Ink & Flowers (3 page)

"Why are you doing this?"

"I'm trying to help you out!"

"No, you're not," said Luke. If he was going to do this, he wasn't going to put up with any false pretenses.  "You're using me."

Cooper's patience seemed to run out. He smiled, his eyes were dark and humourless now. "Yeah, you caught me. I just think you're cute, and I'd love to take all that innocence away."

Luke's breath hitched in his throat, and hot tears formed in his eyes.

"Fucking hell," said Cooper. "Whatever, I'm done with this game, I'm leaving." He stood, and headed towards the door.

"No, wait," said Luke, panic clear in his voice. He'd decided now, and the relief was already spreading through his body, even as he tried to resist it. He didn't want to lose his chance.

Cooper turned back, clearly exasperated.

"I'll do it," said Luke. "Yeah, I'll ... I'll do it."

Cooper gave a short little sigh, and raised his eyebrows. "All right," he said finally. He sauntered back to the table, but he didn't sit down. "You free tomorrow?"

"Yeah. I have the weekend off."

"Me too." Cooper pulled out his phone. "Address?"

Luke told him, struggling to keep his tears back. He wouldn't have to get another job. He didn't have to live with his aunts. At that thought, relief washed over him,  the moment was strong enough to replace the horror of what he was agreeing to.

"I'll be there at noon tomorrow," announced Cooper. "Hey, I hope you don't have too much stuff, my apartment's not very big."

"No," Luke shook his head. "I don't."

"Well, good." For a moment, Cooper seemed awkward. His phone back in his pocket, he glanced around the diner and balanced on the balls of his feet. "Okay then, see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, see you tomorrow."

Cooper left, and Luke realised that he had never finished his burger.

*~*~*

He was done packing by the time his buzzer sounded, a few minutes after noon. The studio was small and had been furnished when he rented it. Most of his stuff was still in boxes at his aunts'. He hadn't missed it in the past year, and not having to see his aunts was a much more appealing thought than reuniting with his childhood trinkets. He wondered when they would find out that he was living with a man. He wondered if they'd be surprised, or just disappointed. They'd always talked about how he was too timid and effeminate. They’d probably assumed it was inevitable.

The buzzer rang again, longer this time, and Luke jumped up to catch it. "Come in!" he squeaked, buzzing Cooper up without giving him a chance to speak.

He flitted around the apartment a bit, trying to figure out how he was supposed to act with Cooper. Grateful? Friendly? Romantic? His stomach churned. No, this wasn't that kind of relationship. It was a business deal. He'd act cold and professional.

There was a curt knock on the door, and Luke went to get it, his heart pounding. Something in that knock frightened him in a very familiar way, but there was no time to examine it before he opened the door to reveal his landlord.

"Um ... Rajesh," Luke whimpered as Rajesh stepped past him into the suite, his terrifying presence belying his small stature.

"Packing?" he said, looking around. "Are you going somewhere, Luke?"

"I'm moving ..." said Luke warily. "There was a notice on the door ..."

"Mmhm." Rajesh finished his intense examination of the room and turned back to Luke. "And when can I expect to have my rent by?"

"Well, I—"

"Because surely you didn't think that you suddenly leaving would somehow cancel out the amount that you owe me."

"I didn't." Luke shook his head, words failing him. He had completely forgotten about paying the money he owed. "I just—I mean, I was going to—"

"Am I interrupting something?" The voice came from the still open doorway, and Luke turned to see Cooper standing there.

"No," squeaked Luke.

"Yes, actually, you are," Rajesh contradicted. "And who are you?"

Cooper leaned against the doorway and made a noise with his tongue in his cheek. "I'm here to pick up Luke." He glanced at Luke. "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine," said Luke.

"You have my money, then?" said Rajesh, turning away from Cooper distastefully.

"Not yet," Luke managed to expel.

Rajesh raised his eyebrows. "Not yet," he repeated, his tone thick with sarcasm.

"How much does he owe you?" Cooper walked towards them, reaching into his back pocket.

"No, Cooper," gasped Luke, "Don't."

"Nine hundred," said Rajesh. "Why, are you his lawyer?"

"Nope." Cooper pulled a check out of his wallet. "Got a pen, Luke?"

