Innocence (33 page)

“Lisa, there’s no way Lucinda or her parents will keep silent once they discover your identity,” Nathaniel said.

“I believe there is.” She met his stormy gaze. “You could guarantee their silence in exchange for giving them what they want.”

“You’re being ridiculous. I can’t marry Lucinda. I love
you
.”

“Since when does love have anything to do with marriage? We both know your views on the subject, so what does it matter
whom
you marry as long as the King approves? You won’t have to leave the country, and it won’t put your position or inheritance at risk, surely a more important consideration than any personal feelings?”

“But I’ve changed my views, Lisa. You’ve changed them for me.”

She almost crumpled at the pain in his voice but continued on, determined to protect him from himself.
 

“If we marry, we will be unable to keep what has happened here a secret. You’ll not only lose everything and jeopardise the good work you and your father are committed to supporting, but both our families will be publicly shamed, our children considered illegitimate in the country of our births. My father is
alive
, Nathaniel, and he is waiting for me to come home. He has been through enough.” Her voice caught on a sob. “
Please
, let me go to him.”

“Anneliese,” Thomas interrupted, his tone gentle but insistent. “Your father won’t stand by and allow you to sacrifice yourself this way. He will demand reparations, as is his right.”

“Not if we don’t tell him what has occurred,” she said. “If you do as I ask, my father won’t have to know of my disgrace, no one will.”

“No one except for your future husband,” Nathaniel said bitterly.
 

Swallowing hard, Lisa spoke the words that would seal her fate and finish things between them forever.

“That shan’t be a problem.” She did not avert her gaze though she wanted to weep at the pain and anger in his expression. “Now that I understand the way of our world, I have decided I shall never marry. I would rather remain alone—a spinster—than be wed to a man who has no intention of honouring his vows of fidelity.”

Nathaniel flinched at her words, but he remained silent.

“Are you sure about this, Anneliese?” Thomas asked.

She briefly met his gaze, unable to say more without releasing the tears that lay just beneath the surface.

“Your plan
could
work.”

Nathaniel strode a few feet away, cursing.

“Nathaniel. Language in front of a lady.”

He spun back to face them. “Oh, Lisa’s heard cruder language than that from me, I’m afraid, and been subject to far worse. No wonder she has no desire to marry a
gentleman
.” He came to stand before her. “Your decision is final? You are determined to turn your back on us?”
 

“There is no ‘us’,” Lisa whispered. “Not anymore. I was willing to be your mistress when I believed my father was dead and there were no other choices left to me. We both know I’m not suitable to be your wife, and you have to admit, the price is too high. It’s time to let me go, Nathaniel.”

He stiffened at her declaration, his face losing all expression.

“Very well, Miss Barlow. You have my sincerest apologies for my deplorable behaviour.”

Bowing, he took her hand and lifted it to his mouth, his lips brushing her bare knuckles. The tears she had been suppressing sprang to her eyes, but she blinked them back and curtsied as she had spent years training to do, knowing full well her sweeping gesture looked ridiculous in her dowdy uniform.

“Goodbye, Lord Marsden. I wish you all the best for the future.”
 

Lisa met his gaze for the briefest of glances lest he see the anguish in hers and discern her true feelings.
 

“Are you sure about this? Truly?”

“I am,” she whispered, her words a lie.
 

Accepting her declaration with a sharp nod, Nathaniel released her hand and strode from the room.

Chapter 29

Ignorance

The door closed behind Nathaniel, and Lisa gave in to her grief and wept.
 

“Come and sit.” Thomas put an arm around her shaking shoulders and led her back to the chaise longue. “There, there. Everything will be all right. Your father is alive and awaiting your return, cause for rejoicing. Don’t take on so. We’ll find a way through this muddle.”

Sniffing back her tears, she took the lace-trimmed handkerchief he offered and dried her eyes.

“Thank you, Your Grace.”
 

“Uncle Thomas, please. Now, you must tell me the truth. Despite the fact he has behaved abominably, and at a time when I can only imagine the depths of your fear and distress, do you love my son?”

“It doesn’t matter whether I do or not,” she whispered. “I should never forgive myself if I were the instrument of Nathaniel’s downfall. Besides, I don’t want my father to know what has happened after all he has suffered. I fear the shock could kill him.”

“There is that.” Thomas sighed. “As long as you are sure
about your decision?”
 

“Very.” Lisa tried to sound confidant, her heart by no means in accord with her resolve.

The Duke studied her soberly for a long moment before his eyes fell to the pearls she had wrapped around her fingers.
 

“Your mother’s necklace. I remember how she cherished it.”

“Papa told me to bring the pearls with me when I fled. I was going to try to sell them to furnish myself with a small nest egg.”

“Thank God I arrived in time. Disposing of these would have created an easy trail for Copeland to follow.”
 

“What has happened to Lord Copeland?” Lisa was curious to know the fate of the man responsible for her pain. “How did Papa stay hidden? Why did the paper say his body had been burned beyond recognition? And what of Mr and Mrs Waters and the rest of my father’s staff? Are they well? Did they stay at Barlow Manor under Lord Copeland’s authority?”

“One question at a time.” Thomas laughed before his expression turned serious once more.

“Once your father was well enough to contact the authorities, a warrant was issued for Lord Copeland’s arrest. He is most likely languishing in the Tower of London as we speak.”
 

Lisa’s shoulders sagged with relief.
 

“He departed your father’s home quite early in the piece after fleecing it of virtually everything of value, I’m afraid, absconding to London with his ill-gotten gains.”

Lisa covered her mouth at the thought of Barlow Manor devoid of all the treasures that made it a home.

