In the Lyrics (12 page)

“
My days seem a little brighter, my dreams a little sweeter
…” she sings as she hits the song’s chorus.

The small crowd starts to clap their hands as she finishes the last word and sets her guitar down.

“That a girl,” I whisper into her ear as I lean over the back of the chair. A smile creeps its way across her face. It makes my heart beat a little faster knowing that I am the reason she is jubilant.

“Hey! What are you doing here?” She turns in her chair and looks surprised to see me.

“My shift was over so I decided to make an appearance. That’s okay, isn’t it?”

“Absolutely…I mean, yeah, sure. At least now there’s at least someone here I like, other than Dusty, and Lord knows where he ran off to.”

“So you like me, do ya?” I wiggle my eyebrows in a playful manner.

“You wish. You know what I mean,” she laughs and the sound is so pure and innocent, I commit it to memory.

Turning my head, I take a quick glance at the people here. Most look like college kids, around our age, and they all look a little, I don’t know, too preppy. Sort of like their parents buy them camo, but they’ve never actually picked up a bow and shot anything before, if you catch my drift. “Yeah, I know what you mean. Well, don’t let them ruin your night. Let’s have fun.” She gives a wary smile. “Come on, I have something to show you.” I hold my hand out to her. She is hesitant at first, but she grabs it as she catches a glance of my best pouty face. It sucks, but she buys it. Pulling her up from the chair, I lead her towards a small pond I noticed as I was driving in. My hand twitches to reach out and grab her as I keep it clenched at my side. We’re still walking a fine line, and I don’t want to overstep my boundaries. It’s a hard thing to balance when your mind and heart are pulling you in two separate directions, especially when you don’t know how the girl you’re diggin’ is feeling.

It only takes a few minutes to get to the tiny secluded pond, and when we do, the little walk is worth it. There is a picnic table perched on the edge of the water right before it drops off into a swampy cat-tailed area. You can tell the trees have all been cleared out around it recently and you can see the moon clearly as it hangs over the night’s sky. This is what first dates should be made of, except this isn’t a date, but if it were, you better believe I’d get an A plus for it. The only thing more beautiful is the sight standing beside me.

“It’s beautiful,” she whispers as she bends to take a seat on the old picnic table. I notice her shorts rise up a little bit to accommodate her movement.

Looking up into her eyes, I say, “Yeah, it is.” My words have more than one meaning. Honestly, Hensley is the most striking woman I’ve ever met. Now that we’ve been around one another longer than a few days, I can see the real Hensley. And I know her badass attitude is all a front. It’s like she uses it as a mask to keep people away. She’s scared of getting close to anyone, well, anyone except for Dusty and the waste of air that is Logan. I feel her acting that way towards me. At first she was a royal brat, to put it mildly, but now I can see her fighting those feelings. Sometimes I can tell she wants to pop off and start throwing rude comments around, but she’s stopped for the most part. Refraining from doing so means more to me than I can even explain. It means she’s slowly stopped trying to push me away. Hopefully she’ll realize how much I like her, and hopefully soon she’ll realize she harbors those same feelings towards me.

“Thanks for coming out tonight. I really do appreciate it. Dusty is…” she looks back to the crowd of people huddled around the fire’s flames. “Well, honestly, like I said before, I have no clue where he is,” she giggles and the sweet sound makes my heart skip a beat.

Scooting down next to her on the bench, I reach my arm around her back. It’s a bold move. I know that, I just can’t help myself any longer. I need to be near her. “You’re welcome, Sunshine.”

Reminding me she can go from sweet to salty in a nanosecond, she snaps, “It’s dark outside.”

Ignoring her rude remark, I smile, “My life is always bright when you’re around.”

“There you go, being all goofy and cheesy all the darn time. Do you even have a serious bone in your sexy body?” As soon as she realizes the words that left her mouth, I can tell she let them slip. Her face reddens under the moon’s light and she looks away. Her embarrassment gives me a little insight into her. If she doesn’t like me, at least I know she thinks I look good.

“I’m always serious. You bring out the goofy in me.” She does. I can feel myself letting go of the pain I’ve harbored since losing my brother. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll never forget about him, but slowly Hensley is healing me. Whether she knows it or not, her presence is helping. She keeps my mind occupied, leaving only time to think about the future, not dwell on the past.

“Colby, I have something I need to tell you. I…” She turns towards me in a sensual slow movement that causes every hair on my body to rise. If I had a magic remote to freeze time, you could bet your bottom dollar I’d be pressing that pause button right now. There’s something about the genuine look on her face as she turns towards me, or maybe it’s the feeling that my heart is literally begging to be hers, but I feel…I don’t know, maybe she feels the same way towards me. Her eyes are talking; I just don’t clearly understand what they’re trying to say.

The sounds of grass crunching under the feet of someone approaching stop Hensley mid-sentence. “Colby! There you are!” Brittani’s screeching voice interrupts her. Huffing, I shake my head and glance backwards, only to see Brittani sauntering towards the picnic table in nothing but a little bikini, brown riding chaps, and boots. Leave it to her to think she can rock it, when in reality, no one should ever wear that. She doesn’t look sexy; she looks like a girl who’s begging to get laid – which is not even remotely attractive. Maybe it is to some of the dudes down at the party, but not me.

I can feel Hensley move away from my embrace, and as soon as she does, I ache for her touch. She leans in close and quietly says, “I can, umm, see that you have someone eager to have your attention. I’m gonna grab a drink.”

Grabbing her arm, I attempt to hold her just long enough to plead, “Wait,” but she wiggles out of my grasp and then walks away, leaving me angry at Brittani for disturbing us.

I wonder what she was going to say.