"No."

Cooper glanced up at him. "No, you don't have a pen? I thought you were an artist."

"No, I mean ... Cooper, you can't do this."

"I don't care who pays me," said Rajesh impatiently.

"I ..." Luke stared at Cooper's face, that never-changing expression of extreme nonchalance. "I'll pay you back."

"Yeah, I know," said Cooper. "Pen?"

Luke went and got him one, and Cooper wrote Rajesh a cheque with a quick, sure hand. "There you go, nine hundred." He crossed his arms, his large, intimidating presence suddenly more obvious. "I should get a receipt for that, yeah?"

"Of course, yes, I'll write you one."

Wordlessly, Luke fetched some paper for Rajesh, and he wrote a makeshift receipt.

"So there won't be any more problems, then?" said Cooper, his tone sounding less like a question and more like a threat.

Rajesh left quite quickly.

"I—I don't know what to say," said Luke, although Cooper was already getting to work on the boxes. "I can't pay you back."

"Sure you can," said Cooper, grunting as he lifted a box. "We'll get creative. Fuck, what's in here, rocks?"

"Art supplies," said Luke, his voice dead as he tried not to think of what creative methods of payment Cooper was thinking of. He wished that he was more scared. He was, in a sort of intellectual sense. Because he knew that he should be. Cooper was huge, and brutish, and he could probably hurt Luke quite badly, especially if Luke didn't hold up his end of the bargain. And he was scared of the guilt that festered in his stomach when he thought of Cooper, scared that it would begin overcoming him,  perhaps to the point of driving him insane. He was afraid of the person he might become if he kept on like this. And he was worried that his aunts would find out, of course. He was always worried about that.

But he was also excited. Horribly, evilly excited in the way he had been when he had defied his aunts and signed up for art school against their wishes. And he was excited in a way that tied into his guilt in such a complex way that he could barely differentiate them. The thought of what Cooper wanted to do to him, what he had agreed to do with Cooper was repulsive, a disgusting ache all through his body, especially ... Oh god, what was wrong with him?

"
What
is
your problem?" asked Cooper, echoing Luke's sentiments. "Seriously, if you're a whack-job, you should warn me
before
we move in together."

"I'm not a
whack-job
," snapped Luke, feeling more than a little defensive. "Why would you say that?"

"Just you get this crazy look on your face sometimes," Cooper spun his finger around his temple.

"It's called thinking," sputtered Luke. "Please stop insulting me."

Cooper shook his head. "Yeah, you're right, I'm the crazy one." He grunted and lifted another box. "Well, come on, I'm not your personal mover."

*~*~*

It only took a few trips to get all of Luke's things down to Cooper's truck. Luke could only lift one or two boxes at a time while Cooper toted three or more with ease. Cooper's vehicle wasn't in any way surprising to Luke, although he'd never seen Cooper drive to the flower shop. It was a huge black pick-up with hideous purple flame decals on the sides.

"You like it?" Cooper patted the hood. He had obviously noticed Luke's distasteful expression. "She's my baby."

"It's a girl?" Luke scoffed.

"I call her Sandra," replied Cooper with a grin.

The interior smelled like cigarettes. Luke sat awkwardly on the tan leather seats, his legs pressed together and his back held stiff away from the seat. Cooper glanced at him as he got in and chuckled. The loud roar of the truck starting up was immediately drowned out by a loud, offensive rap song.

"Ah, that's shit ..." said Cooper, diving for the controls. He switched it to a rock station and turned the volume to a lower setting, laughing at Luke's expression. "You are a
tight-ass
, you know that?"

 "I didn't do anything! Are you just going to be insulting me like this the whole time?"

"Hey, who said it was an insult?"

"I—" Luke shut his mouth suddenly as he realised what Cooper was insinuating.

The smell of cigarettes was sharp and overwhelming. He rolled the window down and crossed his arms, staring determinedly away from Cooper.

They drove in silence for a while. It was a warm autumn day, and the air smelled like sunlight still. The heavy crackle of the rock song on the radio was strangely calming, and Luke felt himself relaxing against the seat a little. Everything was terrifying, and stressful and wrong, but if just for a moment, he could forget it all, let go of his anxiety—this moment was okay.