“Don’t despair, my dear. I expect Copeland’s estates will be reclaimed by the Crown and disposed of to make reparations to your father. Not even well-connected barons can get away with attempted murder in order to obtain an early inheritance. If they could, we’d have patricide occurring on a grand scale,” he added wryly. “The Waters family hid your father to give him time to heal. In an attempt to stymie Copeland, they spun a yarn for the local authorities, stating you and your father had taken a journey. But Copeland and his compatriots staged a fire in the carriage house, sacrificing the life of some poor vagrant or itinerant worker and passing it off as your father.”
 

“Why would the authorities believe him? Surely Mr Waters told them what really happened?”

“He tried, but bearing false witness against a peer is a hanging offence. It was his word against that of Copeland’s, so he was forced to recant or face imprisonment followed by an appointment with the gallows.”
 

Lisa sighed. It galled her that the word of a good man could be so easily discounted while the word of an utter scoundrel like Lord Copeland was believed instead. And all because of a position he had not earned but been gifted by accident of birth.

“Your father’s men didn’t want to make too much of a fuss, what with Copeland hunting you and Sir George unable to speak for himself. They were also afraid of alerting Copeland to your whereabouts, so they decided it was best to lay low until I made an appearance. Better late than never.” Thomas smiled ruefully, but then his smile faded. “Though not soon enough, I fear. And now we find ourselves with this dreadful conundrum.”

“The solution is quite straight forward, Uncle Thomas.”
 

“So you say, but at the risk of appearing indelicate, I fear you may not have considered all the possible ramifications.”

Lisa puzzled at Thomas’s cryptic words until realisation dawned he was referring—circumspectly—to the possibility of her being with child.

“There’s no need for concern.” She stared down at her hands. “Nathaniel took
precautions
. I am not . . . you don’t have to worry about . . . there isn’t going to be . . .”

“Very good, very good.”
 

Thomas harrumphed, neither of them wanting to put too fine a point on such an intimate subject.

“Please, Uncle Thomas. I’d like to go home, if you’ll assist me.”

“Of course, my dear. I shall put a carriage at your disposal immediately, though I’m in a bit of a quandary how to undertake your transfer to Barlow Manor without enlightening the staff to your identity.”

Lisa pulled her scattered thoughts into order.
 

“Ruth—one of the servants who befriended me when I first arrived and is now acting as my lady’s maid—already knows the truth. I believe she and her beau, Ben, one of the grooms, would be willing to accompany me. Would it be possible for them to remain with me at Barlow Manor? I trust their discretion and believe the life would suit them. I’m sure my father would arrange to have your carriage returned at a later date when enough time has passed not to arouse suspicion.”

“A workable plan, Anneliese, though I’m not sure what to do in regards to chaperonage. It would be unseemly for you to traverse the countryside without proper companionship and protection.”
 

Lisa was forced to stifle a snort when she considered the journey she had taken two months earlier.
 

“I have it.” Thomas’s expression lightened. “I shall arrange for my younger sister, Penelope, Lady Watson, to accompany you. Her estate is not more than two hours’ drive from here, so you can collect her on your way. She’s widowed and complains of boredom now her two boys are off at school, so I’m sure she would jump at the opportunity for a little adventure. A satisfactory outcome for all concerned, I believe.”

Smiling wanly, Lisa could not bring herself to agree with Thomas’s summation, but she was grateful the arrangements for her journey home seemed to be falling into place. The sooner she made a start, the less likely her secret would be revealed.
 

After thanking Thomas for his kindness, she curtsied and then excused herself to prepare for the long journey ahead.

“Anneliese?” he called as she reached the door. “I do appreciate the courage your decision has required, and I believe I understand the sacrifice you are making. You are a brave young lady.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, before making her way to her rooms.

To her relief, Ruth was only too willing to accompany her on the journey to Henbury. Ben, as she suspected, would have followed Ruth anywhere, and agreed to both the change in position and the need for secrecy without question.

Packing up her belongings took a lot longer than when Lisa had prepared for her harried departure from Barlow Manor. She doubted she would wear the dark blue dress again, but she couldn’t bring herself to discard it. Ruth urged her to take the new gowns when Lisa would have left them behind.

“Ye don’t want to wear the same dress the whole way back to Henbury, and these’ll only be thrown aside or go back into storage if ye don’t take ’em.”
 

Lisa nodded, grateful to have the decision made for her, though she left out the few gowns that were not appropriate for the position in society to which she was returning. Carefully tucking away the white negligee set she had worn for Nathaniel just two evenings prior, she did her best not to dwell on the memory, though she suspected she would relive it many times during the lonely days ahead.

To Lisa’s surprise, Lady Rebecca came to visit not long before she was due to depart.

“I hope you don’t mind the intrusion?” Nathaniel’s sister asked once they were alone, Ruth having gone to pack her own few belongings and make her farewells.
 

The story being told was that Lisa was being sent to Nathaniel’s estate accompanied by Ruth and Ben, a useful explanation for their joint departure and a likely tale. It wasn’t unreasonable to expect the Duke would have demanded Nathaniel send his new mistress packing upon his return. Lord and Lady Cahill were also preparing for an imminent departure, and with the Duke and Duchess having only just arrived, the household was in disarray which worked to Lisa’s benefit with few questions being asked.

“How may I help you, Lady Rebecca?” she asked.

“Please, call me Rebecca.” The girl took a seat, directing Lisa to follow suit.
 

“I can’t say I fully understand the events that have transpired in my absence,” she said and Lisa nodded. She would have been in the exact same boat if their positions had been reversed, perplexed and curious. “While I have my suspicions,” Rebecca continued. “I expect my family will contrive to keep me in the dark—for my own good, of course—regardless of whether these matters affect me directly or not.”