Brittani must have noticed my facial expression as she walks closer to me. My mouth opens to tell her to please go…I’d love to tell her to go to hell, but my momma would have a cow if she ever heard me talk to a lady like that.

“Stop. Don’t say a word. This is important. Just listen,” she rambles grabbing my attention. What could be so important that she just pranced all the way out here and interrupted Hensley and me?

Nothing.

“If you’re sad about her leaving, let me fill that void, baby.” She takes a step closer and before I have time to react she straddles my lap. Her small top barely covers her nipples. Noticing it a second too late, she runs her chest against mine. Taking her hand, she grabs my face and tilts my head to the side. I can feel her hot breath on my earlobe as she whispers, “She’s just a girl, Colby, and I’m all woman. Trust me. You’d enjoy this much more than that. Rumor has it, she’s a virgin. I know how to please you, so let me please you. Plus her mom is a skank. I’m obviously the better choice here.”

My head jerks around quickly as I grab her sides and prepare to pick her up off of my lap. As soon as I start to inch her body off of mine, she hastily leans forward and fills my mouth with her tongue.

I’d never willingly be disrespectful to a lady, but Brittani isn’t a lady. Pushing her off of my lap, she almost falls on her ass. “What the fuck was that?” I shout as my hands fly up to my wet lips and wipe them off, making sure there is no evidence of her presence on my mouth.

“Don’t lie to yourself; you want me just as much as I want you. It’s that fucking little piece of trash that has you blinded. You’ll see it one day, and I’ll be here, with open arms, waiting.” She stands up and dusts herself off and then places her manicured hand on my chest. “Because that was just a sample of what I can do with my tongue!”

I TOLD MYSELF tonight was the night. We couldn’t keep dancing around one another, fighting these feelings we both have. At first I chalked it up to him being a gentleman, opening doors for me, the innocent way he held his hand at the small of my back as he ushered me to walk in front of him. Dusty would give me a sly wink, but I refused to listen to my heart. The more time that we spent around each other, the more I felt myself starting to crave being around him. I’ve never believed in that whole love at first sight, mushy type stuff, but whatever is going on between us started when our eyes locked that first night a few weeks ago.

My mom would be furious; I can picture her face now scolding me for letting my guard down, for letting someone in. But I’m so sick of denying myself a happy life. I’m slowly suffocating from the loneliness that has been my existence. I want someone, other than Dusty, to hold me at night. I want to feel cherished and beautiful. The strange part is that Colby’s made me feel all of those things from day one. I was just too blind to see it isn’t a front, that he is actually a good guy. Gradually, I’ve started to fall. So tonight I decided I would tell him how I felt. Maybe once I say it out loud, the feeling in my gut won’t scare me so much.

The last I heard, he wasn’t going to make it, and then Dusty told me he was going to try like hell. I knew then I wouldn’t let anything stop me from telling him I like him, but leave it to Brittani to ruin the moment. Doing what I do best, I avoided the confrontation. Arguing with her is like arguing with a child. You never win. As much as I love trying to put that bitch in her place…

Casually, I get up and try to act like I’m thirsty. As I walk away I do everything in my power to hold in the vomit that begins to rise in my throat. The burning sensation that accompanies it almost gags me as my feet carry me forward. For some fucking reason, I turn around, regretting it almost immediately. The sight of Brittani’s mouth colliding with his will forever be burned into my mind. Tears beg to be released, but I won’t do it, holding them at bay. I refuse to cry for someone I never had. He’s never been mine, as much as I’ve dreamt about him calling me his girlfriend, he never did and he never will. Maybe this is God’s way of proving to me I shouldn’t be with him, that I should be alone and focus on myself and my career.

Marching back towards the crowd, I see Logan sitting on the back of his truck, beer in one hand, some barely clothed female in the other. I’ve never been to a party, before tonight, so I might as well live it up while the night is young and he’s just the guy to help me. Knowing that it will piss Colby off doesn’t hurt either. I’ve never been so into someone, and had to deal with all of these emotions, especially jealous ones. And it had to be Brittani of all people he was kissing.

“Logan, I need a beer!” I holler as I near him. Needing something to take the edge off, I turn to alcohol, just like my father. He glances up and smiles a wicked smile. He must see that I’m on a mission. If he means a mission to get drunk for the first time in my life, then yeah, I’m on a mission for sure. I know nothing good will come out of this – I’m not naïve – but I can’t help but want to drown out the image of that bitch sitting on top of him.

“Wild Hensley has made her presence, friends. This party just got real. Welcome to the real world, Hens!” Smirking, he bends and opens a small red and white cooler, and brings out a cold beer. Popping the cap, he reaches out and hands it to me. Taking it from him, I glance at the girl at his side. I’ve never seen her before.

“Hensley, this is Marcy. Marcy, this is my friend, Hensley.” The chick I now know as Marcy stands up on her tiptoes and kisses Logan on his cheek. She is no doubt marking her territory. Little does she know Logan doesn’t pique my interest at all. No one does anymore.

“Marcy, why don’t you give me and my friend some alone time?” He lets go of her waist and shoos her away with his hand. Taking a sip of my beer, the taste is the foulest, most disgusting taste in the entire world, but I swallow knowing it will help blur these edges, and this is probably all he has in his cooler.

The girl whines, but walks away, leaving me and Logan alone. He reaches for my hand and pulls me up on the tailgate with him.

“I’m really glad you decided to come out. I wanted to apologize for how I acted before. I was just, I don’t know, a little jealous of Colby. You know how I feel about you, and sometimes I just lose my cool. I wouldn’t have hit you, ya know? I couldn’t ever lay a finger on something as precious as you. And I can see now that Colby has his hands full,” he says, catching my attention. I follow his eyeline and see Brittani and Colby standing up talking by the picnic table, their bodies too close for comfort, and I take another draw from my bottle.