"You Chinese?" asked Cooper suddenly, after they had been sitting at a stoplight for a while.

"Mmhm." Luke nodded.

"Speak Mandarin at all?"

"Cantonese, a bit."

"Really?"

Luke glanced at Cooper, confused by the sudden interest in his voice. "Yeah, why?"

Cooper made a carefully casual expression and shook his head. "No reason, I just ..." He paused to glance at the streetlights and accelerated. "Yeah, nothing."

"My grandparents were from Hong Kong," said Luke. "And my dad moved here from Taiwan before I was born."

"You got grandparents in Taiwan?"

"Yeah, I’ve never met them though." He'd never heard from them, and if his aunts were right, they probably resented Luke and his mother for taking their son away from them.

"You ever been to China?" asked Cooper, and Luke shook his head. "You want to go?"

"Not really. I don't even speak Mandarin."

"What's the difference, exactly?"

"I don't know." Luke could feel a bit of annoyance tingeing his voice. "They're just different languages."

Cooper drummed the steering wheel. "Okay, just asking. Am I being racist or something?"

Luke shook his head and looked back out the window. "Just get asked questions like that a lot."

"Like you're an expert on the subject, eh?"

"Yeah, I guess."

They were downtown, and Luke was surprised when they pulled into a parkade next to an upscale Japanese restaurant and a salon.

"You live here?" he asked as they drove up several levels, the truck bouncing precariously over the speed bumps.

"Yeah, there are condos up top."

"You rent one?"

"Nope."

"You own a condo?"

They parked, and Cooper jumped out of the truck, Luke followed warily behind him.

"Yeah, why not?" Cooper pulled down the tailgate and slid the boxes forward. He didn't look at Luke.

"What do you do?" Luke hovered, unsure of how to help with the boxes. "Like, for a job?" God, he didn't know anything about Cooper. He was probably a pimp!

Cooper cleared his throat. "You know, stuff. Just whatever’s available. I'm dry-walling right now."

"And that's really lucrative, is it?"

"
Lucrative,
" repeated Cooper as if it was the first time he had ever said the word. He shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. Catch!"

He lobbed a box at Luke, who nearly fumbled it. "Careful!"

"Relax." Cooper sauntered past Luke with a box, and then, quickly and casually, as if it were completely normal, reached a hand down and slid it over Luke's backside.

Luke gasped, feeling blood rush to his face. He stared at Cooper for a moment with a purposely shocked and disgusted expression, hoping he would see it and feel bad, but Cooper was already heading away from him towards the door.

"Hey genius, come hold the elevator!" He called, and Luke realised that he had been standing by the truck, frozen.

*~*~*

Luke's fingers shook under the weight of the box he was carrying as they made their way up to Cooper's condo. He wondered how many hours he had left before he had to do
it.
He wondered if he could still back out, if he should. The reality of what was happening hit him suddenly, and he nearly collapsed. What was he
doing?
Why on earth was he willing to live with a strange man, to have sex with him, just to avoid his aunts?

"I need to sit down," Luke gasped as soon as Cooper opened the door, and he charged into the apartment, dumping the box on the floor and collapsing onto the luckily close-by couch.

"Make yourself at home," said Cooper as Luke bent double to hold his head between his knees. "What's up, you sick or something?"

"No ..." mumbled Luke, "I just ... I can't believe I'm doing this."

Cooper didn't say anything, and Luke thought he had left, until he sat up and saw that Cooper was standing in the doorway, watching him with his arms folded across his chest. "Yeah, well, you do seem pretty desperate. Or you don't think it's as bad of a deal as you're telling yourself."

"What are you saying?" asked Luke, turning around to glare at Cooper. "You're saying I want to do this? I don't. I don't have any choice."

"Right," said Cooper with a smug little smile. He turned away and disappeared down the hallway.

Luke sighed angrily, flopped back against the couch and looked around. Cooper's apartment
was
small, and messy, but it was also very nice. The wall opposite him was red brick, the others a pale cream. The floor, where visible under bags, clothes, and paraphernalia, was hardwood with a red shag rug, and the furniture was black leather. The kitchen to his right was furnished with black marble counters and silver appliances, and the windows gave a spectacular view of the city. The smell of cigarettes made his head ache.