thanks,
Amy.”

Ashley
unlocked her front door and went inside. The house was quiet and empty as it
had been for the past week. She sighed as she kicked off her shoes and walked
toward the bedroom. After she’d undressed and settled under the blankets, she
looked at Adam’s pillow. The bed seemed huge without him in it. She picked up
her cell and dialed his number. It immediately went to voicemail.

“Adam,
it’s Ashley. Please call me. We…need to talk,” she said as she left a message
for him.

Staying
awake and watching a movie, Ashley waited hopefully for him to return her call.
She finally gave up shortly after midnight. She turned off the television set
and turned out the light on the table next to her bed. Rolling over, she
allowed the tears to flow once more.
Oh,
Adam, I need you so much.

Chapter
Five

Adam
walked into the club with Dillon and looked around as his eyes adjusted to the
light. “I can’t believe I let you talk me into this, little bro,” he said as
they grabbed a table and ordered a couple of beers.

“It beats
sitting at home listening to you moan and bitch about your wife,” Dillon
replied sarcastically. “Really, man, if you miss her that much, why don’t you
just call her?”

“I told
her I’d give her some space. I can’t call begging her to take me back. She has
to make a choice, Dillon. I told you that.”

“What makes
you so doggone sure there’s a choice to make?”

“Since
when are you on her side?” Adam asked as he took a swig of his beer.

“Since I
saw the two of you together, making it work, that’s when. What the hell
happened to you guys?”

“I don’t
know, I really don’t know. Things were great until a few months ago. She
started bitching about the stupidest things. We’d argue and fight but we always
had fun making up. I guess I was partly to blame. I was in a funk, things were
crazy at work, and I took it out on her. Then there was the baby thing. We
talked about having a baby but when things got bad, I got the feeling she
really didn’t want to have a kid with me. That’s when I began to think she
never really got over her ex, the one who ran out on her.”

“Do you
really believe that? Because the Ashley I’ve gotten to know was head over heels
in love with you or so it seemed.”

“I had
hoped she was, but now I just don’t know.” Adam took another drink of his beer
and looked toward the dance floor. He froze as his worst nightmare became a
glaring reality.

“What’s
wrong with you? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Dillon said, following his
brother’s gaze.

“Well,
I’ll be a son-of-a-bitch, I was right all along. Didn’t take her long to find
the asshole and get him back to town.”

“They look
pretty cozy, I’ll have to admit. I’m so sorry, bro. I just didn’t believe
Ashley could do this to you. Not the Ashley I know.”

“I guess
she had us both fooled. Oh…my God, get me the hell out of here before I do
something I’ll regret.”

Dillon
looked at the couple on the dance floor again and saw the man lean down to kiss
the woman. He stood up and said, “Come on, Adam. I don’t feel like going to
jail tonight. Let’s go home.”

Adam
stumbled to the parking lot. When he reached the car, he leaned his head down.
“I’m going to be sick.”

“I’m
sorry, bro, I had no idea they would be here tonight. Are you okay to get in
the truck and go home now?”

“Let’s get
the hell out of here.”

Dillon
drove his brother back to his place hurriedly. When they were inside, he sat
Adam down on the couch.

“Damn it,
Dillon. I’ve lost her to that no good bastard.”

“I thought
Ashley was smarter than that. I really did. I know I gave you guys a hard time
at first, but I had really grown to like having her in the family. What are you
going to do? Are you going to talk to her?”

“No, it’s
too late for that. I can’t bear to hear her tell me it’s over. I’ll see a
lawyer Monday and start the paperwork. I said I wouldn’t stand in her way and
that’s a promise I’ll keep.”

“Adam,
fight for your wife, man. You can’t give up like this,” Dillon urged.

“I gave
her the freedom to find him. I’d hoped she wouldn’t take me up on it, but I saw
with my own eyes tonight, that’s what she wants. I have to let her go. It’s
killing me, but I’ll survive.”
Somehow.

“Adam,
you’re making the biggest mistake of your life if you don’t tell her how you
feel. You don’t know but what she might choose you.”

“Dillon,
wake up and smell the coffee. My wife was on the dance floor kissing another
man tonight. Does that sound like she wants to work it out with me?”

“If she
was my woman, I’d damn sure tell her what I thought about that little
scenario.”

“But she’s
not your woman. Apparently, she isn’t mine anymore, either.” Adam stood up.
“I’m going to bed.”

“If you
need to talk, you know where I am.”

“Goodnight.”

Adam went
to his room. As he took his phone out of his pocket, he noticed he had a
voicemail. He listened to Ashley’s message and sighed. “Well, baby, I’m going
to make it easy on you. You don’t have to tell me…”

He spent
the weekend wallowing in self-pity. On Monday morning he called an attorney to
make an appointment and had the papers drawn up to end his marriage. Adam told
the lawyer to give her anything she wanted.
I’m
doing this for you, baby. I love you and I only want you to be happy.

He knew
the papers would be delivered to her office the following day. Resigning
himself to the fact his marriage was over, he went to work and attempted to start
to move on with his life.

Dillon
kept quiet when he told him what he’d done, but Adam knew he didn’t agree.

“Dillon,
don’t say anything. I know you say you’d handle things differently but until it
happens to you, you really don’t know what you’d do. You’ve never been in love.
When you love someone the way I love Ash, you do whatever you can to make them
happy, even if it means giving them the freedom to move on with someone else.”

“I don’t
agree but it’s your life. I’m going to order a pizza.” Dillon walked away,
leaving his older brother staring at the wall.

****

The next
afternoon, Ashley was sitting at her desk when a messenger arrived in the
reception area.

“Ashley,
there’s a delivery for you. Can you come up front?” the receptionist asked.

“Okay,
I’ll be right there.” Ashley hung up the phone and walked to the reception area
where a young man held a manila envelope.

 
“Good day, Mrs. Brant, you’ve been served.”

“What…did
you say?” she stammered.

The messenger
walked out of the building, leaving a stunned Ashley in his wake. “What do you
suppose he meant by that?”

“You’d
better open the envelope and find out,” the receptionist offered.

Ashley
opened the envelope, took out the papers, and began to read. “Oh, no, Adam. What
are you doing?”

“Bad
news?”

Ashley’s
face was pasty white and her hands shaking as she walked to her office without
answering.

She sat at
her desk and began to cry when a few minutes later there was a knock on the
door and her boss, Braydon, poked his head in.

“May I
come in?”

 
“Yes.”

“What’s
going on? Carrie said you got served with some papers and ran in here looking
as if you’d seen a ghost.”

 
“Adam has filed for divorce.”

“Adam?
You? Divorce? Is this some sort of joke?”

“I’m
afraid not. He moved out a few weeks ago. We’ve…been…we haven’t been getting
along but I wasn’t prepared for this. We haven’t talked since he left.”